GM Ladile's League of Kick-Ass Dudes: A Pathfinder Society Campaign (Inactive)

Game Master Lady Ladile

"Lazarus, allow your younger, more handsome brother to assist you!" Brayden hugs a shipping crate and puts Shizuru's strength into his deadlift.

STR: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (19) + 3 = 22

The Great Escape - Round 4 Cont.

Racing up to the waiting wagons, the group immediately gets to work on sowing more chaos. As a couple of the workers spring forward to try and shoo you away from the wagons Dalen stumbles forward and loops them into an impromptu 'Three Stooges' routine, ensuring they won't be a bother to rest of you.

While that's happening, Lazarus, Brayden, and Jan proceed to load the wagons down with additional supplies - or rather, Brayden and Jan load the wagons while Lazarus pulls a muscle or two. With the wagons loaded, Meredith the Horse Whisperer manages to take control of the horses and calm them long enough to loosen the harnesses that keep them hitched to the wagons. Then, with the promise of all the carrots they can eat, the summoner urges them towards freedom! As the wagons begin to move, Frankie executes a dramatic diving slide that takes him underneath a couple of them; as he goes he gives the pins holding the axles a good solid *THUMP* before skidding to a stop in a cloud of dust.

The horses careen down the street towards freedom, pulling the overloaded wagons behind them...and then everything comes together in beautiful harmony as the harnesses holding the horses to the wagons come undone, allowing them to slip free! Sensing the enormous weight is now gone from their shoulders, the horses stampede around one corner while the wagons continue rolling onward with no one to steer them. It's about this time that the sabotaged pins break free and send several of the wagons crashing to the ground in an explosion of boxes and crates while others continue to roll on; people scream and dive out of the way as the remaining wagons crash into nearby buildings or vendor stalls!

Just as the group is beginning to wonder if they've already managed to make a clean getaway, the distant sound of whistles and shouting can be heard as Interrogator Vasenti and his men finally mobilize and join in the chase...
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Another post to follow, please stand by!

The Great Escape - Round 5

Urged to keep moving by the distant sounds of pursuit, the group continues their mad flight down another long alley before emerging at yet another large intersection. Judging from the makeshift altars and numerous black-and-red-robed figures milling about, you've arrived at the beginning of some sort of Asmodean religious rite or ceremony...
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Current Map!

Lazarus detects the sulfuric scent of the fires of Hell. Following his aquiline blue nose, the samsaran spies an assemblage of acolytes of Asmodeus.

Already bent over with spasms in his lower back, eyes closed and face screwed up with the strain, the wizard-priest bears down, squeezing out an explosive burst of positive energy.
Channel Positive Energy: 1d6 ⇒ 3

"Alright, that should slow them down!" Meredith continues. As she sees the altar, she can't help herself but leap upon the podium and begin an impromptu speech.

"And so, Asmodeus came to save us all in a time of need! He rose from his fiery home and cast away the intruders with a wave of his hand. He turned to the worshipers, laughed as they prostrated themselves in front of him and he yelled:"

Bluff: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (17) + 8 = 25

"Waffles! TASTY Waffles! With lots of syrup! Every one of my priests will offer you as many as you can eat. Come to me, and feast everlasting!"

Meredith does her best maniacal laugh as she quickly hops off the stage to escape the confused priests and the hungry crowd.

"Waffles! TASTY Waffles! With lots of syrup! Eat as much as you can!"

Not too far from Meredith, Denair is frowning.

But it's nice to see the Boss loosen up a bit.

Dalen eyes the crowd of Asmodean clergy as a reckless abandon takes over her. Her heart thunders in her chest and a part of her wants to create as much chaos as possible, then revel in it. For the first time, she understands why the fey enjoy playing tricks on mortals. It's the rush, the sheer excitement of proving that you're faster and cleverer, and the looks on your victim's faces.

A downright evil grin bares Dalen's teeth as she recalls the look of the two Asmodeans she'd literally disrobed. The woman's expression was golden, but the man's sheer embarrassment was priceless as he was left with little but small scrap of fabric to protect his dignity.

They rob others of their freedom. I suppose it's only right to rob them of their dignity, she muses as she spots what she's looking for.

A bride all in black and a groom in crimson stand before a priestess that bears a remarkable resemblance to the woman Dalen had bowled over just a few minutes ago. Next to them stand a couple of young acolytes with nice long strips of fabric and rope belts.

She taps Jan and Frankie on their shoulders as her eyes gleam wickedly.

"Can you two and Denair help me with something," Dalen asks. "I think we need to make this wedding a lot more memorable. Think the four of us can strip those five and tie them up all nice and pretty. It's only fair to rob them of their dignity after they've been robbing everyone of their freedom."

So, yeah. The food cart on a grander scale. If it's too weird, then just say so and I'll think of something else.

Frankie nods along to Dalen and works himself into the scene, removing his mustache first and ruffling his hair as appropriate "A beautiful wedding!" He quickly spots the young ring bearer and slides up next to him. They exchange a few words, then a bag of candy changes hands, along with something else...

