Mine is short, and likely far from the strangest, but it is mine and it is true. Ever since the War of the Dragon Queen came out, there is a certain passage in Mozart's Die Zaubeflöte (The Magic Flute) that I sing, in my highest falsetto: "I am a Bluespawn Godslayer..."
I look forward to reading yours.
Every time a rope is mentioned, no matter how significantly, someone quotes Boondock saint. "You and your f'ing rope".
For some reason I am in love with Judy Garland, and could watch the wizard of oz on repeat like 20 times, and not get tired of it.
Back in High School, I DM'd for a group of five players who, whenever the magic user would cast a Fireball spell, would all chant "Fireball! Fireball! Fireball!" in an obvious imitation of Revenge of the Nerds.
I play MEGS, which has a move called "Last Ditch Defense." One of my High School friends (who was also the player of the magic user in the previous story) consistently called it "Last B---- Defense."
G.U.R.P.S. Martial Arts
Power Blow
Enough said.
Mighty blow! Mighty blow!
I know that AC usually means air conditioning.
But my brain automatically thinks "armor class" first.
Last sunday My group ran into the dreaded Ole Red a fiendish T-rex. We lost our monk, I was the cleric. I stayed behind to slow the monster down. The party escaped into the folding boat and I was going to cast water walk and "Run Like Hell" when they got clear. Stupid T-rex AoO my butt and disrupted my spell with 32 damage. The mage summoned a Hound Archon. He dropped me for the hound I manged to cast a Spiritual weapon. Water walk was my only chance, so I prepared to sell my life in blood. When my spiritual scored a mighty crit(20). Our DM uses the Crit Deck and the card read "Throat Slash" target gains bleed and can't breathe or speak until healed. No breathe means drowning I might have still died but Ole Red was coming with me. I stood up and prepared prepare to... WATCH THAT DINO WUSS RUN INTO THE JUNGLE. I'm killing the crap out of Red and I going to make boots out of him.
Remember if you can't win make the other guy sorry he started the fight and never admit to luck. I had Ole Red right where I wanted him...Bleeding freely from his throat.
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@Mr. Fishy
Since Ole Red has bleed until healed, and he can't breathe, haven't you already killed him?
I have a Dire Werewolf Gestalt Druid/Barbarian. His battlecry has become "For the squirrels!"
Stupid protean scourge mage blew up half of his forest critter army. So, following the surviving scourges to their base camp, I had him bring a legion of mice. Once night had fallen, he gave each mouse a fire seed(holly berry bomb) and told them to place each one throughout the camp. The command word to set them off? "For the squirrels!"
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Pithy quotes.
The ones that spring to mind:
"It had hay in it..." spoken by an animal companion horse, about something scatological.
"We love you!" said in a slight falsetto, like the Kobolds from "The Red Dragon Interview" Also from that source, "Yum yum YUMMY!"
Those are the ones that come up now. If I think of more, I'll post.
I know that AC usually means air conditioning.
But my brain automatically thinks "armor class" first.
I can only wonder what happens when a player comes in, complaining that his/her AC is broken...
About a year ago, a group of us were playing in an Eberron campaign and one of the players was a gnome bard. At one moment, he was swaying from side to side in his seat and someone asked what he was doing.
He replied, I'm a metrognome.
Guffaws ensued.
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About a year ago, a group of us were playing in an Eberron campaign and one of the players was a gnome bard. At one moment, he was swaying from side to side in his seat and someone asked what he was doing.
He replied, I'm a metrognome.
Guffaws ensued.
...
The hurting... make it stop...
That one had an Area modifier, as it struck my wife and hurt her too.
About a year ago, a group of us were playing in an Eberron campaign and one of the players was a gnome bard. At one moment, he was swaying from side to side in his seat and someone asked what he was doing.
He replied, I'm a metrognome.
Guffaws ensued.
...
The hurting... make it stop...
That one had an Area modifier, as it struck my wife and hurt her too.
The metrognome is great.
I'm a little surprised we haven't gotten more contributions, 'cause we all know we are strange. Are folks away for the holidays, or just being shy?
Give it up!
Things are often calculated in 'hit points' such as...
In the province of Quebec, you need to go through a 2-year probationary period with a temporary driver's license before you can obtain your (full-fledged) driver's license. This temporary license is less permissive and only has 10 hit points instead of 15...
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We, as I imagine many gamers do, will often make references to our hobby in public.
"Well, I just blew my Fort save..." after contracting the flu.
"Gorramit, blew my Will save..." when I click purchase on a new Paizo product.
"Bloody fluff! Just failed my DEX check!" when one of us drops or fumbles something, or smacks face first into a door, wall or other sessile object.
