Kaartus's page

I like the list Eric Morton most sound plausible and i'll definitely be keeping your list on hand when the time to vote comes.

Kaartus wrote:

Cheapy wrote:

3 archetypes that come in at 750 total between the three? That's 1 submission.

3 archetypes that are 750 words each? That's three submissions and incredible.

I don't think i've ever seen a single archetype that made 750 words, unless every class ability was getting a complete work over.

Then you should see one of the archetypes in Wayfinder #10... shoehorned in (just) within a hair of 1500 words. :)

I think I just saw it, the Malefic Arcanist and the Derro bloodline right?

3 archetypes that come in at 750 total between the three? That's 1 submission.

3 archetypes that are 750 words each? That's three submissions and incredible.

I don't think i've ever seen a single archetype that made 750 words, unless every class ability was getting a complete work over.

I suspect writing a new order for some sort of fiendish Cavalier or somesuch would likely come in at 750 words or there abouts.

Question: what is the submission word limit for archetypes. i.e if I have produced 3 archetypes that come in at 750 words, does that count as 1 entry or all three (maximum) entries?

What is the limitation on the number of times you can spam your 'take 10' truenaming spells?

After reading various comments on the forums, I was quickly realizing that this item probably wouldn't make it. Apart from its cost issues, it's simply not an adventuring item and it's rather hard to make it important to adventures as well. I think it absolutely does make sense that items like this exist in Pathfinder/D&D settings where you have multiple currencies which can be used interchangably for no apparent reason (and indeed, this is why I came up with the concept for my Urbis setting), but this item addresses a genre assumption instead of the needs of adventurers and adventures.

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Banker’s Monocle

Aura faint divination; CL 5
Slot eye; Price 20,000 gp; Weight -

This thick, gold-rimmed monocle is attached to the wearer’s pocket with a lengthy chain.

Whenever the user looks through this monocle, they are able to detect whether any coins they perceive adhere to the coin weight and purity standards for copper, silver, gold, and platinum coins of a long-ago empire. This does not assist in detecting hidden coins - instead, the user perceives the “rightness” of the coin like they would perceive its color.

After the empire which initially created these monocles vanished, its successor states nevertheless continued to use the monocles so that their own coinage would adhere to those same standards, and even today many nations continue to mint coins with the same weight and purity so that their currency would be regarded as trustworthy by others. This has allowed merchants to use currencies from many nations interchangeably without worrying about exchange rates. Today, these monocles serve as a badge of office for many bankers, and many who cannot afford the real thing will nevertheless wear an unenchanted monocle to keep up appearances.

Construction Requirements: Craft Wondrous Item, discern value; Cost 10,000 gp.

I loved this item but I think others were right. It's a 'slice of life' item - which is very cool in it's own way, but not something that most parties would buy.

Certainly i've run games with party members who would buy this item, but it's current cost is a bit steep (by at least 10k) and it should ideally give a little more bang for your buck. Perhaps appraise bonuses, or maybe a bonus to selling or trading goods?

Treads of Momentum

Aura moderate transmutation; CL 3rd
Slot feet; Price 5,000 gp; Weight 3 lbs.

Description:

The wearer of these dark brown leather boots never quite feels perfectly settled on the ground. Upon close inspection a faint change in color is apparent across the sole. Like the opalescence of a sea shell it shifts from pale blue at the top to murky grey at the bottom.

Any round in which a wearer of these boots does not use their full speed in a movement action they may add the difference to their move speed the next round. The wearer must move at least 10 feet for this effect to apply and the bonus speed lasts only for the next round.

If the wearer uses the Bull Rush Combat Maneuver they surge forward as a torrent of water. They may apply their accrued bonus movement to the additional distance they push their target back.

Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, expeditious retreat, hydraulic push; Cost 2,500 gp

I love the concept of these boots, but I couldn't in good conscience upvote them consistently because they were a little prone to abuse. The effect is simply too powerful - the Bull Rush combat maneuver has a for every 5 points you get to move the target back an additional 5 feet for a reason, which is to prevent potential insta kills in dramatic combat.

I had flashbacks to an adventure path game I ran recently on a dock where the barbarian bull rushed the full-plate wearing boss of the encounter into the bay killing him and depriving the party of his sweet loot. If I had to change your item I would suggest giving a +1 to bull rush maneuvers for every 5ft of stored movement. It would make it less powerful and not open to abuse.

Here's mine - this is not the final wording as I did make that rookie mistake (but then I am a rookie and this was my first time entering) of changing the wording at the last second - but as you can see this has the word 'reach', a connonical word in Pathfinder, but not used here in that sense so I changed it - if anyone happened to copy the final version - you could advise what I changed it to (yikes!) I think an earlier draft made a different use of maximize too! I look forward to your comments.

