First post (be gentle please)
Been away from the gaming world for about a decade... Was last seen playing 3.0/3.5 when it was actually new and forsale at stores! Liked the change up from the classic AD&D, but sadly didn't get the chance to pursue it due to a little thing called marriage... Since going on my 150 pound blond headed diet, I am getting back into gaming with Pathfinder... Loving it so far and am about to DM my first game in well over 15 years!
So, with that said... Couple of quick questions...
1) one of my players is my friends wife... She's never gamed before and asked me to take it easy on her... Uhmmm, back in my era of 90's gaming... Girls didn't play rpg's! So any advice or "Don't do THIS" would be appreciated from anyone with female player knowledge...
2) Since I'm a little rusty... Planning on running a module for now, starting with "Crypt of the Everflame" and thought it would make a good start... My question is... I haven't told a "story" in years and I'm looking for a few pointers to help me get back into DM'ing again... it might just be nerves, but any advice or "best way to start" (better hooks then others, etc..) this module/story would be appreciated...
1) one of my players is my friends wife... She's never gamed before and asked me to take it easy on her... Uhmmm, back in my era of 90's gaming... Girls didn't play rpg's! So any advice or "Don't do THIS" would be appreciated from anyone with female player knowledge...
Girls played in the 90s. Not as many as today, but they did. There are female gamers on these boards who have been playing for decades. I'm not one of them, but I've seen them around. In fact, the CEO of Paizo is a woman who's been playing for a very long time, and was one of WOTC's first employees. I'd be careful saying that sort of thing around here. Someone may get offended by it.
As a woman, I'd be pretty insulted if you treated me any different than a male gamer. I'd just act like you would with anyone new to the game.
2) Since I'm a little rusty... Planning on running a module for now, starting with "Crypt of the Everflame" and thought it would make a good start... My question is... I haven't told a "story" in years and I'm looking for a few pointers to help me get back into DM'ing again... it might just be nerves, but any advice or "best way to start" (better hooks then others, etc..) this module/story would be appreciated...
I haven't used this module. I'd just warn your group that you are rusty, do your best, and hope everything comes back to you. If it doesn't, I'd read over the Gamemastery section of the Core Rulebook or pick up the Gamemastery Guide.
1) no excessive violence, no sexism, just treat them as anybody else, just kinder. Be sure she has the right character for her.
2) I never played a module, but besides that you should probably figure out if you want a serious game or a funny/casual one. We started with the latter and it was impossible to change after the first session. You probably still have your choice from before 10 years, just be sure everybody is on board.
In my experience you can read all the good tips you want for good GMing, you will forget them the second the session starts. All you need is good intuition, imagination and inner calm.
The one I always forget is to include the environment into the fights, cliffs where people can be pushed off etc. the module should give you everything.
1) no excessive violence, no sexism, just treat them as anybody else, just kinder. Be sure she has the right character for her.
That applies to any player. There are male players who don't want this stuff, and female players who are perfectly fine with it. Please don't make blanket statements like that. It's better for a GM to know his or her group and tailor things to what they want than to say "Don't do X with females in the group".
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Yeah; expect a bunch of commenters who are going to show you just how politically progressive and totally philosophically advanced they are on this thread......expect them any time now,......
With a female player, my main deal is
1)leave out the whole "men's is stronger than women's IRL so I have to downgrade womenz STR score or the game is like totally unrealistic" schtick that some people can't get over, and
2)I'd totally leave out rape/sexual harassment/that type of crap because that's a real good way to hit raw nerves; I just totally whitewash that along with characters using the bathroom.
Where do you pee? Do you pee in the corner? Is anybody on guard duty while you pee? You need 4 rounds to get your armor back together after pooping in the dungeon yaddayadda.
other than that, I think it's a safe assumption that you know your wife better than I do; that stuff that makes her mad? Don't do that stuff.
I mean, the stuff that makes her mad that you know about.
And, in defense of self,.....I usually leave out the rape/sexual harassment type crap anyway; it's dross.
I also don't like to kill familiars, and if somebody has a pet dog or whatever that's a noncombatant, mysteriously nothing will happen to the dog.
That's just me though; I do that whether women are playing or not.
I don't tell anybody though.
Yeah; expect a bunch of commenters who are going to show you just how politically progressive and totally philosophically advanced they are on this thread......expect them any time now,......
With a female player, my main deal is
1)leave out the whole "men's is stronger than women's IRL so I have to downgrade womenz STR score or the game is like totally unrealistic" schtick that some people can't get over, and
Yea, best to do that.
2)I'd totally leave out rape/sexual harassment/that type of crap because that's a real good way to hit raw nerves; I just totally whitewash that along with characters using the bathroom.
Where do you pee? Do you pee in the corner? Is anybody on guard duty while you pee? You need 4 rounds to get your armor back together after pooping in the dungeon yaddayadda.
Really depends on the group. I use rape and sexual harassment all the time, but that's a personal preference, and I wouldn't use it with a player who would get upset by it. I find it's best to ask about their tolerance for certain content beforehand, and then tailor the campaign to fit it.
other than that, I think it's a safe assumption that you know your wife better than I do; that stuff that makes her mad? Don't do that stuff.
I mean, the stuff that makes her mad that you know about.
Pretty much.
Not going to comment on your first point except saying that running a game for people is just that, for people.
I have run COtE a few times, one of which was at a family Christmas session with my sisters, my Dad, my wife and my in-laws. The other was the beginning of a very successful campaign which is still going and about to get to part 3 of the trilogy, City of Golden Death.
Crypt is an excellent way to re-introduce yourself to GMing and certainly gave me the bug (I now have 3 APs I am running at the moment!) Just make sure you read it through thoroughly and don't be scared to change bits on the fly as needed, After all, it's all about the story!