Frankie hops up on the podium after Meredith makes her exit, his mouth drops as he looks around for the waffles and syrup before finally realizing it was just a rouse. "Ahem. I know its not quite my turn, but I'm short on time so here goes..." He turns to the bride and tears start running down his face (how does he DO THAT!)

"Mommie! Why didn't you tell me you were getting us a new Daddy? Is it because the last Daddy ran out of money? Or do I get to have two Daddy's now? Don't worry, I've got the ring whenever its time!" He holds up a glinting pair of golden wedding bands and hops down off the stage, stumbling and just catching himself. A slow motion scene cuts in as the wedding bands can be seen flying up into the air and falling with a clink.. then a splash.. down the gutter. "Ummm oops." He says before he runs off with the others.

Bluff to Fool: 1d20 + 13 ⇒ (3) + 13 = 16 That's a LOT to swallow, even from Frankie.

While Meredith then Frankie distracts the gathered crowd, Dalen nods to Jan and points to the acolytes.

"Belt and cords, then tie up the happy infernal couple," she tells him before racing off up the aisle.

CMB (Dirty Tricks): 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (8) + 5 = 13 Maaaayyyyybe?

Surprisingly deft hands grab the cords and throw them around the couple as she puts a boot to the bride's backside. A big grin is plastered to her face as she pulls the ropes tight.

"You may now kiss the– WOAH!"

Dalen's eyes go wide as the Priestess with the sour expression comes at the pathfinder with a mace and a snarl. Dalen turns and pushes off with both feet, sending the tangle of bride and groom to crash into the acolytes, and sending all four of them out of harm's way as Dalen lands on her back before the enraged Asmodean priestess.

Well, it was fun while it lasted, she thinks as she sees the mace rise into the air.

Brayden holds his katana out. "Behold, brothers and sisters! The strength of Asmodeus is within us all!"

The samsaran whispers a prayer to Shizuru.. in his head, and his blade begins to glow. Standing at an altar with a grin on his face, he holds the master sword katana up proudly. "This blade is empowered by Asmodeus' just as we all are!"

Use Holy Strike blessing if you'll allow it instead of an enchantment spell. I'll add a bluff though his bluff is pretty weak.

Bluff: 1d20 ⇒ 14

JanBot gives Dalen a curt nod before heading up another makeshift aisle and circling around the couple from behind...but is forced to sidestep out of the way as his companion's antics send not only the couple but a couple of acolytes tumbling to the ground in a heap.

Changing course he instead charges towards the Asomdean priestess threatening Dalen...

CMB (Disarm): 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (19) + 6 = 25

...and delivers a surprisingly agile flying kick that knocks the mace out of her hand!

"Now this is more like the weddings we have back home!"

The Great Escape - Round 5 Cont.

Once again the group displays a surprising amount of teamwork and quick thinking as they play havoc on the wedding they've just crashed. Meredith gets the show started by elbowing past the wedding party and officiating priest to hop up onto the altar! The wedding attendees are momentarily shocked into inaction, allowing Meredith a moment to speak a few words about their Lord and Savoir Asmodeus and the bounty of never-ending waffles and syrup he provides to his loyal followers.

"That's not in the scriptures!" a cantankerous old man hollers from somewhere in back.

Brayden then attempts to add to the effect by holding his sword skyward, calling upon a 'blessing' to Asmodeus to make his weapon one that will pierce the heavens - and the waffles!

"That's not in the scriptures either!" bellows the same old man from the back of the crowd. "Don't they teach you kids anything in school?"

Meanwhile, Frankie thinks back to a performance he'd seen of the famous Barry Klinger Show once in Absalom. He'd not gotten to see the whole thing before Meredith had managed to pull him away but he remembered bits and pieces - something about daddies? And chair-throwing, lots of chair-throwing. Deciding to see if he can stage a reenactment with the help of the wedding party, he pops up next to the bride and calls into question her decision to wear white - among other things. The groom's face begins to flush red and he seems ready to commence with the chair-throwing until his bridee suddenly slaps him hard across the face.

"Are you blind?? That's a halfling, not a child! What's wrong with you!?" she shrieks, terribly offended that her one-and-only would even have considered that she might have been unfaithful.

"OW! Hey, stop it! He kinda looked like you s-oof!"

Anything else the pair might've said to each other are cut short as they're suddenly lassoed by Dalen, who's then forced to abort her plan and sending them tumbling to the ground as the officiating priestess finally has enough of this garbage and draws her weapon. She wields her mace more like a samurai sword, standing over Dalen and waving it high in the air.

"I have had enough of thiiiiiiis!"

But before she can strike the prone Dalen, Jan comes in with a flying boot to the hand and kicks the mace out of the priestess' hand, sending it flying into the crowd of guests. And, to add insult to injury and top off the festivities, Lazarus clambers atop the altar and drops a divine deuce in Desna's name - which makes him feel a lot better in more ways than one.

