Shadowborn's page

*tips hat*

Thank you kindly, sir. I appreciate the food for thought.

Narrowing it down to the top 50% wasn't difficult. Picking 8 to vote for out of those top 16 though, that took some time.

Whoops, yeah, my bad. I meant Wells. Edited my one post, but too late for the other. Apologies for the confusion.

Shadowborn wrote:

I was impressed by how they managed to work in sexual tension between Wells and Hartley without any direct dialogue.

I guess I really missed something. What are you talking about?

There was a certain amount of sexual tension between the two of them during the chess game. I thought I'd imagined it at first, until they mentioned later about Hartley's coming out estranging him from his family. I'm thinking there was more to West and Hartley's relationship than just "boss" and "number one guy."

Celibate- "Abstaining from marriage and sexual relations, typically for religious reasons." Oxford English Dictionary Online.

And its a quote from a comedy film, the name of which escapes me at this moment. I am pretty sure its being used correctly. Maybe its got an older rare meaning.

Yes, and the response is also a quotation, from another comedy film, The Princess Bride and apropos, considering that the joke from the first one is adequately ironic, so they go well together.

Wells is a master manipulator, so it's hard not to feel sorry for anyone that falls under his influence. Whether he intended for anyone other than Barry to be affected remains to be seen, though Hartley wasn't so much affected as afflicted, since he was injured and had the implants to help.

I was impressed by how they managed to work in sexual tension between West and Hartley without any direct dialogue.

So, this week's episode with the Pied Piper. Great episode, or greatest episode?

Sean K. Reynolds covered these in his original advice thread, but they bear repeating.

• Don't make a joke item:
  Seriously, just don't. It doesn't matter how funny it is, it's not superstar. It was great for the April Fool's issue of Dragon, but notice they only did that once a year. It's a niche thing, and not everyone may share your sense of humor. The idea of the contest is to design a really cool magic item, not a really funny one. Puns are especially bad. Your blue tooth that fits in a person's ear and allows them to send message spells at will isn't especially clever, nor is it a good joke. And speaking of bluetooth...

• Don't make magic items that mimic real world technology:
  It's not particularly creative, and most things will be easy to identify as technology that's been reskinned as magic. There should be some innovation. Besides, most tech items provide fairly mundane and uninteresting (if wondrous) abilities.

Another adventure inside a dead monster, and I'm digging it. There's a good amount of inspiration here for an interesting adventure--a lot to turn the designing gears in my head to come up with a story for this thing. My inner 5th grader is disappointed that there's no exit near the tail labeled "back door." Otherwise, I'm happy with this as a rough draft for a really unique and interesting adventure site.

That poor treant. Vermin nesting in his head, a mad fey living in his leg, and those humanoids are probably hacking wood off of his corpse to keep their fire going. The indignity of it all...

There's a lot going on in this map that I really like. I agree with Jacob that everything feels a bit scrunched together, at too small a scale. I'm a little disappointed at the generality of the labeling. "Predator," "humanoid," and "fey" leave things vague. Why not go with specifics like "arumvorax," "hobgoblins" and "redcap?" Though I suppose if you're supplying the map that someone else may turn into an encounter in a later round, you're doing that person a favor and leaving them room for development. That said, there's enough of a story in this map that I'd be inspired to write up encounters for it.

Good job, and best of luck to you in this round.

This is a solid town map. I like differences in terrain and that the town's layout has a very organic feel to it. I can almost see a time lapse of its growth in my mind's eye. The important themes--government, commerce, religion--have their designated areas, and there are little unique touches (pilgrim's stair, witch's watch) that give the place its own flavor. Good job, and best of luck in this round.

I found the layout of the place interesting, and there are certain features that incite curiosity (what's in those hollow pillars, for example) but there's a whole lot of empty space, no indication of anything in the rooms. Like some of the other commenters I'm wondering about the levels of the place, whether there's flooding, and the map doesn't really give details to know for sure.

Not the cleanest work in the running, but the location is provocative, there's a lot of interesting stuff in the area, and I could see this turning into the location for some cool adventures.

I'm really, really hoping the dinosaur ghosts aren't just going to be unmasked as Farmer Johnson and his lizardfolk buddies, who would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those meddling kids and their dog.

