Recent Favorite Character Moments?


Gamer Life General Discussion


My most recent are

A crazy nighttime carriage chase through the streets of Westcrown while also being hunted by assassin devils

My paladin accidentally "riding" a dead red dragon into the River Path in Lastwall and struggling to keep from drowning in heavy armor... Turns out dead dragons float rather well

So many it's hard to choose


Well one that happened in our last WotR session:

Spoiler:
A very clutch Tactician by the cavalier gave the team Lastwall Phalanx, which allowed us to murder Baphomet in a string of AoO-provoking crits which in turn crit to provoke more AoOs and so on and so forth. Which is good because we probably would have wiped if that didn't happen.


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Dwarf barbarian tried to jump off a cliff onto a dragon that was pinning our wizard under his claws. He raged mid-air and ended up missing the attack and acrobatics utterly. Lost 99% of his HP and only survived because of going enraged mid-air.

Dragon proceeded to wipe most of the group when the neutral drow ranger rolls an instant death (20,20,20) on the dragon, which the DM said "no" to.

Fighter and rogue who are left manage to revive downed cleric and burn the dragon down.

Good memories!


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Mine is kind of long and very much not recent but it's memorable enough for me, that it trumps everything else I could post. We had a player known as "Evil Dave" because he always played Lawful Evil characters. Now, you might say "I wouldn't allow that, I don't allow evil characters in my games." and I say that if you knew Dave, he would have been your exception just like he was for us. We all knew and accepted no GM would let us play evil, but Dave? Yeah, Evil Dave gets to play Lawful Evil because he's so epic at it that even Paladins are his best friend (I heard he once went an entire campaign subtly manipulating to always make sure any time the paladin used Detect Evil there was a greater evil to scapegoat, and it was only at the end of the campaign when the players and the GM agreed to have Evil Dave betray the party did the paladin find out the truth... right before he died from the dagger (coup de grace) in his back from his best friend)

But what about Dave as GM? It was said that he tended to do TPKs, but they were always completely the player's fault. Intrigued, we younger gamers who had never played under him finally convinced him to run a game, so he agreed to a one shot where most of the party would get killed, and it would be totally our fault. Touche.

This was late 2nd edition (skills and powers) D&D and the story was to escort the princess (player named Leah) to her wedding in the neighboring country. Other players were me (a red wizard of Thay), a half-ogre fighter (player was Tom, he was also the princess' manservant), the cleric (played by Brett) and a few other characters that weren't memorable enough.

So entering a forest we see a sign by the path that says something like "Toll to enter forest. 1 gold. Leave by side of the road." So, we are like screw that, nobody's here. The princess has her manservant pay the toll for her and himself, and the cleric paid it, but I and all of the rest of us did not. We're miserly and leaving a gold by the side of the road for some silly bandits that think they own a forest? Please.

The rest of the night was pure ROLEPLAY no combat as we traveled through the forest, but every once in a while... something horrible happened to one character and they disappeared. Like for me a rope came down from the trees, around my neck and hung me. LOL. As I was the first to go, I didn't actually get any of the roleplay myself, but I was still having a blast watching everyone else as they chatted, wait where did the wizard go... chatted... hmm the rogue disappeared.. chatted...

At the end only the princess, the cleric, and the manservant were left as the princess made it safely to her wedding. Those 3 who paid the toll.

There was one other hilarious thing that happened along the way involving the cleric using Command on the half-ogre and telling him to do something, but it was sexual so I'll just let you use your imagination.

Overall, that really is one of my most memorable games, so much that the fact that we all died and couldn't stop it, pure GM fiat was fine with all of us, because as he said, it was our own fault. We didn't pay the toll.

The Exchange

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I spent a campaign day speaking Ignan (Turkish) in game because my character had picked up Oracle as a class and was under a lot of stress. I wouldn't listen to anybody except the DM and the two players that could speak Ignan. DM said it was the most memorable day or role playing ever.

BTW, I can't speak a word of Turkish, so the pronunciations were undoubtedly horrible.


