Fergie |
I am starting to remember why I stayed single for those long, long years.
Sorry to hear about all the personal troubles going on right now. People are not supposed to be all bent out of shape this time of year. Maybe some pagan rites of spring will bring everyone together.
Just a quick note to be very careful about that hospital thing. If it is needed, by all means go for it! However it is a very tricky when the doctors can decided if you are allowed to leave or not. Perhaps talking to someone who has been through something similar can aid her in getting help, and avoid saying something that will get her commited against her will.
Also, do your best to keep your own head together despite the craziness going on around you (it sounds like you are). You won't be in the position to help anyone if you get worn out by these things.
Good Luck.
Comrade Anklebiter |
Thank you, comrades.
And good luck, Limey!
In an incredibly ironic stroke, me and Mr. Comrade went to a Take Back the Night rally at UMass Lowell where we held aloft "End White Supremacy" signs and complained about our women being crazy. (In the car, I was all like, "Where's the Black Women Matter sign? Black Incarcerated Lives Matter, Black Children Matter...oh, End White Supremacy? We've got a winner!")
There was an awesome moment when the speaker told the crowd to turn around and start the march. Since we were at the back, they all turned around...and stared at us. We stared back. This went on for a good minute and a half until the CAJE member with us started shouting "End white supremacy! Fight against police brutality!"
Comrade Anklebiter |
** spoiler omitted **
Three threats of suicide last night over a six hour period, followed by "Had an epiphany: You're a horrible person! Screw you, I'm going to live!"
Relieved, but would still have her committed to a hospital if I could. Instead, called all her friends that I knew (not many) to watch out for her. Desperately hope she gets better, but I think moving to Brooklyn and starting a family might be off the agenda.
Can hopefully distract myself with a day full of commie meetings.
Fergie |
Uugghhh! Sounds like a pretty bad situation. I could be wrong, but it seems like she has become very manipulative, (threats and hot/cold behavior) and it won't be doing her any favors to indulge it. Either she is going to feel shame/remorse or encouraged and do it again - bad or bad.
If you can, give yourself a nice long break from the whole situation to get your head together. Be prepared for the opposite behavior, (probably with a good dose of lust involved), as this pattern has probably happened in the past and she has probably used sexy/sweet to regain a sort of control.
It sounds like she has more serious problems then a nice commie goblin can solve. Just be very careful not to enable bad behavior, as this will just get worse and worse for both of you.
EDIT: I just hit the back button and noticed this post from a month ago:
"48 hours of fighting with La Principessa led to tearful reconciliations and mutually amazing phone sex. Relationships are weird."
Not a good pattern.
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Thank you again, comrades.
It's funny how many people have told me that...
(And, to be fair, she warned me about it at the onset of the relationship.)
Anyway, she's out of harm's way for the moment. Had a long, uncomfortable conversation where she explained how she felt and I explained how I felt. Neither of us really accepted full responsibility for the way the night went, but each agreed that each's responses to the other's hostility escalated the situation out of control.
Like, for example, if pressed to highlight one of the moments where I was at fault, I'd point out the time, after a dozen nasty text messages that I ignored and six or seven calls that I refused to answer, I finally answered the phone. (This was before the threats.)
Me: Hello?
Her [dry and emotionless]: Are you out of your f&+*ing mind?
Me: Am I out of my f@#!ing mind? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR F$@&ING MIND?!? [Cuts off her response] ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR F@!@ING MIND?!? [Cuts off response] YES OR NO? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR F!@+ING MIND?!? etc., etc., ad nauseam.
Anyway, I had called one of our comrades in NYC and she coached me on how to get through it. "Think of it like union negotiations..." Not the most romantic sentiment in the world, I admit, but it worked.
More to come later, I'm sure.
Comrade Anklebiter |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Thank you for the update, Citizen Lou.
Went to my Tattoo Artist Former Player and wife's house last night with The Black Goblin and his Pregnant Dreadlocked Libertarian Ex-Welder Girlfriend.
Tattoo Artist presented me with a sheaf of papers, about as thick as a volume of Capital documenting eight years of D&D campaign paperwork--character sheets, maps, inventory lists--and his drawings. He's a pretty talented dude, and I should make some effort to scan them on to the internet, but, anyway, it was amazing and led, inevitably, to talk of putting the band back together...
We're hoping next week and, best of all, I don't have to Dungeon Master!
Huzzah!
Comrade Anklebiter |
Should probably promote this page, too--
Massachusetts Labor Solidarity--
even if it's got a Susan B. Anthony quote blazoned across the top.
Run by Lowell Carpenter dude who we've roped into CAJE.
Man, I love front groups!
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
La Principessa was sad for the next couple of days and then I had an epiphany.
"Baby, uh, when are you having your period?" "Oh, I got it today."
[Facepalm]
You know, she's gotta f#@*ing ap for her smartphone to track this shiznit, I don't why she doesn't use it.
