[Spoilers] Funny Rise of the Runelords Moments


Rise of the Runelords

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This one is funny for me as the GM. And the group loved it.

We are at the very end of Rise of the Runelords. The group has 3 Mythic Tiers and that makes some fights... easier than they could be. So I decided to make Karzoug a Mythic 10 Archmage. For every Projected Image they eliminate, he loses a Tier (rather than a level), without a save. They found four.

The very first thing I do is have Karzoug burn points of Mythic to cast a Mythic Wish. His wish? "I wish my foes do not have any Mythic ability to face me with."

The Sorceress had cast Spell Reflection as a buff going into the fight. I rolled a 9 for the spell levels. The spell bounces off of her and hits Karzoug... who promptly fails his save against his own Mythic Wish, losing all of his Mythic Tiers in the process. To add insult to injury, every single player beside the sorceress made their save, meaning they all have 2-3 Mythic points left to them while Karzoug has nothing (but artifacts, spells, five giants, and a dragon).

Sadly since high level fights take forever, we're only on the 2nd round. He did manage to trap the swashbuckling arcane trickster behind a Wall of Force though so their major damage dealer is currently out of commission. Alas. ;)


Realizing that the Runeslave Cauldron was an Artifact, and therefore nigh indestructible, my players just decided to drag it along as portable cover.


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Book 1 spoiler:
So, in the furnace room in the glassworks, there are a whole bunch of long tables full of various glassworking supplies. Goblins capered all over the place chucking bottles of glass powders and alchemical reagents. One of them grabbed a pair of tongs, thrust it into the furnace, then hopped onto the nearest table and ran at the party warpriest. Hey, high ground bonus!

You know, from being on a table.

Positioned near a big gaping maw of fire and molten glass.

...

...

... (┛ಠ_ಠ)┛彡┻━┻ ︵ ( \o°o)\ *glop* *scream* *sizzle*


Not quite sure what happened there ... ?


I interpret that as "he flipped the table sending the goblin into the furnace" :D


Indeed. Most gobliny moment so far, and they haven't even made it to Thistletop yet.


My group has finally made it to Thistletop, working their way through the thistles towards the bridge. They ascribe to the continual right turn policy in exploring, so their first encounter ended up being Gogmurt and Tangletooth. They kill Tangletooth and cause Gogmurt to flee through the wall and this ensues:

Paladin: "What? He can just walk through walls? Okay, sure, and the next goblin will fly."
Sorcerer "It's fine, we'll go around to the entrance, he must be going for reinforcements."
Druid: "Wait, wait, wait! It's woodland stride, he's a druid, I can do it too! You guys go that way, I'll chase him and slow him down."

The druid is a halfling with a 20 ft. movement speed against Gogmurt with a 30 ft. movement speed. It takes two rounds for the math to click...

Druid "How is he so fast? He's little, I'm little, come on!"


In the Runeforge, the party just carefreely walked into the Shimmering Veils without any preparation, thinking: "Illusions? They are nothing to fear, if we know they are there... We just need to disbelieve."

Then they've entered a corridor lined with mirrors (I've made the Mirrors of Opposition hide in a forest of normal mirrors) and got so spooked by them, they started shattering every mirror they passed by. The party wizard got upset, suspecting they are destroying potentially powerful magic items, and it almost ended with PvP... before they've met any actual obstacle.


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The group I'm GMing recently took to rubbing elbows around town (near the end of book 1) and heartily getting into role-playing with the population.

Some of the funniest moments:

Dhampir Fabulous

Spoiler:
Upon being recognized for what he is a few times, Marko the Dhampir Hedgewitch (playing spheres of power and might) made it a point to look around for a decent make-up kit. I gave him three locations and he made a beeline to Vernah's Fine Clothing run by Rynshinn Povali.

She makes a keen sense motive check once pressed for make-up with a failed bluff check to mask his intentions. It was more a paranoid bluff check than anything. I had made him nervous enough by rolling quietly to myself during nearly every conversation he'd been a part of and revealing very little about it.

Povali: And what, may I ask, are you seeking to hide?

Marco: (Stammering while rolling a Natural 20 to bluff again) It... I... (breaking down in false tears) Im just so ugly! I want to look like a normal person!

Povali: (Rolled a five) Oh sweetie! No! Don't ever say that about yourself! Come here behind the counter and we will see if we have something that could accentuate and help you see your natural beauty!

He eventually convinced her to not only sell a disguise kit to him at a discount, but expertly apply his first use for free and throw in a small handbag from some big name designer in Magnimar. ("Don't make fun of my Vera Bradley!!") I played her as delighted to have someone to play with as she flitted about gathering makeup and making him sit still.

He later strutted into the Rusty Dragon where the rest of the party was kicking back with some downtime like a Peacock in heat.

Scissor Me Timbers!

Spoiler:
My wife plays a female Varisian Bloodrager who is in town as a mercenary looking to live the high life by cashing in on a handsome goblin bounty.

