Its "A" Dungeon, Too: The Second Chance (Inactive)

Game Master Terquem

We have 1600 GP from the room prior to the beast arriving, A headband you currently have (+4 CHA) that is worth a rather fantastic amount. (No one but Bud is aware of its value. that I can tell) and then the Albums guarded by bacon loving alligators which I believe were worth either three or four thousand gold. So we should be covered to spend 400 just with Tofutee's share.

tofutee waves her hand rapidly trying to remove the sticker swearing and rolling twice before hinging on the idea of just scraping the thing off on the altars edge.
"Ok.. well that was embarrassing. Anyway four hundred gold seems a lot more reasonable. That's how it works right?

Beast offers up a handful of coins that he has in his sac (He has "A large sack of Coins"), probably about 50gp worth. Is dis four thousand? Need more? Beast seems to genuinely want to help Tofutee out, but seems to have little grasp on the concept of money.
When Tofutee attempts to remove the sticker, and struggles along the way, Beast reaches into his pack once again and pulls out a vial of Universal Solvent and hands it to her. Dis usually works!!

After placing the correct number of gold coins in the slot, there is a shudder from the altar, and then a loud noise

*sneeerrrgg*

and right before Bud's and beast's eyes Tofutee is transformed back to her former self.

Now that Tofutee has returned to her former shape, the group takes a moment to consider returning to the surface, perhaps to resupply or even check in with someone, somewhere.

Tofutee shrugs into her newly restored form, popping her neck with a satisfied noise. "Ugh. I am never going to want to have my nose to that close to the floor in here again. I still want lettuce.. stupid curse."
With that tofutee looks over to Beast and gives him a toothy grin.
"Thanks, I'm alright now though. Much easier when I have hands. Could I have my stuff back?"
The Baconling then glances at the room and seems to make a decision.
"Lets get the heck out of here. I've had my fill of this place for the day, those adventurers will still be here when we get back I suspect."

Bud looks at his friend, "You look much better as yourself. I agree, let's head out of here. We can make a few purchases and recuperate. I'll even buy you a beer. It's Miller time."

Beast smiles when he sees Tofutee return to her normal form, hes glad that she is how she used to be.
You is back! Good. Here is your stuff. Beast then hands her quite a large chunk of miscellaneous gear and then takes a good stretch with the load off of his shoulders.
Then he looks left, then right, furrows his eyebrows and spins around for a moment. Ummmm... Which way is out? I is lost :S
Can I has a beer when I gets out too?

Do you need a list of your equipment for your character Tofutee, or can I just delete it off of my sheet?

I have it all on my sheet. You are free to delete it from yours. Thanks

"I know the way" Tofutee states confidently as she begins walking to the exit

The “A” Dungeon, Entrance, Du’Orbna

Day 7, approximate time of day 1:30 pm

With Tofutee’s keen memory, and a few notes scribbled on various napkins, wrappers, and odd bits of paper, the three monsters backtrack through the dungeon until they have returned to the entrance once again.

They have found some treasure; it should sell well at Jeffry’s Emporium.

The city of Du’Orbna is as it was when they entered, a hustle and bustle over there on that street, a slow quiet street over there, monsters, and non-monsters going here and there in the semi-permanent shadowy darkness that is the shroud that covers the city day and night. Of course, right now, in the middle of the day it seems darker than it will when the moon is out (something about the spell that shrouds the city seems to work better at blocking the suns light but hardly blocks the light of the moon, but that could all change now that certain wizard-scientist have begun suggesting that the light of the moon is merely the same light of the sun reflected off the moon’s surface, who knows maybe the spell will catch on to this detail and even itself out…)

A quick run back to the Shady Dragon and the monsters can have a fine meal, good things to drink, and a warm place to sleep.

"Ok, so before we split up we ought to get the reward squared away. The coin we earned this time ought to be fairly significant. You know if that has is worth much old guy? Thats the only thing we picked up that I can't fathom a guess to."

