You can’t hug a smurf with nuclear arms.
Dr. Albert W. Wily wrote: The prices of thermal nuclear devices!
*Sighs.*
I remember the good old days when you could buy 10 for a penny!
Beyond that, none of your business!
Why? What's up with you, doc?
Frankly DOOM feels their is nothing wrong with clean energy dooms day devices.
Waterhammer wrote: You can’t hug a smurf with nuclear arms. I bet DOOM can.
*plays DOOM age boom box*
Who can take a sunrise (Who can take a sunrise)
Sprinkle it with DOOM (sprinkle it with DOOM)
leave it with destruction and a apocalypse or two?
Doom, with all due respect, it doesn't take a genius to work out that if you were to deal in nuclear devices then your precious little kingdom of Latveria would be made to suffer like the rest of the world. Then again, you are evil beyond measure, so maybe the plight of your people no longer matters to you.
Obviously he’s got a force doom, er, I mean dome over Latveria.
Hmm is the lowly Vampire addressing DOOM about Latveria? Latveria whom was a third world country before DOOM took over. Latveria that now has a 0% illiteracy rate, a 0% poverty rate, a miniscule crime rate. Latverians with an unparalleled quality of life. Is that the people and country to which you refer?
It is indeed, Viktor, and bless you for helping them out.
*Smiles menacingly, eyes glowing red and fangs elongating.*
And I'm not as lowly as you might think, I dare say that I'm the equal to your universe's version of Count Dracula. Besides, as an unrepentant evil and downright heartless monster myself, I know that you would gladly throw your own people to a pack of wild dogs to gain divine power (I'm not criticising you, of course, for I would gladly do the same thing). The difference between us? You are still delusional into thinking you could be a hero, and win the affections of someone who has already been claimed, while I revel in my infamy like GoatToucher revels in his repulsive debauchery! To me, the world is naught but full of sheep for slaughter!
Oh, those are your bloody sheep? Clear them out! They're half starved, and are casting hungry looks at Vid7 and myself, thinking we're vegetation.
He was speaking metaphorically, there's no actual sheep here to...
*Spots an immense flock of sheep with glowing red eyes and long fangs.*
Good grief, vampire sheep, everyone run!
*As we all leave the forum to escape from the vampire sheep, I quickly turn to Pulg.*
But seriously, by "sheep for slaughter", the Count just meant that everyone's lives are meaningless to him and that makes us expendable in his eyes. He is truly a vile individual.
But then when you have divine power, and it’s not enough. What then?
I’m asking for a friend…
Good question, and that's exactly the point I was trying to make!
Most villains, myself included, find that enough is never enough.
Even when you have all the money and power you could possibly want, there's still going to be a part of you that doesn't feel "complete" so, you keep doing evil deed after evil deed until you finally get the satisfaction of neither needing or wanting anything else ever again. I hope your friend will find this advice most useful.
Maybe you should try macrame instead. Evil macrame, if you like.
Tried it, didn't help. Just kept making rope to strangle people.
So little imagination. Make the macrame to support your potted strangle-vine. Then you get macrame and horticulture at the same time.
I heard their were sheep?
There were then. But not now.
Aww poor Cougar his hopes got dashed.
And all of his blood has been sucked out by those vampire sheep too.
It just makes them ill. All they really want to do is to level drain grass.
Yes, that's why you have to be careful about what you turn into a vampire.
It's really such a shame that most creatures just don't have the stomach for blood.
So then do you relate more to leeches and mosquitos?
Yes, and to lampreys as well as all the other bloodsucking things.
Although, it would be more accurate to say that we vampires relate more to the monster girl equivalent of those things as they are (in essence) part of the same family. But, I won't go into the details as, monster biology is a difficult concept for us monsters to grasp.
Need a good cryptobiologist.
I happen to be one, the best as a matter of fact, how may I help you?
And Reiner meant to say: monster biology is a difficult concept for even us monsters to grasp.
He meant a skilled and knowledgeable crypto biologist, Not a well intentioned do gooder such as yourself.
Very funny, I am not a "well intentioned do gooder", I'm a notorious villain where I'm from. Trust me when I say that I am the most highly skilled and universally knowledgeable cryptobiologist, and you'll never find anyone better in either field, I assure you.
I have invested heavily in cryptobiologists.
And yet, neither I nor anyone else in the field has received a single penny for research!
Hah! You can’t fool me. I remember you giving the grinch that nice new brain transplant. Plus, it would explain why you haven’t received any grant monies.
When exactly did so many super villains start regularing this thread?
I'm BACK!
Anyone miss me?
I did, and now get to cleaning the cave!
It's full of dust and pesky little blue creeps!
And exactly when did Dedrick give the Grinch a brain transplant? I don't recall...
*Sports a cheeky while saying this.*
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Right away boss.
Sweep sweep sweep
Uses vacuum to suck up the little blue creeps. Dumps them into the piranha fish tank.
Here you go fellas. Each one is bite size.
Good work, but... Those particular piranhas....
Are pacus (specifically the large, herbivorous type).
So, the little blue creeps won't be able to eat them all.
Then what are those bottles of Underwater Sauce for?
The smurfs seem to be eating the pacus, so I guess they need the sauce. I hope it’s not weaksauce.
I believe it is, unfortunately. Oh well, these things happen.
*Shrugs.*
Tell you what, I'll put in some red bellied piranhas to help the little blue creeps out!
*Fills the tank with thousands of red bellied piranhas.*
Smurfs and piranhas combine and multiply, running around and eating everything they see.
*clack Clack* *waives claws menacingly*
Luckily, I have developed a terrific new spell to magic away all of the smurfs' dentures.
SIM BOM BALLA BOO!
*from atop the now blue and small Pulg* *clack*
NOOOOOO! My Piranhas.
You nasty blue creeping things.
Picks up now fishless fish tank and throws it over the side of the mountain.
SPLAT!
Vergeef me, ik ben bedekt met natte smörven
People out in the street outside are staggering around shouting something about a full brass carmine gnome, which sounds deeply worrying. Beatrice, Verity, fetch me my hanger and blunderbuss.
Here you are. We shall arm ourselves with hairpins and lock ourselves in the drinks cabinet.
But that's where I keep my best brandy!
By coincidence, all of Pulg’s wives are named Brandy.
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