Collecting my thoughts



Hello paizo community,

I am writing this topic to gain different perspective and opinions because in our current PF home campaign group I feel sometimes a bit depressed. Please, note that these moments are rare and actually all players and GM in the group are fun to play with. Every session is a wild amount of fun and we are a type of group who loves to joke around a lot. Really, most of the time, it's great and I shouldn't complain at all.

But there are the moments when things hit me in such a way, that it's depressive to watch. I am literally confused and unsure if it's me causing the problem or someone else. In short, I am trying to collect my thoughts here in this topic.

We are a three man party currently, but it might hopefully change in future. From the first session, we were thrown into the dungeon and stripped of every item. We were slaves for a hunt in which we miraculously survived (cool plot story) and ended up in a metropolitan city on a specific plane. A gang found us immediately and stripped us further of anything we had before getting rescued by an NPC healer and from that point on, we have been doing minor jobs for tens of gold pieces, albeit, most of them unsuccessfully. The entire thing horzaradic (yes, I just invented new word) when we ended up within a feud of two merchants. We kept switching sides a lot and in the end it ended up with one dead merchant not by our hand. The surviving merchant set a 1500 gp bounty on us and we are struggling with the mercenary company and every other NPC in the town so much that it's above paranoid anymore.

I am not gonna say we did great choices. In fact, there was some amount of thievery and even murder involved (yeah, we are of very mixed alignments currently) and we were all kind of guilty for it, but what's bugging me is that... Nothing EVER goes right.

Every mission is fail or botched. We meet and make more enemies then friends and it's starting to feel as we are fighting against invisible titan. In first 10 sessions, we played with rogue who can't do much besides having skills, me as a wizard without spellbook and alchemist who carried us hard through fights. Every decent common fight was though as hell and if we receive too much damage, it sets us back on loot and time too much, giving time „invisible titan“ to act against us.

Last session now was great and fun. I rolled a new character, a goblin barbarian who I wanted to see if he can actually survive long enough but in our roleplay, we ended up with devils. A party member wanted to sell his soul to get himself and us out of the mess, but after devil started talking about „order and peace“ and „writing on a contract“ to my little goblin, and wouldn't stop talking, he spitted on him and everything escalated again with party saving my goblin by signing the contracts. Now, I feel bad for causing such in-game conflict of roleplay but players didn't mind it. We are now bound to join in endless war between demons and devils.

So after actually reading through this entire post, can someone give me another perspective or opinion of, why am I feeling a bit unhappy?

Thanks for the thoughts,


Dark Archive

You feel like your DM is messing with you. Honestly it just seems like your campaign is more about the feeling of helplessness, kinda like a horror campaign. If he runs it right, you'll probably do something totally cool later and feel awesome.

First the standard answer... Talk to your group.

It sounds like you are at odds with what kind of game you would like...

You are running a quite chaotic, slightly evil game, and having fun... But: you (and maybe others as well) would like more heroic and epic feeling in the game...

Try suggesting it to your group... There's a good chance they wanna try too...

Sounds like everybody - including the DM - play chaotic neutral...
I've found that these "non-heroic"/evil campaigns are not really satisfying over a longer period of time.

Whatever, as they say above: talk to your group.


Thanks on responses so far,

I mentioned several times some things to the players and GM but didn't actually talk yet about it since I am not sure if I should yet. I can't complain about something I don't know myself.

It might just be that I want to play a "standard hero" setting instead of "do what you want" setting.


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