Hi Everyone
I am not sure if this is best suited for General Discussion or Advice but I have placed it here
I am looking to play a braggart charlatan type character pretty soon. Think Gilderoy Lockhart from Harry Potter.
I am making him a Daring Champion Cockatirce Cavalier so I can fully utilise a mechanic for bragging about how great I am
The conceit is that he is going to claim to be a "Holy Paladin" or "Holy Champion". Declaring a Smite (when it is actually a challenge, etc).
Now I know there is a long post of Braggart taunts somewhere but from memory these were focusing on insulting rival combatants
I would like some help coming up with fun "achievements" that he could be lay claim to. The game is level 4 so I would like them to be outlandish but not completely absurd. I would also like them to tie to Golarian lore - so something about battling undead in Ustalav etc.
As a starter I will be either having mithral or darkleaf armour (encumbrance is a nightmare) so will try and claim it as a gift from the elves of Kyonin
It might actually be a good excuse to swap my longsword for either a cutlass or scimitar and tie it to some "adventure" on the Shackles or in Qadira
Anything fun and silly.
Also I have some left over wealth of a few hundred GP for gear (but pretty much no carrying capacity). Are there any fun trinkets that could be claimed to having some kind of outlandish story behind their gifting to this character?
(I believe the game is set in Absalom so I also want to put in some kind of Society reference - "special consultant" or something)
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Remember that time you were about to take the Test of the Starstone and Aroden appeared to you on that dark and foggy night? He said why waste your time doing a silly test to prove something that was inevitable. Sure, it might have just been a fisherman passing in the fog... but what are the odds of running into a fisherman and a beggar on the street at that hour? Clearly it was Aroden in his guises, telling you to go back to the tavern and have another drink.
"Wait for him to show up in some other guises to be sure? Yeah, if you were a normal dense adventurer who needed to be held by the hand and guided step by step through a scenario. I figured it out right off and knew I was meant for greatness. Probably could've figured it out from the first guise, but I had drunk an entire keg of ale, so I was a little distracted, what with being so sober and clear-headed. I had been thinking up a new dramatic play and two new stanzas for the Absolom Theatre in my head when I passed the first one."
You should carry a nice silk ribbon, maybe a bit tattered. Claim it belonged to a princess of a savage tribe. She was taller and stronger than the men of her village, and none were worthy until you washed up in the river alongside their home after going over a waterfall while trying to save a team of horses that had been swept away by the current. Of course, after you bested all the men in her village with your feats of strength, appetite, and romance she begged you to stay and rule with her, but you were destined to rule your own kingdom, plus you had promised to deliver that wagon. Having gathered up the scattered belongings, you completed your job.
"Bring her with me, to live among these people? No, this civilization is too narrow-minded to accept a troll princess."
Then there's that piece of sailcloth you have from that time you were fishing out in the Bay of Abendago and hooked a whale and after a 12 hour battle it finally pulled your craft into the Eye of Abendago and during the next four hours of battling both wind and whale you managed to pull it right up to the side of the boat and plop that vial of medicine right into its mouth to cure it of whatever was ailing it like you promised that strange hermit out on that lonely island you would do.
"Don't believe me? Well, just go ask that strange fellow, livin' out there, starin' at that storm day and night. Why, I scarcely had time to grab hold of the mask and rigging as the sails torn apart in the hurricane and glide my way to shore. This is all that I have left of that sail now."
Did I tell you about the time I arm wrestled the tarrasque...
I'd say take a brief look through the Adventurer's Guide and Villain Codex. Pick a few factions and carry cheap knockoffs of their signature items, claiming to have aided them, or had a run in.
During his childhood tutoring, he passed the archery courses with an empty quiver and a longsword.
He can't go to the worldwound to crusade anymore, because there's a bounty on his head and it would be too dangerous for the other party members. He's just looking out for them. Really.
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Google Chuck Norris facts, adapt for Golarion.
