I doubt anyone is going to see this, but I have to say how much I loved this campaign. It was so ridiculous and fun. Easily one of my favorite campaigns.
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Also, Grash was a great addition, and if Tomorbataar ever comes back and reads this, I really enjoyed playing with him, also.
When we were going strong, this was easily the campaign I looked forward to the most. So much fun! Thanks for running it, Almonihah. Question: Did you have any plans for the other two sidequests that we didn't get to? And kudos to Ziphora for being a PC head from the beginning to the end of this campaign.
Yes, let's wrap it up before I have Beachhead eat a hobgoblin out of spite because Zip's not letting him get his way. And I'm floored to consider that people were following along and enjoying our nonsense!
Beachhead addresses Zip and Grash. "So, you guys agree that keeping this army here is a terrible idea, right? Humans are way racist. "I'm thinking we need to take this army, maybe some of our lizardsouls, and go conquer something. It has something for all of us: Grash gets to have a constant war hard-on, I'll like that we get better hunters and sources of food than what Sir Tolgrith's lackadaisical efforts are managing, and Zip is going to appreciate that we are ensuring that these two armies stop fighting each other. "We can even conquer in the queen's name, if we want."
"Send a messenger to the human army and tell a human named Sir Tolgrith that we need to talk to him. "How many troops are left in the army? Where was the army first mustered?"
Beachhead votes to have the body walk towards the army. "Let's go talk to whomever is in charge of the horde, now. After us, I mean."
Beachhead lets out a mighty roar in triumph.
Surprised that these creatures didn't give up when he slew their general, Beachhead unleashes his full compliment of attacks.
"We just killed a bunch of minotaurs! Ugh! Fiiiiiiine." Beachhead kills another stupid minotaur.
Beachhead votes for the body to fart out noxious fumes.
Beachhead votes for a tail swipe at the metal hobgoblin. Grash votes SUPLEX! Or, failing that, BODY SLAM!
Switching to a more surpriseable opponent, Beachhead lashes out at General Gordru, ducking and weaving to confuse her as he attacks.
"Raising an army is pretty impressive! You should feel proud of what you accomplished! Good job!"
Beachhead votes for a tail swipe at the metal hobgoblin.
TRAMPLE SMASH... confirmed.
”NINJAAAAA!”
Four figures march towards you under flag of truce--a hobgoblin, a minotaur, a goblin, and a small dragon.
"I'm not eating sentients Ziphora protests loudly. "Get them to farm or raise cattle so we can eat!" "That seems like a roundabout way of getting the same thing, but okay. General Gordru doesn't care. She'll be dead."
"I am General Gordru," the metal-skinned hobgoblin replies, "We fight for a place to call our own. Here will be just fine for our battle." "Oh. That seems pretty reasonable, actually. Okay, let's fight it out. If you win, you can have the valley. If we win, any survivors from your army will be kept in pens where we will keep them alive so that they can keep breeding and supplying us with a steady source of food. "Oh boy, I sure hope we win!" Beachhead vanishes.
"What?" Beachhead looks at one of the dumb heads and exchanges a can-you-believe-this-lady type of look that presumably isn't returned. "Why did you wait until now for a duel? It seems like you could have just started with that. "Unless there's some sort of societal expectation that this has to happen after our armies fight? If so, then we should exchange pleasantries before we discuss the duel, right? So... what's your name and what's your deal? "I'll go first! My name is Beachhead, this is Ziphora, this is Grash "Warhead," this is Egghead, and this is Pinhead. Our deal is that we live here."
"If they were giving up, wouldn't they just leave? Yeah, let's hear what they have to say."
Sorry, unexpected traveling meant I haven't been able to post much. I like skipping to the end, though.
"Is Mazoss nae regrowin? Bah, we dinnae have tae time ter worry about this, I be thinkin that once we be recovered now may be a good time ter take tae battle to tae enemy." "Sure, sure. How do we recover? Go back to Tolgrith's man and use up more healing?"
"Grash and I killed the rest of the bull guys. The dumb heads regrew as two heads each. We're heading back to camp. Pacem abandoned you."
"Typical of that guy. He leaves when his master is down instead of standing guard over her. Tasty, tasty guard." Beachhead agrees to retreat.
While the hydra feeds, Beachhead investigates Ziphora's neck stump, looking for any signs of regrowth. He's assuming Grash will warn him if anything is headed their way. Or will scream in pain if he's bitten, which will also serve as a warning. Suddenly his eyes narrow and he looks up. "Where's Pacem?"
"WHOA! Our little sibling has a sleeve!"
Beachhead's disembodied voice cuts through the din of battle. "Is Ziphora a fast healer or a regular healer like me? I think she's a fast healer. That's good, but she's also our wings, so we might be in trouble. Any tricks up your sleeve, Grash? Do you even have a sleeve?"
But the minotaur it was going for dodges aside. And into Beachhead's waiting jaws, maybe!
Invisibility: 9/10
"Ooowwwww," Beachhead whines at being axed. He disappears and attacks the minotaur who resorted to violence on him.
Invisibility: 10/10
"I never really connected with Mazzoss, so this is more on principle," Beachhead explains to the minotaurs as he tears into them.
"You're not very sneaky when you shout like that," Ziphora quips at Beachhead. "... "lets go."
Beachhead hides.
"Let's go!"
"Let's just stay here and ignore that!" Beachhead suggests, knowing full well that nobody, not even himself, is going to vote to do anything except checking out the shouts of alarm from the other side of Mazzos' wall.
When he's no longer about to take a violence nap, Beachhead changes his mind and wants to continue fighting for Hydratopia.
Mazzoss looks at the fellow heads and sees which is the most damaged. HP Update! Beachhead - 38/63
Stay and attack - Grash
"We've sufficiently cowed them, and probably weakened them enough for Sir Tolgrith's troops to handle. Let's go get some healing and then go find bigger game."
Beachhead auto-saves because his Reflex saving throw is so high, smirks about it, and then slashes his teeth across as many hobgoblins as possible.
Beachhead spends time during the descent trying to think of a pun that merges "hobgoblin" and "kabob." He doesn't think of any that suit him, however, which leaves him frustrated. He takes out that frustration on the hobgabobs.
Seconded.
Guess how the GM feels when he's running a half-dozen monsters. :D Yeah, but that's why you get paid the big bucks.
I feel like it takes me at least half an hour to put a Beachhead attack post together.
Beachhead contorts his neck to be exactly the same shape and position as one two new sibling heads and pushes up against it to dodge the flames. While hiding, Beachhead disappears!
Beachhead uses his sudden disappearance to confuse the manticore (calling it a "manatee") before he attacks.
Beachhead tears into the manatee! "NINJAAAAAAAAA!"
Beachhead, finally able to do something, waits for over 24 hours since the GM posted before attacking. He comes out of hiding and attacks one of the Canadian rappers named Drake that are flying above the army.
Grash took a deep breath. "I want to make fun of that taunt, but I have to admit that it definitely would have provoked me." Beachhead wills the body towards the manatee. |