Tofutee drags the large pile of loot off and returns amazingly with three equal! shares of loot and a pensive look on her face. The small plant examining the page and sighing.
"Well I've got bad news and I guess badder news? I wasn't able to get any deals from Jeffrey's apparently the new guy has all the emotions of a rock. He might also actually be a rock for all I could see of him. Secondly though, looks like those adventurers we were hired to chase left the dungeon and signed up for some testing of a newer dungeon. So because they went legit it seems we are now out of a job."
The baconling explains as she looks up to the pair
" I'm not sure about you two but I can't say that going back to reclamations after all this will work for me. Taking care of a dungeon and experiencing it are two very different things after all and I don't think I'm done seeing the sights yet."
With that statement out of the way she turns up the paper in her hands and holds up what appears to be a flier
" That being said we seem to work well together and the yearly clear-out is coming up. If you two are still interested in delving I think we could do pretty well as a team this year. You two want to talk it over with me following a meal at the Shady dragon?"
They've proven to be rather solid after all, killing them for the loot would be good short term. Think this might work out better in the long run though.

Bud looks at Tofutee as she gives the update, "It's good to hear that they have amended their ways and are now working for the boss."

Bud orders a 5th ale as he drains his 4th and looks at the others, "I think going back in for the clean out sounds fun. We can spend what we earned and then rest and study up for the event. What do you guys say?"

Tofutee shrugs as she looks to the drinks back to the table in front of her and the half eaten spider-buffalo burger on her plate. Which she then devoured in one oversized bite.
Right we are already in the Shady dragon. How high am I right now? When did I get so high? Are they using additives that interact weirdly with plants again? Suffice to say Tofutee had some interesting suppliers of things

"Well being that I asked I'm all for it. I can go find some things out about the competition and how it all works before it starts. Then learn about anyone who might be a threat. To bribe, blackmail or murder at a later date I guess. Though I suppose that depends on how well they've written their rulebook." The plant responds to the drunken one before signaling to the bartender that she wanted a second grease slathered heart attack on a bun.

Bud sighs as he downs his 5th ale and signals for another, "They just don't make ale like they used to, this stuff is a weak as water. I'm not even slightly buzzed."

As Tofutee talks about bribing, blackmailing and murdering, Bud gives her a dirty look, "There is no need for those type of antics. Live and let live and just do a better job than everyone else. Everyone wins if they all do their best and you can all go have ice cream after the competition."

After a full day has gone by (Bud could wake up or already be awake when this happens) Bud suddenly feels as if something very uncomfortable in his shoe was recently taken out, and he cannot remember exactly why he was being so nice to everyone

The alignment change was not permanent, and merely lasted for 24 hours

The three new friends decide to spend a bit more time getting ready for the upcoming event, and decide to pool their resources on some much needed equipment

I’m not finished with the new document, so we are still in pause mode, sorry

No worries Terquem. I guess we can continue the bar talk while we wait. Never mind that we haven't heard from beast in a bit.

Tofutee gives the Ex-man a queer look as she examines the mans ale "They didn't put any angel dust in that drink of yours right? Adventurers aren't saints to begin with and I know for a fact when they see me the kid gloves are going to come off. I've yet to meet an adventurer that is anything but aggressively neutral about my presence at the shop. Well I suppose Al at that weird suishi and public embarrassment joint down town counts but I'm certain he isn't a garden variety murder hobo." The plantling replies as she looks around the bar for any oversized salad bowls.
" Huh, I don't see Custard Prime around here. Guess he wasn't kidding about having to head back home. Wherever that is. I like our new fluffball better anyway."

"There is no need to descend to their level, my dear friend Tofutee. I mean if we.....", Bud eyes become glassier (if that's possible) and then buzz side to side for a moment and then he shakes his head. "What the h377 was I talking about, of course we off em and take their stuff! What in the world came over me? You are right about the Beast though Tofutee, he is a helpful sorta chap."

[occ]He's been MIA in another game as well. Not sure what's up there.[/ooc]

Hope its just work or something.