"You must have put another rank into Craft(Cooking) sweetie! Dinner's awesome!" Though this one usually takes a WOW flavor, "You gained another rank in Cooking? Awesome!"
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a few years ago, we were playing d20 modern, a kinda monster hunter/buffy campaign. we were still pretty low level, like 1 or 2, when we were attack by the vampire boss who unleased the zombies in the mall. well, we were saved when an el camino slammed into the vamp, introducing our savior/trainer/patron to the story. without missing a beat i uttered "holy s!@#, thay vampire has damage reduction el camino"
I so do the game terms, spot check, will save and so on
The most common thing in our game is anyone casting magic missile always gets a corse of "AT the darkness"
That I I can never use the names "rod of wonder or rod of lordly might" without a bunch or really bad jokes about barmaids holding on to the "Rod of lordly might" or the always useful comeback 'that's what she said"
An no it's not just the guys that do that.
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I also have found myself quoting Gamers: Dorkness Rising a lot. Specifically the line from the outtakes. "If you were a Bard, you could whip it. But you are a Monk so Improved Trip it."
The "... at the darkness" bit, along with other parts of that skit, are common parlance. As is "You must face the gazebo... alone!"
I sometimes quote the Warcraft Tauren silly "Moo, there, I said it... now are you happy?"
Quotes run rampant in our group as well, and same with the "I failed/made my X check/save" statements.
Most of the rest of our catchphrases for gaming are in-jokes regarding stuff that's happened in game. Stuff like a cleric of mine saying "I think-talk to the rock" or my sister-in-law's knight telling a bunch of thieves "Face the just actions of your rewards".
The big one though is a play on something a monk in one party said before tossing smokesticks at halfling rogues (BAD IDEA) and now has become our group's catchphrase for "I'm going to do something stupid": "Hey, I think I have something in my bag/pack/case/etc. to deal with this!"
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My wife has a favorite quote that I've borrowed and use fairly frequently.
"DO. YOU. SPEAK. BIRD?!"
The backstory is that a Gnome Barbarian was always trying to talk to animals, but ended up with the ability to speak with birds. So, would end up asking mammals the aforementioned question.
I've since used it in the context of any character I play speaking with someone with whom they share no common language.
Who Says D&D Doesn't Apply to Real Life?
During one of my taekwondo classes, we were talking about possible real combat scenarios. My instructor asked us "There's one situation were I would voluntarily back myself into a corner..."
FLANKING! I blurted out, much too enthusiastically.
I work in a local library. For a while they had a poster with Garfield on it looking hungrily at a book and the phrase "brains need to eat too" or something like that and I immediately thought of an intellect devourer - after all it's a brain and it does eat.
Another D&D inspired moment was I wa trying to put on a pair of gloves last January I think but I couldn't get the glove on properly. I looked down and realized I was trying to put the left glove on my right hand. So I immediately thought "that's my Rakshasa moment for the day."
Another incident just came to mind, but I chalk it more to the player being quite the neophyte to our beloved game. Our party was in a situation where we were dealing with a hostile NPC and we were desperately trying to gain valuable information and were getting nowhere, our bard (no relation to the metrognome) spoke up and said that he "will attempt to charisma him" [the NPC]. Yes, CHA is an ability score that fuels the diplomacy skill, but the player was still grasping the concept.
Nowadays, when we come across a DM playing a tough / uncooperative NPC, the typical snarky response would be "I charisma him."
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I had players fight go to the aid of a coastal village that was being attacked by giant version of wild life including crabs or other crustaceans. They attacking the village due to the BBEG controlling them. After the BBEG was stopped the party brought back loot and wagons full of the slain creatures for a feast. The neighboring dairy based village made a good profit selling them butter by the wagon load.
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I have a tendency to provide color commentary using game terminology whenever I watch fantasy films and anime. It's like watching a cross between a sports broadcast and MST3K. If you've never done it, you owe it to yourself to sit down with some gamers and watch Record of Lodoss War while providing narration for all the skill checks, saving throws, etc.
Also, Eliminators is basically GURPS come to life.
My wife and I routinely comment that I've made my parking roll when I get a spot close to the entrance of whatever shop we're going to.
Warhammer Fantasy roleplay has the concept of 'fate points' which basically allow you to avoid death (which otherwise comes rather swiftly).
Among my gaming group, when one of use declare that 'I've used a fate point last night' is a serious comment saying that we barely avoided a serious accident or that fate somehow saved us a great deal of trouble.
