DaWay's We Be Goblins! (Inactive)

Game Master DaWay

As soon as you mount squeaky nots he bucks and kicks you off. Reflex save please.

Anyone else care to ride or try again?

Reflex- 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20

Ghlurb snickers, but does not step forward to try his own luck... yet.

Nenus you are ok, and have little more than hurt pride and a soggy bottom.

If there are no other takers I will update on Monday. If there are I will deal with that as it comes up.

Bregnac watches and sees that she must show what she is made of, being a priestess Zarongel does have some responsibilities after all. "I be next on Squealy Nord!" She tosses her shield on the ground and squirms out of her scale armor, left standing in her felt clothing.

The goblin woman clutches her holy symbol and asks Zarongel for his blessings to show she is worthy. (Cast Guidance.)

Once the piglette is brought about and is in as calm as a state as it may get she readies herself and climbs up and rides, "Show me what you got Nord!" ((Ride check 1d20 + 7 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 7 + 1 = 28))

((Nice time for a 20! *grin*))

Reflex save. 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (16) + 6 = 22

"Blasted piggy! I make ya inta pork bits sum'day!"

Bregnac mounts Squealy Nord who bucks and runs as fast as it can, taking sharp turns and stopping short but Bregnac holds on tight.

Ok Bregnac lets see another two ride checks and hopefully you can last 18 seconds on squealy nord.

Ponk howls with glee, hopping from foot to foot, as he watches the entertainment.

The goblin lass squeals with goblin glee... She holds on tight for the ride and prays that Zarongel gives her the strength and luck to continue.
((Ride Checks 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (14) + 7 = 21 and 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (8) + 7 = 15))

Very good, dis Dragon Brew Gourd fur you.as one of the goblins hands you a clay gourd. But I has another challenge for you. Chief says if you can eat an entire bag of Bull slugs reel quick like he will loan you him weapon the Gorge of Gluttons By this time you are gathering an impressive crowd cheering you on.

This challenge consists of eating 5 bull slugs in a minute. Each slug is a full round action to eat. Because these slugs are foul tasting, and because of the slim, difficult to chew. Successfully eating one will require a FORT save per slug. Or you can make it easier, lower fort save, and not spit out the slime bladder and swallow whole but will require a more diffult fort save at the end.

Ghlurb licks his lips, placing his turtle-shield across his lap as he collapses into a seated position. He licks his dagger, a fire in his eyes, and gestures wildly to the shield. When the slugs have been deposited, he grins wickedly and digs in.

Ghlurb tries his best to spit the bladders at various passerby, as he does not particularly like their taste, and has no problem crunching down on the sickly-looking slugs.

I'm just gonna make a ****load of Fort saves, and you can adjudicate the results.
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 = 10
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (20) + 6 = 26
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (6) + 6 = 12
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (18) + 6 = 24
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (17) + 6 = 23
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (13) + 6 = 19
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (15) + 6 = 21
Fort:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9
That should be one minute of saves.

"Never try bull slugs before... Grulo in for this game!"

All at regular save, whatever that is.
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (12) + 4 = 16
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (18) + 4 = 22
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 4 = 14
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (16) + 4 = 20
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6
Fort: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (14) + 4 = 18

Ghlurb sits down and starts slurping down the bullworms one at a time as the crowd chants Go! Go! Go!. Taking the time to spit out the bladders at the gathering crowds but even that is no deterrent to the excitement of watching him eat not one, not two, but five bull slugs. It takes him down to the last few seconds to devour them all. Spitting the first one out two times, before slurping it down after pinching off his nose. Then forgetting his tactic spits out the second one once and getting it down the second time. Then swallowing the third and fourth in a row. Spitting out the fifth one before getting the challenge over with.

After its all said and done one of the chief's assistance brings you a dogslicer. Because I don't want to mess with the adjusting the stats later it is a +1 dogslicer but against horses it is a +3 horsebane dogslicer

The Goblin who brought you the dogslicer comes and says, Chief's next challenge fur you is fur dis And he holds up a ring in his fingers looking at you through the hole. Dis is chief's own mist akle ring that lets you climb real good. Now the next game is hide or get clubbed. The person who wants take dare runs and hides. Then we go find you with club and whack you. If we don't find you. You get ring. Now one you go hide and I count He turns and covers his eyes so he can peek through the fingers One, Too, Free, Five...

Ghlurb chuckles darkly. As the goblin turns his back, Ghlurb wrenches the club free from his grip, bringing the wooden object crashing down double-fisted on the hapless goblin's oversized head with a roar.
1d20 + 5 ⇒ (14) + 5 = 19 disarm/steal
1d20 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 1 = 151d6 + 7 ⇒ (3) + 7 = 10 nonlethal attack

As the goblin drops senseless to the ground, Ghlurb howls with victory.
Ghlub win, Ghlurb hide. Ghlurb not get clubbed. Stupid dent-head not find Ghlurb while staring at dirt.

If anyone else succeeded the slug challenge, specifically Grulo, Ghlurb tosses them the Dogslicer unceremoniously, as he can make neither head nor tails of the weapon.