Regardless, that's not really an excuse, but, fortunately for me, she's going to be working 4 hours of overtime a day for the next two weeks to score all those Common Core tests she despises so much. Should buy me some time to decompress.
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Love Among the Ultra-Lefts
Had an altercation while she was here. She wouldn't go to The New Jim Crow reader's circle discussion with me, even though a) she's just read the book; and, b) I always go to everything with her when I'm in NYC. In addition, she had been dropping hints about the Maoist-Inclined Independent Red Historian Rival for Her Affections (Since Vanquished) in a futile attempt to make me jealous.
So, I went to the reader's circle, got drunk, and came home and decided to try to make her jealous. Not the best idea, in retrospect, but it seemed liked a good idea at the time.
Anyway, I said some stuff, I won't go into it, but it centered on how I wanted to sleep with everybody at the meeting (except Mr. Comrade), etc., etc. She got really mad, I got penitent, she calmed down and went into "taking care of hurt child" mode, which, I've noticed, is a great way to get her to stop being mad at me. I just pretend to cry.
Anyway, it worked for a while, but as the next day dragged on, I could tell she was brooding over it, and it finally came out while I was helping The Black Goblin's Pregnant Dreadlocked Libertarian Ex-Welder Girlfriend move into the Free NH Goblin Breeding Caves.
I was subjected to a harangue about how some of the things I had said evinced a poor understanding of the oppression of women, women don't exist to gratify men's sexual needs, etc., etc. I thought she was overdoing it, but I pouted, and pretended to cry and eventually said some stuff about how immersion in this big, bad world can wear down even the most dedicated communist, etc., etc. She instantly stopped being mad and then went on and on about how much she loved me and no one else would ever have such conversations with her without getting angry. Then she started crying. [Shakes head] Women.
Anyway, next morning, we're lazing in bed, I start rubbing up against her, she starts rubbing up against me, I say, "You know, I know that women don't exist simply to gratify men's sexual needs, but..." She freezes, bites her lip in anticipation and manages a "Uh huh," before I roughly grab her knee and continue "But you exist to gratify all my needs," and strike. At which point she flushes bright red, gasps, and starts shaking.
Comrade Anklebiter |
And better bookmark this here so I don't forget:
Left Forum 2015 Registration -- Early Bird
"Early Bird discounts end the 22nd!" he says, to himself.
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Four days after threatening to kill herself, La Principessa thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I had to hurry up and make a decision about whether I wanted to father children with her.
Told her to call me after overtime where I was going to call the whole thing off, but she had, apparently, talked to her therapist in between, who had pointed out that she probably didn't need to be thinking of such heady things as children and the future just quite yet.
So, she asked if she could take a break for a few days to which I readily agreed because I didn't feel like pulling the whole "No, I don't want to have children with a woman who just threatened to kill herself" card.
We'll see how this plays out, but, as it is, I think I'm going to have to break up with her.
[Male pig]I wonder if I can get her in bed one last time?[/Male pig]
Fergie |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
The answer to her question is "Sorry, but NO!" Hormonal disruption, financial stress and a lack of sleep have never improved any relationship in the history of life on Earth.
The answer to your question is "Go for it!" [high fives Doodlebug with hoof]
I should be encouraging you to break it off completely, as that is the only sensible thing. The stakes are too high to mess around. But you two seem compatible in other ways, so there may be some option for friends with benefits...
No. It's too emotionally sketchy.
But... if there were ground rules...
It will only end in heartbreak for one or both of you...
What if...
No. Just NO!
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Yeah, I know...
Hiding behind sex-obsessed pervert mode because otherwise I'd just be filling the thread with gobbo tears and what fun is that?
Besides, IIRC, the last time we had sex she climaxed seven times. I don't think it gets any better than that, unless, of course, I climaxed seven times, but that sounds kind of scary...
Comrade Anklebiter |
Fergie |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
As miserable as it may be now, you are sparing yourself a highly likely much worse situation down the line. My friend from childhood hooked up with a woman who had many issues similar to what you have mentioned. Really, really, eerily similar. She was even a New York school teacher (upstate NY, not NYC). Anyway, after about a year of fights/makeup sex, things really hit the fan bad. State trooper visits, restraining orders, bad stuff. By that point they had several pets, a just purchased house full of furniture, and my friend was left with the rapidly depreciating diamond ring, thousands in credit card debt, and a mortgage. He had also lost over 20 pounds (not in a good way) and had developed a drinking problem.
I'm sorry for the way things are turning out, but it is so, sooo, sooooo much better, quicker, and less painful then it would be in the future!
Perhaps the best breakup song ever
Patrick Curtin |
Bitter Misogyny
Sweet Divine Flumph comrade. That was perfect. I needed that laugh. And I will second the above sentiment. Better now than farther down the road. I'm looking at losing everything right now and starting over at advanced middle age. Not fun dude, not fun...
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
(Once again, thank you, comrades.)
But, but, but....love!
