Dogbert's page

Chopper Island was a trigger left unused as a curiosity for players and GMs, so you can do what you want of it and it won't mess the adventure, rest assured.

Precisely I did just that on my late sessions, except I connected it with chapter 5 with just a dash of express-expanded dungeon (thanks to Donjon's instant dungeon generator).

It all started with Hemlock being jailed for brutally murdering Chopper's mom, and he was caught in-fraganti. After talking to Helmock, our cleric heroine finds out that he went to seek the missing Brodent Quint, whom no one has seen for days since he went to poke around the Old Light. The last thing the sheriff remembers is walking to Chopper Isle.

...Where he got possessed by Chopper's Ghost, when he finally got back to his senses, he had a bloody knife in his hands, a corpse at his feet, and guards pointing pikes at him. Also, while this happened, Chopper (invisibly) switched bodies to one of the guards, whom he'd use later to create a hostage situation while he was talking with the cleric. Good old Jarvis used his hostage to lure Hemlock again to Chopper Isle, where the ghost plans to exact his final revenge.

The latter parts got a bit messy as silly me forgot about Pazuzu's existance completely and went for something else entirely involving a Vrock, also our heroic cleric wasn't able to figure out what issues still fetter Chopper, so the ghost will still be around to haunt some more. All in all it was a good time or so I hope.

1. By joining their tentacles together with a fashionable brooch and pinning the rest to their bodies in tasteful designs, a hollowed-out Flumph makes for a most stylish handbag worthy of the best fashion designer.

(next?)

I can only think of only one voice for Karzoug... Vincent Price.

Remember 2E, where both PCs and monsters gained only 1 or 2 HP per hit die after lvl 10? Anyone would feel like braving such an end game like that?

On the bad side, we'd all have less HP, yes, but on the good side, monsters would no longer have the absurd amounts of HP that make weapon damage obsolete, even the Evocation School would make sense once more.

Any takers?

Bring friendses next times, they might tasteses better.

Not her friend, I assure you I don't know that woman.

*repeats the same line three times before the morning rooster sings twice*

By the way, snacks? Remember snacks? Theys are still getting away.

I accept both your apology and your invitation to share your snack... there's something about shiny, naive clerics of Iomedae that make them so delectably fun to tease. Just don't shatter her sanity, she wouldn't be as fun then. Would she have any brothers or family in the clergy by chance?

Hows about 'Busy Little Bee' has a better ring to it than 'Busy Little Wasp'?

Stick to 'little wasp' if you want to play it safe.

Wasps have to seek their victims. They have no lure of hoarded sweetness and their song is harsh. And they maim spiders to lay their eggs inside it; fun but not all that lusty.

A wasp may have a tiny waist but then so does an ant and so does a skeleton. The bee is more attractive. Much more.

*is petting her giant wasp of a herald, the Menotherian doesn't look pleased at all* ...and some wasps have two stingers and will also lay their eggs inside anything fleshy enough to feed their larvae. By the way, you're not helping your situation.

Gah! Let's argue later, Busy Little Bee. My snack is running away.

"Bee"? Are you calling me FAT!? From goddess to god, you have one single post to improve my mood.

I bicker enough with Urgathoa over the necrophiles and passional cannibals as to have yet another god stepping on my portfolio's shoes, and Urgathoa just ate the last lawyer Abadar left as mediator so I'll get to the point: Dagon, stay away from the lust domain or I'll give every single orc in Belkzen the hots for you!

The rest can continue, keep making me proud sweeties.

and pass NG are kind andgood but not disciplined or commited enough...

*gasps* Neutral Good is what!?

And to think I was considering helping you... that's it, I'm staying out.

::rolls initiative:: 16! I cast Magic Circle Against Good!

*Backs away slowly... far from Jordan* ...as an acollyte to the Eternal Rose I declare... that this won't be pretty, I'm out.

Just having fun poking at this. The Paizoians left too many dangling threads in their world not to try and tie them in knots.

*Forcefully keeps himself from making a vulgar addendum about dangling things for the sake of keeping the thread in good, tentacly taste*

The raping and killing is usually done to different people. (Take care not to confuse those two groups)

Damn! So it actually was kill their cows and rape their women? Excuse me while I go get a new pillaging manual... and a doctor.

<PARODY>
How many times has this happened to you?

GM: The mass of vegetative matter rises up before you, its branches flailing like the tentacles of a squid being sucked into a whirlpool, its gaping maw revealing nasty, throny teeth. Roll for initiative!

Player: Hey guys—that's a tendriculos. It regenerates, but if we use bludgeoning weapons and acid, we'll be fine. Don't waste your mind-influencing spells—they won't work. And don't bother trying to flank it—it's immune to crits.

I can hear your collective sighs. Of course, you could combat this with a collection of monster books that takes up two bookshelves, or you could nerf the Knowledge skills to make sure the PCs can't know everything your players do.

...or you could actually grow a spine as DM! Yes! With our new line of DM self-help books, you too can develop what it takes to make clear statements like:

1) And how the hell does your character know what a Tendriculous is??

2) Do you have the required Knowledge: Religion ranks to know a lich' weakpoint is his phyllactery?

...and our writers' favorite

3) Metagamers will get no XP for the rest of the adventure, the DM has spoken.

Yes! You too can grow a pair, order your copy today!
</PARODY>

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Parodies apart... I love the idea of guidelines for creating my own monsters, I'd buy the book, but the advertisement can't be more SAD, as if characters developing expertise was actually a bad thing.

Sure, every table has a player that will try to metagame his way beyond what his character knows (ie his personal experience and/or knowledge skills), but if the DM can't stop metagaming in his table himself, then his problem is not players knowing, it's spinelessness.