Our Rouge chose to try and bluff his way into the captain of the guard's office instead of climbing through a window or something. The guard at the door asked him his name. Keep in mind we had only been in town for a day or so, he had never met this guard before and he wasn't wanted for anything. He could've just told him his name if he wanted to. He said his name was Shlamafab. Failed the bluff check. Wound up just climbing through the window. Decided he'd rather be a ranger.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

Well, Grog is my Half Orc weapon master who met a Mongral Person in a Module in a barn. He has, since then, introduced her and his growing number of kids in his character introduction. "Me Grog, this my scythe, and this lifemate, Oomph, my son, Oops, and daughter, Uh Oh."

Well, just before he bacame a seeker, I made Uh Oh. See, she was given away to a dragon (copper) in a failed diplomancy check.

My first introduction of Uh Oh for a few games, playing her or Grog, is her walking into the pub, seeing her father for the first time since she was a babe, walking right up to him and giving him a big, loud slap across the face.

"You gave me away to a DRAGON?!?!"

Being a Daredevil/Savage Skald bard with Perform Comedy and going into Dragon Disiple, it is only going to get better from there.


One of my players is a wizard and I created a side quest for him to setup traps for a local caravan. He did a pretty successful job and walked away with a couple pieces of gold for his efforts.

Later on I created another side quest where the merchants forgot the password to the warehouse and needed his help to unlock it. Three times in a row he failed his spell craft rolls and zapped himself down to 3hp.

"I think I'll just take a nap"
The wizard told us he willingly fell unconscious on the floor outside the warehouse.

The next day he woke up, drank a healing potion and opened the warehouse on his first roll.


Friend playing an unarmed fighter this past weekend saying, "Be still so I can punch a f*^#hole in your head."


i once played a evil cleric, hag like.
she used fly in a bridge fight, avoiding the BBEG.
all went GREAT until the BBEG used dispel on me...
i missed the bridge and fell to the lava below.

BTW - this was meeting #1....

Silver Crusade

I've got a few that come to mind, although in my case its from my place behind the screen watching my players.

1.
The party has just acquired a ring of dodgy propositions, its registering as 'non magical' but still is seemingly compelling people to wear it. So the party immediately has warning flags. One of the party members is a LN Dhampir cleric of a god of revenge, with the undead master archetype.

Rogue: ...man, I dunno who should carry this thing until we figure out whats going on with it.
Summoner: Probably someone with a high will save...
Cleric: :D
Summoner: ..who isn't likely to consider murdering us in our sleep to raise us as compliant undead.
Cleric: :(

2.
Heroes in another group are introducing themselves, and listing accomplishments.

The mage, who has fought undead legions, cast down fiends, saved an entire city, etc.

Mage: I have tenure at the College of Silverymoon.

3.
Due to being in a dodgy place, the bard is being pursued by a faceless aberration the party has pegged as being 'slenderman.' The party mage, who OOCly gets the heebie-jeebies from the guy is concerned, leading to the following exchange.

Mage (OOCly) Ugh...how can you use that thing, you know how it bugs me.

Bard, ICly: ...damn groupies.
Bard, OOCly: I'm 14th level, if that thing messes with me I'm going to reduce it to a disturbingly featureless leather throw pillow.


Two very similar events that happened a couple of sessions apart. The first time we were down ourninja as the player was absent. The tthree of us who were there were riding to a village to deliver medicine to a village for the church of Erastil. We met a dying man on the road who begged us to save a differentvvillage from a monster of some sort.

Now part of the intent here was to give the parties redemer paladin of Erastil a dilemma. Not an instant fall just a something that would force him to make a choice. So the paladin makes the third choice. He declares that Erastil is devoted to hunting down monsters we go that way. Then he straps the medicine to his mount with a note and sends it on to the sick village. (the paladin makes sure that the mount maintains a higher AC than the paladin)

When we get to the village being attacked we find it ruined and dead for quite a while. The town hall is now the lair of a cloud dragon. My magus (originally TN but greedy for power had slid into NE a while ago) translates for the paladin into draconic when there is no answer to common. The dragon demands a tribute to allow us to live. In draconic which none of the rest of the party present speak, the magus offers the paladin. And keeps generally insulting the paladin throughout the translation The dragon wanted our gear, then attacked and we killed it.

