It's over *points* THATAWAY!!!
With that roll, I'm surprised i got that much
*Looks over Thataway*
Metagaming Check: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (17) + 5 = 22
Okay folks, I think that's our plot hook. Get your stuff. We're going...
[SUNGLASSES]
Thataway!
*Eyes large hook dropping out of the sky.*
Righty-ho, and off we go. OMH, you got more beer?
Everyone who goes THATWAWAY sees a small village of dirt farmers. A little girl is crying.
*Head over to the girl*
"What's wrong little princess"
She takes one look at your ears and runs away screaming. A peasant heads out, a pitchfork pointed at you.
"Hello good sir/maam, I apologize for startling you and the child. We have just finished a battle in genericville with some evil cultists and are seeking the escapees.
Have you seen any cultists? and do you know where their lair may be?
OMH, would you mind helping us out on this one? I'm catfolk, and between the two of us, RC and I may make them nervous.
I got this.
I go over to the peasants, and strike an awesome pose.
"Mmmmmmmg."
Looks like Lord Shotgun is out of town. We got a mutant elf, a catman, and a mute girl. When did I become the normal one?!?
"Don't worry, miss/mister. We're the good guys. Is there anything we can help out with?"
DP: He looks at you, then to LOB.
LOB: "Half the village was killed by a bunch of Orc Cultists riding Warg Cultists! And they stole our pigs and bathtub!"
Warg Cultists... Damn! I hate it when that happens! This reminds me of the battle I had against warg cultists in Dunceville... phew... That was a terrible story.
"Mmmmmg. Mmmmmmg mg mg mmmmMg MmmmmmMMg."
"Your bathtub? Now, that's just not allowed! Which way did they go?"
. o O (Hmm, bathtubs hold water, which puts out fires. What do I care about that. On the other hand, pigs + fire = bacon.)
"Which way did they go?!? Let's get 'em!"
Stealing your bathtub!, There more evil than even I expected
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Lobriathus Berwell wrote: On the other hand, pigs + fire = bacon.)
NOOOOOO!
He points "They went that way!" (East. THATAWAY is North) If you succeed, i'll give you our ancient +1 Longsword!
"We will do our best good sir, I apologize again for startling your family"
*Heads east*
"Coming!" *Takes off eastward*
I bow to the commoners and leave along with my companions.
Everyone who goes East finds a camp.
*Duck down behind a bush, Do I see any humans or cultists?
perception: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (10) + 7 = 17
You hear cultist chatter and pig squealing
I will relay the info to my fellow cultist haters.
How far away are we?
Are we in bomb range? I can kill the enemies and make breakfast at the same time! 8^)
In crossbow, but not bomb range.
*To party* "So what's the plan" *Laughs softly*
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Who's gonna volunteer to charge them? NOT IT!
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I nominate the mute monk, she's a badass
"Mmmmmg."
I flex my rock-hard fists and strike an awesome pose for the benefit of my companions.
I start running. It is time to apply senseless amounts of violence.
*Follows and flexes ears into not so awesome pose, yells out a half hearted battle cry*
"Die you pig stealing cultist bast@%#s"
They turn around and ready their Cult Swords.
Hmmm, might not have thought that all the way through. Not in bomb range here, now there are allies in melee. And they've proven useful so far, so no frying them.
Cinders.
Time to Hulk up, I guess. drinks mutagen (+4 Str, -2 Int, +2 natural armor).
"I say, chaps, let's dispatch these ruffians!", and I move up 20 ft.
I cast Magic Missiles at the first cultist I see.
*Attempt to move behind cultist and get backstabby on it*
stealth: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (3) + 7 = 10
"Save me a cult sword, I have no weapons"
Everyone make attack and damage rolls, they do not see RC.
Lemme know when I get there. (Short legs, y'know. At least I'm not encumbered while beefed up.)
Right Ear: 1d20 + 2 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 2 + 4 = 16 To hit
Left Ear: 1d20 + 2 + 4 ⇒ (20) + 2 + 4 = 26 To hit
PainRighty: 1d4 + 2 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 2 + (2) + 2 = 10
Painlefty: 1d4 + 2 + 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 2 + (4) + 2 = 10
Two cultists fall, and one attacks you!
1d20 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10 for 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7
"Save the pigs!"
Can I see the cultist attacking RC?
"HA, Foolish cultists can you not see the evil of your ways be free!
convert: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 1 = 15
Never mind. More MM's at whichever cultist I previously hit.
I make a Sevenfold Kick of Thunder Judgement at the first four I reach.
Attack 1: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (4) + 8 = 12Damage 1: 1d8 + 8 ⇒ (1) + 8 = 9
Attack 2: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (19) + 8 = 27Damage 2: 1d8 + 8 ⇒ (1) + 8 = 9
Attack 3: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (15) + 8 = 23Damage 3: 1d8 + 8 ⇒ (2) + 8 = 10
Attack 4: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (17) + 8 = 25Damage 4: 1d8 + 8 ⇒ (2) + 8 = 10
(sorry about my absence from this thread)
Five fall, and the survivor surrenders.
Still running. Feels like it's taking weeks for me to catch up to the rest of the party and join the fight. 8^)
When I get there, I'll swing at the first opponent I can get to.
Gnome Hooked Hammer: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5whap: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (6) + 3 = 9
Edit: ninja'd by the GM! I'll threaten the survivor as menacingly as I can with the hook end instead of whapping him.
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