I'd like to take off my Slaad costume and show you who I really am.
"Hello, my name is Al Gore."
<Scuttles back into the ceiling>
Circus peanuts are quite possibly the worst food ever.
Ooh, I have bacon bits!
Wanders back into thread wearing the remnants of 5 different costumes, carrying a pillow case full of empty candy wrappers, and holding an empty growler.
Any good eggings lately?
Maybe? I don't really remember too much about my Halloween festivities.
I got some trick-or-treaters. They were all like "trick or treat" and I was all like "TRICK! BEYOTCHES!" and I implanted larvae in their abdomen.
I like to think that some time, when they are unwrapping their candy, my spawn will unwrap them from the inside.
Good times! Speaking of which, this last weekend was a blast in Philly. We had baseball tailgating on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, and football tailgating on Sunday. I was worried, at first, that there wasn't enough of me to go around. It all went pretty well, though.
I put on my Al Gore costume. I scared children and made them cry. Then I sprayed nacho cheese all over them. Heh! Heh! Heh!
BEST TRICK EVER.
I put on my Al Gore costume. I scared children and made them cry. Then I sprayed nacho cheese all over them. Heh! Heh! Heh!
BEST TRICK EVER.
{pokes tenatively with a stick} So the Gore thing was just a costume? {sighs in relief}
Did you tell them that candy causes global warming and drop carbon credits in their treat bags instead?
pokes tenatively with a stick} So the Gore thing was just a costume? {sighs in relief}
Did you tell them that candy causes global warming and drop carbon credits in their treat bags instead?
Candy causes global warming? Whoa! Second Best Trick Ever.
GO TEAM CHAOS!
I have gills!
stumbles into thread wearing the tattered remnants of a mime outfit, carrying a deceased turkey under one arm, a case of beer under the other, and dragging a live chihuahua which is biting his ankle
Somebody's ready for Thanksgiving. Eh, Potato?
Somebody's ready for Thanksgiving. Eh, Potato?
I'm not sure the Chihuahua would make a good meal....
*eggs chihuahua*
Hey! You leave Mr. Schnookums alone!
Hey! You leave Mr. Schnookums alone!
It's too QUIET!
flings chopped tuna
It's too QUIET!flings chopped tuna
<marches through the thread, playing 17 different instruments and shooting confetti out of his ears>
It's too QUIET!flings chopped tuna<marches through the thread, playing 17 different instruments and shooting confetti out of his ears>
17. Wow, that's a neat trick.
17. Wow, that's a neat trick.It's too QUIET!flings chopped tuna<marches through the thread, playing 17 different instruments and shooting confetti out of his ears>
Oh that's nothing. This one time, at band camp ...
On vacation in Houston, maybe going to the zoo tomorrow. Looking forward to the crowds....
On vacation in Houston, maybe going to the zoo tomorrow. Looking forward to the crowds....
Don't feed the animals anything lawful. Feed them chaos, okay?
On vacation in Houston, maybe going to the zoo tomorrow. Looking forward to the crowds....
Sounds lovely. Lots of potential hosts.
Gettin' quiet in here.
GO TEAM CHAOS GO AGAIN!
Gettin' quiet in here.
GO TEAM CHAOS GO AGAIN!
<marches through the thread playing a halibut and shooting streamers out of his nose>
Ooh! A cucumber!
Apologies for my tardiness, I was unavoidably delayed. Blasted traffic. Who's brilliant idea was a Demogorgon Memorial Bypass anyway? Yessssss.
Apologies for my tardiness, I was unavoidably delayed. Blasted traffic. Who's brilliant idea was a Demogorgon Memorial Bypass anyway? Yessssss.
{waves PK Meter over him} You took the M25 London Orbital, didn't you?
rolls into thread on a bicycle with flat tires, wearing a BBQ sauce-stained "Don't Mess with Texas" t-shirt, and carrying an empty tequila bottle
rolls into thread on a bicycle with flat tires, wearing a BBQ sauce-stained "Don't Mess with Texas" t-shirt, and carrying an empty tequila bottle
I'll have you beat this Monday. Mark my words and watch my post.
Apologies for my tardiness, I was unavoidably delayed. Blasted traffic. Who's brilliant idea was a Demogorgon Memorial Bypass anyway? Yessssss.{waves PK Meter over him} You took the M25 London Orbital, didn't you?
*sigh* Yesssss. Despicable place isn't it? Quite a piece of work though. I've met the designer, he's a fine fellow, yesssss. Well, other than his musical taste....
