STOMP
RRRRRRRRRMMMM
THIS NONSENSE IS TAKING TOO LONG
THERE ARE RATS AND ENEMIES TO DEVOUR
Ahhhhh. AC 25 is pitifully low. 10 is what an unarmoured human has. 25 is 15 worse. A good AC starts at 0. 20 is a crit and does double damage. However, with plate and armour training, you should have an AC of around -2. A 20 still hits, but you are not critically hit. 2 damage.
His other one is obviously his other eleven foot pole.
Gassy: You stomp Nessy, Babby or the Scarabian?
Oh, I start my day with a delicious cocktail of pills... I have no idea what they do, but I suspect they are to blame for my breath. However it isn't all bad. I don't need breakfast.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I'm here. Didn't somebody need me?
*sneezes*
*dies*
Hey Thiefy! Don't die!
His other one is obviously his other eleven foot pole.
Gassy: You stomp Nessy, Babby or the Scarabian?
JUST STOMPING GROUND FOR ATTENTION. NOT ATTACK.
ALSO DID TURN WORK
You think it did. But as you stomp the floor, the Scarabian disappears.
WORKS FOR ME
BACK TO HUNTING
*awakens*
Huh? Wha? Did you guys have me resurrected? Gee, that was swell of you. Now, where are there pockets I can pick... OH GODS, ARE WE IN COMBAT!?
*hides*
You may have to compete with Babby here for wallets. I am sure someone can tell you the story so far?
Shhh. I'm hiding.
No. You need to roll high to hit something. THAC0 and all that. What you do is make a critical fumble!!! You swing your eleven-foot pole, hit the wall, the shock makes you drop the pole, which bounces to hit Alissa in the foot. She takes your damage, and can't run or jump!
*shrugs* Sorry.
You clumbsy clod. In the future use rosin on you hand to get a better grip your weapons.
|
*awakens*
Huh? Wha? Did you guys have me resurrected? Gee, that was swell of you. Now, where are there pockets I can pick... OH GODS, ARE WE IN COMBAT!?
*hides*
I WILL END YOUR MISERABLE EXISTENCE YOU ANTIQUATED OUTDATED EXCUSE FOR A CONTRIBUTING MEMBER OF SOCIETY
YOU TOO, THIEF
P.S. HAHAHAHA SEE BECAUSE I WAS TALKING ABOUT OUR GM AHAHAHA GET IT?!
What is this about GM? Newfangled stuff. I am a DM, Dungeon Master. Pffft. And society can eat my bony, hairy butt if it wants me to contribute. Been there, done that. Not doing it again. See? Age comes with some benefits.
Okay, gang, extra 15 XP for first to tell Thiefy the story so far. Other than that, what you doing?
Pssst, Mr. DM. What's a 'rogue'? Is that what turns your face red?
And what's with this 'd20' stuff? You mean 2d10? And why roll those? Where are the d6's?
I believe it's makeup.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Let me 'splain.
*pause*
No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
We were in a tavern. The tavern owner hired us to kill rats. Here we are.
Since the target can't be aware of you if you are to succeed on a BACKSTAB, you really can't do it to someone's face.
Yay, Lissa (mind if I call you Lissa?) gets 15 XP.
If I can call you Rog.
Rog... it has a certain jensiquoo... I like it.
'Sneak attack'? Is that like backstab? Hey, what are your special characteristics? I taste bad to monsters. Which is good 'cause I can see a gazebo from here. It's white.
The Gazebo is your cleric.
HEAL RANGER
Wha-? We can be nonhuman? I wanna be a phraint!
Woo-hoo! (makes note not to backstab Nesod yet)
Thiefy, you get 1 XP for getting 1 GP.
Sure, you can be a locust man.
Gassy: Roll a Wisdom check to manage to heal Lissa's foot.
This coin is probably cursed, innit? Or magic? Maybe it's magic. But how do I activate it? I know!
*Proceeds to fold, spindle, fondle, and mutilate the coin. Ends up by swallowing it.*
Do I feel any different? Do I glow? I jump into the air. Can I fly? Can other people see me now? Can I understand all languages?
I AM HEALER!
BE HEALED!
Darkness falls on the corridor.
I rub my legs together to produce a chirping noise and use that to echolocate.
Gassy: Roll a Wisdom check to manage to heal Lissa's foot.
VS WIS 16
HEAL
Congratulations. Lissa can now run and jump again, as Gassy heals her foot.
Okay, the room to your left is full of otyugh treasures, the corridor is pitch dark, and continues onward.
What do you do?
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I CAST INFLICT LIGHT WOUNDS...
AT THE DARKNESS!!!
Can I join?
I'm not big on brains, but I have lots and lots of charisma. I can cast the same spell repeatedly too, if needed.
Gah! More ways to divide XP and loot. Can I backstab him?
Okay, sure. You have been checking the cellar, walked down the stairs. You find the others, and an apparently tame otyugh. It still stinks to high heaven, though. Which spell do you know?
Charm Monster and Emotion (Bonus Spell). I make the tame otyugh my friend then make him angry. I sick him on the Nesod and First Edition Thief.
"Fresh meat," I say to the Otyugh while pointing at Nesod and F.E.T. "Backstab me and take my cut of the EXP and loot will you."