Tofutee nods and breathes a deep sigh of relief. " Bless the black goat and all its uncountable young. Do you have any idea how annoying you are preaching 'Love and Peace™'?" The plant woman rants, gesturing with one hand over her head in a lazy halo
" I mean I ended up a wombat for a while and that was less of a whammy than whatever did well.. that. I'm a damn plant, transformation magics have never worked on me or my sisters its like you suddenly getting drunk again. Seriously never take up selling salvation, you are damned persuasive for a decrepit bag of bones. I suspect you'd get half the work force talking about stuff like equal representation and needs based hierarchies. Or I dunno, rebelling and trying to establish a floating island paradise." Tofutee calming a bit as she gives a light laugh at her own words.
"So as I was saying before we will need to find out the rules before finding ways to break them in acceptable ways. Guess I could go see if one of those infernal law offices have any advice relating to the tournament. Assuming it functions like anything else in this city the rulebook is going to weigh several hundred pounds and be a byzantine nightmare to navigate that will summon horrors from beyond the stars if you read it wrong."

"I mean, I've got nothing better to do. Sleep is for people made of meat after all."

Oops. We back at this? Ill have to read up a bit to get caught up again :)
Edit: Wow I missed a lot... Not sure how, I THINK that I opened the tab but forgot to read it because I had no idea this hadnt stopped about a month ago. Sorry :/
Ill get a gameplay post up about my experiences in a bar in a moment XD

back at splitting the loot:
Beast receives his portion of the loot with a Dank you. Gotta be polite. Beast then also SMILES at her, and the rows of large teeth (teeth that are designed to eat plants, mind you) make you just a little glad you split the loot evenly.
I could go back to doing construchion. I is good at that.
Yet despite saying that, he follows you into the bar.

Within the bar:
After a bit of a scuffle with the proprietor about allowing livestock into the Shady Dragon, the owner seems to give way when it is pointed out that his "handlers" are a pair of zombies and plants... And that they have good money...

Once they are finally settled at a table and the waitress asks for their orders, beast looks at one of the others with an expectant and confused look. Finally Tofutee orders for him Here. Get a mug of Cauim. Its a beer made from hops and corn.
Had to look those up :/
Satisfied, Beast goes to drinking his beer, and finds that he enjoys it greatly.
Dis tastes like da fields back home. and with that he drinks it down, ordering a second.
Who is da fluffball? An I is glad I can be helpful! I can carry da stuffs and open doors an scare people an... He continues to list of some of his more useful points. It is clear that he is getting drunk.
Then he orders a third.
If yoush get dat book, I, uhh, could read it for you... Im sure I could break dem in all kinds a ways.
I say lets do it! an afterwards we can build a floating castle!
You can tell that he has never been drunk before, and has no idea what it does to him.
You also get the feeling that he would agree to just about anything when he is drunk. kinda like me :(

I also like the idea of Beast, the one who is intellectually the slowest being the one to memorize the rulebook and be quoting it from time to time ^-^

We are still kind of on break until Terquem finishes his newest version of the Dungeon document. Mostly its going to be us hanging around the bar or going to the various attractions of the city. What with it being a rather large place I suspect there is plenty to explore. Flush with cash as we are we are likely free to wander about.

"Fluffball is you. Flanksteak is the guy you replaced. Good you want to join us for this. It kind of became a group thing to make up nicknames for each other. Before the walking beer mop had his brush with 'Nice' I don't think I'd actually heard my real name since we did introductions. Hasn't been that long to be honest but it feels like it."
Tofutee looks up at her fuzzy companion and his slight sway before clucking at the great doof.
" You don't need to try and keep up with that old liquor sponge. He not really going to feel it what with him being de- devilishly well experienced with alcohol. Hes likely got centuries on you where that is concerned." the plant woman explains as she then gestures to herself.
" And I can't exactly feel it, though if you want to read the rulebook knock yourself out. This flyer has the gist of the rules but it says more specific rulings are available if you request them from the government records. Though you might want to save that for tomorrow."

Your idea amuses me. Beast might also be the only person able to easily carry the unabridged copy of the rulebook so even if he didn't know an answer he could look it up from the ridiculously huge book. Perhaps also beat someone with it if the situation required it.

[ooc]I can just see it now, Beast picks up a new class and begins to beat the other teams with the book, or throws it at them. Beast the Rules Lawyer."[/b]

Beast, barrister most swole.
The surprise weapon trait, breaker barbarian archetype and a solid book could inflict some rather hefty damage paired up with power attack and rage. I know there was a thred a while back about a "Barbarian Librarian" somewhere. Damn if that wouldn't fit in just fine with this group.

