DungeonmasterCal's House of Respite


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Scintillae wrote:
American College Testing. It's one of the main entrance exams we've got over here. Most kids take it their junior year to start figuring out scholarships/acceptances.

Wait,... just curious, why are YOU writing an ACT prep guide?

We already have so many available to buy.??

(You could probably do BETTER, but they are out there, just sayin')
;)


90s Simpsons Referotron wrote:
Worst. Sorting Hat. Ever.

Yes. This.

I detest Standardized testing.
Mainly because no matter my grades, I SUCK AT IT!

>_<


ACK! do I feel a draft in my wizzie robes?
O_o


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Ragadolf wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
American College Testing. It's one of the main entrance exams we've got over here. Most kids take it their junior year to start figuring out scholarships/acceptances.

Wait,... just curious, why are YOU writing an ACT prep guide?

We already have so many available to buy.??

(You could probably do BETTER, but they are out there, just sayin')
;)

Because I don't want to print off a 30-page packet, so I'm trying to boil down the test structure into "here, study these things" in as little space as possible.

My school has 3 days a week where the kids can travel where they want during homeroom, so I'm offering ACT prep and skills practice on my day with open study room.


3 people marked this as a favorite.
Ragadolf wrote:
quibblemuch wrote:
Oh crap. Monkey Santa got ahold of my dice.

Ooof!

Your gonna need 'Ragadolf's Major Umbrella' spell for THIS encounter!

And sanitizer. Lots of sanitizer.

Tell me about it. Ugh.

And the worst part? All the loot in the campaign is bananas and Red Bull. Every damn session, the same thing.

Worst. GM. Ever.


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Ragadolf wrote:

I detest Standardized testing.

Mainly because no matter my grades, I SUCK AT IT!

>_<

Also, they tell you to use a number 2 pencil and then get really pissed off when you use a number 2 pencil. IS THERE SOME OTHER KIND OF NUMBER 2 PENCIL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT?!

*fling*


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The sort of Number 2 pencil you use to write your name on the Number 2s you hurl about so liberally, perhaps?


2 people marked this as a favorite.
Scintillae wrote:
Ragadolf wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
American College Testing. It's one of the main entrance exams we've got over here. Most kids take it their junior year to start figuring out scholarships/acceptances.

Wait,... just curious, why are YOU writing an ACT prep guide?

We already have so many available to buy.??

(You could probably do BETTER, but they are out there, just sayin')
;)

Because I don't want to print off a 30-page packet, so I'm trying to boil down the test structure into "here, study these things" in as little space as possible.

My school has 3 days a week where the kids can travel where they want during homeroom, so I'm offering ACT prep and skills practice on my day with open study room.

Good point. :)

Wow, you are writing the prep guide, AND you offer study assistance in your room???
You really ARE the 'cool' teacher!
:)


quibblemuch wrote:
Ragadolf wrote:
quibblemuch wrote:
Oh crap. Monkey Santa got ahold of my dice.

Ooof!

Your gonna need 'Ragadolf's Major Umbrella' spell for THIS encounter!

And sanitizer. Lots of sanitizer.

Tell me about it. Ugh.

And the worst part? All the loot in the campaign is bananas and Red Bull. Every damn session, the same thing.

Worst. GM. Ever.

Hrm,... Well,... in game mechanics, Red Bull would be the equivalent of a Haste potion, so there's that at least. :)

Otherwise, yeah, you needs to swipe his GM screen.


Monkey Santa wrote:
Ragadolf wrote:

I detest Standardized testing.

Mainly because no matter my grades, I SUCK AT IT!

>_<

Also, they tell you to use a number 2 pencil and then get really pissed off when you use a number 2 pencil. IS THERE SOME OTHER KIND OF NUMBER 2 PENCIL I DON'T KNOW ABOUT?!

*fling*

OK, It's a dangerous precedent to set, but I agree with Monkey Santa on this one!