A couple of sessions later there were again only three of us at the table, this time our Ranger was absent. The ninja had become a Lich session before (an artifact did it) and had been LE for quite a while (due to the same artifact). The three of us who were there were attacked by Zuishin Kami, who were really only attacking the ninja Lich and ignoring the rest of us. My magus was the only one who had any idea what they were and did not share with the party at large (I did have my cacaodeamon familiar that the paladin has only seen as a snake tell the ninja however) As he fights the ninja claims in several different languages that the paladin does not speak that he does not want to fight them and is forced to do evil by his master- the paladin. One of them even got away.

Me and the ninja are discussing how to turn the paladin.


Either no one has anything better or I killed the thread.


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Spook205 wrote:

Heroes in another group are introducing themselves, and listing accomplishments.

The mage, who has fought undead legions, cast down fiends, saved an entire city, etc.

Mage: I have tenure at the College of Silverymoon.

Hey now, don't knock getting tenure. It's job insurance!


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Paladin bullrushed the unconcious White Necromancer to safety.

Hunter leaping off a corner wall-perch, onto Tree That Weeps, and near-critting on a CMB to place an immovable rod into its mouth.

Oracle breaking Puck by showing him how she can cast in antimagic fields.

Oh! Warpriest five-star frog splashing the BBEG that was in a pit.

Silver Crusade

Well, it's a lesser one, considering my character is only 1st level, but makes it to 2nd level this Sunday and has only been in two adventures.

We were in a society module where we were supposed to find this errant adventurer who was the son of a noblewoman. Well, our first fun was a bit of roleplay where we dealt with some bandits. To start with, I was playing a rogue that tried to sneak up on one of them so he could take him quick. Failed my stealth check, so I improvised and told the DM that I was going to bluff that I had stepped off the trail to attend to personal business. Natural 20, leading everyone to start laughing at how I had consistently rolled low, then high. Especially fun was our creative "interrogation" of the bandits, which basically ended with me tying a noose around his neck, offering the rope to the barbarian and reminding him "remember, throw the rope over the limb, not the body". Needless to say, Intimidate check passed. At the end of the mission, I had snuck into a bandit camp to rescue the lordling, only to be discovered by a werewolf. And our entire party had absolutely zip in the way of silver weapons. Our fighter ran up, and was brought to 0 in one turn. Then, as I tried to get the kid out, the werewolf stepped into the tent with me. I knew I was screwed, but I tried to hit her, and missed. If I moved, I was dead, if I stayed where I was, I was dead. I tried to tumble out of the way, but I failed, so I had my character offer a salute to the werewolf as I fell (NG Chelaxian of the Silver Crusade). Then, our barbarian(pregen) just charged the werewolf and one-shotted it, even with the DR. Made up for how he had gotten his a$$ handed to him by a blacksmith earlier that day. After that, we got healed up a bit, and let the lordling out. He came out arrogant, we needed to convince him to give up adventuring, so I finally had enough and challenged him to an adventurer's duel. I was going to flip a coin, and as soon as it landed we would begin to fight. My plan was to flip the coin, then slug him in the face, with full sneak attack before the coin landed. First rule of being an adventurer: adventurers cheat.


I'm curently having my party defend a small village from an orc tribe. After they had concluded that the orcs had someone patrol the hills at night in order to spy/put traps everywhere, the party's rogue decided he was going to be on the case. Needless to say he decided the best disguise would be to dress up as a bush in order to play the best game of cat and mouse.

The thing was that they both didn't notice each other, until the Orc ranger tried to go hide in the bush.
Bush: CR 4.


My insane oracle intimidating a gargoyle to leave us be.

My halfling witch kicking down a (with furniture) barricaded door the warpriest was about to dmg.