Thanks for the feedback, Jaragil. The runes were there because I needed a look, and a weapon inscribed in runes has that sort of "classic cool" to it. I suppose the bookkeeping could be off-putting, and Mark did mention the munchkiny idea of the owner sundering party items (which is still a very odd thought to me...I've just never gamed with people that thought that way.)

But potions? Honestly? How exactly do you sunder a liquid? It's the liquid that's magical, not the bottle it's held in. Scrolls, sure. They're solid. They can be destroyed. Potions? Tell that GM to turn in his/her screen.

Sorry, DungeonmasterCal. If I'd known you needed it 3 years ago...well, I couldn't have done anything about it, because Kobold Press asked for it last year. Still, if you pick it up, I hope you find it useful and fun. I definitely had a blast writing it.

The only way you could completely exclude sexuality from your game is have everyone be androids.

Wrong.

Been coming up with dead-end searches. Searches on the composers and the track title keep coming back to that one album of sci-fi themes, which was released in '86, and then re-released in 1989 under a different label.

Wow. You managed to give us three fairly detailed levels and a side view. While an (abandoned) dwarven stronghold isn't exactly original, it has a compelling layout and definitely inspires interest. Well done!

Thanks for the feedback! I'll make sure to take it into account in future projects and, in particular, if I make the top 8 of this competition.

I have a partial response to some of the things Crystal said but I'm worried it might violate the contest rules. Nothing nasty or anything, just that it could (though it would be a stretch) be interpreted as "clarifying" matters, though it's of a purely technical nature and not directly about the content of the map. Can I make that point here, or should I take it to PMs? I'd prefer here in case others have the same concerns.

Just let your work stand on its own. No public statements. There's always time later.

You had me at "encroaching lava."

I meant to touch on that a bit in "Write What You Know." That's an excellent addition, especially considering someone had an entry with a name identical to an iconic staff that's been in the game since 1st edition AD&D.

Great advice, Jeff! Except for the "don't rush" part. ;)

Well, there are always exceptions to every rule. Though I suppose you could modify it for this contest to say: Don't turn in your map as soon as you think you're finished. Take a little extra time if you have it and go back to it later to finish up details, maybe make some changes to things that look wrong, etc. Just don't wait until the last minute in case your email goes down right before the deadline.

There are a lot of folks already doing item critiques, so I'll take a pass on that. (Though if you want my specific thoughts on an item, feel free to shoot me a PM.) Instead I'm going to do a list of general advice to address a number of stumbling blocks I saw this year.

• Read the Rules:
  It seems a bunch of people jumped right in this year, as they seem to do every year, without learning about what they're getting into first. So you have disqualifications right off the bat, because people submitted wondrous items unaware of the format change.

  Speaking of format, a whole lot of items didn't do as well because entrants used an improper format, or sometimes no format at all. While not every voter places as much value on formatting as some, nearly everyone will vote for the better formatted item out of two equally creative pieces of work. You can't follow the rules and do your best if you don't know what's required of you.

• Write What You Know:
  This is one of those cliches that gets thrown at writers all the time. However, it's cliche because it's true. If you show, as a writer, that you don't have command of the language, or the subject you're writing about, then you've lost your reader (in the case of this contest, your voter).

  Don't assume you know everything. Go back to basics. Creating a staff? Then go look at the rules for staff creation in the book. To this day, when looking up rules for a game, I'll find that I'm remembering things from 3.5 that were changed in Pathfinder. It's never wrong to refresh your memory on how things function. That includes the language you're using. There are certain formats for rules that are used. If you're using them, then your item will look and sound more like a Pathfinder item. For example, the use of "to" and "on" in reference to bonuses. You add a bonus "to" a static number (+2 enhancement bonus to Strength) but you add a bonus "on" a roll or check (+5 competence bonus on Bluff checks).

  Some of the most painful voting moments I had were where people used language that was either ambiguous, or simply wrong. (Don't call your item a "bodkin" if it's not a dagger. Yes, there are types of arrows that go by that name, but they're "bodkin arrows," not just "bodkins." "Frog-crotch" is another type of arrowhead, but most people wouldn't think of naming their item the "Frog Crotch of Scalping.") If you're going to pull out the 25 cent words, be sure you're using them correctly. Also be sure you're using them appropriately. Use the beautiful language for the item description. Stick to plain language when dealing with the actual mechanics.

