RPG project nearing completion, feedback much desired

[Space Potato]

Greetings. =)

I am in the final stages of converting a homebrew campaign into an RPG ebook (and hopefully later a print version, if there is demand):

Between Chains and Starlight – by Bennie Martinali
Magic and technology combine in a dark scifi setting. Against a backdrop of evil empires dominating known space, characters fight cyber-slavery, spaceborne undead, for righteousness, or merely to survive. The book will include:

• A revamped ship and vehicle combat system allows for a wider range of player character actions and roles, and intuitive ship configuration as well as optional rules for constructing and customizing ships. Pre-made ships, both faction-specific and generic are included, along with NPC crew capabilities.
  
• Optional rules grant fantasy characters convenient ability to use technology, including through a number of new technology-related spells. The use of technology-related skills is heavily expanded, and rules are included for the construction of virtually anything.
  
• Three short missions and one longer mission, complete with maps.
  
• Interior art includes 35 color illustrations, 17 color maps, and 1 grayscale map. (12 of the maps are combat, the others are overland.)

For a preview, go here:
spacepotatoproductions.wordpress.com

Any feedback and questions will be much appreciated.

-Bennie Martinali
Space Potato Productions

[Stormhierta]

What do you need feedback on? Might I suggest offering a preview PDF as a playtest document?

[Space Potato]

Stormhierta wrote:

What do you need feedback on? Might I suggest offering a preview PDF as a playtest document?

Well, the writing style, background, whether people like the map style used, if they think the premise is interesting or not, things like that, though more important are probably the things I didn't think of.

Hmm, a playtest document... The book doesn't change the rules for personal battles, but it does include a variant ship and vehicles ruleset. It's been tested ad nauseum at this point; I'm reasonably confident they work. I can see how people would prefer to see and try the rules before they buy into the game though.

I'll see if I can put together such a document, and if it would not give people the wrong idea - while ships and vehicles are an important part, the rules for ships and vehicles comprise only about 14% of the book. I don't want to give the impression that that is all the book is about.

This suggestion in and of itself is useful, because it informs me to a degree what people want to see in a preview (even if I may not be able to do so right now, it will be helpful in future projects). Thanks. =)

[ShadowcatX]

Anything that can help readers make an informed choice when buying your product is helpful. That includes sending the product out for review, having previews / free supplements, and better descriptions of pretty much everything. Furthermore:

This:

Quote:

Optional rules grant fantasy characters convenient ability to use technology, including through a number of new technology-related spells. The use of technology-related skills is heavily expanded, and rules are included for the construction of virtually anything.

seems to contradict contradict this:

Quote:

The book doesn't change the rules for personal battles

If you're using technology that's a huge change in personal battles. And new spells can easily be poorly balanced. Seemingly contradictory statements like this serve to confuse people.

[Space Potato]

ShadowcatX wrote:

Anything that can help readers make an informed choice when buying your product is helpful. That includes sending the product out for review, having previews / free supplements, and better descriptions of pretty much everything. Furthermore:

This:

Quote:

Optional rules grant fantasy characters convenient ability to use technology, including through a number of new technology-related spells. The use of technology-related skills is heavily expanded, and rules are included for the construction of virtually anything.

seems to contradict contradict this:

Quote:

The book doesn't change the rules for personal battles

If you're using technology that's a huge change in personal battles. And new spells can easily be poorly balanced. Seemingly contradictory statements like this serve to confuse people.

I will of course send the product out for review once it is finished. By 'having previews', how much content, perhaps as a percentage of the book, would you say is a reasonable amount? And in what format do you prefer it?

As for my statements, I can see how they could be confusing, sorry about that. I should perhaps have worded it differently. By not changing the rules, I meant the core gameplay mechanics have not changed, save for the additions specific to this book. Game balance *does* change in several ways, and it does actually force groups to change their tactics somewhat, at least when dealing with the creatures specific to the setting.

If I may ask, what specific questions do you want to see answered about a product? Player character level the missions are geared for, numbers of creatures and spells, mean challenge ratings?

Either way, thank you for the feedback. The more I know, the fewer mistakes I will make - or at least I will make more interesting ones.

[ShadowcatX]

Space Potato wrote:

I will of course send the product out for review once it is finished. By 'having previews', how much content, perhaps as a percentage of the book, would you say is a reasonable amount? And in what format do you prefer it?

You're talking to the wrong person here I'm afraid. I don't care much for previews myself, I focus in on the reviews. I only recommended previews because I saw in another thread how much previews can help people.

And you'd be amazed at how many new companies don't send their products out for review. (I discovered a company a couple days back that had almost a dozen pathfinder products, not a single review on any of them.)