Their work done, the group hurriedly extricates themselves from the tangled chaos that is the wedding and continues their mad flight toward the docks. From a ways off they can hear the continued sounds of mobilizing guards, whistles, baying hounds...but the group is certain they've still got a fair lead on them, estimating that they're only just now getting to the mess of a parade they'd left behind...
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Another post incoming, please stand by!

The Great Escape - Round 6

As the group races on, the smell of sea and salt growing stronger as they get closer to the docks, they come upon yet another live event - a band! A street-side band performs on a corner next to a dingy-looking tavern, playing Chelish anthems to a growing (and likely inebriated) crowd...
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Current Map!

By the way, did I mention your pursuers would normally move 3 squares a round to your 1 if it weren't for all the shenanigans? :3

Frankie spies a set of drums and his heart nearly stops Mom always hated when I played the drums.. but they're so fun and I'm wicked awesome at them! He heads over and asks the nice man if I can get them a go. "Please Mister, I'm real good, super good! Mind if I play?" Before he even has a chance to consider the request, somehow his drum sticks are in Frankie's hands.

"Thanks Mister!" He shouts as he starts it up. Slowly at first but building speed. Before long he's really beating the crap out of those drums.. and sticks... and that's about it. But you wouldn't know it, looks like he's singing along and having the time of his life. "THANK YOU NEW YORK!" He screams, tossing the sticks up in the air and taking off.

Perform Drums Untrained, Heroism, lesser persuasion: 1d20 + 4 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 4 + 2 + 2 = 13

"Chileax! Ho!"
"Where the beer always flows."
"And the flames always goes!"
"Chileax is the home"
"The grandest place for glory to flow!"

Perform: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4

Meredith tries to make a rousing song celebrating Chileax, but she lacks practice.

While Jan's intervention had saved her, Dalen's crash landing from dodging the Priestess' mace had knocked the breath from her and she lags behind the others.

At least until she hears an enraged priestess and an enraged noblewoman shrieking, "YOU!" as they point at and pursue her with single-minded intensity. The familial resemblance is uncanny as they snarl in fury.

Not good! Not good!

Dex: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (20) + 3 = 23

She turns and bounces off of a large man with a round belly and an alcohol-reddened face just as they launch themselves at her. She stumbles back between the two wrathful old women, then tucks her legs under her as she rolls under the table and pops back to her feet. The unfortunate drunk howls in pain as fingernails like tiny daggers claw at his face before he's tossed aside. The two women look around, lips pursed and eyes wild with rage.

Dalen doesn't wait to see if they spot her and runs like mad. She clambers up onto the stage as if the barrels holding it were merely steps up to a porch. The woman spot her and follow along, determined that this troublemaker wasn't going to get away. The young woodswoman dives over Frankie as he shouts his farewell to New York, wherever that was, and somersaults down the other side with all of the grace and agility her uncle had trained into her. The acrobatics buy her enough time to make it to the crowd, but she's not more than a few steps ahead of the priestess and the noblewoman. Desperately, she looks for anyway to slow them down, but most of the crowd is moving out of the way as fast as they can.

Thankfully, one thing that's always true no matter where you go is young lovers being young lovers and oblivious to the world around them while in each other's company. She finds a pair of Asmodean alcotlyes (Are these guys just everywhere!) and pulls the handsome young man from his equally attractive girlfriend and literally tosses him into the two women chasing her. The young woman barely has time to get out an indignant "Hey!" before she's pulled along by Dalen.

"Hey! What are you doing?!"

"Something that's about to get you into a lot of trouble," Dalen answers as she stops, turns the acolyte around, and shoves her right into the priestess lips first. Some time bought, Dalen makes a mad dash to catch up to the others.

The quick-witted samsaran casts prestidigitation, making a small black hole appear in his chest. "Sid, poke your head out!" Lazarus whispers, desperate.

The wizard-priest's familiar looks out from his master's silk robes, big floppy ears twitching and cute little red eyes glowing with ire. "WHAT THE F+*! ARE YOU WAKING ME UP FOR? For the last time, I'm NOT your F$$*ING SOCK PUPPET!"

To the gathered crowd, it appears that a thin blue man with all-white eyes has a live rabbit emerging from his sternum.

Thank Desna, no one can understand Sid's potty mouth.

(Not actually a level-1 illusion spell, but it might look that way to the drunken music-lovers.)

(Jan, who has never enjoyed the pleasantries of civil society, navigates the crowd in the traditionally accepted 'Ulfen' way), "Get out of my way or I'll bash your F#@%ing skulls in!"

(Jan moves through the crowd *per the mechanic*, but would much prefer to shove his way through if at all possible).

"Opokkuligr Heidinn!"

Dex Check: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 2 = 14

Brayden throws his arm behind his head and scratches.

Perhaps a little mincing of words might help your cause?