I'm playing a CN Barbarian built like Guts from Berserk; a real mean dude, with a large adamantine greatsword. We're in Nirmathis trying to get close to the cult of Razmir; and the brain of our group comes up with the plan to split us into three groups:
-the rest joins the cult
-the fighter and I join the town guard
- the rogue is "the wildcard"
and we all leave notes with the innkeep. I join the guard no problem, but need to make a name for myself quick to get selected by the cult. The rest of the party join with few surprises; meanwhile the "wildcard" is furiously scribbling notes and passing it to the GM. So the night they all go to the admission ceremony thing, I skip my duty and "guard" the front of the establishment. I see my friends drugged and carried into a secret tunnel. At this point my PC sees two things: the "wildcard" casing the cult's establishment, and a barfight break out across the street. I run over to the barfight and start beating up all the participants; some lady screams, I punch her too. The guards come over and try to calm me down, I notice our "wildcard" just slipped over the wall, gotta buy more time; I start beating up the guards who "were preventing me from stopping street violence". It cuts to the "wildcard", after it gets back to me the scene is over, except for me seeing some masked cultists avidly watching my show I put on; guards that should've been watching the wall. I get back to the inn, leave a message for the "wildcard" about the secret tunnel, wake up and head into the guard barracks, the chief wanted to see me. Inside was all the guards I beat up, the chief and they were all glowering at me; also was a masked cultist. The chief looks at the paper in his hands, the tightens his fist around it, it has the Razmiran seal on it; he says "I was going to have you hanged today, but your 'showing' last night must have impressed the right people; you're being reassigned to the church of Razmir.". So now I'm in the church, but I'm not being watched like the new acolytes are; I have a run of the place, except for then 2nd floor. Meanwhile the "wildcard" has made his way in as well; he took out one of the higher ups and is disguised as him. Our mastermind player is part of the "helpless" acolytes and never had to lift a finger yet; I recently smuggled him his spell component pouch though so things are looking good.

Dark Archive

1. Blowing up a Longship with a crazy halfling ranger wearing an alchemists fire suicide vest.
2. Jumping 100ft. off a tower to kill the boss after everyone else in the party is dead.

Contributor

Players end up in possession of a soul gem containing the essence of an ancient and mad imentesh protean of the long-dead Chorus of Malignant Symmetry. The players also knew a friendly (if completely unreliable) NPC that has some manner of connection with the (possibly protean built) city of Galisemni in the Maelstrom, and seemingly on good terms with the protean lord Ssila'meshnik.

So they approach the NPC while she's in the middle of boozing herself into oblivion, just because it seemed like a good game plan for that day. They give her the gem. She listens to it, whispers back to it a bit. She shrugs, pauses a moment, and then proceeds to swallow it.

Ramifications to come later. :D


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Our party has an unofficial policy of NEVER using a door (especially a doorknob, those are for wimps) as it was intended unless there was no other option (adamantine weapons + high Str plus generally not giving a damn about if people get mad if we destroy their things in most places we've been = fun times and a lot of "WHY THE F~&$ DID THAT DOOR JUST EXPLODE?" moments).

Recently we came across this big building of some kind and, of course, didn't feel like going through the door. But the Wizard had been going through his spells and he's like "Oh that's right, I have Polymorph Any Object now!".

So we discuss it for a bit and eventually decide that, yes, transforming my Barbarian into a Huge Earth Elemental was a cool idea. Cue my Barbarian being even more large and in charge than ever before.

*Roll Strength check, augmented by rage and Strength Surge*

"Yep, that does it."

The stone wall of the building naturally explodes inward, as I burst through it screaming "OH YEAAAH!".

There's also this from two sessions back, that I posted on the forum a couple of weeks ago:

Rise of the Runelords spoilers:

So we've finally reached Xin Shalast after forever, and are getting ready for the final showdown of sorts. We just need to make our way through this city, and we're basically done with the AP.

We arrive, and not long afterward we see this ugly ass vulture looking thing flying around, and it looks like it's headed for us.

