General Jack smiles
I was prepared for this contingency. I leave one obvious choice and you take it...
Pulls out pocket Jackapult and launches poodle into the celestial thread.I CAN FLY!
*turns around in midair to throw "landmines" at the General*
oops. Looks like Jackskunk ate a bad poodle.
*hands out some more beers to the Jacks*
See? We can be friends.
*hands out some more beers to the Jacks*
See? We can be friends.
*Suddenly, in an old forest, miles away, a call is heard...a call that there is poisonous beer. This call enrages our hero, who flies in through the planes to save the day, and the skunk...*
SUPER PLANTJACK!*Removes poison from Jackskunk and smashes beers*
I am back! Did anybody miss me?
*hands out some more beers to the Jacks*
See? We can be friends.
Beer, or acid again?
Jacks prefer fawning worhippers to friends. Or you could be slaves, to be sacrificed when the Callous Jack Monument is sealed.
I am back! Did anybody miss me?
I didn't.
*hands out some more beers to the Jacks*
See? We can be friends.
*Suddenly, in an old forest, miles away, a call is heard...a call that there is poisonous beer. This call enrages our hero, who flies in through the planes to save the day, and the skunk...*
SUPER PLANTJACK!
*Removes poison from Jackskunk and smashes beers*
I am back! Did anybody miss me?
Oh crap! You slaadi are in real trouble now. You shouldn't of oughta messed with the god's nectar like that.
Get 'em, PlantJack!
I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't.
That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*
Ambrosia likes the Jacks better than you guys!Ambrosia likes everyone like that!{telepathically contacts thread combatants:} HEY! I went visiting in the Jack thread because 1) I thought I could make a few friends and mend fences between the Jacks and Slaadi, 2) they have Jills there, and 3) they have a pool.
Harsh man, just harsh.... :DI'm not sure I have honor, but thanks for defending it.
"My pleasure, Sweets! (And even if you don't have any honor, your assets are definitely worth defending!)"
That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't.
Ouch!
I don't got into your threads and start throwing people around! Although I appreciate the chaos of it...
Yes... Yes indeed. With your chaotic natures, you are slowly becoming slaadi yourselves. I can see it now.
That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't.Ouch!
I don't got into your threads and start throwing people around! Although I appreciate the chaos of it...
Yes... Yes indeed. With your chaotic natures, you are slowly becoming slaadi yourselves. I can see it now.
We were here first, you morons. You're becoming us. Or are you corrupted versions of us or suchwhat? It is difficult to be certain.
*Throws against wall again*
Hmm... a PlantJack.
*snaps fingers*
I've got it!
*spreads arms wide as aphid swarms fly past him at VTPJ*
Fly my pretties, fly, fly!
You're making me angry. And you won't like me when I'm angry.
That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't.Ouch!
I don't got into your threads and start throwing people around! Although I appreciate the chaos of it...
Yes... Yes indeed. With your chaotic natures, you are slowly becoming slaadi yourselves. I can see it now.
We were here first, you morons. You're becoming us. Or are you corrupted versions of us or suchwhat? It is difficult to be certain.
*Throws against wall again*
Well, I did think I was giving birth when I 'processed' all that cheese the other day.
Hmm... a PlantJack.
*snaps fingers*
I've got it!
*spreads arms wide as aphid swarms fly past him at VTPJ*
Fly my pretties, fly, fly!
*Releases cloud of stench which kills aphids*
I think not!
You're making me angry. And you won't like me when I'm angry.
*Tosses slaad again*
There are a lot of walls here. And I think I shall like your anger a great deal. This is boring.
Hmm... a PlantJack.
*snaps fingers*
I've got it!
*spreads arms wide as aphid swarms fly past him at VTPJ*
Fly my pretties, fly, fly!*Releases cloud of stench which kills aphids*
I think not!
Animate Undead Swarm! Bolster Undead!
Fly again, fly! AHAHAHAHA!!!!!
*in a rage, Tossed Slaad begins to tremble and shake, his body contorts until he becomes...*
I told you you wouldn't like it when I'm angry.
Hmm... a PlantJack.
*snaps fingers*
I've got it!
*spreads arms wide as aphid swarms fly past him at VTPJ*
Fly my pretties, fly, fly!*Releases cloud of stench which kills aphids*
I think not!Animate Undead Swarm! Bolster Undead!
Fly again, fly! AHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Excellent! A challenge!
*Releases another cloud. Oddly enough, the aphids are still affected*Oh, right. It's blessed by angels. Nice!
*calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
I told you you wouldn't like it when I'm angry.
Oh sh**.
This raid is going sour.
*calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
*Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries*
*Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ*
*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
I am immune. I am a golem, do you remember?
*calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
That's chaotic! He expected you to shoot him in the back.
They're scared, Jacks! They had to call in normals.