Robe of Resonance
Aura moderate evocation (sonic); CL 10th
Slot body; Price 72,000 gp; Weight 3 lb.
Description
This robe of closely-woven fine red wool, lined with a series of exotic wood panels and other materials decorated with sigils of musical notation, bestows upon the wearer an enhancement to spells and abilities which have an audible effect and which the target is required to hear. When such a spell or ability with an audible effect is begun, the robe billows out as an immediate action and forms a resonating chamber around the wearer to increase the spell or ability’s reach. While wearing the robe of resonance the range of spells and abilities with an audible effect is doubled. Any other prerequisites of the spell or ability must still be met. Spells which require a verbal component but do not require the target to hear them or the effect (such as power word spells) are not enhanced by the robe.

Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, shout; Cost 36,000 gp.

I loved this item. I don't know why it didn't get through. I was thinking of making something similar for bards as they don't have much to buff their spells. Plus the description rocked.

I'd love to know why this item didn't make the cut. Maybe it was formatting?

(Sorry, guys, I don't have time to review everyone's items this year -- maybe I'll get to it after the competition? -- but wanted to pop in when I could.)

Garrick, I assume no one will care if you post your second item, but you may also want to save it as a possible contender for next year (or for Wayfinder or whatever).

Kaartus wrote:

I submitted the following item, i'm hoping that some of you - hopefully some judges as well could give me some feedback on how to improve for next year.

Akene Amulet
Aura Faint Transmutation; CL 4th
Slot Amulet; Price 2,000gp; Weight -
Description
This rounded amulet is covered in dandelion down and strung from a vine cord. Blowing upon the amulet releases the thousands of feathery seeds in a 30ft cone. As the seeds settle upon soil false footprints and tracks form, as the fake trails spread the seeds rapidly mature into a field of flowering dandelions containing the scent of the amulet's owner.

Up to 4 other people may blow upon the amulet before activation in which case the field of flowers contains the scent of those individuals as well and the tracks mirror those that would be left by the characters. Those involved with the activation lose their scent and create no tracks (as per the pass without trace spell) for the next 8 hours. This function works 1/day. The field spreads the misleading scent as the original targets would, though picked flowers lose their magical property but the effect is not negated unless more than half the field is destroyed. Upon the end of the duration the field of dandelion become mundane plants but the tracks remain, decaying as normal.
Construction Requirements
Craft Wondrous Item, Extend Spell, pass without trace; Cost 1,000gp

I'm thrilled you posted, Kaartus, since I loved your item. I think it was actually my favorite of the whole contest after my own. I'm pretty sure I looked for it in the Top 32 right after looking for my own.

I...

Hey cheers Jacob and Garrick for the feedback, I appreciate the input. I have to say I was a bit worried about things like radius of the tracks and whatnot, I should have been more specific, and the only reason I chose to label the effect as a cone was because I thought it would fit with the idea of blowing hard on the fluffy amulet itself.

I also envisioned the item to be one in which PCs might try to set up an ambush by lurking near their false tracks and scent to waylay pursuers or ensure that they had indeed escaped.

As for the template issues, I was sweating that actually. I double, and triple checked before submitting but things got past me and every time I saw my item to vote on it I grimaced and hoped the editing would screw me. I'm still honoured to be in the Top 100 though.

I will consult an English major I know next time and go for a most active voice in my writing style rather than the passive.

Cheers again both of you for the great feedback :).

Runestrip of Enchanting, Lesser

Aura strong varied; CL 6th (type I), 9th (type II), 12th (type III), 15th (type IV), 18th (type V)
Slot —; Price 8,000 gp (type I), 15,000 gp (type II), 21,000 gp (type III), 27,000 gp (type IV), 33,000 gp (type V); Weight —
Description
Filled with runes, these thin strips are usually made of leather or bone and fit neatly against the blade or hilt of a weapon.
Each lesser runestrip of enchanting contains a single +1 weapon special ability, such as flaming or bane. Affixing the strip to a weapon is a full-round action, after which the strip requires 10 minutes to attune itself to the magical energies of the weapon, giving it the contained special ability. Removing the strip is a move action.
Each strip can only be placed on a weapon with a certain highest modified bonus (enhancement bonus plus special ability bonus equivalents, including those from character abilities and spells), depending on the type of the strip (type I strip to a +1 weapon, type II to a +2 weapon, and so on).
A strip can only be placed on a weapon if that weapon could gain that weapon special ability through magic item creation. For example, keen runestrip of enchanting can only be placed on a piercing or slashing weapon. Placing such a strip to a bludgeoning weapon will have no effect. Likewise, the strip would have no effect on a non-magical weapon. Runestrip’s special ability counts towards the weapon’s modified bonus.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, the requirements of the special ability contained within the strip
Cost 4,000 gp (type I), 7,500 gp (type II), 10,500 gp (type III), 13,500 gp (type IV), 16,500 gp (type V)

The only reason I never upvoted this item was because it immediately made me think of the Diablo video game franchise. Mostly Diablo II. I like the idea of having swappable weapon powers - it's a neat concept.