"Er, yes. What my Ulfen friend here said. If you wish to maintain those braincases of yours, I suggest you vacate the area. Posthaste."

Dex: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 = 4

The Great Escape - Round 6 Cont.

Perhaps the group is growing winded from the chase or maybe they're just running out of ideas, as their efforts to cause further disruption with the street performers don't seem to go as well as planned. Both Meredith and Frankie attempt to insert themselves into the performance directly but everyone quickly realizes that Meredith can't carry a tune in a bucket and while Frankie's flailing on the drums is technically better than it has any right to be, it's still not quite enough to really impress very many in the crowd.

"An alley cat sings better'n you!"

"Hah! He's beatin' those drums like they owe 'im money!"

"Aw, I thought it was pretty good...HEY! HEY! FREEBIRD! DO FREEBIRD!"

With Meredith and Frankie's attempts to work the crowd up falling flat, Jan and Brayden decide to take a more direct approach and begin trying to push, shove, and weave their way through the crowd and clear a path for the escapees...but who knew drunken revelers were so hard to get moving? Even with Jan shoving and hollering threats and Brayden asking more nicely, the music-loving crowd proves difficult to budge and they're not able to make much headway.

Luckily, Dalen and Lazarus are there to save the day! As Frankie finishes his drum solo, Dalen comes climbing onto the stage and dives past him and into the crowd to escape the wrath of what might possibly be the two sourest-looking women in all of Cheliax. With the Twisted Sisters hot on her heels, Dalen takes advantage of the terrain - such as it as - as she was taught and grabs a young couple, throwing them to the proverbial wolves in order to make good her escape.

As the young couple and the Twisted Sisters begin screaming at each other, and the rotund man from earlier joining in, it's enough to pull the attention of a sizable part of the crowd away from the band and to the potential fight brewing in their midst. A few of them, with red and bleary eyes, look around and suddenly seem to notice Lazarus for the first time, Sid peering angrily from what appears to be a hole in the middle of his chest.

"Like...whoa, dude! Is that a real rabbit?"

"Hey man, like...can we pet him?"

"Is...wow...haha...that Pineapple Express was worth the coin, haha! Hey, anyone got a carrot???"

They inexplicably seem more fascinated than terrified or disgusted, but that's not especially surprising, considering the pungent, smoky smell that emanates from them. Either way, the crowd is thrown into further disarray as more and more come forward to see the magical rabbit that may or may not actually be piloting a blue man-suit...allowing everyone to finally slip away in the confusion. Although they're certain they're still being pursued, it seems like the group might be pulling ahead as the cries of the guards seems to grow further and further away...

The Great Escape - Round 7

Racing onwards, the Pathfinders and their charges are filled a surge of hope - the docks! Only a block or two away now, surely they're almost home free...but no! To their horror, they see that word of the prison break must have spread quickly throughout the city as they see numerous city guard beginning to block off the streets!

With little other choice, the group ducks into the first building that they come across, a dingy tavern. As soon as they stumble inside they're greeted by the stink of smoke, cheap ale, and unwashed bodies, as well as...cheers? Wait, no, it's not them being cheered, but the pair of boxers currently battling it out in the middle of the tavern's fighting pit...
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Current Map

Frankie runs along, the sounds of the drums still vibrating his eardrums and a smile across his face I was totally awesome there!

He ducks into the bar behind Meredith Oh another bar, smells like Mom! His eyes go wide as he sees the fight down below, his smile turning a bit to a scowl as he sees the larger man beating down the smaller. "NO FAIR!" He screams.

He jumps up on a table and points to the big fella "HEY! If you wanna fight someone, you should fight HIM!" He points at their Ulfen escaped slave friend Jan. "Or are you too chicken!" Followed by the inevitable clucking and flapping on the table top.

Intimidate, heroism, persuasion circlet: 1d20 + 4 + 2 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 4 + 2 + 2 = 10

Meredith glares at the crowd before moving on towards the docks. Freedom is only a few blocks away... dammit, the blockade!

She stumbles into the fighting arena and realizes she'll have to get through the crowd somehow.

Intimidate: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (6) + 2 = 8

"Get out of my way! Uh.. please."
All of this attention is getting to her nerves. What kind of queen can't show herself in public like this?

Seeing one of the brawlers land a vicious upper cut to her opponent, Lazarus pulls out his pocket 'lazor' and activates it. A magic missile slams into the bruiser.

Force Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4 (41 charges remaining.)

"Here!

Attack (fist non-lethal): 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (9) + 9 = 18

Damage (non-lethal): 1d3 + 5 ⇒ (3) + 5 = 8

"Stop your crying... shut up or I will give you another one!"

"Cut it out, friends! We are all friends of Asmdoeus, let us settle this in the proper, lawful way!"

Whatever that is?

He holds his blade flat-side forward and swings it...