Did Flanksteak taste like alligator? Beast asks as he pulls out another strip of alligator hide and begin munching on it.
Don worry Tofffiitty.. I wont forget ya ya name! Beast says with reassurance, yet slurring his words.
Knock people out with da roolbook? K. I can do that. An I could make jokes too!!

Ok. I have not yet leveled up to 5 yet (sheepish) but man if I dont think that would be hilarious to try and do! And I could tell Knock Knock jokes!
First, spend a skill point to learn to read :/ Then catch off guard?
What are the chances that Terquem would get me a massive rule book? I can carry up to 1000lbs >:)

Edit: Hmmm. Actually I already did level up...

Tofutee seems to consider something as she looks at beasts blunt teeth chewing on flesh. "No, flanksteak was fluffy like you but he had horns and hooves. so he'd probably taste like whatever he turned into custard and got mashed into his fluff last, then a cow after that. And if you want to beat someone with a rulebook far be it from me to stop you. That sounds like a 'technically correct' method of knocking out our completion that the devils in charge might appreciate. Less likely we get kicked out or penalized."

Having long ago grown accustomed to living among humans, Ruul is not surprised when those on Du'Orbna's streets react the way they do and he pays them little mind when the men cower, the children cry, and the women swoon. While other heralds of the Lord of Beasts might delight in being among such fragile creatures, Ruul knew he had another, higher, calling. He'd been chosen by mighty Baphomet to come to this place to seek out the Lich Baroness It’Dupree's infamous dungeon, master its depths, and claim glory (and loot) in His name. It was a task he was well suited for.

Eager for a drink to wash the dust of the road from his mouth, he enters the Shady Dragon Inn. Settling onto a stool at the bar which groans under his weight, he gestures to the barkeep. "Ale and something to eat. Preferably meat. And rare."

Tofutee looks up from her Spiduffalo and gestures to one of the newly arrived patrons. "Kinda like that one over there except he was brown and didn't eat meat. " Tofutee states blandly as she examines the newly arrived bull.
"Never knew they came in white. Wonder if he's still got the 'New Steer' smell. "

With that she looks over to Bud " So I know you will run out of power if we just keep blitzing forward for that long. Any thoughts as to what we could pick up that might keep you in the fight for longer? I figure it might be an idea to pick up a scroll or two of lesser restoration so you two won't need sleep. I'd also heard of a ring that can shorten the time it takes to prepare spells for wizarding types. A couple of gnomes were arguing over one once, it was amusing to watch Ollch the Swarthy punt them when they started a fire in the bar."

Hey boss, I was thinkin'-

What did I tell you about bothering me when I'm eating or f@!!ing, vermin

I'm sorry boss but this is real important. You're lookin' to explore that dungeon, right? Well isn't that place bad news? Why not hook up with a crew? You know, get some fools to watch your back while you're down there.

...and who would you suggest? Common sellswords? We didn't come here with allies in mind and I don't have time to build a new cell of Templars.

This tavern's full of interesting types. I'm sure I can find you a group of the usual. You know, an armored soldier, a pointed-hatted mage, a-

Enough! Interview every wretched soul in this place if you have to but leave me to my meal.

A moment later the barkeep returns with a large overflowing flagon of ale and a platter heaped high with bloody-rare animal parts. The white bull begins supping noisily.

Let's see what we got here:

A bunch of elven women loaded up with bows and arrows. Rangers prolly. The boss would spook their animals.

Gnomes. No way. The boss can't work with gnomes. He's be distracted all the time with thoughts of eatin' them.

Armored sorts covered in holy symbols. Paladins. That's never gunna happen.

Lady-barbarians. Now we're talkin'. The boss likes 'em big. I wonder-

What in the Nine Hells are those guys? Looks like a zombie, an ape, and... is that lady made outta fungus?! Oh, that's the ticket!

***

Hey toots! a flippant nasal voice beams into Tofutee's head. Are you and your table explorin' the Dutchess's dungeon? Cause that big studly side of beef sittin' at the bar's lookin' for a crew and he's heading the same way.

