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I am that player. I'm autistic and I also have really bad adhd, so I forget stuff, my attention drifts and I lose my train of thought a lot. I also have at least two other players with learning disabilities. One of them has dyscalculia and literally can't do math.Your three minute rule sounds useful, although in my case I might extend it to 5 minutes, see how that works out and adjust accordingly.
My group also plays over skype chat and roll20.net, an online tabletop software.
EDIT: On second thought, I might just keep it 3, see how well that works out, and...
The compromise is that the have 2 minutes to talk through and clarify what went before and start their actions, then 3 minutes to complete.
To be clear, it isn't done to penalise, but in a table with 7 players around, it's no fun for anyone to only get one turn every 30 minutes at best. So it gets players to think before their turn, or graciously defer to the next player (a little like readying an action) to keep the action going.
The notepads help for the subsequent sessions too as I'm often keeping track of three different simultaneous parties- not recommended for this old DM with fading powers of recollection.