Katana, nonlethal: 1d20 + 4 - 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 - 4 = 2

Unarmed strike: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (13) + 5 = 18
Damage (Nonlethal): 1d3 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6

Dalen takes a moment to look for a way through the crowd, hoping that she squeeze by without trouble. Alas it was not meant to be. barely a minute after they'd come in, the doors slam open and the Twisted Sisters, having replaced their formerly sour expressions with ones of incensed rage, look about with wide and wild eyes. Their once find clothing is in taters, revealing scrawny legs and arms. One carries a set of fetters and manacles and the other carries an iron slave's collar and a whip. Where they'd gotten them and how they'd managed to get away from the brewing argument so quickly are far less important to Dalen than the fact that they look ready and willing to use those items and that they are looking for her.

They spot her. Their eyes lock for just a moment, then Dalen moves first, hopping onto the tables and racing across them towards the pit. Patrons hoot and holler, too drunk to notice or care about the brewing trouble behind them. The Twisted Sisters curse and spit as they follow on her heels, tossing aside people and chairs. They almost catch Dalen with a lunge, but the young ranger is faster, leaping into the pit and breaking up the fight brewing between the others and the fighters. The Twisted Sisters follow, scrambling down into the pit with the others, hands taloned as they reach for Dalen only to meet Dalen's fist as she throws a haymaker right into the priestess' teeth.

The Great Escape - Round 7 Cont.

Although the group might be running a bit low on steam, it's thankfully not very difficult to get a bunch of drunks in a tavern riled up. The fighters in the pit seem more amused than anything by Meredith's squeaking for them to get out of the way, the bigger of the two laughing derisively as he delivers a powerful right cross to the smaller.

"Hah! Best run on home girlie - unless you wanna be next!"

Said fighter also looks less than impressed when Frankie leaps upon a nearby table and helpfully volunteers Jan as an opponent instead. "Yeah, whatever little man, maybe when I'm-URGH!" he says, starting to turn away only to receive a powerful punch to the back of the head courtesy of Jan. He straightens up and turns, fury in his eyes.

"Alright, you wanna fight? I'll take you and him both," he growls, jerking his thumb at his original opponent. The burly fighter dives for Jan but stumbles, his momentum carrying him over the rail and into a nearby table of spectators, who all begin yelling and cursing as they find themselves drenched in ale. "You'll pay fer thaaaat...!" one of them slurs drunkenly, swinging a haymaker at the fighter but striking his friend instead...and things only get worse from there. Dalen comes racing across the tables, kicking up mugs and dishes as she's pursued by the Twisted Sisters; she dives into the pit and lands between Meredith and the smaller of the two original fighters, keeping her companion from harm. And as the Twisted Sisters follow into the fighting pit, one of them receives a punch in the teeth for her trouble while the second stumbles over her torn, ragged dress and crashes into the smaller fighter, sending them both crashing to the ground.

In the blink of an eye the tavern erupts into a full-on barroom brawl, fists flying, chairs flying, people being thrown into tables, the works. Brayden attempts to club a patron that's getting up in Krima's face, only to be beaten to the punch as Zefiro, of all people, breaks a bottle over the man's head! Lazarus surreptitiously zaps one of the brawlers with his 'lazor', eliciting a shriek of, "Eeee! It's a witch! There's a witch in here!" which sends some of the brawlers running for the door, causing a massive logjam at the entrance...and allowing the group to low-crawl under tables and behind the bar and out the back door...

The Great Escape - Round 8

After escaping the tavern brawl, the group stumble out into a back alley and hurry away before the guard can mobilize and start blocking off the smaller side streets as well. With freedom now within their grasp the Pathfinders and their charges practically fly the remaining few blocks to the docks, feet barely touching the ground as they go. Rounding a corner they finally reach the Ostenso Harbor...and there! At the very end of the far pier, a ship! Their ship, their ticket home!

But the docks are bustling with workers, sailors, and members of Ostenso's finest...
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Current Map!

My kingdom for more than 2 skill points per level...

Con: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5
Holding his pants up, Brayden bends his knees to forty-five degrees and pushes hard off the cobblestone ground with all of his might.

His heart pounding in his chest, the samsaran continues on. He can see the sails now, and it only makes him run faster. His armor slows him down, and sweat trickles down his face in swaths of blue goop, but his determination knows no bounds. And so he bounds and leaps across the pier.

His balance, however, isn't so steady. As he steps too close to a cracked stone, the bottom of his pants catch on a sharp edge. The next step he takes sends him tumbling on his face with a horrible RRRRIIPP, and there lies one scraped, bruised, pantsless samsaran.

Frankie creeps out of the bar and just keeps on creeping. He tugs on Denair's fur and whispers "Time to play hide n seek!" He gives her a small low five and goes into stealth mode.

Stealth: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (13) + 12 = 25

Meredith looks. It's time for a swim.

Swim: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (12) + 3 = 15

She slips right in and starts swimming. The sooner she reaches the ship, the better.

Stealth: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (14) + 8 = 22 Yay!