My Barbarian, Crokus, and our Monk, Zix have no idea what it is, but it doesn't seem overtly hostile, even though it's carrying a bow. And to be honest, even in character we're like "Whatever it is, there's only one of them. It will get its s#%! wrecked if it starts something". So we're content to see how this plays out.

Our three casters, Jerol (Sage Sorcerer), Savariss (Wizard), and Dove (Dark Tapestry Oracle) all identify it as a Kuthrima, akin to some Lamia things we've fought before.

Jerol and Savariss are like "This thing is not very strong, and it hasn't attacked yet. Probably not a threat." (OOC: It's CR 8. Alone. And we're level 16.).

Dove is like "IT'S F~*@ING EVIL". Shortly followed by "I cast Destruction."

The thing looks might confused, but makes its Fort save and so only takes 10d6 damage (as opposed to the flat 170 it would have taken otherwise). Still takes about a 3rd of the sucker's HP, but he's alive.

We all laugh a little bit and are like "Seriously Dove, what?"

The GM goes "Um. Okay. Let me look up the stats for this thing then..." and we all crack up more.

He lands on the ground, a bit wobbly, and Initiative is rolled. I win Initiative, but both IC and OOC I'm f@@~ing confused as to what's going on, so I just delay.

Dove's up next. Thing goes to open its mouth like it's going to say something.

"I hit it with another Destruction."

It does not get lucky with another 19 on the save, and is utterly destroyed. Overkilled, as you might expect, 170 damage vs its max of 104 HP.

For those of you who don't know, Destruction has a secondary effect: Anybody killed by it is "consumed by holy or unholy fire", and utterly destroyed. No pile of ash, ala Disintegrate. Just GONE. But only the creature, not its equipment.

And we crack up. "Dude, Dove, what? Was it really necessary to go all murder hobo on the little guy?"

In short order, two more show up.

Dove immediately Hides in Plain Sight, and rolls a Stealth check of like 74 or something. On top of Invisibility (Ring of Invis). Long story short: Ain't nobody seeing her.

"Where's Joe?"

Crokus, of course, tries to cover for his buddy.

"Yeah he um, he just kinda landed here, dropped his bow, and took off?". My whopping -3 Bluff fools absolutely nobody.

Zix rolls his eyes and tells the truth. "Our friend just flipped out and killed your friend for no reason."

"What friend?"

"That frie-...oh."

(Dove OOC: "Yeah I see this going well. 'Our invisible madwoman friend totally just killed your buddy and ran off.'")

And sure enough, they're like "Yeaaaaaaah."

At this point, it's obvious they're itching for a fight...but just as obvious they don't want to get into it with us, the guys who just killed their friend and destroyed all trace of him in less than 6 seconds.

We do a little back and forth and remark on how for Kuthrima, they're awfully restrained (they're usually Chaotic Evil, and quite vicious).

They go on to explain that they are f%@*ing CATTLE RANCHERS.

That's right: Dove wigged out and obliterated Farmer Joe the Cattle Ranching Kuthrima outta nowhere.

Cue collective facepalm.

Everybody else in the party is like "S@~!, we've got to fix this. Dove just ganked a peasant. A butt ugly peasant, but still."

Problem being, of course, Destruction is mighty thorough, and really expensive to undo.

So we're like "Wait here a second." and Teleport to Absalom. Thankfully, we've got like 60k gold saved up in the party fund from when we were going to buy a flying robot that shoots laser beams, so we dipped into our robot fund and bought a scroll of True Resurrection, and brought Farmer Joe back into existence.

So of course we're just kinda standing around awkwardly while Dove (who made herself visible) apologizes to the group of (now 6) Kuthrima for obliterating Farmer Joe out of nowhere.

Many laughs were had.


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I and a group of dwarves are exploring somewhere, and we end up meeting a venomous armored construct. We happen to have very cramped quarters, as we're at the edge of a "bottomless" pit at the time. Everyone starts trying to figure out how to position themselves to attack with their weapons.

