I was reading through this adventure and noticed some things that I am wondering about:
1) The locations are to be explored in a specific order so that the PCs can find all the clues. However, since the PCs are flying to the mine, they will probably see all three locations at once (from the air). What is to keep them from going to one of the other locations first instead of going to the Karggat Mine? This is how players are, after all. (Mine are, anyway.)
2) The Sultur Mill outpost has pipes coming in from the north in room C7 (the silo room). These pipes are for the transportation of ore from the Karggat Mine. However, if I look at the map on page 3, the Karggat Mine is lying south of the Sultur Mill. Do these pipes have bends? And if so, how is the ore kept flowing through them? If the ore is not transported via the pipes, then how is it transported? And what are the pipes meant for?
If the pipes run from the mine to the Sultur mill, where in the mine do the pipes start? Also, ore should then be flowing upward, so how am I to interpret this?
3) According to the description in the adventure the Karggat Mine and the Sultur Mill are somehow linked. But on the map they are quite far apart. How am I to interpret this?
I would point out there is supposed to be a Mana Storm brewing. So having low visibility is believable. Also the ship's Captain not wanting to deviate from the flight plan in such circumstances would be understandable as well. I admittedly have to read through the maps more to get a good feel for them in three dimensions however.
The player characters probably pass over dozens of locations on the ride out. No need to single out the ones that actually are important to the adventure. Why is that factory any more interesting than (for example) the giant scrap yard, the mutant barter town encampment, or huge ranch?