Second Darkness beer and pretzles (Inactive)

Game Master drbuzzard

Whoops. Scratch that. I am dead. Oh well.

Man, I loved making old jokes. I don't suppose that means its time for Noonan3 to shuffle into the battlefield?

OOPs ...my bad

Marckus waves a proud farewell to his compatriots, flips the bird to the big man upstairs, and takes one of these dipsticks down with him.
attack 6 & 5ft step
Exploit TPK: 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (20) + 20 = 40 +2 & bypass DR/hardness
Unarmed 1: 1d20 + 29 - 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 29 - 2 + 2 + 1 = 34, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (6, 1) + 16 = 23
Unarmed 2: 1d20 + 29 - 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 29 - 2 + 2 + 1 = 44, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (3, 4) + 16 = 23
Unarmed 2.1: 1d20 + 29 - 2 - 5 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 29 - 2 - 5 + 2 + 1 = 33, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (3, 4) + 16 = 23, Sneak: 8d6 ⇒ (2, 3, 5, 4, 6, 4, 5, 6) = 35 2 STR dmg
Unarmed 2.2: 1d20 + 29 - 2 - 5 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 29 - 2 - 5 + 2 + 1 = 28, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (5, 3) + 16 = 24, Sneak: 8d6 ⇒ (1, 6, 4, 4, 6, 4, 4, 2) = 31 2 STR dmg
Unarmed 3.1: 1d20 + 29 - 2 - 10 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (17) + 29 - 2 - 10 + 2 + 1 = 37, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (6, 1) + 16 = 23, Sneak: 8d6 ⇒ (5, 1, 4, 1, 6, 3, 3, 2) = 25 2 STR dmg
Unarmed 3.2: 1d20 + 29 - 2 - 10 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 29 - 2 - 10 + 2 + 1 = 29, Damage: 2d6 + 16 ⇒ (1, 3) + 16 = 20, Sneak: 8d6 ⇒ (2, 4, 6, 1, 1, 6, 2, 1) = 23 2 STR dmg

Boar Style: 2d6 ⇒ (1, 4) = 5
Demoralize on hit: 1d20 + 32 ⇒ (11) + 32 = 43
Sneak conditional on two hits & successful demoralize

Didn't bother to count my HP since I was downed until I got the idea of getting fed by Wriggly. Counted it and am dead.

Been fun reading your adventures.

Peace out grandpa. See you on the other side real soon.

Man, I can't believe we're about to fight off the entire Bolivian Army!

You take the hundred on the left and I'll take the hundred on the right.

I've searched and I can't seem to find the post where Buzz states that "all Clerics are outfitted with a Determination buckler"

My memory is pretty foggy... I could be mistaken

I think I am a wee bit past it any way due to this happening.

Enough dakka?

I thought you weren't dead. I deliberately shifted targets once you went down and you weren't that close I thought.

If I screwed up, just assume you weren't actually dead dead, just mostly dead (-9 or so).

At the start I had 112 HP and this was the attack on me before you shifted.
1
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 16 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 hit
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 6 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (3) + 15 = 18 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 8 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (1) + 15 = 16 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 9 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (3) + 15 = 18 miss

2
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 3 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (3) + 15 = 18 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 7 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (8) + 15 = 23 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 3 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (1) + 15 = 16 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 19 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (7) + 15 = 22 hit

3
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 15 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (1) + 15 = 16 hit
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 18 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 hit
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 1 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 8 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (6) + 15 = 21 miss

4
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 19 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 hit
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 12 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (5) + 15 = 20 hit
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 9 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (5) + 15 = 20 miss
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 18 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (7) + 15 = 22 hit

5
to hit: 1d20 ⇒ 18 damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 Noonan drops

19+22+16+19+19+20+22+19=156

ahem... Determination buckler

Like I said... Bolt aces.... Evil

You don't need to argue with me. I intended to shift as soon as you went down. I did it wrong, so I'm saying you're still alive. The tumor fixed you. Proceed.

Basically there's no way you could have gotten to -40 if I was stopping when you dropped as each hit does around 20.

2 of those shots would not have targeted you since you would have dropped at that point.