I proceed to grab the thing, pick it up, and toss it into the pit. It bit me, and we had this exchange:

"The thing bit you! Is the poison a problem?"

"Bah, my cousin's ale is stronger than this stuff."


My arcane duelist bard mounted the transmutation wizard and rode him into battle. (the wizard was a large dire wolf and had cast fly on himself)

Liberty's Edge

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Wrong John Silver wrote:

I and a group of dwarves are exploring somewhere, and we end up meeting a venomous armored construct. We happen to have very cramped quarters, as we're at the edge of a "bottomless" pit at the time. Everyone starts trying to figure out how to position themselves to attack with their weapons.

I proceed to grab the thing, pick it up, and toss it into the pit. It bit me, and we had this exchange:

"The thing bit you! Is the poison a problem?"

"Bah, my cousin's ale is stronger than this stuff."

*raises flagon, approving nod*


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My Andorid character was recently banned from pretty much any social interaction with the people of Sandpoint on account of his less-then-empathetic communication skills.

Ven Vinder: Where is she!?! Have any of you seen my daughter!?!"

Android: She is currently engaged in coital activity with an expedition partner of mine.

Ven Vinder: WWHHHAAT!?!?!

Android: (Rolls Sense Motive) You appear to be upset. I would like to inquire further about the reasoning behind this reaction.

I've basically taken the "Emotionless" race trait to the ludicrous extreme. Also...

Android: As requested, we have vacated your residence of goblinoid creatures. However, your son was discovered dead before our arrival.

Resident: (Breaks down into violent sobbing)

Android: Your dog was also found deceased.

(Rest of party tackles Android)


I was playing a soulknife that through smart choices of feats and blade skills had become the party tank (go figure). We'd finally caught up to the bad guy and he was dangling the hapless princess over an open pit. My character bull rushed forward, leaped the pit, grabbed her out of his hands, and landed on the other side. On the next turn I turned him into burger. The rest of the party was slack jawed because they were completely unsure what to do. When I play I'm the risk taker! lol

Shadow Lodge

I just finished running We Be Goblins! for my son and his high school friends. They're all off to college in a few weeks. They loved the scenario; but the highlight of the night came thanks to my son reading his character sheet carefully.

When the goblin PCs were about to be devoured by Lotslegs Eats Goblin Babies Many the party cleric, Poog, jumps up, leaps onto the giant spider, and starts talking to it (animal domain). He spent several turn negotiating with it and convinced it that he could provide it with many snacks (lots of pickled halfling toes were exchanged during negotiations).

The rest of the game Poog and his new best friend, Lotslegs Eats Poog's Enemies, or Karl for short, followed the party around scaring the crap out of the alchemist. The best part though, was he did not try to dominate the game by ruling from on spider. Everybody got to have their best moments and shine; but the boys are kind of sad that they can't keep Karl for We Be Goblins Too.

The Exchange

Splode wrote:

My Andorid character was recently banned from pretty much any social interaction with the people of Sandpoint on account of his less-then-empathetic communication skills.

Ven Vinder: Where is she!?! Have any of you seen my daughter!?!"

Android: She is currently engaged in coital activity with an expedition partner of mine.

Ven Vinder: WWHHHAAT!?!?!

Android: (Rolls Sense Motive) You appear to be upset. I would like to inquire further about the reasoning behind this reaction.

I've basically taken the "Emotionless" race trait to the ludicrous extreme. Also...

Android: As requested, we have vacated your residence of goblinoid creatures. However, your son was discovered dead before our arrival.

Resident: (Breaks down into violent sobbing)

Android: Your dog was also found deceased.

(Rest of party tackles Android)

I sooooo want your android to join our ROTRL game. We just started Skinsaw and you would be a brilliant addition to our little madcap party.

Liberty's Edge

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So one of my friends started running a Second Edition game a couple weeks ago, and we get some characters created (after having to explain to a couple of friends how THAC0 and pre-2000 Armor Class work) and we're off on the obligatory first-level "raid a tomb of the DAAAAAAMNED" adventure.

