Choosing the hero's path as usual, The Lusty Fools decide to make good on their promise to the true Dauphin (as much as Iommi-Tyr would prefer to kill both "pretenders"), and they venture southeast on the road to Reims....
As fortune and logic would have it, this throws the captain of the Royal Guard and The Red Blades of Reims off of their trail, for the French soldiers guessed incorrectly that their quarry would go south to Paris on their way to Italy, and would never predict that they would go exactly where the Frenchmen had tried to escort them: the Royal City of Reims!
As the sun begins to set in the west, an orb of copper in a field of deepening violet, The Lusty Fools begin to seek a suitable place to spend the night of the 19th of June....
They are traveling on a dirt road through a meadow with scattered trees....
Suddenly, the sounds of distressed cries for help reach their ears (first the keen ears of Nacht, Paddy, and Hisao, and soon thereafter, Alphonse and Iommi-Tyr hear as well--screams of terror and cries for help in French, male and female, at least two people in distress)!
Looking to the east, from whence come the cries, the heroes behold a brutish hill giant stride into view from behind a copse of oaks, a large, squirming sack thrown over one shoulder, from which come screams and cries for help from a man and a woman in French! in the other hand, the ugly brute hefts a greatclub fashioned from a pine sapling wrapped with iron bands! The giant sees The Lusty Fools as well....
In French: Ye'd best bugger off, puny menfolk, lest Grogan decide to toss ye in his meatpot as well!
Grogan the hill giant pauses at a distance of 70 feet from the Lusty Fools....
"Let those people loose or you'll feel the sting of Foereaper." Alphonse warns and puts his hand to the scythe.
"Let those people loose or you'll feel the sting of Foereaper." Alphonse warns and puts his hand to the scythe.
[dice=Initiative]1d20+1
Foereaper, eh?.... How would you like to feel the sting of Mancrusher!?
The hill giant drops the bag of struggling French peasants and takes up his great club in both calloused hands.... He then stomps 40 feet closer, and is now but 30 feet away ....
The cloaked being gives a shrill response to the giant-being. " Are there... more of you? More to skin? "
Hand dancing along the edge of a serrated bade intricately.
Confusing his five slayers as his dinner, Grogan pays no heed as the man and woman he'd grabbed from their field and stuffed in his sack crawl free and make a run for it....
Fee! Fye! Foe! Fum! Little people sure be dumb!
**Some night**
Happy to be no longer in disguise the first night on the road that Hisao bunks down he rearranges his pack and finds his brand new cloak. He shakes it at the others.
Are you not worried by the kind of gifts we have been getting? All praise to Sun Wukong, may he always have peanuts, of course, but it is worrying no?
On his celestial bamboo perch in the Third of The Seven Heavens, The Monkey King grins at Hisao's words, and plucks a handful of peanuts from his magical pouch of unending peanuts, popping them into his mouth....
Nom....nom-nom.... Do not worry, Mister Hisao, I never run out of peanuts....
He then pats his basket of plentiful bananas and adds: ....or bananas!
Wow.... Me want unending peanuts and plentiful bananas too! Eeeek! Eeeeek!
Very well, my dear Initiative Monkey.... If you complete a quest for your king, he shall grant thee unlimited peanuts and bananas!
OOOH!! Oooohhh!!!! Tell me, o great and glorious Monkey King, how me obtain this wondrous reward!? Eeeeek! Eeeeek!!!
You must keep initiative for The Lusty Fools versus Grogan the Hill Giant, first of all....
Erm.... Okay.... Me was gonna do that anyway....
And when the victor has been declared, go and fetch me a glass of milk to wash down these peanuts, okay? Then I shall grant you cool magic gear of infinite snacks like mine!
Eeeeek! Squeeeeeeaaaaaahhh!!!!
" Giant-being has giant tendons, they snap well... "
As Nacht reveals his other pair of arms, brandishing small blades themselves. The low hum of a beetle's wings can be heard as the creatures begins to hover and then shoot up and around the Giant to flank it from the other side.
Well, it looks like this little piggy is a bit big for my skewer....perhaps we should cut him into more manageable pieces first?
**That same night**
Nacht looked at the surprise Hisao-being displayed upon finding.. something. The other beings had similar happenings, yet Nacht found no such thing. Nacht simply felt stronger from the feasts he had. The experience of the kill, being the being of fear. Nacht's eyes wandered upon the Hisao-being before shaking its head. " I have not been given such gifts. I have earned my feed. "
" Giant-being has giant tendons, they snap well... "
As Nacht reveals his other pair of arms, brandishing small blades themselves. The low hum of a beetle's wings can be heard as the creatures begins to hover and then shoot up and around the Giant to flank it from the other side.
As Nacht flies around the giant's head, it takes a mighty swing with Mancrusher, batting The Beetle Man for bludgeoning damage....
