Animus Duplicate

Dire Quote Mangler's page

38 posts. Alias of Ambrosia Slaad.


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Woran wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
My mind works like a toaster. I put in a task. I forget about it. Eventually my mind completes the tasks startling even around.
Mmmmm toast

"YEAH, TOAST!" [/HeywoodBanks]

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I'm Hiding In My Closet wrote:
Obstetrician!! The attorney is clearly leading the horse to Faygo, and not letting it twerk!

In Soviet Russia, closet hides in you!

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Woran wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:

High Schooler: So, when we're done with this part of the job, you want us to get some mulch?

The Boss: Well yes, it's not going to just fall from the sky

Me: That would be pretty cool if it did!

...Just so long as you weren't standing directly underneath.
I should note everyone looked up when it was said.
Cant blame them. Its been that kind of year.

What is happening around here today? Are gringos falling from the sky?!

Sharoth wrote:
I am Blinded by the Light!!!

Are you certain?

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Vidmaster 1st edition wrote:
*shudder* palladium ain't no one got time for that.

Hell, Palladium damn near killed Tony Stark in Iron Man 2.

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"Works on contingency.?

No, money down.!"

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Pyromaniac wrote:
Vanykrye wrote:
The only reasonable solution is arson.
I support this product and/or service.

"Anytime I had a problem and I threw a Molotov cocktail, boom! Right away, I had a different problem." - Jason Mendoza

Blue Horsechip loves Apricot Peels.

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Scintillae wrote:

..."Yeah. And then July and August happened. So seven-eight-nine-ten are now nine-ten-eleven-twelve, but they kept the names."

"That's stupid. Rome is stupid."

"All right, but apart from that, what have the Romans ever done for us?"

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10) "It's pronounced BOO-kay."

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Elrond voiceover: "I led Isildur deep into the fires of Mount Doom, where the Ring was forged, the one place it could be destroyed."

Elrond: "Cast it into the fire! Destroy it!"

Isildur: "No." {smiles evilly, walks away}

Elrond: "ISILDUR!!!" {sighs wearily} "F*ck."

Selene Spires wrote:
I need more questions!!!

What good is seeing eye chocolate?

What good's a computerized nose?

What good is rain that falls up?

What good's a disease that won't hurt you?

What good are these thoughts that I'm thinking?

What good's this lion that barks?

2 people marked this as a favorite.
90s Simpsons Referotron wrote:
“I’m cold and there are wolves after me.”

“Love is a snowmobile* racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.”

* Apologies to Cole Deschain.

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Yqatuba wrote:
A succubus, right before changing into her true form "excuse my while I slip into something more comforable."

The judges would also accept "excuse my while I slip into someone more comfortable."

TriOmegaZero wrote:

Champion of Irori: Tell us what you know and we will let you go.

Death Cultist: But why? Death comes to us all. It will come for you, and come for me, to the great glory of our lord!

Party: tell us what you know and we will kill you instead?

Death Cultist: Oh joy! How will you do it? Strangulation, poisoning, or just simple stabbing? The classics are classic for a reason!

"I will kill you until you die from it."

When you stare into the Abyss... realize it's just filled with an infinity of unrealized Captain Yesterday aliases.

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The beatings will continue until Marketing improves.

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gran rey de los mono wrote:
When flirting, biting your lower lip can be sexy. Biting your upper lip, however, is just plain weird.

Biting the right lip

gran rey de los mono wrote:
Camping is voluntary, temporary homelessness.

Camping builds character

Limeylongears wrote:
I'm sleeping in Gandalf.

"I... I thought he smelt bad on the outside."

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Well, there's egg and bacon; egg, sausage, and bacon; egg and Farael; egg, bacon, and Farael; egg, bacon, sausage, and Farael; Farael, bacon, sausage, and Farael; Farael, egg, Farael, Farael, bacon, and Farael; Farael, sausage, Farael, Farael, bacon, Farael, tomato, and Farael...

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Thomas Seitz wrote:
Right now I'm still holding off judging stuff until I see the first beta in my hands.

Yeah, as angry as it gets now, just wait until they release the beta fish into the playtest threads. Many Grognards and Optimizers will know what it is to be roasted in the depths of a Dire Beta that day, I can tell you!

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Cuttlefist wrote:
KuniUjito wrote:
Anybody got a tranquilizer? We might need to put cuttlefist down for nappy time
I’ll nappy when i’m Dead!


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Inigo Limeytoya: "You are wonderful."