"Toots?" Tofutee echos verbally tilting her head slightly. scanning the room to see if she could address the source of the voice.
" Well strange and recently added voice in my head currently I was contemplating my dinner, we are dungeon monsters and not actually adventurers. And by your questions I'd take you and what I presume to be your partner or master would be from out of town. So unless you've a desire in paying a large chunk of cash to an infernal law contractor or settling down for a good six months of paper work you and your round roast over there won't be doing much of that. We can't have just anyone rampaging through the halls of the dungeon after all. There is a tournament happening soon though." The plant woman responds
" That being said, yes we were in the dungeon for a time. Hunter team for an errant adventuring party."

Tofutee then looks up at her fellow monsters
" No, I'm not even more insane. Theres a voice asking me if we are headed back into the dungeons soon as white and fluffy over there is looking to get in on it. Any thoughts? Oh and voice in my head feel free to chime in on your masters more impressive qualities if you feel like swinging to vote. And no, rippling pecs or impressive stamina in bed do not count as impressive qualities in this instance."

That's even better! the voice shouts within Tofutee's mind. The Boss is an great hunter. You shoulda seen what he did to those Iomadeans on the way here. They're gunna be walkin' funny for a while... if they ever walk again! Beyond ripplin' pecs and bein' an absolute animal in bed, literally, he's a wicked good fighter with his slicer and those big horns of his. Also, he's a chosen of Great Lord Baphomet, the King of Beasts, Lord of the Labyrinth, and my favorite demonlord. He's got all of Lord B's best blessings, including a gift for prophecy and the rare power to knit back together creatures like you and me.

So whatdoya say toots? Should I call the big bull over? Please say yes. I'm hopin' he likes you and he won't rip my wings off again.

"Do me a favor and don't shout in my brain. That is a really weird feeling to deal with. "
Tofutee asks annoyance shining through her diplomatic facade. She then looks back over at her companions.
"Ok so white and curly is apparently able to heal people and chop things he doesn't like. Plus, yanno horns. Also some useless things, but then everyone has hobbies. Minion-Mcgee here also has wings, can talk telepathically and is invisible so I'd go ahead and guess a demon. Which makes sense what with flanksteak being demon lords chosen, flavor of the day is apparently Baphomet . Could be useful, at the very least the shiny paladin heros would go after him before us."

"And you're sure you're not more insane than usual? Haven't gone off your rocker? I know that place can do strange things to you. But if you're sure a target would be good. Something to distract things while we pick up the loot and no loss if it doesn't come back." Bud shakes his head and orders more ale. He seems a bit plumper now, sorta like a sponge filling back up.

"Well everyone around here is insane, at least a little bit. However this one is fairly specifically pitching the Minotaur in the corner like a brain talking street vendor. I don't think I'd do that to myself."
With that she nods at the undead, averting her eyes at his spongy nature.
"Any thoughts on having a new arrival joining us for this Beast?"

First Beast flags down the waiter and gets yet another round of Cauim, then addresses Tofutee.
Yous shhure dis stuff isnt getting to you? He hoists up his mug towards Tofutee, the irony thick in the air.
He Wants ta joins us? Shurrr. (remember, agrees to just about anything when drunk)
Here. I'll go greet da new guys... both a dem..
Rather abruptly Beast gets up off his chair and sways a bit, then staggers his way over towards the other big furry guy in the bar.

Ruul: You see a large Beast swagger his way over to you with a mug in his hand. (You know of the Beasts. They are a herd animal native to the region that are often used as a labor force the way we would use oxen or mules. It is unusual to see one inside a building, even more so to see one with a mug in his hand.
This one seems to stagger his way over towards you and throws an arm over your shoulder before sitting beside you, his breath rank with liquor.
Hi FlankSteak... I is glad to meet you. You goinna join ush?
He then goes towards his mug once more, just now realizing its almost empty yet mostly on the floor...

Im trying to do drunk. I dont think I am doing it well... XD
But here goes :) I also figure that "the drunk guy" can be a good bridge to get this party together :)
Hope it wasnt too much :(

Here comes one of 'em boss!

Putting his meal on hold, Ruul turn to study the unknown Beast as it approaches. Surprised by what he sees, he cocks an eyebrow.