Ragadolf wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
Ragadolf wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
American College Testing. It's one of the main entrance exams we've got over here. Most kids take it their junior year to start figuring out scholarships/acceptances.

Wait,... just curious, why are YOU writing an ACT prep guide?

We already have so many available to buy.??

(You could probably do BETTER, but they are out there, just sayin')
;)

Because I don't want to print off a 30-page packet, so I'm trying to boil down the test structure into "here, study these things" in as little space as possible.

My school has 3 days a week where the kids can travel where they want during homeroom, so I'm offering ACT prep and skills practice on my day with open study room.

Good point. :)

Wow, you are writing the prep guide, AND you offer study assistance in your room???
You really ARE the 'cool' teacher!
:)

"Writing" is a strong word. I'm looking at a prep site and going "If the ACT rewards conciseness WHY ARE YOU USING 15 WORDS WHEN 4 WILL DO" and angrily truncating it.

I've got:
Basic structure of the test, timing per question, on average, score you need for a 21 in each section (college acceptance baseline)
Types of question in each section + skills tested therein
English and math have "rundown of grammar guidelines" and "here's a formula list NOW THANK ME FOR FIGURING OUT HOW TO KEYBOARD COMMAND ALL THESE SUPERSCRIPT EXPONENTS"
I'm tempted to give them a "science-specific jargon you might encounter" list as well.


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In unrelated news, I scared my kids with classical music again.

I didn't know FNAF used part of the Carmen overture.


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I need to not be allowed to improvise graphs for ACT prep.

"For a line graph, they'll just want you to find the correct line to answer the question. In this example, which animal was responsible for the most attacks on zoo visitors at the start of the year?"


4 people marked this as a favorite.
Scintillae wrote:

I need to not be allowed to improvise graphs for ACT prep.

"For a line graph, they'll just want you to find the correct line to answer the question. In this example, which animal was responsible for the most attacks on zoo visitors at the start of the year?"

Heh heh heh...


Scintillae wrote:

In unrelated news, I scared my kids with classical music again.

I didn't know FNAF used part of the Carmen overture.

I didn't either, but that's epic-awesome.

As was your playing "In the Hall of the Mountain King" :)


5 people marked this as a favorite.
Monkey Santa wrote:
Scintillae wrote:

I need to not be allowed to improvise graphs for ACT prep.

"For a line graph, they'll just want you to find the correct line to answer the question. In this example, which animal was responsible for the most attacks on zoo visitors at the start of the year?"

Heh heh heh...

THIS.

This is why I don't visit the zoo anymore!

O_o


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In the summer of 1987, I was actually banned from the Memphis Zoo for life. I'm sure I could get in now because, well, it was 1987 lol.


2 people marked this as a favorite.
DungeonmasterCal wrote:
In the summer of 1987, I was actually banned from the Memphis Zoo for life. I'm sure I could get in now because, well, it was 1987 lol.

I'll bet they didn't specify whose life.


What had you done to get banned?


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Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
Drejk wrote:
What had you done to get banned?

I'm betting he freed an ancestor of Monkey Santa.


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:
In the summer of 1987, I was actually banned from the Memphis Zoo for life. I'm sure I could get in now because, well, it was 1987 lol.

Seconding for the story!

I wanna know what constitutes a 'Banned from the Zoo for Life' offense!

($10 says Feros is right!) ;)


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I keep trying to convince myself I'm not easily distracted, but I just had a lengthy conversation with kiddos about the Russian Revolution when we were supposed to be discussing Night.


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Scintillae wrote:
I keep trying to convince myself I'm not easily distracted, but I just had a lengthy conversation with kiddos about the Russian Revolution when we were supposed to be discussing Night.

My history teacher in junior high and high school was like that. There were days when we would intentionally get him derailed onto a tangent because his tangents were far more interesting than the subject matter.