Unfortunately that won't work as there is still a crowd with clubs waiting for ONE of the heroes to hide.

Some of the goblins start laughing and then another starts counting six, sivin, ate...

Just saw your post Grulo, you passed the challenge too, so you and Ghlurb can decide who gets the horsebane dogslicer

If he doesn't want it, I'll gladly take it. I beat his time, anyway. ;)

Grulo catches the dogslicer Ghlurb chucks at him, slicing his fingers a bit and fumbling it about before he grins wickedly, stroking the filthy blade lovingly. "Kill so many horses much better with you, pretty blade. Chops their legs and stab their guts..."

Grulo spends the rest of his evening burping loudly and polishing his shiny new sword.

Ponk scampers off, finding a dense group of reeds to crouch in and hide.

When he finds a spot, he'll look for another place nearby, like a hollow or some brush, that would make a good hiding place. Then he'll cast grease in that area before hunkering down to wait.

Stealth check:1d20 + 6 ⇒ (9) + 6 = 15

"Ponk good hider. They never find me here..."

You hide and watch multiple tribal members pass you by and many slip up on your grease and the ones who didn't trip over one another. Until one spots you and says Ha See Ponk and comes over and clubs you

attack1d20 - 2 ⇒ (9) - 2 = 7
Nonlethal damage 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1

Try again or someone else?

If no other players try this game, I'll volunteer, but I'll not keep any winnings, if I win, to make things more fair.

Again, I'm only doing this if nobody else wins.

Stealth 1d20 + 19 ⇒ (18) + 19 = 37

Seeing everyone fail to the clubbers, Grulo sighs, then burps again.

"Grulo give tribe lesson in hidin' good. Gooder than anyone. You watch, and try maybe copy next time you need be sneaky." Then Grulo scampers off into the underbrush, silent as an owl, nearly blending into the surrounding foliage, then disappearing from sight.

If Grulo does the contest and wins:

Grulo holds the ring up triumphantly, then tosses it at Ghlurb. "Like trade, for sword you not want. I like sword, don't like rings much. Harder to pick nose."

seeing as how there is no way I can beat that roll on a d20-1 you win.

The goblins search for you but eventually either give up or fail to find you. Unfortunately they also forget that you were hiding. You come out of the woods up to another goblin he sees you. oh yeah, ha, found youhe hits you with the club and them hands you the ring you hide good. Now you climb good

I will update the next dare after work in a few hours

Ponk throws a fit at being found. He casts jumps away from the goblin that found him, casts flare into ist face for being bold enough to swing a club at him, then stomps back to the bonfire, cursing the whole way, to drown his sorrows in a few fermented apples, chased by some greedy nibbles on his block of soap.

GM: My minimum is 20, and their maximum is 19, it seems. No matter what I'd have won. That's why I wanted to give everyone else a chance first. I have an ungodly Stealth.

Can't watch Grulo be hidy, cuz Grulo be hidy... bestter not to hide, but club.
Ghlurb nods to himself decisively, tossing the splintered club he holds onto the unconscious goblin at his feet.

Ghlrub brandishes his teeth at Grulo happily, slipping the ring over a finger and flexing his rippled muscles.

Ok, okie you dance with da squealy nord, you eat bull slugs, you hide real good. But chief want to know how one of you do against the rusty earbiter The infamous Rusty Earbiter is a hollow coil of rusty wires, barrel hoops, bents swords and thorny branches and vines that's kept behind the moot house when no not in use. It's gained its name from claiming a number of goblin ears in the past. It is an objects of fascination and fear. Challenge simple go through the rusty earbiter. If you escape fast and all us not get bored you get to borrow The Chief's Personal Very Useful Robe That Is Useful.

Ghlurb grabs a nearby goblin, pushing him head-first into the contraption, then tugs him out with a sickening *gwuuuup* and much screaming.

He looks at the goblin's severed ear with some amusement, then reaches into the earbiter, still holding his wretched ilk aloft, and retrieves a bloody morsel that looks roughly equivalent to the goblin's remaining ear.

Placing the wailing pig-mi on the ground, Ghlurb hands him the severed ear from the earbiter as a consolation, then retreats to the growing edge of spectators, grooming the long, tufted wolf's ear sewn roughly to his own head.

Staggering forth, Nenus yells, I cun stumbel trough dat!

Acrobatics check1d20 + 5 ⇒ (6) + 5 = 11

Crash...bang... apparently, not...

"ME try! I no eat Slugs, or hide, but I go through danger zone!"
1d20 + 3 ⇒ (6) + 3 = 9

"Ride into the danger zone! Head into the twilight!"

What sort of check is it do survive this thing? I never saw that posted. Acrobatics, Escape Artist, Reflex, Dex check?

They are calling for an Escape Artist check. However I would be willing to take the others at a higher DC. Also you can give me multiple and I will describe what happens. It requires three successful checks and you are allowed 3 fails.

Nenus stumbles and tumbles landing right before the contraption. There is quite the growing crowd to watch this spectacle.