:::Swallowed suddenly by a tear in the time/space continuum:::
"What the f--k!"
:::Falls out of the time/space continuum and lands in Phoenix, Arizona:::
:::Loudspeaker:::
"Oh, they want to race a slaad. Time for some chaos...."
Rolls into the thread in a crash helmet makred #77 draped in a large checker flag carrying a steering wheel and the NASCAR trophy.
I was in Phoenix at the races and I won. Wow! That was the fastest race I ever ran! I brought it home for the team.
Had a blast over the weekend!
I would like to drink some barbecue sauce out of that trophy.
I would like to drink some barbecue sauce out of that trophy.
Yes, you can. But don't dent it. It's mint condition.
I would like to drink some barbecue sauce out of that trophy.Yes, you can. But don't dent it. It's mint condition.
Minty barbecue sauce? Sounds even more chaotic!
Minty barbecue sauce? Sounds even more chaotic!
Not a chaotic as egging an audience of two hundred thousand and letting the yoke run into the race track. We Slaads are made for running on slippery surfaces. Ah the crashes, the chaos.....
That was you? Good show, my boy, good show! Yessss!
Belly-flops into thread wearing lederhosen and a t-shirt which says "Blonds have more fun!", carrying an empty growler and a half-eaten box of chicken wings, and being followed by a flock of snow geese made up to look like clowns.
Good lord man. I'm going to follow you to a party one of these days. I am apparently missing out on something. Yesssss.
In other news, I need suggestions from the anarchic masses. There is a holiday of some sorts next week and I'm unsure how to make appropriate preparations. There will be archons, I'm told. And cake. Yessss, cake.
Good lord man. I'm going to follow you to a party one of these days. I am apparently missing out on something. Yesssss.
In other news, I need suggestions from the anarchic masses. There is a holiday of some sorts next week and I'm unsure how to make appropriate preparations. There will be archons, I'm told. And cake. Yessss, cake.
Food poisoning would be nice. Imagine the projectile vomiting in every possible direction. Loads of fun and even at the Macy Thanksgiving Day Parade I hear.
Belly-flops into thread wearing lederhosen and a t-shirt which says "Blonds have more fun!", carrying an empty growler and a half-eaten box of chicken wings, and being followed by a flock of snow geese made up to look like clowns.
Show off, especially with the belly flop. My NASCAR experience was much better.
Whispers: Where did you get the chicken wings?
Food poisoning would be nice. Imagine the projectile vomiting in every possible direction. Loads of fun and even at the Macy Thanksgiving Day Parade I hear.Good lord man. I'm going to follow you to a party one of these days. I am apparently missing out on something. Yesssss.
In other news, I need suggestions from the anarchic masses. There is a holiday of some sorts next week and I'm unsure how to make appropriate preparations. There will be archons, I'm told. And cake. Yessss, cake.
Last year I used the "Purple Worm in the Turkey" trick. Madness but that was funny. I'm hard pressed to top it, but that's a start.
Food poisoning would be nice. Imagine the projectile vomiting in every possible direction. Loads of fun and even at the Macy Thanksgiving Day Parade I hear.Last year I used the "Purple Worm in the Turkey" trick. Madness but that was funny. I'm hard pressed to top it, but that's a start.
TurDuckWorm?
TurDuckWorm?Food poisoning would be nice. Imagine the projectile vomiting in every possible direction. Loads of fun and even at the Macy Thanksgiving Day Parade I hear.Last year I used the "Purple Worm in the Turkey" trick. Madness but that was funny. I'm hard pressed to top it, but that's a start.
Mmmmm ... turduckworm ....
Yessssss.
Yessssss.
Last year I used the "Purple Worm in the Turkey" trick. Madness but that was funny. I'm hard pressed to top it, but that's a start.Food poisoning would be nice. Imagine the projectile vomiting in every possible direction. Loads of fun and even at the Macy Thanksgiving Day Parade I hear.Good lord man. I'm going to follow you to a party one of these days. I am apparently missing out on something. Yesssss.
In other news, I need suggestions from the anarchic masses. There is a holiday of some sorts next week and I'm unsure how to make appropriate preparations. There will be archons, I'm told. And cake. Yessss, cake.
Perhaps some microscopic slaad larvae in the dressing or gravy, to give it that special flavor. The dinning family could hurl after the larvae has assimilated some of their bio-material. Hmmmm, from their DNA, yes?
I'm looking forward to egging lots of people over Thanksgiving. That will serve them right for serving Tossed Slaad.