Bydar WAS drawn to a life of faith, but the religion that called to him wasn't a powerful one, or at least it wasn't terribly respected in Brevoy. He found himself drawn to Shelyn, the goddess of love, beauty, art and music. He even found some small talent for sculpting. Yes, he would be happy with this faith, even if his parents not-so secretly wished he'd found a more prominent church to partake in.
Of course, a man with an appreciation of love and beauty would not be adverse to seeking it out in a companion. For Bydar, it was found in Adula Orlovsky. Another minor noble, she had little to offer in dowry, but her beauty was something to behold. Her eyes sparkled like starlight, and her hair was as dark and intriguing as the night. Her voice was that of an angel...
Adula enjoyed his company. No surprise, as Bydar was a likable and handsome young man. It seemed even his goddess thought so, for soon his training was complete, and he was raised to the status of cleric.
He returned, hoping to propose to Adula now that he was at least respectable. But while his interest had not dimmed, Adula had fallen in love with one of his brothers!
Brayton was only a little older than he, and truth to tell, a good man and he seemed to love Adula mightily. But though Bydar tried to accept Adula's choice with grace, it gnawed inside him over the weeks as the wedding approached.
Thus it was, on the night before the wedding, that Bydar watched the two dance, and laugh... and they were happy. His faith told him he should be joyous for them, but later that night, the cold grip of envy engulfed Bydar. His brother had gotten more than a little tipsy, and trusting his younger brother for help, was going down the lonely steps outside the back of the estates.
Then Bydar deliberately tripped the drunk and confused Brayton down the steps. Down his sibling tumbled, until he fell with a horid crack, and blood flowed from Brayton's skull.
And Bydar suddenly came to his senses. He had betrayed not just his brother, who had always treated him kindly, but Adula, for Brayton was HER heart. Lastly, he had betrayed Shelyn. He had turned on love with jealousy.
Racing down the steps, he found the power of his goddess seeming to leave him, unable to heal what he had done. Begging his goddess for forgiveness, not for his own sake, but the sake of Brayton and Adula's love... his plea was answered, and the wound healed itself.
Brayton did not recall being pushed. Rather, when he came to, he thanked his brother and over for 'saving' his life. Bydar felt the shame rise in his belly the whole time and tried to stave off any further thanks, but that merely made him seem modest in the eyes of his kinsfolk and Adula herself.
Bydar watched the wedding...and then? Then he fled. He had to get away. The shame cut too deep. He could never face either of them again. How could he?
His goddess, to judge by the spells he regained, had forgiven him. But Bydar is not sure he can ever forgive himself.
Reason he can't or won't go home: Bydar sees Adula, and he feels longing for her, and shame for the fratricide he almost commited. At this point, he'd rather move to Devil infested Cheliax than stay in Brevoy proper. Compared to that, the River Kingdoms , wild as they are, seem like a haven.
Plot hooks for later:
2) Bydar realizes how closely he came to falling under the sway of Zon-Kuthon by his actions. What he doesn't know is that agents of Zon-Kuthon maybe aware of it, or even had a hand of it. Perhaps one of the noble guests for the wedding was a cleric of that dark god, and seeing his weakness, exploited with magic, or poisoned words to drive him deeper into despair. If Bydar heading to the wildlands to help others establish order becomes known, said Cleric may decide that's not a bad idea, but better to start a strong hold for Zon-Kuthon that his weak half sister. In short, Bydar may have a dark rival he is unaware of.