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OK, here's the story of why I was banned from the Memphis Zoo:

My friend Wolf (his real name is Wolfgang) and I were at the zoo. We were in the primate house and just checking out the cool critters. We came to an enclosure where a huge silverback gorilla was sitting observing the people as they walked by. We stopped and looked at him for a minute and Wolf says, "Make that sound the apes did in Tarzan" (the one with Christopher Lambert).

I could do a really good impression of the sort of coughing sounds they made, as well as some of the other vocalizations the producers came up with for the Mangani. The gorilla's head instantly snapped around to look at me. Wolf told me to do it again, so I did. The gorilla rushed toward us and with the flat of his palm slapped the plexiglass barrier so hard it created a short hairline fracture in the material. We nearly pissed ourselves and made a hasty retreat outside.

Next to the primate house as a large outdoor enclosure full of howler monkeys. I began making a call like I'd heard them do on nature programs. This got the whole troop howling. I stopped and we had a good laugh.

Then, from a short distance away, we heard the lions and tigers roaring. The monkeys had agitated them, and their roaring began to frighten the antelopes and zebras in one of the open-air exhibits and they began trotting around and taking up alarm and warning postures. Then the zebras began to stampede around the inner walls of the enclosure, looking for an escape.

That's when one of the zoo employees came up and told us to get the hell out and never come back. He made us show our driver's licenses to the gate attendants and they wrote down our names and a security guard said we were banned for life.

And there you have it.


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(¬_¬)


3 people marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
DungeonmasterCal wrote:

OK, here's the story of why I was banned from the Memphis Zoo:

My friend Wolf (his real name is Wolfgang) and I were at the zoo. We were in the primate house and just checking out the cool critters. We came to an enclosure where a huge silverback gorilla was sitting observing the people as they walked by. We stopped and looked at him for a minute and Wolf says, "Make that sound the apes did in Tarzan" (the one with Christopher Lambert).

I could do a really good impression of the sort of coughing sounds they made, as well as some of the other vocalizations the producers came up with for the Mangani. The gorilla's head instantly snapped around to look at me. Wolf told me to do it again, so I did. The gorilla rushed toward us and with the flat of his palm slapped the plexiglass barrier so hard it created a short hairline fracture in the material. We nearly pissed ourselves and made a hasty retreat outside.

Next to the primate house as a large outdoor enclosure full of howler monkeys. I began making a call like I'd heard them do on nature programs. This got the whole troop howling. I stopped and we had a good laugh.

Then, from a short distance away, we heard the lions and tigers roaring. The monkeys had agitated them, and their roaring began to frighten the antelopes and zebras in one of the open-air exhibits and they began trotting around and taking up alarm and warning postures. Then the zebras began to stampede around the inner walls of the enclosure, looking for an escape.

That's when one of the zoo employees came up and told us to get the hell out and never come back. He made us show our driver's licenses to the gate attendants and they wrote down our names and a security guard said we were banned for life.

And there you have it.

I just knew monkeys were involved somehow...


1 person marked this as a favorite.
DungeonmasterCal wrote:

OK, here's the story of why I was banned from the Memphis Zoo:

My friend Wolf (his real name is Wolfgang) and I were at the zoo. We were in the primate house and just checking out the cool critters. We came to an enclosure where a huge silverback gorilla was sitting observing the people as they walked by. We stopped and looked at him for a minute and Wolf says, "Make that sound the apes did in Tarzan" (the one with Christopher Lambert).

I could do a really good impression of the sort of coughing sounds they made, as well as some of the other vocalizations the producers came up with for the Mangani. The gorilla's head instantly snapped around to look at me. Wolf told me to do it again, so I did. The gorilla rushed toward us and with the flat of his palm slapped the plexiglass barrier so hard it created a short hairline fracture in the material. We nearly pissed ourselves and made a hasty retreat outside.

Next to the primate house as a large outdoor enclosure full of howler monkeys. I began making a call like I'd heard them do on nature programs. This got the whole troop howling. I stopped and we had a good laugh.

