All of them. Also a couple of real ones, just to see who's paying attention.
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So, how many fake diseases are going to have the kids come up with they absolutely should get their cat tested for?** spoiler omitted **
See? At least trying to keep the griping behind spoilers.
"I was told my kittens might be low on blinker fluid? It's apparently related to a condition where cats just stare at you out of the darkness."
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Amusement of the morning: We got the kittens on the 28th (almost two weeks ago). At 3:49 am Impus Minor came into our room. "I can't take the kittens any more!"
"Just lock them out of your room."
"I thought they had to be with someone..."
So, when we got Fluffy she was alone and we didn't want her terrified and alone for the first night so we put her in Impus Minor's room for one night. He concluded that kittens always have to be with someone, and for the last two weeks he's been dealing with the two kittens (who can keep each other company) waking up at all hours of the night to play in his room.
I am astonished at the young man's patience...
Earlier today:
Guest: *approaches holding cup of coffee* "This coffee is ice cold. You need to make fresh coffee."
Me: "I made that coffee less than an hour ago, and I can literally see steam coming off of it right now."
Guest: *looks at steam, takes sip* "I guess it's hotter than I thought." *walks away*
Maybe you have excellently insulating cups? Or maybe the cup was freezing cold before filling and needed time to warm up?
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Gaming Karma: As I've mentioned, Tomb of Annihilation makes no secret of, "If you don't have a wizard in your party you're going to die." It goes so far as to drop powerful wizard-only items (spellbooks, magic items, etc.) in almost every single dungeon. And yet as I've also mentioned, Problem Player came in with the fundamental attitude of:
(1) "I am going to play the party's arcane caster. Period."
(2) "I will never play a wizard."
So, after his fourth PC died (this time in a fight that killed half the party), he finally relented and brought in a wizard. On Wednesday we had the first session with him. We handed him the spellbooks we'd been toting around for no reason. And in the second spellbook? "Here's the command word that shuts down all the constructs that killed half your party last week."
His refusal to play a wizard got his own character killed. I am pleased with this revelation.
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Seniors' last day. One of my TAs gave me a note saying how much she'll miss me and looks up to me.
So I'm sitting here trying not to bawl while the kiddos take their Gatsby tests...
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In better news, the stars finally aligned so we could actually play our frickin pnp game. I'm really enjoying my airheaded tarot reader oracle.
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There is nothing quite so delightful as flinging kittens at your spouse in the morning to "help them wake up".
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Student A: I think letter 1 is number A.
Student B: Oh, don't start that again!
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Please tell me that at least one of them wrote "Actually, he was only the 'Pretty Good' Gatsby."Seniors' last day. One of my TAs gave me a note saying how much she'll miss me and looks up to me.
So I'm sitting here trying not to bawl while the kiddos take their Gatsby tests...
I think it should be multiple choice:
"How was Gatsby?"
(a) Great
(b) Pretty good
(c) Nothing to write home about
(d) Poor
(e) A legend in his own mind
Recent interaction, slightly dramatized:
Guest: "Why does my room only have one bed, I need 2!"
Me: "Well, because you reserved a king room, but I have rooms with 2 queens available. Give me a second and I'll switch you."
Guest: "I did NOT reserve a room with one bed, I reserved a double!"
Me: "You didn't, you reserved a single. Luckily, though, we have plenty of rooms, so here's the keys to a double room."
Guest: *scoffs incredulously* "I most certainly did not reserve a single. You screwed up my reservation."
Me: "We did not make a mistake. You reserved a single. But it's taken care of. Here are the keys to your new room."
Guest: "How dare you accuse me of lying! I will prove that I reserved a double!" *pulls out phone, dramatically scrolls through email to find confirmation* "SEE! It says clearly that I reserved a ... ... ... single." *stares at phone for about 15 seconds, then puts it away* "Well, you should have known that I needed a double." *grabs key, storms away*Some people, I swear.
in recognition of this poor guest, I, Freehold DM, will suggest 1 (one) less room party at my next hotel stay.