But I think much like the various other submitted items that allowed you to either transfer weapon powers between weapons, or even reforge weapon powers that it felt a bit too much like there isn't enough effort for the pay off. Sure pricing, but one of the hallmarks of D&D is having the right tool for the job but working to get that tool.

A fighter who finds another sword of Frost when he has one of Flaming might sell it, but then rapidly find that he needs that Frost sword to defeat the Red Dragon he just ran across. It becomes the dilemma of whether to horde or sell for the quick pay off.

If you have hot-swappable tags - even ones that take 10 mins it feels like you would just collect or make a variety of those tags so that your fighter, rogue, etc always has the right weapon for the job instead of forcing them to work within their limits.

I don't know, that might just be my quibble. I think the name works, and the concept is alright. If I had to change something maybe it would be the attuning time to an hour or half a day or somesuch. Make the opportunity cost bigger.

Thank you for any feedback...

Cloak of the Pestilent Trespasser
Aura moderate necromancy; CL 7th
Slot shoulders; Price 24,300 gp; Weight 1 lb.
Description
This tattered and stained cloak looks more like a pile of rags then a garment. The wearer may activate the cloak which emanates a disease that causes all living creatures (except the wearer) in a 15-foot-radius spread to become nauseated (Fort DC 17) for 10 minutes. Any hostile action against a nauseated creature allows them a second save (Fort DC 15) to lessen their condition to sickened for the remainder of the duration.
While activated the wearer can choose one nauseated target per round to designate as a carrier. If the carrier fails a second save (Fort DC 17) then the carrier becomes virulent and can spread a weaker strain (Fort DC 15) to any uninfected living creature in 10-foot-radius. Those that make the first save are not susceptible to the carrier.
The cloak can be activated twice a day. Each activation lasts for five rounds. The wearer may choose to deactivate the cloak earlier as a standard action.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, contagion, ghoul touch; Cost 12,150 gp

In my mind the concept is neat, I couldn't see many PCs wearing the item (just because the effect affects all living creatures) but I could absolutely see a villain or minor antagonist doing so. Especially a necromancer.

My one other quibble is the name, Pestilent makes sense but there is nothing to suggest in the write up of the powers that would make me associate illegal intrusion upon the property of another. No break and enter, nor movement or a nefarious sense. I would suggest something like "Cloak of Pestilence" or "Begger's Garments".

Just my two cents.

Cathara wrote:

:( Man, I really didn't think my item was that gross. I mean they're just rats. >.>

:) Here is how you should look at this... Man, I really know how to describe things well in 300 words or less!

This isn't constructive criticism. Constructive, helpful criticism works as follows:

Your item struck me as icky, because the idea of a mouldy rotting magical biscuit that smells so bad that even the rats it attracts/generates won't eat it turns my nose.

However I think the concept is cool, the idea of a reverse mouse-trap one that attracts and creates vermin is nifty and I can see how it could be used.

Personally, I like the item because it sets up things, need to ruin a business or naval voyage, maybe want to undermine a town or settlement - this tool is the surreptitious method of doing so.

I loved the Orc Torc, I loved the notion of being able to acquire very low level ranger favoured enemy power.

Looks like I got into the top 100 but didn't manage to impress the judges. However I welcome any and all feedback anyone wants to provide :)

Dwarven Songwood
Aura faint transmutation; CL 4th
Slot none; Price 2,000 gp; Weight 10 lbs.

Description
This dark rust colored log is soaked in magic and laden with dwarven runes. When burnt the wood releases a relaxing hymn called the Songwood Melody. Creatures sleeping within 60 ft of the music count as receiving long-term care from the heal skill. The fire also burns hot enough to temper non-magical metals. A medium or smaller metal weapon can be hardened with a DC 15 Craft (weapons) check. This takes 1 hour of work and requires water to rapidly cool the metal. Such weapons glow orange when creatures of the orc, goblinoid or giant subtype are within 100 ft and become +1 flaming weapons when within 60 ft of an audible bardic performance. They have no command words and instead are ignited and extinguished based on their proximity to a bardic performance. Their magic fades after 1 day. A log of Dwarven Songwood burns for 10 hours.

Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, cure light wounds, pyrotechnics, creator must be a dwarven bard; Cost 1,000 gp

I loved the songwood, in fact I was really hoping it would make the Top 32. I like the idea of the glowing being a synergistic effect to bard-song.

I think the specific nature of the additional buff is probably what limited it, not every party is going to have a bard so unless the songwood counts as bard-song you are only getting half the benefit from the disposable item.

