
Dread Captain Devon |

Bad GM NAUGHTY! Sick...again...hot...family...anyway back to the show...
Quillin opens the door to find the small lodge is stuffed with furniture including a comfortable bed, writing desk, cooking gear, an armoire and several barrels of food. The room stinks of rotting flesh and food with large botflys buzzing about the space.
In the center of the room, just a pace or two off the bed is a hooded corpse, draped in a hodge podge of wrecked sailor clothing. The body hangs from a chain that has been wrapped and is hanging from the center ceiling beam. A grim welcome to what once was a cozy cabin in the woods.

Hassan Al-Quorri |

Hassan peers his head around Bart's shoulder and over Quillin's head. "PWAAH! What a stink."
"At least we know the building is unoccupied. What living thing could stand such a smell? A thousand praises and one be upon your head, Bart, if you will see to removing that corpse from our new lodgings, and I will do my best to make this room livable, at least for the evening."
The sorcerer prepares to make liberal use of his Prestidigitation cantrip, to clean and de-stink the room.

Bartolomeo da Cofresi |

Bart shrugs and drops the chest in the middle of the hut. He moves to the bed and grabs the corpse unceremoniously, lifts it onto his huge shoulders and hauls it outside.
Can I do a heal check to see if Bart can guess how long its been dead? 1d20 ⇒ 1
Derp... "OMG guys, I think this guy died back when the Eye of Abendego was formed!!"

DM Devon |

Oooo Goodie
Bart moves to the center of the room and using a nearby stool steps up and "unhooks" the man from the chain. Bart is actually familiar with the set up having been threatened to be thrown in one more than once as it of Chelaxian make; a more "civilized" device designed to ensure a more "proper" hanging than a basic rope.
With his arm around the body the tall brawler lifts the body from the chain and drops it unceremoniously on the floor. Disturbing to everyone is the part where the body doesn't fall but stands completely erect in place, emits a sort of warbling gasping hiss/scream type sound and promptly jumps onto Bart.
B 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (11) + 5 = 16
M 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (7) + 8 = 15
H 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (4) + 2 = 6
A 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (11) + 3 = 14
Q 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5
F 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (12) + 4 = 16
B 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (6) + 1 = 7
M 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (13) + 3 = 16
H 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21
A 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5
Q 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (13) + 3 = 16
F 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (1) + 5 = 6
Wight Sucker Punch 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10
The creature's sudden strike falls thankfully short as Bart is only now too keenly aware that this "person's" hands and nails reek of decay. Probably not a good idea to get touched by them.
Most of the group, still adrenaline primed and wary from the day's earlier activities are caught off guard at the sudden outburst but are ready to act. The sorcerer and wizard however, too overcome by the putrid stench and sudden flurry of activity, fail to find the reserves of energy to spring into action as quickly.
Quelle Suprise!
Formerly Hanging Undead [Acted]
Hassan [Surprised]
Mel [Not Surprised]
Quillin [Surprised]
Bart [Not Surprised]
Fjori [Not Surprised]
Ajani [Not Surprised]
There is your initiative, Mel is up with others to follow. Standard actions only then we shall move on to "Round 1"

Ajani Ihejirika |

Ajani will cast Hydraulic Push against the undead, hoping to either push the thing far enough away from the group that it can't make full use of whatever offensive abilities it may have or, if his allies get first crack, to give them enough room to make full use of their own attack prowess.
Hydraulic Push (Bull Rush): 1d20 + 5 + 3 ⇒ (10) + 5 + 3 = 18

Dread Captain Devon |

Sorry weird tech issues
Mel and Ajani responds as best they can; MEl's shot goes wide and while Ajani does catch the creature in a spray of water it only moves a few feet pushed against the bed.
The creature surges forward into the gap, this time lashing out with claws at Fjori and Bart as it continue to issue a sort of warbling gurgle noise. You can see that rotting jagged teeth are starting to work at the hood as the creature is struggling to unmask itself while fighting.
Claw v Bart: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (17) + 5 = 22
Calw v Fjori: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (7) + 5 = 12
Damage!: 1d6 + 3 ⇒ (4) + 3 = 7
Bart is caught by the wicked claws of the creature as a thin gashes rupture on the brawler's skin. Bart can feel a sinister sensation seizing at his limbs to render him paralyzed. DC 15 or be paralyzed for 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2 rounds.
Fjori manages to fend off the wild strike from the creature as it lashes out at the pair.
[Same order, Round 1, no more surprise.]