It's very atmospheric too and I found it fairly easy to add in descriptions which cover all the senses and create an absorbing adventure. Above all, enjoy yourself!
And, in defense of self,.....I usually leave out the rape/sexual harassment type crap anyway; it's dross.
I also don't like to kill familiars, and if somebody has a pet dog or whatever that's a noncombatant, mysteriously nothing will happen to the dog.
That's just me though; I do that whether women are playing or not.
I don't tell anybody though.
If that works for you, it works for you. No need to defend it, as it isn't wrong, just different from others' approaches.
I'm also kind a a minimalist; re: Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho/shower scene, so kinda glossing over the extreme mayhem fits that.
It's challenging to me.
Oh, and Kelsey,.....I'm still ignoring you.
If you are ignoring me, what's the point of saying so? With all due respect, saying so seems unnecessary and insulting. I get it. You don't like me, and it's justified. I don't need it rubbed in. Why not just not say anything to me at all instead?
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Contextualization.
It's not necessarily about you.
(edit) closing thread now.
It is about me when you throw it in my face. If you are going to do it, just do it and don't say anything about it. I responded to your post because there were things I wanted to add to it for the OP. No need to use that as an excuse to remind me that you don't like me very much. You could just ignore me like you've been doing.
Yeah, Advice for the OP, go with the plot hooks in the module, a coming of age initiation test. That works pretty well.
On the gender issue, what it boils down to is don't do anything different or patronizing, because that feels demeaning. On the other issue, just try and hope your old skills come back to you.
It is about me when you throw it in my face. If you are going to do it, just do it and don't say anything about it. I responded to your post because there were things I wanted to add to it for the OP. No need to use that as an excuse to remind me that you don't like me very much.
Really?
Don't piss on my foot and tell me it's raining, and don't f$## with me.
Excuse me? You are the one who felt it necessary to rub it in my face, and I have the right to find that unpleasant. If you want to ignore me, guess what? You can ignore me without having to say "By the way, I'm ignoring you".
Sorry, OP; I'm out of the thread now. My bad, and all.
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Generalizations for the most part don't have a real point when describing players based on their sex. Guys and girls in general act different but that doesn't matter on a individual basis. Know your player not societies stereotype of them. As for the OP I suggest just treating her like you would treat any normal new player. After you see how she plays adjust accordingly. Heath please be more mature and don't start serious flame wars. You've been on the forums long enough to know that fights like these aren't worth the time and effort.
Also, don't be afraid to have enemies take the occasional stupid risk. Sticking to their best attacks and basic tactics can get boring: the party won't remember much about that kind of fight. But the one where one of the hobgoblins swung on a chandelier, wound up falling flat on his back in the middle of the party and spent the rest of the fight stabbing at their knees? They'll remember that one. It's most in-character when A) fighting low-Intelligence critters, B) the monsters figure they're doomed and may as well take crazy risks, or C) the monster is so much stronger that it is deliberately prolonging its "fun".
You know, that's a really good idea. I've never thought about playing enemies like that, but it makes sense.
Any more advice for Onemore? 'Cause I have some.
Onemore - the initiative system is a little intricate and I usually write the order down as it's announced. In pencil, since I find that PCs and NPCs alike sometimes use actions like delaying, readying an action or re-focusing. Having that order written down and in front of you is key to conducting combats fairly efficiently.
Also, don't be afraid to have enemies take the occasional stupid risk. Sticking to their best attacks and basic tactics can get boring: the party won't remember much about that kind of fight. But the one where one of the hobgoblins swung on a chandelier, wound up falling flat on his back in the middle of the party and spent the rest of the fight stabbing at their knees? They'll remember that one. It's most in-character when A) fighting low-Intelligence critters, B) the monsters figure they're doomed and may as well take crazy risks, or C) the monster is so much stronger that it is deliberately prolonging its "fun".
Very good ideas... Exactly what I was looking for! Thanks for your time and effort here, I really appreciate it!
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I'm also kind a a minimalist; re: Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho/shower scene, so kinda glossing over the extreme mayhem fits that.
It's challenging to me.
Oh, and Kelsey,.....I'm still ignoring you.
I trust Spanky's instincts so I am also ignoring Kelsey. Ooo, can I be a minion?!?! I always wanted to be a minion....
On the topic though, I tend to leave out the rape, sexual harassment stuff also just because some people may have issues with it and not wish to discuss it...never really know what raw nerves lie beneath or whether someone had a gropey uncle in their past that they don't want to talk about. Also I have never had a story that really needed that type of stuff in it.
Also after the first adventure I would talk to the players to see what they liked and disliked and offer them a chance to re-roll new PCs of similar wealth and level or stick with what they have already. No need to keep a player stuck in a roll they didn't really know about. It would suck if the new girl wanted to try healer but then realized she wanted to frontline fighter more instead of being the medic.
Just a module specific tip!
** spoiler omitted **
Just a module specific tip!
Ya I've read the module twice now and was thinking the exact same thing! Thanks for the advice...
A tip since you're a new GM, if there's a rule that you're a little bit foggy about, just come up with an adhoc decision to keep the game flowing. Look it up later after the game, not during. Most players care more about the flow and feel of the game than the fact that the GM has every minuscule rule known.
Have you checked out the podcast by the module designers? It's really worth a listen to to prepare for running the story. I can't link it because I am on my phone but it's on the boards if you do a search.
Well, she asked you to take it easy on her. But that should be because she's an inexperienced player, not because she's female.
+1! I'm not going to get bogged down in the sex/gender issue- just listen to your players and craft an experience for each that fits what they are trying to get out of the game. She just may not know yet what she wants- so try to pay attention to what she really enjoys "in game".