Otherwise I love the idea of this wood crackling with a dwarven smithing hymm whilst party members sleep to it's sonorous tune.

Huzzah made it to the top 100. Pretty pleased about that. I'm glad people liked my item.

I submitted the following item, i'm hoping that some of you - hopefully some judges as well could give me some feedback on how to improve for next year.

Akene Amulet
Aura Faint Transmutation; CL 4th
Slot Amulet; Price 2,000gp; Weight -
Description
This rounded amulet is covered in dandelion down and strung from a vine cord. Blowing upon the amulet releases the thousands of feathery seeds in a 30ft cone. As the seeds settle upon soil false footprints and tracks form, as the fake trails spread the seeds rapidly mature into a field of flowering dandelions containing the scent of the amulet's owner.

Up to 4 other people may blow upon the amulet before activation in which case the field of flowers contains the scent of those individuals as well and the tracks mirror those that would be left by the characters. Those involved with the activation lose their scent and create no tracks (as per the pass without trace spell) for the next 8 hours. This function works 1/day. The field spreads the misleading scent as the original targets would, though picked flowers lose their magical property but the effect is not negated unless more than half the field is destroyed. Upon the end of the duration the field of dandelion become mundane plants but the tracks remain, decaying as normal.
Construction Requirements
Craft Wondrous Item, Extend Spell, pass without trace; Cost 1,000gp

Woot! My monster is set to be low level and quite urban, this works well. May have to get the flavour a tad more in line but I think it works :)

Low level and quite urban, OR low level and quite urbane (sic) ;).

Woo. My item made it through the first cull as well.

A lot of ZZ gp price this year...

Oh man I just saw a great item, but the price was 9,000gp and the cost to make was also 9,000gp... :(

AH ZZ gp price, my old friend. And on an item I otherwise liked too.

Hey chest item, 4th Ed called, it wants it's s+&$ty magic item mechanics back. It is happy though knowing that one person liked that mechanic.

Right, write or rite? Don't let homophones slow you down!

C'mon don't be homophonic, spelling is hard ;).

A staff by any other name...

... would also be called gloves?

Seems to me like adventurers are pretty likely the target demographic for the song 'Thrift Shop'. I mean they love them some antiquing as well.

Woo! Just hit Dedicated Voter :D.

Okay this one is TITLED after one of the auto-reject rules.

At least it isn't the noun noun noun (sic) item.

Okay, the deeper in I get the more food based or cooking items i'm seeing. By my count i've seen 6 unique food/culinary items.

I hate the retraining items, they seem too meta and make the game too easy.

Oh, cool, a sword that glows in the vicinity of orcs and goblins. Definitely never seen that before. Yep, 100% original idea

No Mister Frodo! Watch out for the goblins!

Boot to the head, now as a swift action I also...

Magical shortstop throws to first...

... is caught by hat of thesaurus eating and disappearing into itself.

Vladamir vs Warwick items hrm... Tough decision.

I like items that deform terrain, not enough of that. Especially few that are reliable.

In fairness while it might not necessarily be Superstar material I will always upvote a camping item over a lot of the dren; RNG Decks/Dice, scabbards, whips, League Champion powers...

Items that give you blackface, not cool bro. Not cool.

ZZschool! Win! Best school ever.

Ain't no school like the ZZschool! OG.

About to crash out. Look forward to seeing how the cull goes when it happens and knock on wood that my item makes it a bit further along.

Just a few more votes though first...

Scabbards, whips and things manipulating time i've seen a lot of. Oh. Also dental themed items.

I feel Panic coming on.

Sounds like you need a pan galactic gargle blaster. Only instead of a lemon wrapped around a gold brick it'll be wrapped around some of the more dense entries.

ZZslot or ZZtop? Your choice.

I just voted for an Item that comes directly from Hitchhiker's guide, because the other one was worse....

I feel Dirty.

Remember. Just KEEP CALM.

Booming scabbard market this year as well. I'm pretty sure it's just a bubble though, and when it bursts there are going to be a lot of really sad dwarven investors.

Saw my item!\^o^/

Paired with a joke item.
Guess what? I voted for my item.

Always vote for your item, can't be assured others will.

The one thing I will never vote for are the RNG Deck of...

I can't believe people still think those items are a good idea.

Why do all these magic items want to hurt my character, or my character's allies?

2014: the year of the masochist. Goes with all the whips this year.

I am pretty excited as well, first time entry into this i'm keen to see how I do.

I love the item that lets me tag out my current character for a new one at pretty much the exact same level.

Do over Mr GM?

Dave Herman wrote:

It costs me how much to buy an item that tells me if my coins are coins?

Aw, I love knowing if my coins are coins. :p

+1.

That makes two turtle named items i've seen. Both badly alliterated. *facepalm*.