The very same night, post Peacock Dhampir arrival, I ran the short bit where Ameiko's father stomps into the bar and has it out with her. Thus far, Ameiko had been drinking heavily and playing a few sets on the stage (Bard 2/Rogue 3) as she regularly does a few times a week. Mid trip back to the stage with lute in tow, her father arrives. The spat is had and Marco ("Polo" is often heard when I call his initiative) decides to intercept Lonjiku on his way out for no other reason than he looks like he needs an attitude adjustment (possibly to chum up with Ameiko).

At the same time, Gheara (Romanian for 'Fang') wants to stop Marco from making more of a scene and play peacekeeper... or at least "keep our pieces from touching their peace keeper" and lunges to stop him.

Our Cleric, all the while, is rolling linguistics checks and listening stoically from down the bar.

I call for Dex checks and roll one for Ameiko as well.

Gheara grabs Marco, but he gets right up to old man Kaijitsu before she can get her hands on him and they are both quickly shoved back a few steps by a charging Ameiko.

Old man hurls insults at the party over her shoulder, going from cowardly old man (how he reacted to Marco's advance) to viscious hate-beast-with-a-human-shield before storming out the open door.

As Marco attempts to console Ameiko, who is hanging her head in anger and frustration, Gheara quietly closes the door.

Marco: Are you alright? Can I get you another drink?

Ameiko: (Incredulity simmering in a look made of sarcasm) No. No, thank you. You really shouldn't try to help people, I think. (She turns to Gheara) You, I would love to share a drink with. Thank you for trying. (She winks and turns to the rest of the tavern which is stone silent) Free drinks all round! Let's get back to the music!

Later, after another set, Gheara and Ameiko have that drink where I get to exposit some plot and backstory and (I hope tastefully) throw a small twist into the story. Shortly thereafter, Ameiko asks Gheara up to her room and 'adult themes' are implied without any real description.

Naturally, this is more than enough for everyone's imaginations, Gheara's player is a mix between shocked, happy, and breathless with laughter as jokes fly around the table. The funniest one being a sarcastic comment around our fourth or fifth tangent on the subject of lesbian sex and how or if the rage helped at all (this one had pirates somehow), "Ohhh Scissor me timbers!"


So last night I ran a short session 1 of RotRL for my playtest group. Didn't get the chance to finish the initial fighting, but had one goblin nearly crit on the gnome druid and another actually crit on the human sorcerer.

Because it's THAT kind of group, the goblin crit was described as running forehead first into the sorcerer, at crotch level.

The druid's response to his splitting headache was to shout "HEY MOE!" while using shocking grasp to do a 3 Stooges eye-poke. He missed, so followed up with a Gibbs Smack.

The third goblin was trying to catch swallowtail butterflies with its mouth. He succeeded as his head went flying from the fighter's crit with a greatsword.

The barbarian spent the entire fight enraptured by the bonfire in the center of the square. The GOBLIN barbarian.

During the festival games, the barbarian developed a new game for the festival: Throw the Goblin. Six competitors partook, chucking the barbarian off the cliff as far into the water as they could. The winner was the blacksmith.

To top it all off, after the PCs become named the Heroes of Sandpoint next session, the sorcerer has a meeting with Amieko to discuss a brew he developed that he calls Horny Horse and has a unicorn on the label. The characer's accent makes it sound like he's saying "Horny Whores".


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So I just started running RotRL with 4/5 of my usual group (as a backup for when the 5th works night shifts) and so far, it's been hilarious. The current highlight comes from right after the initial goblin attack.

The party had just saved Aldern Foxglove, with the sorcerer's dog (the sorcerer and his dog are based on Shaggy and Scooby-Doo... we are not the most serious group) doing most of the damage after the wizard (a Sylph named Woosh) had enlarged it. The only woman in the group was the GMPC who I decided wasn't going to be Aldern's obsession because I wanted it to be the PC, so he was going to target whoever did the most damage... so, the dog. That wasn't going to fly, so I thought "oh, he'll find out who the dog belongs to. He hunts. He had a dog protecting him from goblins (I had his dog survive because I figured my party would care more about the dog than the person)." So he feeds the dog some beef jerky from his pocket and asks who "this magnificent creature" belongs to, only for the wizard to immediately say, "I made it bigger." The sorcerer didn't say anything.

So now Aldern's going to be obsessed with a Sylph wizard named Woosh who refers to himself in the third person and is played by the biggest powergamer in the party. I can't wait until we get to The Skinsaw Murders.

We've also decided that our Fighter is actually a sentient halberd possessing a person.


Java Man wrote:

Realizing that the Runeslave Cauldron was an Artifact, and therefore nigh indestructible, my players just decided to drag it along as portable cover.

IIRC (I'm AFB at the moment), the cauldron cannot be moved for a year once it's been "powered up" with a fire and starting ingredients.

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