Troll Bard's page

For some unreasonable reasons, stupidhead hughmans thinks me, Troll Bard, always thinks me, Troll Bard, trolls people when me does bard stuff. Where dey get such ideas?

Hughmans say, "but you, Troll Bard, you trolls us. You, Troll Bard, sing off-key."

I says all you hughmans, "You are the onesies that trolls me, Troll Bard. What do keys have to do with singing or moosics? You hughmans use keys to make locks open 'cuz you hughmans too weak to use universal key: BREAK IT!"

70. Ghouls just want to have fu-un! Oooh, ghouls just want to have fun!

Me, Troll Bard, is both Bard and Troll, so I predispositioned to be K-Otic Ebil. But me frequents Golarion only on summer vacation. Also, it hard for me to know exactly how often I's CE since the removal of "Sometimes", "Often" or "Always" K-Otic Ebil.

So what happens when we hit 1,001? (we're so close!)

What happens if we exceed it?

I do not knowles, but I thinks there's an "IT'S OVER 1000!" jokes in there somewheres.

And now I contributes

997. Not ebery troll, orge, gi-ants, gobblin, hobbygoblin, kobounder, or the like speaks of self in third personages. Lots of us knows how to speeches! We ares peoples too! (See Charm Peoples description- it affects hoomanoids! We hoomanoids, we peoples! If you charms us, do we not obey?)

We goes stinky poo-poo always in da cornerz, what you think we stupid and go in da middle like Phillip J. Fry?- Oh waits, somebody's alread beats me to the punches! OH KAR-DO-BLAG!

Alsos, dump pits wit scavengers, like otyughs, even jello cubes, and even pears o' annyhillation!

I just eatz 'em for the arteecles, really I do!

Also, pokemonz feelings! Never greatzer feelingz than pickins up a new tricksies from the for-bid-den lores! You getz feelings of accomplicements for gatherins spells and Putin 'em in your spells-booker!

Troll Bard likes to TROLLZ FOR THE LOLS, but to mess wit people's heads in realz lifes is mean and gets u in twouble.

Me alsos not so moozicals, but I kindas likes makings wip da bigs inspeereightional Braveheartz speakes from timez to timez- Perform: oral stories! Alzopes, Troll Bard getz called "Best Bardz EVAR!" when he duz "Empire Couragez" by makin' speakes about u should not want to messes wit us anymorez then u want mess wit a drunks dwarves' beer.

Oh, and if I gets twoos singings, there be plenty songs I get to sings off kees, like "WE'RE GON-NA ROCK DOWNS TOES E-LEC-TRICKS AVE-E-NUES! AND THEN WE TAKES IT HIGHS-ER!" orz "HERE'S A BAAAAD MOONS ARISIN'!"

Youse got that alls? Goods, I'm done, where's mine candied gnome heads? I'm hungry!