We have a couple combats, we realize that I only have one healing spell for the entire group per day, and we run into some kind of tomb defender/undead champion. He gives us some threats about what he's going to do to us, my cleric whips out her holy symbol, gives a Sailor Moon-ish speech about turning the undead, and I roll my turning check.

Natural 20.

Mike the DM: Awesome! Okay, he is turned as a Special Undead.
Me: (checks my notes. I notice that I'm nowhere near powerful enough to affect Special Undead, such as named undead with class levels)
Cleric: (holding her holy symbol of The Heart between her and the skeletal champion) .....
Skeletal Champion: .....
Elf Fighter: .....
Her Equally Elven Mage Husband: .....
Human Greatsword Fighter: .....
Cleric: ...... =D??
Skeletal Champion: .....=D
Mike the DM: Initiative time! =D

The Exchange

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Okay, so we're starting Skinsaw Murders. The party was 5th level at the time and two of us have lived in Sandpoint for at least the last 10 years. Our party ranger (Caleb) is a member of the Deverin family (the mayor’s nephew), lives with his parents when he bothers to stay in town, and has a younger sister and brother (Cassidy age 18, and Connor age 16).

My character, ifrit sorcerer/oracle with a charisma of 20 and a wisdom of 7 (GM wouldn't let me drop it all the way down to 5), is young, clueless, thinks the whole town looks down on him like something scraped off a tiefling's shoe, and couldn’t sense a motive if you beat him to death with it. Now, when we sorted everybody's backstories together last fall with the GM it was basically determined that Qakisst (my character) went to school with the ranger's sister and little brother. So they're friends; all well and good. This last week, just before we find out that there's a murder to solve, Qakisst on a lark asks 18 year old Cassidy Deverin to go hang out at the Dragon that night.

Now Qakisst thinks he's just hanging out with a friend, Cassidy (per the evil GM) is all excited that the cutest boy in town asked her out, Caleb (our party ranger) is threatening my life (in character), and Qakisst hasn't got a clue why or what he's done. The ranger thinks I'm trying to bag his sister, and who wouldn't think that, but that’s not the plan. The plan is just to yank the ranger’s chain till he flips out. What happened next was a 30 minute argument between characters, with the GM laughing hysterically in the corner, that went something like this.

Caleb - "Kisst, you can't take my sister to the Dragon." Pointing menacingly at Qakisst.

Qakisst - "Why not? We hang out at the Dragon all the time." Pointing to himself and Caleb.

Caleb - "Cause she's my sister!" Hands waving in the air.

Qakisst - "Yeah, I know that. So what?" Shrugs.

Caleb - "What do you mean, 'So what?' She's my sister fer Desna's sake!" Hands still waving in the air.

Qakisst - "I used to hang out with your sister all the time in school. You did not scream at me in school about it. What, am I suddenly not good enough to be friends with your sister?" Grabs large bull horns on forehead and shakes his own head.

Caleb - "No, no it has nothing to do with that. You just can't date my sister." Pointing at Qakisst's horns.

Qakisst - "Do not be stupid, Caleb. Your sister would not ever want to date a freak like me. Who would?"

Caleb - "Laure seems interested enough in you!" Referring to one of the Pixie Girls that has taken a liking to Qakisst.

Qakisst - "Laure and I are just friends."

Caleb - "Oh no you are not!"

Qakisst - "She just likes adventurers, Caleb. She'd date you if you weren't spending all your time in the woods with Loki." Pointing to the ranger's wolf companion. "I am nothing more than the flavor of the week to Laure; and I do not see what that has to do with Cassidy and I hanging out."

Caleb - "But she's my little sister!" Hands waving in the air again.

Qakisst - "Blessed Dawnflower, Caleb. She is 18. No wonder nobody ever asks Cassidy out. If you treat her friends like this all the guys in town must be terrified of this house." Stomps off mad heading for the armory.