Dalen takes to the hidden paths and shadows, moving as silently as she ever did stalking deer. From crate, to barrel, to tarp she moves and hides like a whisper or a passing shadow in the night.

Unfortunately, the Twisted sisters are there once again. Both now wearing little more than rags of expensive cloth. They'd been battered, bloodied, and bruised, but they would never cease in their hunt for the troublemaker.

"She has to be around here somewhere!"

"I know. I know! The tarted up trollop must be making her escape. We'll find her sister mine, then we'll take our time."

Dalen, tired, hungry, and fed up with Cheliax slips up onto a stack of crates and follows the two of them like a cat. They never suspect a thing as she slips down braces against the lip of a massive tun. The Twisted Sisters scream as Dalen plants her boots on their backs and shoves with all of her might to push them off the docks. As they come cursing and spluttering to the surface, Dalen vanishes and resumes her quiet trek to the ship.

Up to the GM if they do the Wicked Witch of the West thing. :P

"Blue feets, don't fail me now!" The samsaran hikes up his robes, and skinny legs churning like a road runner, he hauls butt for the boat.
CON check: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

Lazarus slips on a rotten banana peel, tumbles ass-over-teakettle, and skids to a street-stained, grimy halt. "Ouch!"

Shaking off his embarrassment, he lurches to his feet and stumbles after his friends.

"Run, Lazarus, Run!"

(Knowing that a Northman's endurance is greater than most, Jan hangs back slightly in case someone needs help)- *OCC, Jan will stay towards the back of the lineup.*

CON Check (Running): 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (8) + 6 = 14

The Great Escape - Round 8 Cont.

The Pathfinders and the escaped prisoners stumble onto the docks and not a moment too soon, as nearly everyone proves to be winded and out of breath. Everyone discovers that apparently blue men can't run, as both Lazarus and Brayden stumble and fall as they make a break for the ship. Pants are ripped, robes are tangled, and everyone in the vicinity is treated to the sight of pale legs and scrawny samsaran man-booty...which elicits mostly groans and one or two scattered whistles from some of the dock workers who like that sort of thing.

Meredith decides to take to the water, diving in and hoping to avoid the obstacle course of humanity and goods scattered all along the docks. Although she's a decently fair swimmer, the currents around the dock are surprisingly strong and the summoner finds it difficult to make much headway.

Frankie has better luck, deciding to blend into the shadows and use the numerous stacked crates and barrels dotting the docks for cover. The little halfling (with Denair trying to balance a pace that keeps her close to Frankie but not too far from Meredith) has no trouble at all making his way down the length of the docks until he finally reaches the ship! Now to wait and make sure that everyone else makes it too...

Meanwhile, Dalen also creeps along the docks but can't resist figuratively thumbing her nose one final time as the Twisted Sisters stagger out onto the docks, refusing to give up their pursuit of the young woman who's caused them so much grief and embarrassment. Waiting until just the right moment, Dalen expertly boots both of them off the docks and into the water below, their screams of surprise and outrage surely heard all the way in Kintargo and Corentyn! The unplanned swim finally seems to break their spirits as they wail in defeat...and utter a stream of curses foul enough to make a sailor blush. Finally free of her two special pursuers, Dalen isn't far behind Frankie as she too makes it to the ship in one piece...

And last but not least, Jan clanks along at the rear of the group - normally a sprint like this wouldn't faze him but it proves to be a little more difficult to manage when he's forced to haul the Blue Man Group up on their feet and drag them along with him. Still, even with the strong currents and clumsy samsaran allies, you've all got enough of a lead that you're able to rally and reach the ship!

Chase Sequence Concluded!
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Another post incoming, please stand by...

Huffing and puffing, bruised and wet, you're all able to finally make it to your getaway ship, the Queen Gale. Tamrin Credence is there waiting for you and he races down the gangplank to help pull everyone aboard.

"There you are! I was beginning to worry that you wouldn't make it but here you all are - and I really do mean all!" he exclaims, his eyes widening first with surprise and then delight as he realizes that you've not only escaped with Krima but Zefiro but also Dyrom, Laila, and Opheri. "I don't know what you did but they've not caught up to us yet - and I don't intended to let them catch us now! Come on, all aboard! We sail for Andoran!"

And so thanks to the chaos the group managed to sew on their madcap flight through Ostenso's streets, the Queen Gale is afforded enough time to weigh anchor and depart from the city's docks without being stopped. By the time Interrogator Vasenti and his men finally make it to the docks they're only small specks on the horizon as your getaway ship quickly catches the wind and speeds away.

Once it becomes clear that you've managed a clean escape and that there are no ships in pursuit, everyone is able to breath a collective sigh of relief, even Tamrin. From his position near the ship's deck, Zefiro stares across the horizon towards the city you just escaped and then slowly turns to you.

"My friends...I thought that I would surely die there in that hole," he manages, his voice becoming choked with emotion once more. "How can I ever repay you for what you've done?"