• Think Like A Designer:
  This one's tricky and not always easy to define. I'd define it as "think about your item from multiple perspectives. In other words, if you're approaching your item creation by saying "I'm going to make the coolest item for a fighter ever!" then you're being too limited on your perspective. You're designing an item as a player. You're looking at something from the perspective of how cool it would be to have such an item in a game. That's good, but it's not enough. There were plenty of items in this year's mix that seemed cool on the surface, but once I started thinking about running a game where one of the PCs had a particular item, I'd see the nightmare that it would cause (in terms of action economy, or slowing the game down to determine the effects, or some other thing that would cause a general headache in play rather than roleplay).

  Likewise, you can't look at it purely from a GM's perspective either. That's how you end up with items that aren't so much an item as they are a plot device, or an item that would be fine for an evil character, but would likely be destroyed by a more traditional party of heroic PCs who won't sell it because it will just end up in the hands of some other villain.

  I fell into this trap myself this year. Mark Seifter's comment on my item talked about a nightmare scenario where players would sacrifice their own items to power up the weapon. It had not even occurred to me. That kind of munchkinism is not the way I play, and it's not how my group plays. I could easily argue that a good GM can keep this from happening. (It's not like hacking things to bits in the next room is quiet. One Perception check and the monsters in the next room are coming in to attack, or preparing themselves for battle.) However, my group isn't the mass of Pathfinder players at large, and not every GM is going to handle things the same way. It's something that I should have considered during the design process. I left a loophole for potential abuse of the item, and it cost me.

So, that's it. Feel free to discuss or question. Hopefully this will be of use to those participating next year.

Found this article on io9 the other day: 10 rule for making better fantasy maps.

In the tradition of Castle Ravenloft, the fortress of Scarwall from the Curse of the Crimson Throne AP was a pretty impressive map.

By the time Tuboo/Magnus returns, the sun has begun to sink towards the mountains beyond the fortress, shadows deepening among the peaks, and the sky reddening.

Kroop isn't crucial to the adventure (though why anyone thought it was a good idea to murder the ship's cook is beyond me...) though he does provide a lot of advice along the way in the early going that the PCs will either have to do without, or you could have it provided by another source (perhaps Sendara).

Always teh sex. Teh sex is teh hot. Always teh sex.

Seriously though, the extent to which sexuality plays a part in a campaign is entirely up to the group playing, and how much they're comfortable with entertaining during a gaming session.

Yes, that's it. And no, slapstick is fine. I was remiss in my listing.

Sure thing. All the nets I saw this year were pretty creative and fairly good, but yours was top of the list in its category.

My Top 32:

alchemist's retort
bonewarp chain
catapulting full plate
Deadeye's shepherd
depth charger
dreamcatcher staff
fool's scepter
ghast hide
harlequin's hurlbat
harvestweal
the hero's breath
honeycomb cuirass
kudzu wrap
living copperthread net
mail of ash-woven ramparts
mother's rod of sanguine blessings
moveable rod (though every time I wrote it down, I wrote mobile)
mummer's rod
nesting needle
ooze wrath blunderbuss
psychopomp's crosier
rifle of the hallowed hand
ring of the ooze
rod of the iron rose
rod of the unrelenting master
scales of the scarab
shield of embers
soulshifter staff
staff of the vineyard
swarm-strike caster
tunnel fighter's ring
(weapon) catching shield? (Dropped the ball on my notetaking, and can't quite read my handwriting on this one. I do remember that it was the only wooden shield of the bunch that had this property, and the one I thought handled the mechanics best.)

While I'm not going to post often in thus thread, I'm going to pick on Jeff for a moment: really? A pun name in Superstar? I don't mind the item (though it may be a bit cheap). But the name killed me. If this was the Spelleating Bardiche, I'd have voted for it more. Pun names, joke themes and boring-but-good items make up the mess of 40-100,000,000,000 of RPG Superstar...

I know Jeff can write, I've seen his work, I just think this one got away from him.

It wasn't meant as a pun, honestly. I'd originally settled on "dweomervore" until a nagging feeling made me do a search and I realized it was the name of a monster in Forgotten Realms. So I switched "dweomer" to "arcana." Seriously was not trying to be punny.

