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Hi,
I've played about 20-30 games of Pathfinder Society and as an adult, I am seeing some players i've encountered as less than fun to play with. My purpose is to get advice on either adjusting my attitude or calling out other's poor attitude in a way that is logical and not demeaning so they will ultimately treat me with courtesy like I will in return.
Issue 1: People (not even in a game) talking about my character as splitting the party after the game when my character never split the party...My character had first initiative in a combat and signalled to the entire party the direction I was headed and asked them to follow (my character ultimately died because no one chose to follow)...this became a debate after the game because others were gossiping one of the person's opinions about my character's path he chose. The issue wasn't that I died or any feelings about no one following my character the path I went...the issue was that someone lied after the game and was spinning gossip about me personally...I kindof think its hugely disrespectful to have a venture captain state his opinion of a game he "heard about" and this come up.
Issue 2: During a game, I was skipped over 3 times where others did what they wanted (out of combat initiative) and waited 15 minutes. I spoke up to the GM and asked if my character can explore an area while others were doing their part (effectively splitting the party). Because my character I assumed over a 90-120 min period during the game would be doing something helpful. The GM got pissed and said he is not going to do that because all the party had to stay in the same area...I checked after and we did not in that scenario...that is not the issue though...How do you deal with a GM when they choose to railroad the adventure and it is extremely boring and are ignoring your character ----and when you try to do something you get hostility? Would it be okay to just get up and leave that table and get no credit because there seems to be some person hostility issue the GM has?
Ideally, I want to get along with all my party and help everyone enjoy the game...but as there's always the human element...I want to ensure to have a good response to times when people are being dicks (whether it's other players or a click of players OR its the GM themself). Sometimes tables I am at have kids too, so it really strikes me at surprising that some of these behaviors manifest from adults.
Please send advice on how I can respond to these things as I haven't yet confronted the individuals or reported them if I should for their behavior. I dislike hostility so as a newer player in Pathfinder Society i've just chalked up the disappointing experiences as something to hopefully learn from...I just want to make sure I stand my ground but not be wrong in how I do it according to proper society play.
Thanks in advance to anyone who can give me good advice.
Issue 1: People (not even in a game) talking about my character as splitting the party after the game when my character never split the party...My character had first initiative in a combat and signalled to the entire party the direction I was headed and asked them to follow (my character ultimately died because no one chose to follow)...this became a debate after the game because others were gossiping one of the person's opinions about my character's path he chose. The issue wasn't that I died or any feelings about no one following my character the path I went...the issue was that someone lied after the game and was spinning gossip about me personally...I kindof think its hugely disrespectful to have a venture captain state his opinion of a game he "heard about" and this come up.
I'm actually against you on this one. You picked a direction and then walked that way and expected everyone to agree with you. Really, the whole party should discuss which was they're going to walk. So yes, you did split the party. You walked away from them.
Issue 2: During a game, I was skipped over 3 times where others did what they wanted (out of combat initiative) and waited 15 minutes. I spoke up to the GM and asked if my character can explore an area while others were doing their part (effectively splitting the party). Because my character I assumed over a 90-120 min period during the game would be doing something helpful. The GM got pissed and said he is not going to do that because all the party had to stay in the same area...I checked after and we did not in that scenario...that is not the issue though...How do you deal with a GM when they choose to railroad the adventure and it is extremely boring and are ignoring your character ----and when you try to do something you get hostility? Would it be okay to just get up and leave that table and get no credit because there seems to be some person hostility issue the GM has?...
I'm going to say it. GMing is hard. Until you've tried it, you really can't complain about it. Managing 4-6 people at once who all have different ideas is tricky. As a player, you should be trying to help the GM with their job. If they don't want the party to split then instead of forcing the GM to handle something they don't feel capable of, you should try to keep it manageable for them. Find something you can do without splitting the party. Even if it's just sitting around making sarcastic commentary at someone else's failed search check. Well, if you do that make sure to stop if someone takes offence.
Then there's the other reason everyone hates it when someone gets it into their head to try and explore alone. Very few things are more hated than the guy who gets into a fight they can't handle solo while the rest of the party are still healing.
Finally, the same advice that everyone who has people problems gets. If you're not having fun, then walk away. My personal spin on that is that you should try to be polite about doing so, but I can't make you do that if you don't want to.
RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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...as an adult, I am seeing some players i've encountered as less than fun to play with.
This sentence perplexes me. Are you suggesting that if you weren't an adult, you wouldn't have noticed unfun people around you? Well, anyway, that's just a passing curiosity. On to your questions! :)
Issue 1: People (not even in a game) talking about my character as splitting the party after the game when my character never split the party...My character had first initiative in a combat and signalled to the entire party the direction I was headed and asked them to follow (my character ultimately died because no one chose to follow)
Wait, so you tried to tell everyone else what they should do, then they made their own decisions instead and it resulted in a split party, but you don't bear any responsibility for that split?
I mean, obviously I wasn't there, but from your description it sounds like you expected everyone else to take orders from you by default, and that's pretty pretentious. That's how your story reads. Perhaps there are some other details you could add to clear things up?
I kindof think its hugely disrespectful to have a venture captain state his opinion of a game he "heard about" and this come up.
If it's disrespectful to talk about a game you weren't in, then what the hell is this thread for?
Issue 2: During a game, I was skipped over 3 times where others did what they wanted (out of combat initiative) and waited 15 minutes.
What do you mean by "skipped over"? Do you mean that the GM didn't call you by name and say "And what are you doing right now, so-and-so?" Not every GM goes person-by-person when outside of initiative. That's just a GMing style/preference type of thing.
I spoke up to the GM and asked if my character can explore an area while others were doing their part (effectively splitting the party). Because my character I assumed over a 90-120 min period during the game would be doing something helpful. The GM got pissed and said he is not going to do that because all the party had to stay in the same area...
It's entirely possible that the GM simply wasn't comfortable trying to effectively track two parties. GMs have the right to work within their own personal boundaries like that (though if he "got pissed", he probably could have handled it better; gamers don't always do a great job of identifying or discussing their own needs/preferences). In any case, there are lots of possibilities here, so it's hard to comment very specifically.
How do you deal with a GM when they choose to railroad the adventure and it is extremely boring and are ignoring your character ----and when you try to do something you get hostility?
Honestly, I eventually just quit PFS (for an assortment of reasons, some of which are similar to this and some of which aren't). But if you want to keep playing in it, then options might include trying to play with certain GMs you like, or doing more GMing yourself, or perhaps adjusting your expectations in light of the fact that PFS has a limited time slot to get people through an adventure that they don't get another chance to play and might be upset to miss out on if it goes too far off the rails (part of the same reason GMs aren't supposed to modify adventures; players have a right to experience a given adventure fully during their one chance to play it).
Hope that helps!