Dials Acme Weapons Division up on his phone and orders surface-to-air-missiles.
Trucks arrive quickly and drop off crates marked 'Agricultural Equipment'. JH opens the 1st one and fires at a helicopter.
I am immune. I am a golem, do you remember?*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
*mercenaries prepare atomic bomb*
The general pulls his right hand off, revealing a Vulcan machine gun.
Now to mow down some merc bums!
sprays hot lead
Excellent! A challenge!
*Releases another cloud. Oddly enough, the aphids are still affected*
Oh, right. It's blessed by angels. Nice!
Hm.
*thinks*Mass Greater Polymorph!
*turns aphids into abberations that aren't affected by cloud effects*
Fly yet again!
*secretly sends giant worms to attack from below*
The Jacks should leave now, or I'm levelling the entire Off-Topic Discussions forum! And I'm just crazy enough to do it!
Salty calls for naval support
Hey? You guys think you could keep the skies clear for us? We're trying to have a simple little ground war here.
*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
Shadow Jumps in. Brandishes Nobel Peace Prize like a holy symbol in front of Dick Cheney, then clubs him over the head with it to 'Turn' him. Shadow Jumps out.
The Jacks should leave now, or I'm levelling the entire Off-Topic Discussions forum! And I'm just crazy enough to do it!
Only Al Gore has that power! (But I do like the scorched earth policy.)
Surrender Slaadi! Acknowledge the Jacks as your Masters and we shall set the terms of your tribute!
*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
Shadow Jumps in. Brandishes Nobel Peace Prize like a holy symbol in front of Dick Cheney, then clubs him over the head with it to 'Turn' him. Shadow Jumps out.
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.
Shadow Jumps back in. Slaps Hello Kitty bandaid on Dick Cheney, healing his wound, but nauseating him with the power of chibi. Shadow Jumps out.
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries**calls in a fleet of mercenaries who arrive via Blackhawk helicopter and open fire on the jacks*
*shoots Egg Slaad in the face*
Oh, sorry about that, buddy.
Shadow Jumps in. Brandishes Nobel Peace Prize like a holy symbol in front of Dick Cheney, then clubs him over the head with it to 'Turn' him. Shadow Jumps out.
*Holds jug of holy water*
Back! Back!
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.Shadow Jumps back in. Slaps Hello Kitty bandaid on Dick Cheney, healing his wound, but nauseating him with the power of chibi. Shadow Jumps out.
Hey, pull my finger.
My finger of death, b@&+*.
*casts disintegrate on VTPJ*
{Wanders in, takes in the Chaos[/i} Yes! {[i]and takes in the horrors of war} No. NO. NOOOOO!
{notices rubble crushing Cobb Spider's home} Are you OK Cobbie? Cobbie? {cannot find him} NOOOOOO!...
*casts disintegrate on VTPJ*
That provokes an attack of opprotunity, Dick Cheney.
*Smacks former VP. Spell fails*
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.Shadow Jumps back in. Slaps Hello Kitty bandaid on Dick Cheney, healing his wound, but nauseating him with the power of chibi. Shadow Jumps out.
Hey, pull my finger.
My finger of death, b&#%%.
Shadow Jumps in.
Atomic Wedgie
"Hey Ambrosia? What's say we blow this sandbox and head back to the party? The crowd's much more entertaining there (and easier on the eye too)!"
Shadow Jumps out.
{rather expensive latex catsuit splits and tears, yet somehow enough remains to cover naughty bits}
I am immune. I am a golem, do you remember?
{gamma punts him back to Jack thread}
*casts disintegrate on VTPJ*That provokes an attack of opprotunity, Dick Cheney.
*Smacks former VP. Spell fails*
I was casting it defensively.
Surrender Slaadi! Acknowledge the Jacks as your Masters and we shall set the terms of your tribute!
{gamma pounds JH into the dirt}
Surrender Slaadi! Acknowledge the Jacks as your Masters and we shall set the terms of your tribute!{gamma pounds JH into the dirt}
NOW!!!
*giant worms pull JH underground*
The general pulls his right hand off, revealing a Vulcan machine gun.
Now to mow down some merc bums!
sprays hot lead
Eekster hate men with guns! {smushes his gun attachment, gamma pimp-slaps him}
Salty calls for naval support
Hey? You guys think you could keep the skies clear for us? We're trying to have a simple little ground war here.
You look like General Ross- {advances menacingly}
*wanders back into the thread*
Someone told me there was a party going on here. I brought my bongos!
*wanders back into the thread*
Someone told me there was a party going on here. I brought my bongos!
{gamma punts him to Dark & Stormy thread}
I was casting it defensively.*casts disintegrate on VTPJ*That provokes an attack of opprotunity, Dick Cheney.
*Smacks former VP. Spell fails*
Aha! You didn't state that you were casting defensively!