Also, Mark's comment about adventurers breaking their own stuff to gain more power for the item...that totally came at me from left field. Never would have occurred to me. That's some serious munchkin power-gamer stuff.

Hard to tell, since it's not likely the original piece of music. All the rest of the themes on that album are crappy, synthesized reproductions of the original film scores. Given the rest of the album, you're looking for a sci-fi movie that likely came out in the late 70s to mid 80s.

Okay, I think I'm ready.

Arcanavore
Aura strong abjuration and universal; CL 15th
Slot none; Price 73,313 gp; Weight 14 lbs.

Description
This +1 keen adamantine bardiche is carved with intricate runes on both blade and haft, and instilled with a hunger for magic. On a successful attack, make a targeted dispel check (1d20+15) if the target has one or more spell effects on it. If successful, the highest level spell in effect is dispelled from the target, and the weapon absorbs the magical energy, gaining an additional +1 enhancement bonus for each level of the spell, lasting a total number of rounds equal to the enhancement bonus gained. (For example, if the arcanavore successfully dispels haste, it gains an additional +3 enhancement bonus for the next 3 rounds.) Once the arcanavore absorbs enough energy to gain a +5 enhancement bonus, additional energy may be used to grant the following special abilities to the weapon, assuming the weapon has absorbed enough energy to meet the base price of the special ability: defiant, glorious, limning, and nullifying. These last a number of rounds equal to their base price modifier. The weapon's total bonus cannot exceed +10.

The arcanavore can also absorb energy from sundering magic items, which provide longer lasting bonuses. If it deals sufficient damage to an item to inflict the broken condition, it gains +1 enhancement bonus for every three Caster Levels of the item (or special abilities as above, minimum bonus of +1) that last 1 minute per caster level of the item. If a sunder attack destroys the item, then the duration is doubled.

The arcanavore only sheds light while using absorbed magic.

Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, dispel magic, keen edge, limited wish, creator must be a caster of at least 15th level; Cost 38,313 gp

I have to admit, with the amount of swarm-themed/related items the last few years, I thought I'd become a bit jaded where they were concerned. However, your swarm-strike caster not only captured my interest, but it made it onto my personal Top 32. Glad to see the judges agree.

Congratulations, and good luck in the next round!

After making your farewells and exiting the western gate, you make your way along a muddy but well-marked road, trailing west by southwest. The road becomes more solid but difficult as it climbs over the hills, taking you higher until you can look back and see the entirety of the little valley that cradles the gnomish village. Before long, you're surrounded by lofty pines that shade you from a surprisingly bright spring sun.

Eventually, you can see the entrance to the pass ahead, rising up between the slopes of two mountains. Even at this distance, you can make out the ramparts of the dwarven fortress that completely blocks the pass, protecting the Marches from what lies outside. About another two hours of travel will put you right outside its gates, should you choose to do so.

I like this armor, and it got several votes from me during voting.

My main concern was that it provides a major transformation without much detail about it. The character turns into water and can't speak, attack, or cast spells. Okay, so what does that mean in regards to others attacking the wearer? Does the wearer still take damage normally? What about precision damage? Fire effects? It's a major change that seems like it should have noticeable effects beyond what's listed.

Congratulations, and good luck in the coming round.

Well done! This item made my personal Top 32, but I didn't realize it was going to go over so well with the voters. If I had, it would have been in my Detect Mojo Top 20. Congratulations, and good luck!

To clarify my previous post: At no time did I take not being in the top 32 as a personal affront. Nor did I ever think I was a true shoe-in. Yes, I was confident. Yes, I got my hopes up. Yes, I wanted that prize. So yes, I'm a little dejected. That's only natural, right? But ultimately, there are zero sour grapes, and I'm genuinely happy for those whom made top 32.

You get emotionally invested in the contest. It's normal to feel dejection if you don't make that first hurdle. I spent a little time yesterday feeling like this until I worked it out of my system.

A lot more of the items I liked are in the Top 32 this year. I'm looking forward to seeing what the authors bring to the contest in later rounds.

Ah, okay. I sent mine to Chris, so it might have been Nick.

I am the first timer alternate, yeah.

Time to have a massive anxiety attack.

No time for an anxiety attack. As a former alternate, I know how you feel, but you're on a time crunch. You're one bad case of the flu away from the Top 32. Get your map finished and turned in. :)

Congratulations, Top 32! Now buckle up, because you're in for a heck of a ride.