Please tell me that at least one of them wrote "Actually, he was only the 'Pretty Good' Gatsby."Seniors' last day. One of my TAs gave me a note saying how much she'll miss me and looks up to me.
So I'm sitting here trying not to bawl while the kiddos take their Gatsby tests...
I think it should be multiple choice:
"How was Gatsby?"
(a) Great
(b) Pretty good
(c) Nothing to write home about
(d) Poor
(e) A legend in his own mind
They should be grateful. I was too overwhelmed with the job hunt this year to drop the toilet paper factoid I usually ruin the romance with.
Earlier today:
Guest: *approaches holding cup of coffee* "This coffee is ice cold. You need to make fresh coffee."
Me: "I made that coffee less than an hour ago, and I can literally see steam coming off of it right now."
Guest: *looks at steam, takes sip* "I guess it's hotter than I thought." *walks away*
Okay this guy is just f@+&ing with you.
"Well, you should have known that I needed a double."
I don't know how I can more thoroughly explain my complete and total frothing rage at the idea that people should be expected to be telepathic to do their fhtagning jobs.
Student A: I think letter 1 is number A.
Student B: Oh, don't start that again!
Please tell me they at least tried to do the vulture voice.
There is nothing quite so delightful as flinging kittens at your spouse in the morning to "help them wake up".
Cat-apulting, in other words.
"Well, you should have known that I needed a double."I don't know how I can more thoroughly explain my complete and total frothing rage at the idea that people should be expected to be telepathic to do their fhtagning jobs.
Well, if you were telepathic, you could just send them your rage!
Well, if you were telepathic, you could just send them your rage!"Well, you should have known that I needed a double."I don't know how I can more thoroughly explain my complete and total frothing rage at the idea that people should be expected to be telepathic to do their fhtagning jobs.
Control those feelings, focus them, concentrate, and... Release!
<psychic blast blows any nearby Tiffany lamps to smithereens>
There is nothing quite so delightful as flinging kittens at your spouse in the morning to "help them wake up".Cat-apulting, in other words.
With A sense of déjà vu: you’re asking for a catastrophe.
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Fantasy Monster: Kiln-Baked Men
I initially wanted to name them Baked Men, but the jokes would probably never end...
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Stone-Baked Men isn't better either.
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I was going to post a bunch of stuff about the problems caused by youth teams this weekend, but, frankly, it's so much that I feel like y'all might not believe me. Suffice to say, it really sucked and I'm glad that I didn't have to deal with it.
I work with high schoolers and didn't take my team to State this year because the only kid who qualified has the impulse control of a hummingbird, and I did not have the energy to explain to him that you have to behave like a human even at the theatre kid convention. I would believe you.
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I was going to post a bunch of stuff about the problems caused by youth teams this weekend, but, frankly, it's so much that I feel like y'all might not believe me. Suffice to say, it really sucked and I'm glad that I didn't have to deal with it.
My mother, grandmother, mother's best friend, my ex-wife, my first ex-stepmom...all teachers.
Also there was a time I was in high school, and I know what we did.
I would believe you.
Also, we're starting to sound like a support group.
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I was going to post a bunch of stuff about the problems caused by youth teams this weekend, but, frankly, it's so much that I feel like y'all might not believe me. Suffice to say, it really sucked and I'm glad that I didn't have to deal with it.I work with high schoolers and didn't take my team to State this year because the only kid who qualified has the impulse control of a hummingbird, and I did not have the energy to explain to him that you have to behave like a human even at the theatre kid convention. I would believe you.
high five for you both. Great smart kid, great wise adult.
Watching Orthos and Scint's agonizing work with Sophie makes it even more enraging to encounter careless/stupid dog owners.
It's May in the Bay Area. You can predict that the highs are going to be from the mid 60s to low 70s and the lows are going to be in the low 50s and be pretty much spot-on 99+% of the time.
-BUT-
This morning it's pouring rain. Who the heck knows where it came from? And some poor dog was outside howling in the wet for at least an hour this morning because their owners presumably:
(1) Left them outside overnight with no way to get in,
(2) didn't provide adequate shelter, and
(3) didn't wake up to hear their dog howling for over an hour.