This is followed by a 30 minute argument in character between the GM as Cassidy, and older brother Caleb that lasts until Cassidy tells her brother to go piss up a rope (but less politely). Caleb, terrified that Qakisst might actually take his little sister out stakes out the Dragon to make sure that nothing actually happens. Qakisst, not wanting to seem like a cheap ass, and having had to offer to pay for dinner (yes it turned into a date without Qakisst figuring that out – Wis 7), takes Cassidy to the White Deer Inn (I get free meals at the Dragon because we saved Ameiko’s life).

Caleb, satisfied that Qakisst did not take Cassidy to the Dragon goes home for the night. Qakisst and Cassidy show up late at the Dragon and have a great time hanging out, Caleb none the wiser.

GM still rolling on the floor laughing at two 45+ year old men playing out a scene from High School Musical.


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Playing Age of Worms. We managed to take Filge alive at the end of the first chapter and are attempting to deliver his eyes to Kullen as per the orc's request. There's just the sticky situation of the Paladin in the party wanting them to still be attached to Filge when they're delivered. He managed to weasel his way out of an immediate execution, so we knocked him out, stuffed him in the bottom of the wheelbarrow, and half the party carted out to the farmhouse to re-bury the corpses he'd had stolen, while the other half try to arrange a meeting time with Kullen.

A few wrong words from the druid to a barmaid and the entire Feral Dog suddenly thinks my monk either wants to go on a date with Kullen or just plain sleep with him. (Which, being fey, she's not exactly opposed to the idea. She is however opposed to being made a public spectacle of.)

She also doesn't know/forgets that Kullen can't read, so the note she leaves him (since there's far too many people suddenly interested in her comings and goings to approach him with anything resembling privacy) gets completely ignored.

After the monk, and later the druid, get sent by the paladin to trek back and forth across town a few more times to find him with no luck, we give up on tracking down Kullen for the day and head back to the Feral Dog, handing unconscious Filge over to the orc rogue and bouncer in our party to keep an eye on for the night. Unbeknownst to any of us, someone pegs him with a dart with slow-acting poison on it. Come morning, while the rest of us are eating breakfast, the rogue gives him a check-over (if only to see if he needs to be dumped over a chamber pot for a bit) and finds Filge stiffer than he'd like in all the wrong ways.

After a few panicked moments, including the classic line "How is he dead? He doesn't have a scratch on him! ... that we didn't put there!", we let the paladin spoon out and bottle his eyes for Kullen, then after she leaves run through no less than five ideas for getting rid of the body. We eventually decide to dump it back at the Whispering Cairn and let the acid beetles or something dispose of it for us. The orc wraps him up in the entirety of his bedding, dumps him in a wheelbarrow, tells any passersby "scuse me, laundry", and eventually carts him out to the Cairn while the monk fetches the paladin from the local temple to the death goddess, where she's scrubbed the place from top to bottom in her frustration over the insanity going on.

Two sessions' worth of comedy of errors.

Silver Crusade

I'm racking them up under all my identities this year. This one is from Legacy of the Stonelords at Gen Con 2014. Since I don't want to spoil the fun for anybody that gets to play it later in the convention season...

Stonelords:

We made it all the way through the sky citadel Jormurdun and back to the foundry where the dwarven forge master requires you to make his friend laugh. His friend is of course the fire elemental that powers the dwarven foundry. Nobody in our party is a bard or has any kind of perform skills, and nobody can figure out what you could possibly do to make an elemental laugh.

So, out of ideas my tiefling sorcerer walks up to the dwarven smith, kneels down and grabs him by the ears and kisses him full on the mouth, then says, "Hi honey, I'm home!"

The entire table busts up, but the DM still requires a performance check. I roll a 1. However, I had made it through the entire night without using my re-roll. The re-roll is a nat 20 (yeah, I know. I didn't believe it either and I rolled it). That gave me a 24 on a perform comedy check, and apparently I get love letters from ancient Jormurdun now.

One of the best Gen Con game moments I have ever had.

The DM also marked my Chronicle sheet, "Impressive Performance." So I must have done something right besides surviving the 80 foot fall with only 20 HP at 6th level.

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