Dave Justus wrote: Google Chuck Norris facts, adapt for Golarion. For sure. Few things are outrageous as Chuck Norris/Mr. T jokes. Any adaptation thereof would be very fitting for a braggart.
I will be borrowing some of Abd al-Hazir's ideas :
"Feel free to just stand around screaming." (Okay, this one is something that was actually told to him.) And you can add : "In the end, I will save the day."
"You know, people have compared me to the great warriors - [insert some famous names]. Humility prevents me from commenting on such things, of course." (This one is from him.)
Oh, and don't forget your famous anti-goblin (or whatever) method, based on the right usage of a shoe. You discovered it while you were ambushed in your sleep - yes, every great hero has to sleep at some point. Usually you would sleep in armour and with your weapons ready, of course, you are, after all, the greatest knight. But you were with a lady, see? One should show respect to the ladies, especially when the lady has been courting the great you with such dedication. So, you were ambushed while not having your combat gear around by those sneaky creatures - a whole army of them, actually. So you grabbed whatever was within range - shoes, high heel green shoes belonging to the fair lady, as weapons - and proceeded to exterminate the enemy. As the first ranks fell to the vorpal shoes - they were not actually vorpal, of course, but they earned the nickname thanks to the great skill with which you used them - the others ran away, scared that they had underestimated you so much.
Let me tell you about this time I grappled a succubus ....
Lanathar wrote: As a starter I will be either having mithral or darkleaf armour (encumbrance is a nightmare) so will try and claim it as a gift from the elves of Kyonin There were some fun comments in one of the Three Musketeers movies in which a braggart character is constantly telling people that he got this scarf from 'the Empress of the Americas' or 'the Czarina of Tokyo' or other ridiculous imaginary women that he'd wooed in the past.
His horse could be 'a rare Qadiran breed that has the blood of genies,' and was a gift from the 'Witch-Queen of Qadira,' for instance. (It's just a horse.)
His banner could be the lost royal banner of House Rorgavia, from Brevoy, which he's holding on to for the surviving child of the deposed king, and will return when the young ruler-to-be is old enough to reclaim his throne.
He's got a battered pocketwatch/compass dealie that looks kind of like a Wayfinder, but isn't, and explains that a normal-looking Wayfinder would be a dead giveaway to his enemies, and secret agents of the 11th member of the Decemvirate carry concealed tokens such as this.
Maybe read up on the Baron Münchausen (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baron_Munchausen)
He's what I first thought of, when I heard of "outrageous claims".
Stuff like pulling yourself out of quicksand by your own hair and such.
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How else do you get out of quicksand?
This isn't even my strongest form. In my prime I became so powerful the gods had to bind my hidden talents deep within me, and erase the memories of those who knew so they could go back to leading normal lived after witnessing my greatness.
Aboleth? Yeah, I gave 'em all their ideas.
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"I am the last heir in the royal bloodline of Galt"
"Galt doesn't have royalty"
"Well it certainly doesn't have any now."
(it never had a king, btw, excluding the period it belong to Cheliax; but hey- claims to remote relation to royal lineage when a lot of the people that could argue against you are dead or in hiding; it also opens a plot hook for this to get you into trouble if people from Galt hear you)
Threw a troll ten feet into the fire pit? Check.
Played chess against a Metallic dragon and won? Check.
Made that claim to a chromatic and saved the party when you beat him at chess having bet their lives against his treasure? Check.
Drowned a hook beast? Check.
Out drank a bar of dwarves, having started early and drinking stronger than they? Check.
Ridden a wild and highly irritated roc on a dare? Check.
Been bitten by a large majority of venomous creatures and not only survived, but been rendered adequately impervious to most toxins? Check.
Eaten at the tables of no less than three kings? Check.
Been personally accosted and defended your honor against a sworn-celibate priestess overcome by your presence? Check.
Rather well endowed, weather permitting. Check.
Has never yet broken a proper sweat, being of a cleanly sort and with little reason to exert himself over traditional activities. Check.
Has lost, donated, and given away more fortunes gained in luck, skill, and by right of conquest than most nobles can take claim to in a score of generations. Check.
