If you must know...
I've been told I'm a terrible cleric because of my domain, feat, and spell selection.
If you must know...
I've been told I'm a terrible cleric because of my domain, feat, and spell selection.
I blame that infernal Sorting Hat.
I know! I didn't even qualify for the class. It was a complete waste of a level.
I've learned my lesson, though, so I'm going to take a level in Blackguard next.
<Hands CH a sheet with crayon marks all over it, pentagrams in permanent marker, and is that Angel Fish looking like a fish stick in the oven? The value listed next to Strength is a symbol of pain.>
Here you go. I used some optimizations I found on the Internet.
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<Hands CH a sheet with crayon marks all over it, pentagrams in permanent marker, and is that Angel Fish looking like a fish stick in the oven? The value listed next to Strength is a symbol of pain.>
Here you go. I used some optimizations I found on the Internet.
I didn't realize realize "I <heart> Asmodeus" was a feat.
Oh, that reminds me, under the new ruleset I get more feats.
<Writes in "I spade your poodle", "I club baby seals", and "I diamond a greater share of the treasure">
I'm all set now!
Can Paladins from Nevada join this thread. I like succubus strippers. I gamble too.
We welcome everyone here, from diabolical microwaves to foul-mouthed dretches. We've even got a fish. And one or two celestials.
Boss, I take it we're switching from the usual bobbing for turnips this year?
It wasn't the turnips that were a problem, but the turpentine they were floating in.
Healer, Healer, I've been thinking,
What in 9 Hells have you been drinking?Is it whiskey, is it wine?
Oh my gods, it's turpentine!
{starts on another Leng Island Iced Tea}
Hmmm. It tasted like lemonade to me.
Whoa! I didn't know I could summon undead!
Um, could you kindly gnaw on that heretic's brain.
<Points in a random direction>
Hey! Why are you pointing at me?
Hey! Why are you pointing at me?Whoa! I didn't know I could summon undead!
Um, could you kindly gnaw on that heretic's brain.
<Points in a random direction>
I assure you it has nothing to do with me imagining how you'd look battered and fried.
Seriously? I never thought I would have to ask this but... How many of you are completely drunk right now?
Hang on, I'm trying to remember when I was last sober.
Mmmm, I'm really hungry for fish and chips right now. Or maybe fried calamari.
{pops into thread} Oooo, this place looks nice and Lawful. I'll just hide in this punchbowl. {hops into Angel Fish's bowl}
Seriously? I never thought I would have to ask this but... How many of you are completely drunk right now?
Define completely dunkshhh...
{suspiciously eyes weird cauliflower thingie in the fishbowl}
Seriously? I never thought I would have to ask this but... How many of you are completely drunk right now?Define completely dunkshhh...
Drunk enough to think up something like a self-multiplying rat or a frog made of lethal flubber?
{suspiciously eyes weird cauliflower thingie in the fishbowl}
Drunk enough to think up something like a self-multiplying rat or a frog made of lethal flubber?Seriously? I never thought I would have to ask this but... How many of you are completely drunk right now?Define completely dunkshhh...
I shouldn't have been wearing that helmet that made my thoughts come to life.
Here ya go boss!
I'm trying out a new recipe I made up myself.
A blend of squid, turnips, and goat cheese. Pretty good, huh?
A blend of squid, turnips, and goat cheese. Pretty good, huh?
I have OJ and Vodka. Anyone care for a round or two? I can make Cap Cods if you need them.
A blend of squid, turnips, and goat cheese. Pretty good, huh?
Mmmm, tasty! {wolfs down more}
A blend of squid, turnips, and goat cheese. Pretty good, huh?
{stomach rumbles} Man, I sure miss having hands. {hops home to evict squatter iBrain}
No one liked my Bloody Marys...
No one liked my Bloody Marys...Where did you wind up hiding the bodies, if I might ask?
Oven suggested some recipes. You remember the series of pork dishes? The ones everyone thought were too stringy?
Do forgive my tardiness. I had to attend to some meat that was going to spoil. I've brought a chianti. Excellent vintage. It seems the perfect pairing for Celestial Follower's menu. Angel Fish, your bowl smells of cheap perfume and shame. Shall we dine?
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Oven suggested some recipes. You remember the series of pork dishes? The ones everyone thought were too stringy?...
Where did you wind up hiding the bodies, if I might ask?
Hey, don't blame me - those recipes turned out fine on Iron Chef. Although Alton did keep whining about something called "kuru." I think it was some Papua New Guinea spice or condiment or something.
I'm going to run out of faux leather placemats.
You'll have to tan some heretic hides to make more.
Faux heretics? Or rich Corinthian heretics?
I bet we could find some heretics in Corinth...You'll have to tan some heretic hides to make more.Faux heretics? Or rich Corinthian heretics?
You can always use members of Nevada's Tea Party if you can't find any in Corinth...
This hellhound followed me home. Can we keep him? Pwease???
I'll call him Connie (short for Conflagration).
Ah, ah, ahhhhhccccchhhhooooooooo!
Ah, ah, ahhhhhccccchhhhooooooooo!remove disease
CF, clean that up.
Oh, look, Connie already took care of it. Isn't that...
No, Connie, don't sneeze!
Well, I didn't like those curtains anyway.
*Sigh*
This place isn't the same without CH getting all exasperated. I miss hearing, "CF take that thing off your head. You don't know where it's been."
*Sigh*
Oh hey boss, you're back!
I was just sampling new flavors for my next culinary creation...