I remember getting hypnotized by snow and fog while driving . All I remember of that drive (which takes at least 30 minutes) is the two first minutes and turning into the driveway at home. There are at least 3 different routes that I could have taken and I have no recollection of ANYTHING of that drive. I think I used a fate point that night.
'findel
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The mention of parking upthread reminds me.
An erstwhile friend and incredible GM, along with her coterie, inspired in me and my ex the obeisance of a Power known simply as "The Dark Lord of Parking"
In the newly crafted mythos, this Dark Lord is a minor administrative cog in Hell's beauracracy. He is still a Dark Lord, though, and thus has some power over the mortal realm. When one finds a good parking spot, one should (at a volume appropriate to the situation) say "Thank you, Dark Lord!" at which point one appeases this Power and he is pleased with his elevation.
Even if one is forced into a lousy parking spot, one should still thank the Dark Lord, lest he spurn the infidel until proper atonement is offered.
At one point, my wife and I pulled up to our place of residence and I gave thanks. My wife went further than this and offered... services of an adult nature.
Ever since then, instead of saying thank you, I just say "Put it on her tab" and the miracles of the Dark Lord remain potent and plentiful.
And it is thus that I share the love of the Dark Lord of parking with the masses, so that they may increase his power and bask in the benefits thereof.
Hail, Oh Mighty Dark Lord of Parking!
Ia Ia Ia!
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Warhammer Fantasy roleplay has the concept of 'fate points' which basically allow you to avoid death (which otherwise comes rather swiftly).
Among my gaming group, when one of use declare that 'I've used a fate point last night' is a serious comment saying that we barely avoided a serious accident or that fate somehow saved us a great deal of trouble.
I remember getting hypnotized by snow and fog while driving . All I remember of that drive (which takes at least 30 minutes) is the two first minutes and turning into the driveway at home. There are at least 3 different routes that I could have taken and I have no recollection of ANYTHING of that drive. I think I used a fate point that night.
'findel
Hmm, I've had similar situations, especially when driving in snow. Glad you made it through that. Fate points are, in fact, VERY powerful.
We have a shop here in town called D&D Body Repair & Painting. Every time I pass it I have the nearly overwhelming urge to go in with the sheet of a dead character and an unpainted minature and ask for a quote on a resurrection spell and a paint job.
@Mr. Fishy
Since Ole Red has bleed until healed, and he can't breathe, haven't you already killed him?Named monsters don't bleed out unless you watch I guess. I wanted to chase that big red coward into yhe jungle. He was all bad until I opened his throat. I got lung pierced and our sorceress lost a hand, ok, the sorceress cried, but I was stone. I fear not the Crit for I'M CLERIC...HEALBOMB!!
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One of my players once came across what I told him was a refuse bin in the caverns below a mansion. When he asked what its contents looked like, I told him "fecal matter". He then asked what did it smell like. The answer was the same, then he had his Ftr touch it, "What does it feel like?". After getting the same response..... he then asked "What does it taste like?". None of us knew how to respond, so I said once again "Fecal Matter!". After a moment of thought he looked at me and said "I give up, what is it." :/
EUUUUUUUURGHHH!! That belongs in the stupid stuff thread methinks... *uuuuuuuuuuuugh*
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Re: Mac Boyce... That's ALWAYS the right answer.
Re: Tarren Dei... Now THAT is the geeky way to burglar proof your office. (Though I'd be tempted to break in, roll it to 1, and leave a note "This was my stealth check... but there was no one around to oppose it...")
Re: Moorluck... Ewwwww! Just... ewwww!
My friend and fellow gamer worked for a dominos pizza. I don't know if it is the franchise or the local owner, but he had a t-shirt that had the initials of the company that owned it on the breast. National Pizza Company. NPC.
I once played a pretty mercenary and evil bard in a game. He was drug on an adventure to help the populace of the local town by his much more charitable companions. They came back to the inn they had been staying in only to find that the local wererat thieves guild had started it on fire. He had finally had enough. He told the paladin in the group in no uncertain terms that he was NOT going to join a bucket brigade. It was simply beneath him to do that kind of manual labor. The paladin convinced him with just five simple words.
"Our gold is in there."
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About a month ago I was dealing with an account that had a german roach problem, now the key to dealing with these critters is locating the source. So after about 15 minutes of being there, I find the harborage area, under the dishwasher behind some loose wall board. The manager looked at me very strangly when I proclaimed... "Natural twenty baby!". :/
I know that AC usually means air conditioning.
But my brain automatically thinks "armor class" first.
In a similar vein, there's an empty lot near my house with a for sale sign advertising its size, approx. 13 acres.
It says ±13 AC.
Every time we drive by it, my fiance has to say something about how the large field grants such a great bonus to armor class. :)