Then, from a short distance away, we heard the lions and tigers roaring. The monkeys had agitated them, and their roaring began to frighten the antelopes and zebras in one of the open-air exhibits and they began trotting around and taking up alarm and warning postures. Then the zebras began to stampede around the inner walls of the enclosure, looking for an escape.

That's when one of the zoo employees came up and told us to get the hell out and never come back. He made us show our driver's licenses to the gate attendants and they wrote down our names and a security guard said we were banned for life.

And there you have it.

That is,...

Yeah, no, if your MY age, so back in 1987 you were a teenager?

Yeah, that's funny stuff. :)

I'm PRETTY sure that no who was working there then is still around today, I bet you could go back. If you wanted to. ;P


In 1987 I was 24 years old...lol. Looooooong past the time I should have known better...LOL


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DungeonmasterCal wrote:
In 1987 I was 24 years old...lol. Looooooong past the time I should have known better...LOL

Hah!

Like me,
Old enough to know better,...
STILL too young to care!
;P


Sigh,...
I was the 'GOOD' kid.
All of my interesting stories from my teen/early college years,...
Are about other people. ;P

On the other hand, I DON'T have those interesting juvie records either!
:)


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Monster: Bearded Serpentworm.


Ragadolf wrote:

Sigh,...

I was the 'GOOD' kid.
All of my interesting stories from my teen/early college years,...
Are about other people. ;P

On the other hand, I DON'T have those interesting juvie records either!
:)

Saaaaame. I don't have any interesting stories until I got to playing D&D or NWN, and those stories are all exclusively about crazy things that happened in the games, not to me IRL.

Heck I still don't have any real interesting stories about me IRL.

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

I wouldn’t say you missed anything.


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My "interesting" stories usually just highlight how socially useless I am.

Like the time I got invited to a frat party, and my roommate ditched me about thirty seconds after we got there, so I got bored and walked back to the dorm and spent the night rereading Harry Potter instead.


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Scintillae wrote:

My "interesting" stories usually just highlight how socially useless I am.

Like the time I got invited to a frat party, and my roommate ditched me about thirty seconds after we got there, so I got bored and walked back to the dorm and spent the night rereading Harry Potter instead.

All things considered,

You probably made the better choice.
And had more fun. ;)


I didn't have any interesting stories until I left high school and started college. In high school, I was one of those rare kids who could travel between all the cliques and be pretty popular with all of them. I did a few silly things but stayed pretty reserved until I moved out. Then all bets were off.


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There was also the time my dorm had a school-sanctioned Halloween costume party so like 75% of the dorm just went to Greek Street instead. I went as Link, and there was also a Robin Hood and Peter Pan. No one could keep us straight.


4 people marked this as a favorite.
Scintillae wrote:
There was also the time my dorm had a school-sanctioned Halloween costume party so like 75% of the dorm just went to Greek Street instead. I went as Link, and there was also a Robin Hood and Peter Pan. No one could keep us straight.

This would make a great sketch. And then at the end, some clueless guy comes in dressed (badly) as Legolas and they all turn on him...


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When a simple question leads to the denunciation of an entire culture...

"Why do we have leap years?"
"Because the Earth's revolution is 365 and a quarter days, so we even it up on the fourth year."
"So if your birthday is the 29th, do you have to be like 80 to drink?"
"Why's February so short?"
"Well, Julius and Augustus Caesar, since they were important emperors of Rome, named months after themselves and took some days out of it to make their longer. That's where we get July and August. They're also why the other months' names make no sense. September, sept, means seven."
"But it's the ninth month."
"Yeah. And then July and August happened. So seven-eight-nine-ten are now nine-ten-eleven-twelve, but they kept the names."
"That's stupid. Rome is stupid."