"My name is Ruul Spiritskin and, yes, I am interested in joining with your group if you're headed into the dungeon. What should I call you? I'm told you're charged with running off unwanted adventurers."

Ruul is an albino minotaur with dark red eyes and an intense gaze. His hide is a rich white except for lines of bright pink scars that litter his chest and arms. Yellowed horns curve up and forward from his bovine skull, ending in deadly spear-like points. Despite only being roughly the height of a moderately tall human, he's incredibly muscular, broad shouldered, and brawny, with proportions similar to a professional wrestler. Strapped to his back is a polearm that ends in a pitted black iron blade.

Just fine

Tofutee was too busy mulling over a three layer corn pun to intercept the dire blockhead before he was already doing things.
"Dammit fuzzy" The tiny plant woman sighs and looks at her burger. The creatures mouth, lower lip and throat all the way to the clavicle flower into a horrifying toothed maw rapidly devouring the last half of her burger. Also the plate and a chunk of the table as it wipes her hands on her pants and walks over to the brow quirked steer.

With mottled skin of white green and blue, moss green hair and obviously inhuman eyes the creatures arrival was heralded by the scent of freshly cooked bacon oddly enough. A few daggers clinking on her belt but most of her belonging still remained in a comically oversize backpack next to the chair.
"Hey there. Hope Beast isn't causing any problems." the plant woman asks somewhat apologetically.
" Amazing as it is he cracked a few too many. Anyway I heard you introducing yourself, Names Tofutee. As to the rest yeah our most recent job was to hunt down some adventurers who didn't pay their dues and file their paperwork to loot Its'A'dungeon™ legally.
No, I have no idea how I just said that symbol, its a wizard thing I suspect.
Don't ask.
Also if you haven't encountered them already there has been an issue recently with censor gremlins ruining everyones curses."

Ruul greets the monstrous plant-woman with a nod of horned bovine head and repeats himself. "Ruul Spiritskin."

"Hey there. Hope Beast isn't causing any problems." the plant woman asks somewhat apologetically.

" Amazing as it is he cracked a few too many. Anyway I heard you introducing yourself, Names Tofutee. As to the rest yeah our most recent job was to hunt down some adventurers who didn't pay their dues and file their paperwork to loot Its'A'dungeon™ legally.
No, I have no idea how I just said that symbol, its a wizard thing I suspect.
Don't ask.
Also if you haven't encountered them already there has been an issue recently with censor gremlins ruining everyones curses."

"Have you crushed these unwelcome adventurers already or is there more to be done? That happens to be one of my hobbies", the white bull rumbles with a cruel smirk. "One that I take great pleasure in."

"What's this about censor gremlins? I don't think I've encountered any of them yet. Are they a problem?"

"No" Tofutee huffs as she cranes her head to look at the bovine. "They got lucky and were picked up by some research group to test a new dungeon or something. Can't kill them if they are working for the baroness after all. Well not with higher ups paying attention at least." The plant woman regretfully replies muttering something under her breath about dwarf-kabobs. " Censor gremlins though, not really a problem they are just annoying. Can't spice your @#$#ing sentences like you want because of those @#@#%canoes. Also fairly sure it drives the hags batty."

"That's what that is..." Ruul says as he recalls the telepathic conversation he'd had with his familiar just a moment ago. "That's f+#~ing annoying. Does it happen inside the dungeon too?"

Tofutee nods "Yep, though they seem to only focus on words that are agreed on as swears in a language. You just have to get more highbrow in your insults, figured I'd do you a favor and let you know about them now rather than puzzle over why your words keep fuzzing out of your brain. Not sure if it was the devils or the angels that brought them here but it would be nice if they could die off already."

Ruul rumbles unhappily.

"If your prey's taken off what is the plan for you and your team? Guarding a dungeon when there's no chance of intruders doesn't sound very rewarding."