There's a small chuckle from Dyrom. "Heh...that's a good question and one I'd like to know the answer to myself. We all probably would've died there if it hadn't been for you folks. Thanks for busting us out - the Network definitely owes you one!"

Denair pulls Meredith out of the docks, safely aboard the ship. "Mmm, salty!" Denair feels the water along her fingertips.

Meredith, meanwhile, turns to watch the Chileax coastline fade away. "Sorry Zefiro. I don't think you can curate that museum anymore. But maybe you'll find a spot in the Blakros museum. And maybe Paracountess Zarta will have some questions for you. Not the painful kind, though." She grins and goes to hug him. "We Pathfinders don't leave anyone behind."

"As for the rest of you, you're free now." She turns to the Bellflowers and any other prisoners who followed them onto the ship. "You don't owe me anything, but I'm glad to help. Freedom is a right, I'm just restoring yours." She smiles at Tamrin, he revealed his true colors and she's thankful.

"Good job, Frankie." She ruffles the kid's hair. "We wouldn't have gotten them out so quickly without your help. I don't know where your mother is, but we'll figure it out one of these days." She looks at some of the prisoners. "Is-is that the Ulfen guy who escaped? The one you kept hollering about?"

---

Meredith rests easy that night. Not only did she save people's lives, but it felt good to lead, even if she didn't know everything. Maybe Denair is onto something with all of this talk about being a queen.

Frankie pops up on deck from behind some crates, his disguise wiped away and a smile on his face and a mug in his hand. "Wooo we all made it! Cocoa for everyone!" He races around and gives EVERYONE high fives. The party, the escapees, and of course the crew and Tamrin. He gives Zephiro a special hug "Welcome back Gramps!" He says, lingering for a few extra seconds before dragging Denair down to the galley to start making a huge pot of celebratory cocoa for everyone.

Once they return topside, lugging a giant pot between them and a box of mugs, Frankie plops it all down and sits hard, finally getting a bit worn out. (For a few minutes at least before the sugar and caffeine will kick in.) He stares off towards the disappearing shoreline and scowls for just a moment before his happy go lucky smile returns. I'll be back, I'm sure there's more jails to be freed!

He sips on his cocoa and holds up a pair of vials... huh? "Who wants to play cards!" Frankie gives Meredith a smile when she ruffles his little boy haircut. "Ya, I'm sure we'll find her sometime. No rush, this is way more fun anyhow."

Queue alternate ending where Frankie poisoned the cocoa and everyone passes out, only to be thrown overboard and fed to the sharks. Or maybe tied up to be returned to prison... nah.

"Gozreh has blessed all of you with freedom... do not waste it!"

(Jan's right hand raises to clutch the holy symbol of Gozreh which adorns his neck), "If any of you wish to learn more about the Father of Storms and Seasons...". (Jan trails off, his unease at proslytization readily apparent).

(Glad not to be a prisoner in some Cheliaxian gulag, Jan acts out in the only way appropriate to an Ulfen warrior... way too much mead and raucous singing).

Dayjob(Hunting Lodge): 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (12) + 9 = 21

A tired Dalen shuffles towards their cabin after they'd made good their escape. All she wants right now is to sleep.

"Maybe later, Jan," she says as the ship's swaying reminds her of sitting in her aunt's lap as she rocked her to sleep as a child.

The next time any of the others see her, she's curled up in her hammock fast asleep, looking at ease for the first time since this whole debacle began.

Lazarus smiles at his friends and the freed prisoners, enjoying the calm sea voyage and the long-overdue respite.

The samsaran yawns, looking for a hammock on the fo'c'stle, where he could lie back, gaze up at the distant stars with his all-white eyes and confer in blessed silence with Desna, Starsong, until he could finally drift into sleep, continuing his communion with Desna, Tender of Dreams.

Free and thankful to be alive, Pathfinders, Bellflowers, former prisoners, and even Zefiro celebrate long into the night, turning the Queen Gale into a veritable party boat - filled with singing, drinking (of cocoa and other, harder beverages), and even some dancing. For those who slip away early to sleep, the noise coming from elsewhere in the ship doesn't disturb you and you sleep peacefully as the ship travels on through the night - a blessing from the Tender of Dreams herself.
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It takes you only a couple of days on the water to reach your destination - Almas, capital of the free nation of Andoran. It's quite the large and bustling city, much like Absalom, and features its own Pathfinder Lodge, located in the city's East Hill District. After disembarking from the Queen Gale it's only a short walk from the docks to the lodge, where Venture-Captain Dennel Hamshanks and Zarta Dralneen await you.

"Well! Not only do I see our dear ally Zefiro among your ranks but several other delectable morsels," Zarta smiles widely as everyone files into the large meeting room. "And Master Credence," she adds almost as an afterthought. "Yes, yes, it's a pleasure to see you again too, Zarta," Tamrin replies, rolling his eyes a bit.