Hassan Al-Quorri |

Not wanting to be drawn within range of either teeth or claws, Hassan summons forth a blast of water, seeking to knock the creature to the ground, then backs away as best he can.
Ranged Touch Attack => 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5
HP: 4/18
1st Lvl Spells: 0/6
Water Blasts: 4/7

Fjori Ulfsson |

Fjori again attacks the corpse with both his cutlass, hoping to destroy the foul creature before the swarm could gather strength.
Attack-Melee: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23
Damage: 1d6 + 4 ⇒ (6) + 4 = 10
Attack-Melee: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23
Damage: 1d6 + 4 ⇒ (2) + 4 = 6
Confirm Crit #1: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 4 = 5
crit damage: 1d6 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
Confirm Crit #2: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23
crit damage: 1d6 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 = 3

Dread Captain Devon |

Fjori savages the creature with cutlass strikes and his blades bite deep into the thing that was surely once a man. Is he carrying the
tidewater cutlass? if so one of those attacks has +1 att/dam
The creature bellows out a hollow moan as the first blade passes easily into the ribs as Fjori practically tears the creature's torso in half. The second cutlass swing strike a clean divot in the creature's forehead, tearing the mask clean off and abruptly ending the creatur's yell. The distorted rotting face of a man gasps a final time and slumps to ground dead.
Master Quillin and Mistress Evendale you may fire when ready.

Dread Captain Devon |

Are you carrying two +1 cutlasses because your attack and damage is the same in each hand? Am I forgetting another magical weapon? Ugh living with a toddler makes the brain tired!
Quillin banks the flask off the building and the contents splash in a loud popping whoosh of sudden sputtering flame. The liquid conflagration does not utterly destroy the now significant swarm of creatures but many certain do die from the flame.
Mel and then the swarm
Edit: Daniel something is weird and Herolab isn't right? In your primary is the Tidewater (I assume) so you should be +3 BAB +3 Str +1 WF + 1 Magical (7 Total). Also note that cutlasses are not light so with TWF you are at a net -4 to each hand. So you should be +3/+2 unless you off hand is magical or masterwork? Can you check that for me? Also as an aside don't forget your bane ability, it a group buff too.

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Yes I have 2 magic cutlasses. The tidewater one, and another +1 we found earlier (cannot remember from where) and I do keep forgetting my bane..thanks for the reminder... it's an extra +1 for everyone...I will check herolab and see...ok it looks like +4/+4..I can send you the .por file if you want..and here is an export of the character sheet. I was not able to create the tidewater cutlass yet, so have it as a spell storing +1 cutlass..I would have thought it would be released with the AP info. If you use HeroLab, have you tried the ipad version..real slick!!
Fjori Ulfsson
Male Human (Ulfen) Ranger (Freebooter) 3
NG Medium Humanoid (human)
Init +5; Senses Perception +7
Aura freebooter's bane +1
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Defense
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AC 15, touch 11, flat-footed 14 (+4 armor, +1 Dex)
hp 34 (3d10+9)
Fort +5 (+4 vs. hot or cold environments and to resist damage from suffocation), Ref +4, Will +2
--------------------
Offense
--------------------
Speed 30 ft.
Melee +1 Cutlass +4 (1d6+4/18-20/x2) and
. . +1 Spell Storing Cutlass +4 (1d6+2/18-20/x2) and
. . Axe, boarding +6 (1d6+3/x3) and
. . Cutlass +7 (1d6+3/18-20/x2) and
. . Dagger +6 (1d4+3/19-20/x2)
Ranger (Freebooter) Spells Prepared (CL 0):
--------------------
Statistics
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Str 17, Dex 12, Con 14, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 12
Base Atk +3; CMB +6; CMD 17
Feats Endurance, Improved Initiative, Toughness +3, Two-weapon Fighting, Weapon Focus (Cutlass)
Traits Armor Expert, Shackles Seafarer
Skills Acrobatics +0, Climb +6, Craft (ships) +6, Escape Artist +0, Fly +0, Handle Animal +6, Heal +6, Intimidate +6, Knowledge (geography) +7 (+9 while in water terrain), Knowledge (nature) +7, Perception +7 (+9 while in water terrain), Profession (sailor) +6, Ride +0, Stealth +6 (+8 while in water terrain), Survival +7 (+9 while in water terrain, +8 to track), Swim +9 (+13 to resist nonlethal damage from exhaustion)
Languages Common, Polyglot, Skald
SQ combat styles (two-weapon combat), favored terrain (water +2), spell storing, track, wild empathy
Other Gear Lamellar (leather) armor, +1 Cutlass, +1 Spell Storing Cutlass, Axe, boarding, Cutlass, Dagger, 67 GP
--------------------
Special Abilities
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Armor Expert -1 Armor check penalty.
Endurance +4 to a variety of skill checks. Sleep in L/M armor with no fatigue.
Favored Terrain (Water +2) (Ex) +2 to rolls vs Favored Terrain (Water).
Freebooter's Bane +1 (Ex) +1 to hit & damage versus chosen target.
Shackles Seafarer +1 trait bonus on Knowledge (nature) and Knowledge (geography) checks while on the ocean. You also gain a +1 trait bonus on Swim checks, and Swim is always a class skill for you.
Spell Storing Store a spell of up to 3rd level in weapon.
Track +1 Add the listed bonus to survival checks made to track.
Wild Empathy +4 (Ex) Improve the attitude of an animal, as if using Diplomacy.

