Granted! You are so funny that nobody ever pays attention when you're trying to get a message across. When you order a big mac, the employee starts howling with laughter and completely misses your order, saying "that's hilarious..."
I wish to live forever without aging.
Your wish is granted. You do not age because every cell in your body in cancerous. The resulting cancer produces enough telomerase that you have stopped aging. The agony is crippling and never-ending.
I wish for an ample supply of Halloween candy, both to eat and to hand out.
Granted. You will have a "sorry, wrong number" phone call in a few minutes. That should make you just a tiny bit less bored while it lasts.
I wish gran rey de los monos got DM Barcas' pile of multiplying candy in his house instead.
granted. the sugar rush from gran rey de los monos eating all that candy enters your blood stream gran re de los mono, giving you the ultimate sugar rush.
i wish i was a polygamist.
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i wish i was a polygamist.Granted. Unfortunately all 20 of your spouses divorce you and the court rules you must pay alimony to all of them.
I wish I had a million bars of gold tucked safely away in a large bank vault to which I have ready access.
Wish granted ... only unbeknowst to you those gold bars are from WWII nazi gold and anytime you go to try and use them they are taken from you to pay for the victims of the Holocaust.
I wish I had my own genie who was loyal to me.
I wish my XBOX hadn't given me the Red Ring of Death the other day.
Granted! Instead your XBOX gave you ring-wyrm.
I wish I had a bowl of chocolate-chip mint ice-cream.
Granted! Though now that you have the bowl made of ice cream, it quickly melts. Maybe you should have wished to put something in it.
I wish the end would get here soon.
Granted: you justspoiled the mystery for everyone!
I wish I was in Scotland right now.
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I wish I was in Scotland right now.
Granted. You are in Scotland. You are in Scotland at a depth of about 100 feet. Your body is found centuries from now by a BBC Archeology show and your appearance at an undisturbed level far removed from that of your archaic dress spawns numerous papers and theories. Ultimately, you are determined to be a hoax and your remains are just tossed in the bin. In Scotland.
I wish I didn't have to follow up a corruption with a wish.
Your wish is granted. You are now BANNED! from the Paizo boards, and may no longer participate in future wish/corruption followups.
I wish that my Sprint DroidX phone never needs to be charged, and always has full bars and service.
wish granted. your battery overheats and melts a hole. looking around you see multiple bars and a gas station that has a sign that says "full service".
i wish i could fin-
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i wish i could fin-
Granted. You are covered in fins and unable to move. People walk by pointing, whispering "Dear God, what is THAT?!?!"
Unless you meant Finns, in which case you are covered in Finns and unable to move. People walk by pointing, whispering "Dear God, what is THAT?!?!"
I wish I had some more bread like the sunflower cheddar bread I just finished.
Granted. You felt better, now wasn't that nice? Unfortunately, things are back to normal now, but you still have the memory of how feeling better felt, so it all is just a bit more bitter.
I wish to have my wish granted in three posts.
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Alright. Somewhere in the world are three particular fence posts. Your wish is inside the third one. Good luck finding it.
I wish I could call in sick tonight without a guilty conscience.
Your wish is granted in deed you can call in sick without feeling guility becasu you have been fired from your job. Not reason to feel guilty.
I wish I had a new car that functioned and was not stolen and was freely given to me.
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I wish I had a new car that functioned and was not stolen and was freely given to me.
Granted. The new car functions, just not how a car should function. In fact it functions more like a giant blender.
As a result, the car is given to you freely by the dealership after you fill out many legal forms absolving them from any responsibility and renouncing any warranty.
You car never gets stolen, but you do find massive amounts of gore inside it on a regular basis.
However, showing a good bit of common sense, you decide to never ever drive/blend the car.
I wish it were autumn already!! ;)
granted. you look at your computer time and see that it is off by 5 hours. clicking on the settings, you see that the year has been set to 1991, thus making you think back 20 years ago.
-ish a sentence in one post.
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Granted. You now talk in three word single syllable sentences.
I wish to never get sick again, and still be alive.
Your wish is granted you are turned into a living statue you never get sick but you can't move or otherwise interact with your surroundings alive forever stuck as a statue.
I wish I could turn into a great white shark whenever I wanted and then turn back whenever I wanted.
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Your wish is granted, but the information never leaves. You have to think of each previous knowledge thoroughly before you can think about the present knowledge. It will eventually take years before you can answer a question.
I wish I could give all my Halloween candy away so I don't have to eat any of it this year.
Granted. Unfortunately, having completed all your work has only uncovered more things that need to be done.
I wish the Vinland settlements had survived into the modern day, creating an awesome Norse country in Eastern North America.
granted. that cat's b$!&@yness rubs off onto you, only you have the ability to magnify b~~~%yness, so your above and beyond what your cat is, so now the cat seems normal.
i wish it had snowed here in the midwest.