"Ah, right newcomer. Sorry I forget sometimes It'dupree's method of rule around this place is weird when you not lived in it. Guarding a dungeon like that is impossible, its a writhing labyrinth that literally changes overnight. Never mind that the near infinite number of imps running the traps. I'd say it mostly guards itself. Really more of an amusement and attraction than anything else, though I suppose the depths do hold secrets there are not many who've made it deep enough to know and those who have must have not said much. Assuming nothing else occurs I'll be headed back to to reclamations once this tournament is over. Non-compliant adventurers are not common enough that hunter teams are kept on staff. Well of low enough threat to send minions after rather than just using some magic hockus pokus to find them." Tofutee informs blandly as she flicks a thumb across one of her maws teeth removing a clinging bit of wood as it closed to better resemble humanoid shape. " However there is a tournament occurring in the near future that you don't need a dungeon license to participate in. Its going to be a bloodbath I and my little crew over intend to participate and hopefully win. I guess your little minion didn't have much chance to fill you in on what I said to it a moment ago as ol' drunk and fuzzy came to say hello." Tofutee shrugs and reaches into a pocket unfoldig a flier of middling quality offering it to the bull.

if you choose to read it
The scrap informing the reader that "Jeffrey's Emporium" a seller of good magical and mundane was having their yearly tournament LOOT. Where the magical shape shifting dungeon of It'Dupree the Lich baroness was opened for a single day to anyone brave and insane enough to storm its depths. Whoever returns from the dungeons depths at the end of the 24 hour period with the most magical gear from dead adventurers would win a fabulous prize. 50,000 gold and other accolades.
there is doubtlessly more on that page but as Terquem has yet to fill in all the blanks we shall just pretend for now.

"That's not the kind of tournament I was expecting. Where's the bloodshed? Where's the carnage? From what I'd heard about her I expected the Lich Baroness to have the participants actually killing the adventurers instead of just looting their already dead bodies. Have you encountered any others here for the tournament? Maybe the challenge, and the thrill, comes from crippling the opposition before they step foot inside the dungeon."

Tofutee laughs and points to the page again.
" See thats whats fun about living in a city with literal devils and worse for law contractors. There is absolutely going to be bloodshed. It says nothing about the adventurers needing to be dead before the tournament begins. Also for the terms of this tournament everyone participating is considered an 'Adventurer'. Everyone is a target.
I like how you think though, I had been discussing with my companion over there about what we might be able to do to tip the odds in our favor. I've yet to encounter any other groups yet but I suspect it will be more of a test to see who won't be going in there. Lots of folks go alone in hopes of getting some gold. The tournament doesn't care much about anything except magic items after all and gold is heavy."

"Hrmph. Well the vermin and I traveled a long ways and at no small expense to get here. I suppose I can endure a few days of boredom in the interest of the glory and mayhem to come at this tournament. Is your group rooming here or somewhere else? And which inn has the best food and best whores? I don't plan to spend days here, without distraction, and not have my appetites sated."

Tofutee tilts her head seeming to need a second to think before looking at the ground and making a small noise of comprehension. "Right those things I don't do." the plant woman states blandly before looking back up at the horned one "I don't actually sleep so I'm not staying at any Inn. I just show up around when everyone stops taking their really long nap. I was going to suggest we use this place as a meeting place though.
It caters to adventurers and while it might not have the absolutely best food in town it will bring you whatever you ask. Heck I didn't even know alcohol made out of corn existed til Beast started looking for something like that.
There is a place with great fish at the end of the street and some really great food stalls that open in the afternoon. This place has some pretty great sipider-buffalo burgers. It'dupree's snowcone stand is pretty good. The unicorn blood snow cone is fake but it tastes really close." The baconling rambles as she signaled to the bar wench for another burger. All this talk of food.
" As to your whores, thats sex workers right? I'm honestly not sure, my race doesn't reproduce like mammals so I've never had the attraction. Our rituals are a bit more Murder-y and thats not allowed in the city proper. I know theres a doppleganger that comes around every once in a while that does that sort of stuff so long as she gets to read your mind while doing it. I imagine theres some bordellos around here somewhere but I wouldn't know as I've not gone looking for them."

"I suppose the zombie over there doesn't have much use for whores either", Ruul muses. "More for me", he adds with a shrug of his broad shoulders.

"What's your beast's story? I don't see many of them outside the fields and never inside a place like this enjoying a drink. I'm surprised no nosy paladin's tried to take him back to his master."