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So I'm building up a number of races for my homebrew campaign and was looking for feedback on the most complete of the 9 that I am working on. Link to the google doc is here
I could use feedback on the various racial traits I've selected and created on my own. I believe if I have done my math correctly the race comes out to 12 RP on the race builder but I could be off as I've altered a number a bit and I'm estimating on others.
So yeah just tell me what you all think. I'm looking for a balance level that is on par with core races and would love suggestions for further racial feats, favored class bonuses, or racial spells. Thanks for the help ahead of time everyone.
Any ideas on equipment, possible feats, favored class bonuses. Stuff that looks out of balance. Just looking for any feedback
It looks pretty good but slightly overpowered. I would give them a -2 penalty to Strength or something you feel is appropriate.
Not to be this guy buuuut otters aren't rodents!
Humanoid Otters? Granted, didn't expect that, but not bad. Keen intellect seems a bit too much though.
Also, Tunner? how did you come up with that name?
First, I recommend giving them a stat penalty, probably strength since they are small size. It's generally best to stick to the two good one bad formula unless you have a damn good reason. It's good for balance and for flavor.
You should put the swim speed in with the other movements, and also 50 ft is a lot. Since they have a relatively normal base speed for a small size creature, I'd drop that to 30, 40 at most.
I also think it is weird for the light ability to get the benefits of being both magical and non-magical. I'd say just let it be a spell-like ability which functions as the spell and can actually counter and dispel darkness or make it a supernatural ability which functions in darkness spells but can't dispel them, but also cannot be dispelled and doesn't provoke attacks of opportunity.
Other than that, the base race is fine.
Okay so I gave them a -2 to dex. My rational is that as a water based race they wouldn't be as graceful on land and their size bonus to AC means this won't be a huge detriment. I was thinking about doing strength but I'm worried it wouldn't be that much of a negative as the only skills it effects they have a massive bonus to 1 and they aren't exactly going to be pushing much damage being small sized anyways. Don't want to discourage strength based builds too much, plus small size favors Dex based builds already.
I changed moon glow to just be an (Ex) ability. Honestly I wasn't aware that these abilities had any effect in magical darkness of they did not dispel it. That's a misreading of the rules on my part.
Swim speed reduced to 40 ft as I would like them to be at least a little bit above average at swimming.
Otters aren't rodents! Shhgfedzsawfvhynmonb yup messed that up. Guess I just assumed.
Any further suggestions for feats or favored class bonuses? Having trouble being creative there.
Mass Kneebreaker wrote: Humanoid Otters? Granted, didn't expect that, but not bad. Keen intellect seems a bit too much though.
Also, Tunner? how did you come up with that name?
The name I cannot remember. Of the 9 races I'm building this is the only one I've used in campaigns before. It's got to be 3 or 4 years old. The name and antlers are about the only thing that's stuck around.
What part of keen intellect is a bit much in your eyes? The ability to use knowledge checks untrained or the +2 bonus. I suppose this is better than a lvl 1 bard but my though was that it never scales up so it's only a minor buff in the long run.
I assume by 'long life span' for the Tunners you are comparing that to the other homebrew races of your world, so that's fine. Obviously I can't compare their power level with the others yet.
I will try and stay out of editor mode too much, and of course, these are just opinions and observations, attribute them whatever value you wish.
Built for the Elements
Since typically this is only ever just going to be 1d6 at a time (except in some rare special case) this seems clunky as it works. I would recommend just going with giving a +2 racial bonus to saves against hot or cold weather. Having the chance to just avoid the non-lethal damage entirely (and thus other effects, like fatigue) is probably better.
Moon Glow
Like Makeitstop mentioned, this is really confusing. Recommend you just avoid using the words 'cast' or 'spell-like abilty' and use wording like:
'Tunners can illuminate their antlers with the soft glow of moonlight, similar to a light spell. While extraordinary, this illumination can function in even magical darkness. Treat it as a light spell equal to half the Tunner's HD for purposes of suppression.'
Obviously that's just an example, you can make it not be suppressed by any power of darkness spell, but my opinion is that as a non-magical effect, that leaves a really bad taste (especially for a moon-type effect, rather than a sun-type effect).
The description of the race that mentions the antlers could be read as only the males having them, so maybe rewording to 'males tend to have the longest, at 5–6 inches'.
Also, you use the word 'most', which means that some tunner do not have antlers. How does this work for them? I had thought maybe there would be an alternate racial trait that possibly removed the antlers for something else, but I don't see one specifically. I suspect Unfazed may have been intended, but it merely says that stunts their growth, but I'll get there in a minute.