Okies

Noonan wakes up and casts Fickle Winds on himself and Sileth to make them bolt proof. Unfortunately, those noisy rascals are too far away to help. Hmph! Just leaving an old man behind.

I'll just summarize due to laziness.

A bunch of the bolt aces drop. Gumby basically reaps his area after one dropped from archery (4). Sileth drops a few here and there. Marckus beats the every living snot out of the poor single target available too him since he's pissed off having so many attacks to waste and thus mulches the drow into a sort of black pudding (but not the living kind).

The back row seeing the Old duffer get back up tries to perforate him. Each one wastes their touch attack on him, then shifts attacks to other targets (yes, see I'm not trying to slaughter you all).

To start attacks, I'll go up in number again.

Let's just sum that up with Ulthar and Marckus drop. Markcus is at -9. Ulthar is at -16.

Crossbowelves cease firing when both of them go down because they know it is futile. Next round they'll think of something. Grumpy old man and Sileth are up.

Does that include the other 90 damage Ulthar can shave off from stoneskin? If so:

Bleed less: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (18) + 7 = 25

I can put enough damage into you to drop you either way. However I did not consider stoneskin.

Noonan decides to get some cover for the pincushioned bodies of his friends while he works on his next trick and moves up while casting wall of stone

(Ok, making a 1/2 inch wall along the line I added in to give our beefy boyz cover from getting shot)

Sileth continues hitting them in vulnerable spots cause they can't see what's coming

BAB+25(+11BAB +8 DEX, +1 Weapon Focus, +3 GMW, weapon attunement+5 (+1Keen/ Seeking/Cunning/Ghost Touch)
Arcane Pool Swift action +2 frost, shock
Spell Combat cast spell and attack -2
Longbow (1d8+9 /19-20x3 P ) (+5weapon, +1 Martial Focus+1str,weapon spec+2)

deny dex, add+2 to hit and sneak damage if they can't see INVIS
spell combat arrow arrow: 1d20 + 24 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 24 + 1 = 30
damage: 1d8 + 10 ⇒ (6) + 10 = 16
cold damage: 1d6 ⇒ 3
shock damage: 1d6 ⇒ 5
sneak damage if applicable : 8d6 ⇒ (5, 4, 1, 3, 5, 5, 5, 3) = 31

xtra Haste arrow: 1d20 + 24 + 1 ⇒ (18) + 24 + 1 = 43
damage: 1d8 + 10 ⇒ (4) + 10 = 14
cold damage: 1d6 ⇒ 4
shock damage: 1d6 ⇒ 3
sneak damage if applicable : 8d6 ⇒ (2, 6, 6, 1, 3, 2, 3, 3) = 26

arrow#1: 1d20 + 24 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 24 + 1 = 37
damage: 1d8 + 10 ⇒ (7) + 10 = 17
cold damage: 1d6 ⇒ 1
shock damage: 1d6 ⇒ 3
sneak damage if applicable : 8d6 ⇒ (2, 6, 6, 4, 1, 2, 3, 6) = 30

arrow#2: 1d20 + 19 + 1 ⇒ (10) + 19 + 1 = 30
damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (6) + 15 = 21
cold damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6
shock damage: 1d6 ⇒ 3
sneak damage if applicable : 8d6 ⇒ (6, 4, 3, 1, 4, 1, 4, 5) = 28

arrow#3: 1d20 + 14 + 1 ⇒ (7) + 14 + 1 = 22
damage: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (7) + 15 = 22
cold damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6
shock damage: 1d6 ⇒ 6
sneak damage if applicable : 8d6 ⇒ (3, 1, 3, 5, 3, 4, 2, 6) = 27

target order 1,10,9

Hit, hit, hit, hit
first kills 1, 2 more shots down 10, and I'll put the last one into 9.

As I didn't actually dumpstat any intelligence on these guys, they can see they have no chance of winning, so they flee. Combat over. CE doesn't make for the most loyal lackeys.

Combat over.

Noonan runs up and channels twice to get the meatheads not dying
Channelx2: 20d6 ⇒ (1, 3, 3, 5, 6, 3, 2, 1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 5, 5, 1, 6, 2, 4, 6, 1) = 68

Always running off and leaving your elders behind! Let this be a lesson to you!

