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4: be prepared to back up your words.
"Gah, you got yourself cut up again?!?"
<casts healing magic>
"Why do I adventure with you clumsy dolts again?"
<Casts buffing spell>
"Now get back in there and stop getting stabbed!"
5: Han Solo, Indiana Jones, and Ozymandias are your role models. Learn from them, emulate them.
6: If it turns out your party hates your PC, be prepared to switch track.
1a: Make sure everyone at the table is aware that you are playing a jerk with a heart of gold.
7: Play a jerk but don't be one.
8: Play (as a character) as if you were reluctant to do the "right things", be (as a player) eager to do the "right things".
9 -- When playing as "superior" to those around you -- don't take all the loot, pass on it because, "I'm better that that stuff -- you all may have it."
10 -- Keep the other players laughing. A jerk with a heart of gold is much more forgivable if everyone is laughing.
11: Be aware of your fellow player's reactions and adjust play in consequence.
12. Have one positive trait that the character will not bend on -- ever. Be it loyalty (a good one) generosity, mercy, whatever have it and do not bend on it. People wait for a jerk to descend into complete selfishness -- having that one trait shows them that he's 'redeemable' and not going to make that fall. He's at the point he refuses to go pass, which helps build trust in him.
12. Have one positive trait that the character will not bend on -- ever. Be it loyalty (a good one) generosity, mercy, whatever have it and do not bend on it. People wait for a jerk to descend into complete selfishness -- having that one trait shows them that he's 'redeemable' and not going to make that fall. He's at the point he refuses to go pass, which helps build trust in him.
I have a rogue that is like that. A half-orc rogue. He b+~~+es (mildly) about giving to charity, helping the weak, and generally about the "goody-two-shoes" in the party; but he keeps a colony of cats in his flop (and he's named each and every one) and secretly passes along gold to an orphanage because he's knows what it's like to be a cast-off from society. The cleric knows about his pets, but Brox swore him to absolute double-Top-Secret secrecy about it. Many intimidate rolls were made when the cleric happened to stop by to get Brox for their next adventure....
Note: Very important that you allow one character to know in-game that you're a jerk with a heart of gold. That way you have someone that can chime in on your behalf to the other characters.