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Spectre

Celestial Follower's page

632 posts. Alias of Mike Welham (Contributor, RPG Superstar 2012).


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Thanks, boss! I like it when my hard work gets recognized.


axomiatic? I was drunk when I posted that?

Yay!

You're my favorite turnip, Axomi.


<Brandishing axomiatic turnip>

Out damned slaad! Out, I say!


2 people marked this as a favorite.

*sigh*

I'll prepare a batch of methadone cookies for the inevitable, boss.


Yay! My fourteenth favorite!


I just saw a triple rainbow.


Has anyone seen my recipe folder? I wanted to make a nice rutaturradden.


The turnips are in the attic!


Pickle juice is pretty good.

By the way, I only use turnips in cider.


Did you know that a lion's roar can be heard from five miles away?

Weird...I don't usually dispense useless facts, unless it's about turnips.


Buttered, but it has to be real butter.


Is a number 2 pencil best for one's nose?


Here you can lend anything you want. Even plants. If you eat it, though, that makes it a little more difficult to return it, at least in its original form.


I'm special! Like a unique turnip flower.


3 people marked this as a favorite.

Balor? I hardly know her!


1 person marked this as a favorite.

Oooooooh, sparkly!


<Throws root vegetable donuts in pot>

There we go!

Oops...where'd those cigarette butts come from?


1 person marked this as a favorite.

<Covered in powdered sugar and sprinkles>

Some kid "banished" me to the Donut Field! It took me forever to get *burp* out.

Don't worry, though, I brought back plenty of turnip and rutabaga donuts for everyone!


Oh, I meant buggin'.

I was undone by Infernal Autocorrect.


And then I'll pull out the five pound turnip I've been saving just for the occasion.


2 people marked this as a favorite.

I've been practicing my sure fire sexy come on too:

Hey baby, ya wanna see how bug my turnip is?


Boss, if you get into the pop music racket, I'll be a roadie.


Celestial Healer wrote:
I am feeling quite a bit better than I was a few days ago. If this continues, it will be a short cold I had to deal with.

I knew those turnip poultices would help, boss.


1 person marked this as a favorite.
Celestial Healer wrote:
Celestial Thaumoctopus wrote:
{casts Heal on CH using turnip as material component}

*starts blowing turnips out of his nose*

I can use these...


The pay and benefits aren't that great, boss.


The only hound archon I remember had a "druid" friend. I just remember that they giggled and ate a lot.


Huh. Celestial Emeril Bourdain did look suspiciously like a golden retriever.

Air Bam!


I'll have you know I just got finished with a boot camp put on by Celestial Emeril Bourdain.

Bam!


Doot doot doo doo doot.


Badgers frighten me. Plus they're mean.


Celestial Healer wrote:
Honestly, that can't be any worse than the system Celestial Follower uses. Lawful my ass.

Files should be free, man. Er, boss.


I don't think you want to do that. Even the slaads find Charnie to be inedible.


No one likes it when I put a turnip in their margarita.


Thanks, MN! That's going in my next recipe.


I blame the teevee.


The last time I tried to use eggs, they talked to me.


from the floor

You should expect nothing else from the Celestial realms.


Will do!

<Finds celestial hammock and rests in it>


3 people marked this as a favorite.

Oooh, nuts! Those will go great in my turnip-tofu soufflé.


<Casts make whole>

Done!


The sulfuric acid gives it that extra kick!


Darn it! You didn't open the window, and now I've got to clean it up!

<Looks over at Shanky>

How would you like to be a celestial minion?


1 person marked this as a favorite.

I was hoping the answer would have been "a ride in my beautiful automobile."


Well, yeah, of course! What do you take me for?


I made turducken in celebration of the new cable!


It's really more like Mos Def.


1 person marked this as a favorite.

¡HURRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

Oh, hey, are they finally going to resolve that storyline where Donna is actually sleeping with The Black Goat of the Wood's good identical twin?


That's the ticket! Thanks boss!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to vomit.


<Picks up the remote>

I don't know how to work this thing! Which tentacle do I press to change channels?


Nah, I'm good boss. Maybe a holy syllable or even a holy letter will do.

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