On vacay.. Will be back Friday

Marckus stands up. "You know, technically I could have switched targets with a 5ft step, but I don't remember anything after that." He declares, looking down at all the holes in his everything. "But I have some suspicions."

Noonan beats Marckus with a CMW wand

CMW: 10d8 + 15 ⇒ (7, 1, 1, 3, 7, 4, 1, 2, 2, 4) + 15 = 47 5 charges used at 2d8+3 per charge

"ow. ow. ow. ow. ow." Still half-dead but also half alive. :D

Noonan disciplines Ulthar
Heals: 10d8 + 15 ⇒ (7, 5, 8, 3, 5, 3, 4, 4, 6, 6) + 15 = 66

While still really injured because the gods dont like barbarians as much as other classes, Ulthar finds a soothing rhythm to Noonans kitten-like discipline.

Whenever you get done with the BDSM games, you can figure out how you want to move onto the next section.

I vote we disallow Sileth from further random teleporting.

The wonders of stimulus/response as a teaching method.

You now have an image of Noonan in leather mask and studded straps in your head. You're welcome.

I guess we follow the fleeing drow. This time perhaps sneaking?

Sneaking...WHY? Let's just teleport in...I think I'm getting the hang of it. Admittedly, it is a new spell for me, maybe a couple of kinks to work out

Sileth will follow the groups lead. He just f~+%ed up and now it's someone else's turn to do something stupid

I heard you fellows were excellent in the stealth arts. Like you mastered both magic and stealth in some strange fusion. Get salty or something.

I'll see your geezer in studded leather and raise you an Ulthar in the gimp costume.

On a more serious note, this is where Noonan not being gestalted into rogue becomes an issue because he lacks the teamwork stealth feat.

since Noonan can't stealth I guess we have to do it the old-fashioned way.

Sileth looks towards where the fleeing drow went I guess we follow them?

"Sileth my good man, would you be able to make our old friend invisible this time? They didn't seem to notice you while I performed the Furious Pincushion-and old combat maneuver of my people-amid the drow bodies."

Ulthar offers a pro-stealth suggestion as he tosses aside the perfectly effective light armor everyone is talking about.

Unfortunatley I only have the Greater version of the spell prepared. While it keeps the target invisible even while attacking it is not useful for sneaking about unlike its lesser version because it lasts one-tenth as long.

You could carry me on your back or just stuff me in a haversack. Just remember to leave the flap open so I can breath.

"Ha! Our last cleric said the same thing. And he... Wait. Is he still in there? Hm, it does smell a bit off."

Stealth party?: 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (8) + 20 = 28

Put Ulthars sneakers on: 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (17) + 20 = 37

Sir Wiggly returns to Ulthar before departing.

Hold on, I remember an old trick some rogue called Gord taught me.

Shuffle sneakily: 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (1) + 20 = 21

Noonan seems to have tied his boot laces together.

stealth: 1d20 + 26 ⇒ (16) + 26 = 42

Gord? Wow you really are old. He did have some interesting tales

Give me a bit. I'm deciding how many nasties to put in this fight. There's not many left after all.

You follow the fleeing drow up a pathway towards the center of the island.

A large lake of glossy black water fills a crater-shaped valley at
the island’s heart. A thirty-foot-wide bridge of stone rises over
the water, supported every forty feet by stone pilings carved
with images of snakes. The drow flee across this towards two large doors at the far side of the bridge.

However in front of the bridge are three gargantuan creatures. They combine the worst aspects of a bear, a mantis, a wolf, and a reptilian humanoid. Apparently unhappy to see the fleeing drow, they rip the first ones to shreds and the rest jump off the bridge into the black lake.

perception: 1d20 + 36 ⇒ (12) + 36 = 48

They see you trying to sneak up on them, so it is on.

init: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (9) + 4 = 13

Anyone have any idea what those are?

Init: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (2) + 7 = 9
"ELF!"

Init: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (7) + 4 = 11

Can't be an elf, there's no shelf.

If an elf and orc had kids, would they be elks? Would a dwarf/orc be a dork?