The Thread Celestial

[Celestial Follower]

Oh wow, I hope I didn't cause that...

[Gentleman Nurn]

Yeeeesssss.

[Celestial Healer]

CF, I gave you the credit card info to contact a guru. So what is this charge from 1-900-TURNIPTITS?

[Celestial Follower]

Well, that's an interesting acronym. I never paid attention to that.

It stands for Turnip Terrier Indigenous Transplantation System.

You see, I wanted to get Planting Dogs for my turnips.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

{launches Oregon Trail Maps website on Banana Jr. 6000} Hmmm, still no local BonChon... {excitedly} but there is a new UpChuck(tm) franchise that just opened a couple blocks away!

And they're running a special: order two pieces of ICan'tBelieveIt'sAFewChromosomesAwayFromChicken(tm) and a 16oz crab juice, and get free sides of mashed turnips, turnip slaw, and an extra-strength xantac!

[Gentleman Nurn]

So that's what CF put in my drink.

[Celestial Healer]

I didn't know CF did cocktails. I am not optimistic about them.

[Gentleman Nurn]

Neither did I.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

As long as he doesn't skimp on the blessed alcohol, I'm sure it'll be fine. {levitates unsteadily into the kitchen for another mimosa}

[Celestial Follower]

My Harmy Bangwallers are planar famous.

[Celestial Healer]

Dare I ask what is in them?

[Celestial Follower]

Pinrut juice is the main ingredient.

[Gentleman Nurn]

*suspicious eyebrow raise*

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

CF, your Pikmin Sangria is also quite refreshing!

[Celestial Healer]

I'm pretty sure CF read the label on the "pinrut juice" in a mirror.

[Celestial Follower]

I can't see anything in a mirror, boss. Remember that gypsy curse?

I really shouldn't have hit her with my celestial shopping cart...

[Celestial Healer]

It didn't help that when she called you out on it, you called her a skank and hit her with a sack of turnips.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Well, it was her own fault being a skank. Probably wasn't the best timing, but CF isn't a liar.

Thankfully, she didn't manage to get off a curse of lyskankthropy hex.

[Celestial Healer]

Celestial Thaumoctopus wrote:

Well, it was her own fault being a skank. Probably wasn't the best timing, but CF isn't a liar.

Thankfully, she didn't manage to get off a curse of lyskankthropy hex.

I'm not so sure about that. Did you get a look at that tube top CF is wearing?

[Cr500cricket]

You allow Infernal here, how about abyssal?

[Gentleman Nurn]

We can be flexible, yeeeessss.

[Cr500cricket]

Sweet!

[Celestial Follower]

I can't help it if I'm going through my tube top-juggalo phase.

[Celestial Follower]

Plus I was really sad that I bruised all those turnips.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

F!%!ing turnips, how do they work?

[WitchyTangles]

*Skips through juggling turnips*

!!!!!!!POODLES!!!!!

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

{shrieks in terror, squeezes under couch to hide}

[Celestial Healer]

Cr500cricket wrote:

You allow Infernal here, how about abyssal?

We allow what? Wait, since when?

Would everybody who is not Lawful Good please raise your hand?

[Gentleman Nurn]

*does not raise hand*

Bluff: 1d20 + 38 ⇒ (18) + 38 = 56

[WitchyTangles]

I'm only a little bit not lawful good but I make good cookies =D

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

{from under couch:} I don't have hands.

[Celestial Healer]

Those answers are good enough for me!

I'm pretty sure I'm still Lawful Good myself, although I seem to have lost my knack for converting prepared spells into Cures...

[Gentleman Nurn]

It happens, yeeesssss.

[Celestial Follower]

I'm Lawful Tur...Good.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Spontaneous cures?! That's real? Huh. The best I've been able to do is convert spells into create alcoholic beverages.

{sips Midnight Isles Iced Tea} Mind you, I'm not complaining.

[Cr500cricket]

*raises hand*

[Brownchickenbrowncow]

I'm illegal in 37 states

[Celestial Healer]

Cr500cricket wrote:

*raises hand*

Ha! That's a good one. I love a paladin with a sense of humor.

[Celestial Healer]

Celestial Thaumoctopus wrote:

Spontaneous cures?! That's real? Huh. The best I've been able to do is convert spells into create alcoholic beverages.

{sips Midnight Isles Iced Tea} Mind you, I'm not complaining.

Yes, well, we won't talk about what you did to Mary Tyler Moore the last time I asked for a "Bloody Mary".

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Celestial Healer wrote:

Celestial Thaumoctopus wrote:

Spontaneous cures?! That's real? Huh. The best I've been able to do is convert spells into create alcoholic beverages.

{sips Midnight Isles Iced Tea} Mind you, I'm not complaining.

Yes, well, we won't talk about what you did to Mary Tyler Moore the last time I asked for a "Bloody Mary".

It was her fault for picking a safeword in Dark Speech. The ottoman and stuffed peacock had both been scotchguarded, so the stains all came out. And the polymorph wore off after a week.

[Celestial Healer]

It's all bloody water under the bridge at this point. Now who are we sacrificing this week?

[Gentleman Nurn]

It's the new guy's turn, yeeesssss.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

Looks like Crom got upset for us wanting to sacrifice Conan, so the Nirvana Beadledom Cabal canceled it... but I bet we could get Leno to fill in if we asked.

[Cr500cricket]

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

It's the new guy's turn, yeeesssss.

Watch it bud.

[Gentleman Nurn]

Cr500cricket wrote:

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

It's the new guy's turn, yeeesssss.

Watch it bud.

I am, yeeesssss. With all five eyes, even.

[Cr500cricket]

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

Cr500cricket wrote:

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

It's the new guy's turn, yeeesssss.

Watch it bud.

I am, yeeesssss. With all five eyes, even.

I'm not a red shirt I don't have to die.

[Celestial Healer]

That's what all the sacrifices say.

[Celestial Healer]

Yesterday was the equinox. Were the proper sacrifices made? Last time we missed a sacrifice, I got a rash.

[Celestial Follower]

I sacrificed a dozen rutabagas!

[Celestial Follower]

They were big rutabagas, too. Each one must have weighed a pound at least.