Has tied copper wire into knots with his tongue. Check.
Has sang a siren to bed. Check.
This is really deserving of the Old Spice Gentleman class, most interesting man in the world, sort of thing.
Shiroi wrote: Played chess against a Metallic dragon and won? Check.
Made that claim to a chromatic and saved the party when you beat him at chess having bet their lives against his treasure? Check.
The hard part is not winning. The hard part is getting away from the chromatic dragon afterwards.
Even the most generous chromatics- greens- are likely to force you to stay in their lair to use for chess practice (because they are perfectionist nerds). Everything else will just use various flavors of breath right away.
Shiroi wrote: Has never yet broken a proper sweat, being of a cleanly sort and with little reason to exert himself over traditional activities. Check. "Winchesters do not sweat, they perspire, and *I* do not perspire."
“I’m the reason they say, ‘don’t be so cavalier about it’. Everything is just so easy for me.”
“I’m kind of a big deal.”
“I know it looked like I ran away back there. But that opponent seemed so weak as to be unworthy. I ran off to see if I could find a tougher one while you guys handled the light work.”
"You probably don't know it, but I am actually a member of the Knights of Salvation. The last sworn defender and savior of civilization in the Sodden Lands. Oh, I don't mean there aren't other members still alive, elves or old men and such. I mean I was the last knight to be sworn in to that prestigious and brave order."
"It was disbanded over 30 years ago you say? Well, this was just after my time in the Eye of Abendego. I had glided across the bay to safety using my ship's mast and rigging and landed near an old fortification that was part of the Abendego Piercing, a series of shelters made to guide survivors to safety during the flood and tragedy when the Eye formed. There I found an elderly human who had been trapped and forgotten in the newly-formed swamps and marshes. While I was preparing to just pick the old man up and carry him out of the swamps on my shoulders, we ran into a tribe of primitive boggards."
"It had been a wet and fertile season for those toad-like savages and, as you know, their young must hunt and kill a sentient creature to be considered full warriors. Well, it seems that over a hundred of their young had survived spawning and had put it in their knobby heads that this helpless old man and myself were to be their prey."
"Normally, I'd have grabbed a stick and some stones or used my fists to flatten them all, but I had an old man on my shoulders and I couldn't risk him being bitten, injured, or harmed during the dogpile and melee that would have entailed. So we fell back to the old shelter and I rigged up some traps, barricades, and defenses from my makeshift glider (it's why I only have this last scrap of sailcloth left). While my cunning traps and defenses confused and split the horde of boggards, I went down into the cellars and dug an escape tunnel through the rock and foundation with nothing but my own two bare hands... and an old rusty pick and shovel I had found down there."
"I dug 200 feet through rock and mud and swam out into the bay itself, pulling the old man to safety right behind me. It was there a friendly whale I had helped earlier swam by and carried us north, to a shipping lane where we were picked up by a buccaneer frigate transporting the daughter of one of the Shackles' greatest captains to her betrothed (but that's another story). As we swam away, wouldn't you know that I had dug through and undermined so much of the foundation of the old fort that it began to tip and sink into the marsh so much that it's all leaned over like a snaggled, old tooth now. I think that's how it came to be called Fangspire."
"Anyhow, turns out this old man was a senior member of the Kights of Salvation, left behind and presumed lost all this time. For my bravery, and of course, for bringing a survivor from the Sodden Lands, he knighted me right then and there (he wasn't aware they'd been disbanded all this time) and named me Protector of Humanity against Humidity. Of course, he had no spurs to give me, but I don't need spurs, being a natural horseman and rider."
"I once did the Cheliax run in twelve fathoms."
"Badges? We don't need no stinking badges."
"I'm the captain now."
"Geb? yeh, Geb's my uncle."
Universal and eternal.
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No one bows like Gaston
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blahpers wrote: No one bows like Gaston
Awesome Blows like Gaston
No one min-maxes his saving throws like Gaston!
No one rolls natural 18s at home like Gaston!
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