"Well I get through this!"
5 Escape Artist Checks.. Just in case I have failures (I already failed the first, same modifier anyway) . Ignore any excess rolls if I fail or succeed.

ok Zinc you struggle through the first bit, having to back up as you feel some old farmer wire cutting into your ear. Damage1d4 - 2 ⇒ (3) - 2 = 1That was a wake up call. You explode through the first one section twisting and contorting which leads you to a path right through the second part. You can see the end which you eagerly try and go straight forward to cutting yourself severely as you just try and push forward at the roar of the crowd Zinc! Zinc! Zinc! Damage1d4 - 2 ⇒ (2) - 2 = 0
Damage1d4 - 2 ⇒ (4) - 2 = 2
The opening that the wire had taken on your body left a gaping hold which you explode through. Defeating the Rusty Earbiter.

Slorb says Good, you heroes like chief say. Me no doubt him. You have fun drive away Scribblefaces bad luck. Tomorrow you make quest. Prove heroes. He slaps you all on the back. Except for ghlurb which he is scarred of. Well him and Grulo. And Zinc and Bregnac. Well he at least thinks about it.

Ghlurb grunts, and sets his shield down by the fire, leaning against it.
Make quest good. This "fun" boring. Hit stuff fun. Fire fun.

The next morning comes, and a lingering sickness from yesterday's festivities has taken hold of the Licktoad tribe, maybe even yourselves as well, except for Nenus, he functions best with that cloud in his head. Into your tent walks Slorb in a high-pitched yell Chief see you now! Wake up...HeroesHe says sardonically all the while banging a pan to make sure you awaken with the sun.

Ghlurb takes a pot from his fellow "hero"'s head and brains Slorb with extreme prejudice. He then calmly returns the pot to its intended use as helmet, snickering. Gathering supplies for several days, Ghlurb waits at the edge of camp for his allies.
Grabbing three days rations.

Severely irritated with Slorb's choice in alarm clocks, Nenus rolls over seemingly less drunk than usual, a feat not known to many. Searching through a slew of emptied bottles around him, Nenus finally locates one with enough liquid to call it breakfast. Looking over at the now crumpled pile of Slorb, Nenus turns to Ghlurb and asks, How dare Slorb make noise? He no no what time eet is?

Grumbling, Ponk clambers out of a heaped nest of dirty blankets and oversized clothing. He thinks of setting Slorb on fire, but since the goblin is already laid out there's no point...what's the fun if there's no screaming? He gathers his gear and joins the others.

Bregbac's eyes part slightly and emits an irritated snarl at being awakened. She sheathes a dagger that she has held in hand throughout the night and with several grunts she comments as she sits up, "You be brave to wake a holy one... " and thinks to herself, 'Or stupid...' She clamors away and grabs up a chewy morsel saved from the the evening's celebration and gnaws on.

The goblin woman dressed in her armor and takes up the rest of her things before starting off in a slow trudge to she the Cheif.

Still rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Ponk nearly runs into Bregnac outside the Chief's tent.

"Hoi, Bregnac. Good job with Squealy Nord. You great rider, for sure. Chief should let you feast on noisy piggy."

Grulo was already awake when Slorb arrived, giving the kiss-up a glower as he noisily woke the others. Grulo couldn't help but giggle a little when Ghlurb laid him out.

Bregnac flashes a toothy smile at Ponk. "Danks! Zarongel would be most pleased! And Me sure Squealy Nord would taste yummy in my tummy!"

"Lets hurry so we can start on quest. Start fires on our enemies!" The womanly goblin says with zeal.

You clamor into the chief's moot house again You done good, last night, chief proud. Go get fireworks bring back to me. Here rest of Scribbleface's stash to halp you He hands you two Desnan candles, four paper candles and a skyrocket.

The journey to the fireworks stash is relatively short, a journey not quite a mile long through the swamp along the creek's southern bank. It only takes an hour to make. The marsh is relatively difficult to navigate, with numerous stretches of deep water that must be skirted and thick tangles of stinging nettles. How do you spend you time on this journey?

Ghlurb spends much of the trip in the lead, hacking through the underbrush and throwing branches down over the bog, keeping both eyes and an ear out for danger.
survival 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
perception 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (16) + 4 = 20

Nenus looks at the Chief up on his mighty chair and laughs, We be back sun wif da boomy things!

A fresh bottle at hand, and plenty in his "pack", Nenus sets off after Ghlurb, noticing he's spending no more time with the Chief.

Ponk follows in the wake of the others, cooing over the skyrocket and using all of his inconsiderable willpower to keep from lighting it off just to see it explode.

The goblin priestess departs from the Chief's house. She says a brief prayer asking for the blessings of Zarongel. "Give us chances to start many fires in your name and doggies to mete out your will."

She then joins the others following after the leading Ghlurb. Once out of sight of the Licktoad village she takes up her crossbow and readies to mete out some goblin pain.

((Perception 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (9) + 3 = 12))

Grulo acts as a stealthy ghost in the green, scouting out fir enemies, food, and a favorable route to their destination.

Perception 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (18) + 4 = 22 (+2 if vs humans)
Survival 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23 (+1 track, +2 vs humans)
Stealth 1d20 + 19 ⇒ (5) + 19 = 24