Quote:

As for my statements, I can see how they could be confusing, sorry about that. I should perhaps have worded it differently. By not changing the rules, I meant the core gameplay mechanics have not changed, save for the additions specific to this book. Game balance *does* change in several ways, and it does actually force groups to change their tactics somewhat, at least when dealing with the creatures specific to the setting.

Be very careful changing game balance, this can ruin an otherwise good product.

Quote:

If I may ask, what specific questions do you want to see answered about a product? Player character level the missions are geared for, numbers of creatures and spells, mean challenge ratings?

For the love of all the gods, please make the character level of an adventure easily noticeable on any advertisement. That is one of my biggest turn offs, having to sit and wonder "Is that for level 2 or 20. . ."

I would personally never put a number of creatures or encounters for an adventure. Too easy for players to see it and be like "oh, now I know when the final boss is coming in." An expected amount of time for it to be ran would be good. As would any information about things that the players are allowed to have (ie. archetypes, feats, spells, etc.).

Also, anything that changes the fundamental nature of the game should be at least mentioned.

If I can make a couple of generic suggestions:

If you can, link everything in the product to d20pfsrd.com. I believe there's a program (application, whatever people are calling them these days) that does it relatively simply. That's always a good selling point. John Ryest could tell you more about how to do that. (Well, probably anybody could tell you more about that because that's the extent of what I know.) Not a must have but if it is free and easy, it is nice to have.

Your non-combat maps, if you're printing maps with numbers on them, make sure to have a player friendly copy either in the pdf or available as a free download. (You get a free web supplement, plug a hole in your product and keep Endzeitgeist from rating you down as that's one of his pet peeves.) And since they're player maps anyways, it won't matter if the players see them. :)

[Space Potato]

ShadowcatX wrote:

You're talking to the wrong person here I'm afraid. I don't care much for previews myself, I focus in on the reviews. I only recommended previews because I saw in another thread how much previews can help people.

Do you have a link handy, by any chance? That sounds like something I need to read.

Quote:

Be very careful changing game balance, this can ruin an otherwise good product.

The book started off as a homebrew setting that I ran for fun, it was not originally planned to be monetized. - I just went with what was fun. (The firearms rules started off as a variant we had been using for years, of existing Open Game Content.) The game ran for a year and a half, during which the rules were occasionally slightly rebalanced. As it stands now, it is essential to the setting, removing them is not an option. I'm sure some of the rules can be abused, but that's between the player and GM...

[ShadowcatX]

Space Potato wrote:

ShadowcatX wrote:

You're talking to the wrong person here I'm afraid. I don't care much for previews myself, I focus in on the reviews. I only recommended previews because I saw in another thread how much previews can help people.

Do you have a link handy, by any chance? That sounds like something I need to read.

This thread is the one to which I'm referring to. (It starts off about the art, but keep reading, there's some very good stuff in there.)

There are some other threads with some potentially useful information, LMPjr for example has posted some interesting information about 3pp in his blogs as well. (I don't have immediate link to those unfortunately).

Edit: I'm not entirely sure the etiquette of linking to offsite blogs, I doubt LMPjr would object, but to be on the safe side here is a link to a thread where he links his blog himself. (Apparently a thread that we managed to over look. I'd look through several of his blog posts before and after this one as well though.)

Quote:

Quote:

Be very careful changing game balance, this can ruin an otherwise good product.

The book started off as a homebrew setting that I ran for fun, it was not originally planned to be monetized. - I just went with what was fun. (The firearms rules started off as a variant we had been using for years, of existing Open Game Content.) The game ran for a year and a half, during which the rules were occasionally slightly rebalanced. As it stands now, it is essential to the setting, removing them is not an option. I'm sure some of the rules can be abused, but that's between the player and GM...

First, if you're doing a sci-fi setting people are going to expect firearms, that's fine. If your first level characters have access to firearms that hit touch AC and do 50d6 of damage, that's less so. (An exaggeration, of course, but it shows my point.)

That said "if players abuse the rules I set forth, that is a problem between them and their DMs" does not seem like a good attitude to have. I'd recommend going over everything once more with an eye aimed at optimizing as much as possible and see if your system breaks wide open because if a DM has to house rule your product from here to kingdom come to make it viable, why are they buying your product. Yours isn't the first Pathfinder in space product to come along, do everything you can to make it the best.

That said, my advice on changing game balance wasn't "Don't do it." It was "be very careful doing it."

[Space Potato]

Thanks, that thread is actually quite useful, some very practical things I'll have to try when it's done. Also I'm pretty shocked at the low rates artists get when providing art for those products. I'm pretty sure I would not be able to work for those rates, if only because of the time it takes.

I've included more information in the wordpress page where I put the preview pages:

Is this sufficient information?

Stormhierta suggested I put up a playtest pdf as preview. I'm currently putting together one, but I'm a bit concerned that people will interpret it as being more dominant in the book than it actually is - the ship and vehicle rules comprise about 15% of the book.