Hamshanks strides forward, furiously shaking each of your hands before you take your seats at the table. "Hell, I'm happy to see everyone," he remarks. "And looking not too terribly worse for the wear at that! You succeeded in rescuing Zefiro - that much is obvious - but what happened, exactly? Were you able to recover anything else of interest from the Blood Nail?"

Meredith plops on a chair. "The Bellflower Network associates are secure. We also rescued a few of the native prisoners, mostly minor crimes."

"Hey Lazarus, did you want to tell Zarta about the documents we found, or should I?"

Frankie smiles and gives everyone a nice hug, happy to be back on dry land and away from Chelish soil. "Hey, we made it! And we brought friends!" He hops up on curiously placed stool, his little feet dangling and swinging carefree.

His eyes light up as he sits more at attention, spying a bowl of hard candy atop the nearby VCs desk. "Ooo what kinda documents? I guess I never really paid much attention to that bit.. tell us more Laz." He says, letting his voice trail off and shifting attention away from himself... a classic technique..

Bluff to Distract: 1d20 + 12 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 12 + 2 = 19
Sleight of Hand vs Candy...: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (11) + 14 = 25

The next time you look at the kid he's got a mouthful of something and smile on his face. "Tell usth more.." He mumbles, the sounds of a handful of hard candies rattling against his teeth.

For the first time in a long time, Brayden sheathes his sword. Stepping off the ship, the samsaran instead wielded a glint in his eye and a grin on his face. "It is so good to be back. I must say, Zarta, I felt we were a little in over our heads for a moment there. What a rotten prison. Though I suppose all prisons are rotten in some way..." He raises a hand to his chin in thought.

"In any case, we succeeded! Lazarus, brother, why don't you tell our Venture-Captain here about the trove of documents?"

Dalen lets the others take the lead, praying silently that Zarta wouldn't take notice of her.

At the urging of his companions, Lazarus nods and steps forward, toward the venture-captain and interposing himself physically between Zarta and the reluctant Dalen.

"Paracountess, during the course of our investigations and at grave personal risk, we discovered the following letter that will undoubtedly interest you. The interrogator Vasenti has uncovered dangerous information regarding your operations and conveyed his suspicions to Inspector Lusarious Deckland. Your life may be in jeopardy, especially if you were to return to Cheliax."

He offers Zarta Dralneen the rest of the recovered documents. As he hands her the last, he dares to wink. "May I congratulate you on your distinguished heritage?"

Then his expression turns serious. "Even more reason for you to avoid Cheliax for a while."

Mindful of Dalen behind him, trying to fade into the wall, the samsaran wizard-priest holds his arms out, encompassing his less reticent friends. "We have assembled a fine, cohesive team. It would be a shame not to keep us together for future missions on behalf of the Pathfinder Society."

He leans forward to kiss the back of the Paracountess's hand. "And, of course, with the interests of the Dark Archive in capable, em, blue hands," Lazarus adds in a whisper.

Oh! Is this Zarta lady Lazarus's Queen? Is that we he keeps whispering secrets? Dawn yawns a bit, resuming her favorite pasttime of looking like a fox pelt with branches sticking out.

Stealth: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (3) + 14 = 17

As Lazarus explains the finer details of your experiences inside the Blood Nail - and the mad dash to the docks afterwards - Hamshanks, Zarta, and Tamrin all listen quite intently. Upon reassurance that the group was able to not only rescue Zefiro (and the Bellflower agents) but also his secret histories, Hamshanks gives Lazarus a slap on the back that nearly knocks the skinny samsaran off his feet.

"Hah! Valsin and Dralneen here were right about you lot," he laughs, looking quite pleased with the group's results. "Sounds like you all work well together, in spite of uh...some of your differences," Hamshanks remarks, looking at the two blue men, the scruffy Ulfen, the young woodswoman, the summoner and her companion, and the 'child'. "That's what the Society's all about - Explore, Report, and Cooperate. Especially with each other. I don't think it'll be a problem at all to find more work for you as a team. In fact, I've got a few missives from other Venture-Captains looking for capable agents...so give me a few days and I'll see what I can come up with."

Zefiro and Tamrin both nod their agreement with Hamshanks' assessment. "These six agents here have done more for me and the cause of truth than I can put into words," Zefiro adds, quite earnestly. "I have no doubt that they can accomplish any task that you might set before them."

"Yeah, what he said," Tamrin grins. "You should've seen the mess they made of Ostenso on their way out! Couldn't have done better myself...and that's saying a lot," he winks at Zarta, who gives him a disdainful look.

But everyone present gets even more than they bargained for when Lazarus goes on to elaborate on the content found in some of the documents liberated from the Blood Nail, specifically that of Zarta's true heritage. Hamshanks and Zefiro are both left wide-eyed and slack-jawed, while Tamrin utters a low whistle. "Damn...so you mean we've got a contender for the throne of Cheliax sitting in front of us? Didn't see that coming," the halfling remarks, also quite surprised.
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Two-parter post, please stand by~