Dread Captain Devon |

Ok actually that works. +3+3+1+1 = 8, 8-4 = +4. I can do math! It is subtracting -4 because the cutlasses aren't light. Moving forward if you can get the off hand to a light weapon you would be +6/+6. I actually was scratching my head at this because I thought you should be hitting harder (I thought cutlasses were light)and was disturbed that your attach was too low...Funny. Don't mess with HeroLab!

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HEhe..I know..I was using a boarding ax in my off hand...I just need to find a magical one!!I would also be willing to offer the other +1 cutlass to anyone who wanted it...Fjori is simply carrying it because no one else seemed to want it. Now the tidewater one..he will keep..mostly because of who owned it before him!!!

Melissa Evendale |

well no area weapons so.. heres the revision
Mel slings her crossbow and moves to help Bart.. knowing that she won't be able to carry the muscular boxer who must outweigh her by two to one she gestures to Fjori..
"Let's get him out off here"

Dread Captain Devon |

2d6 ⇒ (2, 5) = 7
Mell grabs the Chelaxian and drags the unresponsive man out the door, the smaller woman grunting as she shifts the brawlers wide shoulders and considerable mass.
Finally coalesced to a fog more than the size of a man the screaming buzzing mosquito/fly creatures hum across the room. They swing past Fjori and Hassan (AOO for you both), seemingly moved purely by a need to revenge against that which hurt them. Quillin finds himself harried by the tiny creatures pecking and picking at him.
Quillin I need a Fort save. You also take 7 damage.
Init is up, act away.

Fjori Ulfsson |

Fjori will take a swipe at the creature as it buzzes past him
Making this my chosen foe, so +1 to hit and damage, as does everyone else.
Attack-Melee: 1d20 + 8 + 1 ⇒ (2) + 8 + 1 = 11
Damage: 1d6 + 4 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 4 + 1 = 10
Ah, evil dicebot...I had wondered where you were!!LOL

Hassan Al-Quorri |

Hassan takes a quick swipe at the swarm with his shortspear as they come barreling past.
Melee Attack => 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (19) + 1 = 20
Damage => 1d6 ⇒ 3 (Half damage against swarms with a piercing weapon, so 2?)
Thinking quickly, Hassan pulls from his sash a vial of Alchemist's Fire long secreted there, and waits for Quillin to move clear of the swarm before giving it a heave at the billowing mass of insects.
Holding Action until Quillin moves, then:
Ranged Touch Attack => 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (5) + 2 = 7
Damage => 1d6 ⇒ 3
Oh to hell with you, RNG.