Alright, so now my obstinate contrarian side is acting up and somebody better make a case for doing whatever it takes to keep her or else I'll be applying at UPS in Queens come Monday.
Here are the last three texts she sent last night before commencing "taking a break."
[Types out for catharsis]
#1
#2
#3
We can make this work!!!!
[Collapses sobbing on the floor]
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:Bitter MisogynySweet Divine Flumph comrade. That was perfect.
I showed it to La Principessa when she was up here. She blushed, then laughed, then shared it with all of her friends on Facebook.
Didn't stop her from doing it two days later, though...
Patrick Curtin |
Patrick Curtin wrote:Don Juan de Doodlebug wrote:Bitter MisogynySweet Divine Flumph comrade. That was perfect.I showed it to La Principessa when she was up here. She blushed, then laughed, then shared it with all of her friends on Facebook.
Didn't stop her from doing it two days later, though...
*sigh*
It never does
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Maintained radio silence for 35 hours before breaking down and sending her a quick message about how sad I was and how I hoped she was doing well.
Got this back in return:
I know it's making you sad, and I'm sorry. But sometimes we have to do things that hurt to get to better things. I need to stop hurting, and I finally feel like I can make some progress without the crushing guilt of bringing you into the pain and watching you slowly unravel.
We will talk soon. I just need this time. I love you.
My resolve is already crumbling, comrades. I knew stat-dumping my Wisdom (6) would come back to bite me in the ass...
Comrade Anklebiter |
But, thankfully, there's always communism.
With the exciting news about the ILWU, we are trying to transform our low-wage worker May Day protest into something the whole group can rally behind. New Jim Crow discussion tonight, CAJE meeting on Saturday, then all week to build.
In addition, learned one of the two SNCC speakers coming to UMass this Thursday is the author of This Nonviolent Stuff'll Get You Killed: How Guns Made the Civil Rights Movement Possible.
Here's one of his previous articles I posted a whiles back:
Guns and the Southern Freedom Struggle: What’s Missing When We Teach About Nonviolence
Finish the Civil War!
For black liberation through socialist revolution!
Vive le Galt!!!
Limeylongears |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Comradely sympathies, DA.
A cathartic, i.e. completely unhelpful, message from Uncle Todd
Mind you, he's got a sleeveless tiger-print top and a very small ballerina dancing on top of his piano, so he's alright, the object.
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
Have spoken with her all of twenty minutes since Wednesday night. It's weird. Usually I have to recharge my phone every day, but not since Wednesday. Hmmm.
A couple of Facebook messages, including one of her saying "There Is a Light That Never Goes Out" is the co-dependent's anthem.
I don't know what she's talking about. "To die by your side, well the pleasure, the privilege is mine."
Comrade Anklebiter |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Played some D&D last night, though. I dug out The Mad Hermit and played a solo bit where I saved a farmer's wife from marauding goblins, went to a druid's convention in the Big City, and made friends with some starving kobolds, while waiting to hear from The River.
The other two players got killed by dire rats in the Catacombs of the Black Vatican and have to make new characters before the party's even come together. My players still suck!
Usagi Yojimbo |
Comradely sympathies, DA.
A cathartic, i.e. completely unhelpful, message from Uncle Todd
Mind you, he's got a sleeveless tiger-print top and a very small ballerina dancing on top of his piano, so he's alright, the object.
Limey, that is a fantastically ugly man. My eyes hurt now.
Usagi Yojimbo |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Have spoken with her all of twenty minutes since Wednesday night. It's weird. Usually I have to recharge my phone every day, but not since Wednesday. Hmmm.
:(
At least you know it isn't because you screwed something up?
It may be a good song sign, for your health, at least, that she is working on things by herself for a few days.
Kajehase |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
You're God's comic, Limey. As for your question:
It's working for the goon squad at the vanity factory, doing your best to let it dangle (but not in front of Veronica).
Alas, I have to dash as Jackson's, Monk & Rowe have set Oliver's Army on me (I blame it on Cain), but as long as the birds will still be singing I'm not angry at all this useless beauty.
Comrade Anklebiter |
In a rare bit of good news, it turns out it will only take one thousand dollars to get my car road-worthy. (There goes my tax refund.)
On the other hand, I received a letter from the union saying I took too many days off to go wooing a crazy chick in Brooklyn and will have to pay $450 to maintain my health insurance.
[Goes to wallow in more Morrissey]
Don Juan de Doodlebug |
[Ends up wallowing in Declan MacManus instead]
"I don't wanna be your lover/I just wanna be your victim"
"You say I've got no feelings/Well, this is a good way to kill them"
Been a while since I listened to This Year's Model. Damn, that's a fine album.
Comrade Anklebiter |
Went to a talk of former SNCC activists, my front group got a webpage (beginning stages, comrades, please don't judge quite yet), La Principessa has been good for over 24 hours (phone sex twice, please, comrades, don't judge) AND it's the 40th anniversary of the Fall of Saigon?
Today was a good day.