Man in Period Costume: "Thank you; I've worked hard to become so."

Inigo Limeytoya: "I admit it, you are better than I am."

MiPC: "Then why are you smiling?"

Inigo Limeytoya: "Because I know something you don't know."

MiPC: "And what is that?"

Inigo Limeytoya: "I am not left-handed." {switches sword to his right hand... and begins to yell in severe pain}

Apologies. I hope it's just a light sprain, Limey.

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IDTheftVictim wrote:
Wake up sheeple!

Oh God, oh God, oh God, why did you do that?!

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"Ooooo, guns, guns, guns! C'mon, Sal! The Starfinders are playing... tonight. I never miss a game."

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captain yesterday wrote:
I'm not even sick, I've had a bit of nasal congestion.

Yes, you are -- you'll be stone dead in a moment.

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Scythia wrote:
quibblemuch wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
quibblemuch wrote:
thejeff wrote:
Wouldn't give me much peace of mind to find out when I die that we're all characters in a overelaborate version of The Sims. :)
You know... that would explain that time I was swimming and then the pool ladder disappeared and I couldn't get out and I had to swim around for hours until it reappeared in a totally different part of the pool...
I knew I shouldn't had deleted my earlier "Cask of Amontillado" joke.
More evidence: About 85% of everything I hear or read sounds like Simlish these days... and that ratio is climbing steadily.
Des graw esfredechez, nhooba des na. Eep badu.

Bah-weep-Graaaaagnah wheep ni ni bong?

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{angrily} Newmann!

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That still only counts as one!

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Freehold DM wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:

I liked the first episode.

Better than the Ghost Rider movie. :-)

you deserve to be naked for such apostasy.

CY's two chief weapons are nakedness and apostasy... and a multitude of aliases. His three weapons are nakedness, apostasy, and a multitude of aliases... and an almost fanatical devotion to fluffing unboxed plush animals. His Amongst his weapons...

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Drejk wrote:
DungeonmasterCal wrote:
Well, dang. Gonna miss ya around here.
Check the dates.

"Bad dates"

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Babou wrote:

Sepentine, Babou! SERPENTINE!

Conservative Anklebiter wrote:

*Looks in again, takes a shot of Dr. Pepper, laughs, writes this*

You guys are funny to watch.

"Whaddaya mean we're funny? Funny how? Like funny 'ha ha' or funny strange?"

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JoelF847 wrote:
If it's set after Undiscovered Country, I hope they find a way to have a good Captain Sulu cameo.


Captain Hikaru Sulu: "In range?"
Helmsman Lojur: "Not yet sir."
Sulu: "Come on, come on."
Helmsman: "She'll fly apart!"
Sulu: "Fly her apart then!"

Freehold DM wrote:
Lab_Rat wrote:
Goth Guru wrote:

5. Mark Zuckerburg is the CEO of Facebook, but whoever owns a controlling share of the stock may be controlling the company. Somebody hacked Mark's other accounts, but I had nothing to do with that. If Anonymous had found anything explaining Facebook's weird behaviour, he or she would have made some kind of announcement.
Zuckerberg owns 4 million Facebook Class A shares (1 vote per share) and 468 million Class B shares (10 votes per share), giving him overall voting power of 60% of total voting stock. Zuckerberg controls Facebook.

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Vic Wertz wrote:
Steve Geddes wrote:
I'm hoping it will lure Erik Mona back into AP writing. He's written some of my group's favorite adventures.

{disappointed} Star-Mona, man! The legendary publisher? Guys?

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General Buck Turgidson wrote:
* Edit: Yeah, I know this is a Brigadier General Jack D. Ripper reference/line, but I'm trying to avoid creating a third Strangelove alias.

You could have used me. But no, you keep forgetting I even exist. {walks off slowly and alone}

{sings (badly):} ♪ ♫
"The only one who could ever reach me
Was the son of a silly person..." ♩ ♬

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The Whedonverse wrote:
Since the Whedonverse escaped television, nothing can escape from It's overly contrived clutches.

{in William Conrad narrator voice:} Will Freeholdy the Squirrelly Drow and Yesterday J. Moose escape from Boris Whedon's dastardly cinematic clutches?

Tune in next time for:

"Grind 'Em If You Can't Find 'Em"

- or -

"Clutches Cargocult"

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Treppa wrote:
It's 75 today, but we are supposed to get SNOW! on Thursday! :D :D :D

{shouting angrily} "Freehold DM was able to build a blizzard in a cave! With a box of scraps!"