It's all supposition on my part, but considering there are many dogs in the neighborhood and they never howl unless there are sirens nearby, the combination freak rain storm and howling dog makes me think someone f****d up. And I don't appreciate it. Not because of the noise, but because I feel for the dog.
And we've all griped about UI designers who feel appearance should trump functionality before (hiding the scroll bars, anyone?), but my directives are coming straight from someone who must've failed English and wants to take it out on the world.
"I don't like title case. Capitalize everything."
"No. I don't like that. Make all your titles sentence case."
"No. That's wrong. You still have capital letters in there. I want them all gone!"
Even worse, it's our annual All Hands gathering (yes, I'm going to use proper capitalization anyway, nyah!), and we're required to attend a 90-minute talk on, "The case for sentence case."
In short, my division leader wants to rewrite the rules of English punctuation because he finds them unattractive.
Grr...
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I would also like to rewrite the rules of English punctuation.
Rule 1: I'm allowed to 3-D print a giant interrobang to beat people with.
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Also, we're starting to sound like a support group.
Starting?
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Capitalization has been my bane lately solely because I'm having a rough adjustment to APA for my communications degree. Using sentence case rather than title case for a title is just...
my gamer in Christ, the word title is in "title case" for a smurfing reason.
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Also all the capitalization quirks are giving me some Homestuck flashbacks, and I'm not sure I'm ready for the PTSD.
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Public Service Announcement: Kittens and cherries DO NOT mix.
Apparently cherries are the perfect size and texture to be tiny little kitten toy balls, and the stems give them a convenient way to pull them out of the bowl when they've lost/lost interest in their previous "toy".
Sooooooooo many cherries... all over the floor... throughout the house... at $9/pound!
I'm dreading school being out partly as the end of an era and partly because I'm going to lack distractions from getting wrapped up in my own head and the catastrophizing that always happens when I am left to my own devices. Especially because this is a huge life change coming up - there's a whole lot of worst case to scenario.
I'm dreading school being out partly as the end of an era and partly because I'm going to lack distractions from getting wrapped up in my own head and the catastrophizing that always happens when I am left to my own devices. Especially because this is a huge life change coming up - there's a whole lot of worst case to scenario.
The false vacuum could spontaneously collapse into a lower energy state, unmaking the universe as we know it...
Uh...
I am not helping, am I?
After waiting a month and a half, the company manufacturing Yggdrasil had to admit they couldn't get it to me -- apparently reasonably-priced shipping places refuse shipment to Albany. I checked shipping myself and it was $465. For that price I could ping ToZ and get him to send a couple of his army buddies on a road trip to California in a U-Haul.
C'mon, Phoenix! California may be an alien landscape, but the trucking routes are pretty clean! $465 for one pallet of goods? In summer? What do you expect to run into?
Anyway, shipping tirades aside, we ordered a smaller, less-magnificent cat tree I honestly think the cats'll like better. They have it labeled as arriving on Wednesday. And it hasn't even shipped yet. Where the heck is it shipping from? Definitely not Phoenix!
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We are a terrible support group.
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After waiting a month and a half, the company manufacturing Yggdrasil had to admit they couldn't get it to me -- apparently reasonably-priced shipping places refuse shipment to Albany. I checked shipping myself and it was $465. For that price I could ping ToZ and get him to send a couple of his army buddies on a road trip to California in a U-Haul.
C'mon, Phoenix! California may be an alien landscape, but the trucking routes are pretty clean! $465 for one pallet of goods? In summer? What do you expect to run into?
Deathclaws.
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I'm dreading school being out partly as the end of an era and partly because I'm going to lack distractions from getting wrapped up in my own head and the catastrophizing that always happens when I am left to my own devices. Especially because this is a huge life change coming up - there's a whole lot of worst case to scenario.The false vacuum could spontaneously collapse into a lower energy state, unmaking the universe as we know it...
Uh...
I am not helping, am I?
That would literally solve every problem I have.
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We are a terrible support group.
Just going by what I've felt on the receiving end, we're a Spocking *amazing* support group.