Shadowborn wrote:

Hama wrote:

I just had, HAD to share this :D it made me laugh so much

Pretty funny. Brings up the whole timeline weirdness though.

The fact that they had Stark's dad in WWII with Cap still boggles my mind. Assuming Tony Stark is around 40ish, and his dad was around 30 during WWII, in order for the numbers to be right his dad would have waited until around 60 or so to father a child. Stark's lucky to have any memories of his father at all.

Not exactly true. My Father was born in 1913 and I was born in 1965. He remained healthy and active until a series of mini strokes slowly debilitated him. He died in 1995 and I still have many memories of my childhood with him.

Which is great, but if he partied like Stark does, then probably an exception to the rule.

Mark Hoover wrote:

Unless there's a time loop in there somewhere. What if Tony's his own father?

Possibly even his own mother, via opposite-sex cloning shenanigans. The only person he's ever really loved (or respected, or considered an equal) is himself, after all. :)

Ew. Now you've gone and reminded me of a terrible episode of the Outer Limits. Guy has sex change and goes back in time to seduce himself. Add Tony and all his freaky gadgets to the story...

I just had, HAD to share this :D it made me laugh so much

Pretty funny. Brings up the whole timeline weirdness though.

The fact that they had Stark's dad in WWII with Cap still boggles my mind. Assuming Tony Stark is around 40ish, and his dad was around 30 during WWII, in order for the numbers to be right his dad would have waited until around 60 or so to father a child. Stark's lucky to have any memories of his father at all.

For an actual mount or animal companion, yes. For a horse-like construct via phantom steed, I'm not so sure it's necessary.

Movement During a Charge: You must move before your attack, not after. You must move at least 10 feet (2 squares) and may move up to double your speed directly toward the designated opponent. If you move a distance equal to your speed or less, you can also draw a weapon during a charge attack if your base attack bonus is at least +1.

You must have a clear path toward the opponent, and nothing can hinder your movement (such as difficult terrain or obstacles). You must move to the closest space from which you can attack the opponent. If this space is occupied or otherwise blocked, you can't charge. If any line from your starting space to the ending space passes through a square that blocks movement, slows movement, or contains a creature (even an ally), you can't charge. Helpless creatures don't stop a charge.

If you don't have line of sight to the opponent at the start of your turn, you can't charge that opponent.

You can't take a 5-foot step in the same round as a charge.

The subject can tread on air as if walking on solid ground. Moving upward is similar to walking up a hill. The maximum upward or downward angle possible is 45 degrees, at a rate equal to half the air walker's normal speed.

A strong wind (21+ miles per hour) can push the subject along or hold it back. At the end of a creature's turn each round, the wind blows the air walker 5 feet for each 5 miles per hour of wind speed. The creature may be subject to additional penalties in exceptionally strong or turbulent winds, such as loss of control over movement or physical damage from being buffeted about.

Should the spell duration expire while the subject is still aloft, the magic fails slowly. The subject floats downward 60 feet per round for 1d6 rounds. If it reaches the ground in that amount of time, it lands safely. If not, it falls the rest of the distance, taking 1d6 points of damage per 10 feet of fall. Since dispelling a spell effectively ends it, the subject also descends in this way if the air walk spell is dispelled, but not if it is negated by an antimagic field.

Nothing in the description of movement during a charge says it doesn't work with air walk.

Nothing in the description of air walk says you can't charge.

Conclusion: A creature under the effects of air walk can charge normally.

6. Day 1: "I don't detect any traps. I'm gonna check again, just in case I was wrong." "You sure? You said there weren't any." "Yeah, but, you know...um...nevermind, I'm just checking again."

Day 2: "I don't detect any traps." "Gonna check again?" "Nope. I know there aren't any." "How?" "Um...nevermind that."

6a. "I don't detect any traps." (To the fighter) "Go ahead and open the door." *takes a step back*

TLDR: See what others like, read to improve craft, and keep trying.

Quoted for emphasis.

I think that smoking is not allowed in sindication any more.

There's been smoking on the show, just not as prolifically as you'd expect. But yes, the anti-smoking lobby keeps it off TV most times, though they make exceptions for some shows, like Constantine. Smoking is part of his character.

Aspergilligans?