My eighth grade is never on-task. This happened because we were supposed to be talking about ellipses, but one of them decided to figure out exactly how many days until they turned eighteen...


quibblemuch wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
There was also the time my dorm had a school-sanctioned Halloween costume party so like 75% of the dorm just went to Greek Street instead. I went as Link, and there was also a Robin Hood and Peter Pan. No one could keep us straight.
This would make a great sketch. And then at the end, some clueless guy comes in dressed (badly) as Legolas and they all turn on him...

NOW I have to see this video,... O_o

:)


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Scintillae wrote:

When a simple question leads to the denunciation of an entire culture...

"Why do we have leap years?"
"Because the Earth's revolution is 365 and a quarter days, so we even it up on the fourth year."
"So if your birthday is the 29th, do you have to be like 80 to drink?"
"Why's February so short?"
"Well, Julius and Augustus Caesar, since they were important emperors of Rome, named months after themselves and took some days out of it to make their longer. That's where we get July and August. They're also why the other months' names make no sense. September, sept, means seven."
"But it's the ninth month."
"Yeah. And then July and August happened. So seven-eight-nine-ten are now nine-ten-eleven-twelve, but they kept the names."
"That's stupid. Rome is stupid."

My eighth grade is never on-task. This happened because we were supposed to be talking about ellipses, but one of them decided to figure out exactly how many days until they turned eighteen...

Classic school-kid subject derailment.

Give them an inch, they drive the train to Timbuktu!


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Scintillae wrote:

..."Yeah. And then July and August happened. So seven-eight-nine-ten are now nine-ten-eleven-twelve, but they kept the names."

"That's stupid. Rome is stupid."

"All right, but apart from that, what have the Romans ever done for us?"


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"Happy Birthday to meeeeeee,...
Happy Birthday to Meeeeeee!
Happy Birthday dear oldcrankywizarrrrrrrrrrd!
Happy birthday to meeeeeeeeeee!"

<Lower voice> "OhWHYohWHYohWHYamIatWOOORRRRK?!?!"

:)

Answer: so that I can leave EARLY and eat a real lunch,... somewhere,...
;P


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In a stroke of "genius," I have decided that I want to adapt Kingmaker to both 5e mechanics and Eberron.

It has not really left the outline stages and has gone entirely off the rails for the last two chapters. Though I may be reining it back in a smidge.


Ragadolf wrote:

"Happy Birthday to meeeeeee,...

Happy Birthday to Meeeeeee!
Happy Birthday dear oldcrankywizarrrrrrrrrrd!
Happy birthday to meeeeeeeeeee!"

<Lower voice> "OhWHYohWHYohWHYamIatWOOORRRRK?!?!"

:)

Answer: so that I can leave EARLY and eat a real lunch,... somewhere,...
;P

Happy birthday, Cranky Wizard! May there be many more years of yelling at whippersnappers to come!


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Ragadolf wrote:

"Happy Birthday to meeeeeee,...

Happy Birthday to Meeeeeee!
Happy Birthday dear oldcrankywizarrrrrrrrrrd!
Happy birthday to meeeeeeeeeee!"

<Lower voice> "OhWHYohWHYohWHYamIatWOOORRRRK?!?!"

:)

Answer: so that I can leave EARLY and eat a real lunch,... somewhere,...
;P

Happy birthday old man!


Happy birthday, Rags! Here's to a wonderful year and many more to come!


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Last night my Strange Aeons players--as murderhoboey a bunch of murderhobos as ever murdered and then hoboed--actually said: "By the end of this campaign, we're going to be good-aligned. Because these evil bastards leave us no choice."


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OoOoOoOoOohhh,

Happy birthday to Rags,
May his gold come in Bags
Of Holding,
Emboldening,
Him to purchase the famous amusement park 'Six Flags'
And live comfortably off the revenues for the rest of his long & healthy natural life.

Thankyou.


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Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Maps, Pathfinder Accessories, Pawns, Starfinder Society Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

Happy Birthday, Ragadolf!

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