The sound of a tough carapace rebounds the large club though an audible crack. " This food is tenacious... "
**That same night**
Nacht looked at the surprise Hisao-being displayed upon finding.. something. The other beings had similar happenings, yet Nacht found no such thing. Nacht simply felt stronger from the feasts he had. The experience of the kill, being the being of fear. Nacht's eyes wandered upon the Hisao-being before shaking its head. " I have not been given such gifts. I have earned my feed. "
Anyhoo.....
Grogan Le Hill Giant! (Dropped his sack o' peasants and ambled up a bit closer to the LFs)
Hisao the Monkey King's ninja!
Alphonse the Reaper!
Paddy the Magsman!
Nacht the Beetle Man! (Flew around and was given a whack of opportunity)
TBD: Iommi-Tyr the Sage!
OOOH! OOOH!
I suspect Vuh Lusty Fools are 'bout reaty tuh split vis 'ere giant a new a##@$+&$, as it were! 50 gold shillings on Vuh Lusty Fools!
Hemoglobins collywaddle penny whistles all vuh way, bro!!! ..... Er.... That is, me too. Fifty gold shillings on The Lusty Fools givin' an extra a!!+&%~@ to vis 'ere 'ill giant!
**Some night**
Happy to be no longer in disguise the first night on the road that Hisao bunks down he rearranges his pack and finds his brand new cloak. He shakes it at the others.
Are you not worried by the kind of gifts we have been getting? All praise to Sun Wukong, may he always have peanuts, of course, but it is worrying no?
"I am comforted, myself. To know our path is righteous and God is aiding us on our quest."
-----------------------------------------------------
Meanwhile, in the present, Alphonse opens up a can of medieval whoop-ass, with extra whoop.
Or tries to, anyway.
Foereaper's arc is arrested before the blade can slice into the giant's hide by a surprisingly quick parry with Mancrusher!
Round une!
Grogan Le Hill Giant! (Dropped his sack o' peasants and ambled up a bit closer to the LFs)
Hisao the Monkey King's ninja!
Alphonse the Reaper! (Moved up to Grogan and missed)
Paddy the Magsman!
Nacht the Beetle Man! (Flew around and was given a whack of opportunity)
TBD: Iommi-Tyr the Sage!
OOOH! OOOH!
Hisao, Paddy, and Tyr all get to act before Grogan starts crushing men with Mancrusher at the top of round deuce....
Hisao loops around behind the giant to give others even more flanking opportunities and slashes.
Hisao loops around behind the giant to give others even more flanking opportunities and slashes.
[dice=Invisible slashing but no flanking]1d20+9;1d6+2+1d6+3d6
Dokuhebinokiba (Viper Fang) fails to penetrate the giant's armor of layered hides....
Paddy darts forward, his blade seeking a squishy part of the giant to sink into.
[dice=stabby]1d20+10+2; 1d6+5; 3d6
Alas, GreenThorne bows slightly as Paddy tries to drive the magic rapier deep into the hill giant's great, round belly, but fails to puncture!
Grogan swings his greatclub Mancrusher at "the shiny little man" (Alphonse) .... WHIFF--THUMP!!!.... But the sapling crashes into the ground instead as the aasimar knight dodges!
The upswing also misses Alphonse....
GRRRRR!!!! 'Old still, little shiny man!!!
Round deuce!
Grogan Le Hill Giant! (Misses Alphonse twice)
Hisao the Monkey King's ninja!
Alphonse the Reaper!
Paddy the Magsman!
Nacht the Beetle Man!
TBD: Iommi-Tyr the Sage!
OOOH! OOOH!
Hisao tries again and, frustrated by his inability to hit uses his ki to slash again with supernatural speed.
"I'd rather not."
[dice=Now with flanking]1d20+11;1d6+2+1d6+3d6
[dice=Now with flanking and ki]1d20+11;1d6+2+1d6+3d6Hisao tries again and, frustrated by his inability to hit uses his ki to slash again with supernatural speed.
Grogan chuckles at Hisao's first stab, which seems to tickle him more than anything, but he is not amused when the ninja's second stab finds a nerve....
HEH-HEH-HEH-H-OWWW!!!
"I'd rather not."
[dice=REAP MY FOE]1d20+11
[dice=Damage?]2d4+13+2d6[dice=AND AGAIN]1d20+6
Alphonse's first swing sinks Foereaper into the giant's hip and unleashes a jet of red blood!
YEEEEOOOOWWWWLLL!!!!
The second swing is made hastily in the young knight's zeal for vanquishing evil monsters, and the giant steps out of its arc just in time....
Quit squirming, ya big oaf!
Paddy slashes at a hole in the giant's defenses.
Quit squirming, ya big oaf!
Paddy slashes at a hole in the giant's defenses.
[dice=shiv]1d20+10+2+1; 1d6+5+1; 3d6
[dice=crit]1d20+10+2+1; 1d6+5+1
AAARRRRRGGGHH!!!!
Grogan bellows in rage and pain as the nimble Irishman punctures sinew under the giant's massy arm....