Special Interests
I think this is too obvious as an alternate choice. Giving up untrained knowledge checks (at a +2) for one or two class skills is probably not a fair trade. I get it, you can have a +2 bonus to a lot of potential Knowledge checks, but those will only ever give you the information of a DC 10 or so check regardless. Plus, once the two selected skills (which will always be of benefit to the PC's class, since they're the ones choosing them) become class skills, they just need a rank to gain a +3 bonus to each (or +5 to the one.)
I think this needs to be restricted, possibly with the explanation that while all tunner are curious, some are more focused on certain areas. Then let them choose up to two skills to become class skills (or one at +2) but they must come from Craft, Knowledge, Perform, or Profession. This will keep every single player from selecting it to gain basically just 2 free class skills, by restricting to a more focused study of certain hobbies. Obviously, it might seem like a bard could benefit from this, since they could take Perform... but in that case, Perform is already a class skill (they'd have to just choose one specific for a +2 bonus, which isn't so bad for a trait.)
Fjord Runner
This alternate racial trait is better in almost every way than Built for the Elements that it replaces. Cold Resistance 2 and higher resistance to cold weather while only losing 1 point of protection from hot weather. Only in the specific case of a campaign set in a desert or hot environment specifically would this not be a no-brainer choice. There should be an actual (and likely to occur) downside. For example (and I am just phrasing for expediency not saying use it verbatim):
'Tunner native to colder regions excrete a thicker layer of natural oils into their fur. These tunner gain resist cold 2 and receive a +4 racial bonus to saves against cold weather. Their natural oils are slightly flammable, however, and they take a -2 penalty to saves against fire effects, including saves to resist catching fire. This trait replaces built for the elements.'
Again, just an example, and it changes your non-lethal cold resistance (since that will rarely actually have any effect except on a roll of 1 or 2).
Unfazed
While Endurance would stack with my suggestion of a racial bonus from Built for the Elements, since it's just against one types of save (against hot or cold weather) I don't think a high bonus is too bad. I would probably change the wording that tunner with this trait don't have antlers at all (hence no Moon Glow) rather than just saying stunted and leaving people to wonder whether that means shorter or what.
Feats:
Accomplished Swimmer
I just don't see it happening except for someone who really, really wants a high swim speed. You have to use your 3rd level feat (then your 5th and 7th possibly). Plus, as mentioned, they already have a very high swim speed and there's probably better ways to increase your swim speed magically or otherwise without using your 3rd through 7th feats (I suspect it should be lowered).
To be more constructive, I would recommend making this feat make them better swimmers, not faster. Give them a racial bonus to check made to avoid hazards (+2 is probably enough, since creatures with Swim speeds already get a +8 and can Take 10), in addition to they can make one turn of 90 degrees or less when taking a run or charge action while swimming. Probably don't need that part about taking it up to 3 times (unless you want to add an additional 90 degree turn for each one, but I don't know how that would go over) and can probably remove the 3rd level restriction.
Lunar Blast
As far as I can tell, despite the description, this is a once per day daylight spell. It says blinding, but I see no actual effect that does so. Even if it did, I don't think 'Lunar Blast' captures the description very well. I think of a damaging blast or beam of light that harms enemies or creatures of darkness or something. You could possibly add in a blinding affect for (non-tunner) creatures within a certain radius to blind them for 1 round maybe (though I still wouldn't call it a blast (maybe 'Lunar glare' or 'Lunar brilliance'). You could possibly allow it to be taken multiple times, with each one adding one use per day.
Light of Avriel
You use the term 'to a maximum of daylight'. I assume you meant, to a maximum of 'bright' or 'as a daylight spell' possibly (though less likely).
Again, these are just personal observations and thoughts.
Edit: Some of the things I mentioned may have been adjusted while I was posting this (like wording for Moon Glow and Swim speeds and such) just in case some of things don't seem to make sense or if you've already adjusted them.
Pizza Lord wrote: A Lot Okay now this is some crazy good feedback. Thanks for the editing work turning what I wanted into proper rules jargon as I've had trouble in the past getting my rules lingo up to snuff. I especially appreciate the attention paid to the actual rave description and possible issues there with consistency and clarity.
So nearly all of the changes you suggested will be updated as I agree with most all of them. You were spot on with the assumption that built for the elements was so weirdly worded as I was looking to not stack with endurance.
I did not mean for there to be a blinding effect at all on lunar blast (since renamed) it was simply the wording I chose and didn't think about it's overlap with game terms.
My only argument is with accomplished swimmer. I suppose I wanted it to be a feat that typically wasn't good but supports the race and would be quite good for a specific archetype. I think I am going to combine your idea with it and reduce it to being able to be taken once and giving the 90 degree turn durring a charge while swimming.
Updated for changes above. I'm also trying to think of racial class archetypes that would be good for a Tunner. Perhaps a ranger built around their swim speed and natural water adaptations? Thoughts?
Good to have some free Tunner (and not really antlery otter pops) stuff out there. ;)
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