I love simple motivations that result in excellent behavior.
Meatball's simple little brain makes me happy:
(1) "Cranky older cat gets better food than we do."
(2) "If I upset cranky older cat, I get moved out."
(3) "If I am nice to cranky older cat, I get noms."
He may try to beat up on the other cats, but he is sooooooo nice to Nefret it's ridiculous. He gets close to her until she growls a bit. Then he lies down, chirrups, purrs, and gazes at her lovingly. For hours. Because food is involved.
I honestly wouldn't be surprised if this winter when it gets colder he manages to get up and lie against her. He's that determined to cozy up to her so he can get her food.
Last night was a fantastic example of why it behooves you as a GM to avoid die rolling if at all possible.
We set an ambush for an assassin. The assassin, a dwarf with a limp, spotted us and ran. Our 7' tall warrior and elven warlock specializing in shadow movement took off in pursuit. The game system requires die rolls every round to determine your movement. And so yes, our best, most-athletic, tallest PCs were outrun by a lame dwarf.
It was not a good feeling, especially for the first "combat" encounter of the session.
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It was not a good feeling, especially for the first "combat" encounter of the session.
I think thats a problem with the d20 system specifically rather than dice in general. Vampire's d10 system or champions? 3d6 would make that unlikely enough to be believable, rather than par for the course. Its way, way too swingy. Especially at lower levels or for stat checks where +/- 3 is barely a blip on the d20. Its always POSSIBLE to trip and faceplant or something.
Being a dwarven assassin, he probably had a tunnel or sewer nearby to escape into. thus quickly evading the tall people?
or a dwarven bar."dammit. they all look exactly the same.."
It was not a good feeling, especially for the first "combat" encounter of the session.
I think thats a problem with the d20 system specifically rather than dice in general. Vampire's d10 system or champions? 3d6 would make that unlikely enough to be believable, rather than par for the course. Its way, way too swingy. Especially at lower levels or for stat checks where +/- 3 is barely a blip on the d20. Its always POSSIBLE to trip and faceplant or something.
Being a dwarven assassin, he probably had a tunnel or sewer nearby to escape into. thus quickly evading the tall people?
or a dwarven bar."dammit. they all look exactly the same.."
That would have been far more satisfying. Instead it was just, "He out-and-out outruns you in the open, and you watch his form fade away in the distance because you can't keep up."
This isn't a d20 system, it's Storyline, where you roll a number of d10 based on your skills in that area. But because no one bothered to put points into "run fast" and there are no racial differentiators nor movement speed, it was all about who could roll more successes on 2d10. And since he had a limp he needed 9s, and his pursuers needed 8s, but he outrolled them and it was embarrassing.
EDIT: And that's kind of my point: The GM could have come up with a reason for the bad rolls, but instead it was like watching a trained martial artist chasing down a little person with a limp and somehow losing the race with no extenuating circumstances. According to the narrative, they didn't trip, they didn't twist an ankle, they didn't get out of breath, they just out-and-out lost a fair footrace. It made no sense. And as a GM, you have to avoid that kind of thing. 'Cause dice do it all the time, and sometimes you need to overrule them or explain them.
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OK, I'm ornery.
On Monday I got a suspicious email from Microsoft telling me my corporate OneDrive account had expired, I reported it as Phishing, and I got a gold star from security; they'd sent the email to test employees.
On Tuesday I got an email saying that I'd be receiving a notification about the annual employee survey soon.
On Wednesday I received another suspicious email from Microsoft telling me that all I needed to do to complete the employee survey was to click the link (to a Microsoft domain, not a Global Megacorporation domain) and put in my Global Megacorporation login credentials.
I immediately reported it as phishing.
...I misread this as "I'm horny".
....
I have GOT to get new glasses.
Last night was a fantastic example of why it behooves you as a GM to avoid die rolling if at all possible.
We set an ambush for an assassin. The assassin, a dwarf with a limp, spotted us and ran. Our 7' tall warrior and elven warlock specializing in shadow movement took off in pursuit. The game system requires die rolls every round to determine your movement. And so yes, our best, most-athletic, tallest PCs were outrun by a lame dwarf.
It was not a good feeling, especially for the first "combat" encounter of the session.
I can think of two players who would have had a very real problem with this, and one of them would have gotten loud about it.
I am very much in favor of rolling BECAUSE of situations like this- the party shouldn't be able to simply win because of how their characters are. Sometimes someone just gets the upper hand. But the party should have skills that allow them to persevere over a few lucky rolls on the DMs part.
I like deer.
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It gets even worse. Apparently the probability-impaired GM set up the situation with numbers he thought sounded "reasonable".
Shiro, being skeptical, sat down and worked out the probabilities this morning. According to the required setup and rolls, they had less than a 1 in 100,000 chance of actually catching the dwarf.
So my observations in our "new" GM's style (he's new to me, not the others):
(1) We set an ambush for the assassin, which wasn't what he wanted, so he had an NPC warn the assassin that we were in the ambush site, how many of us there were, and what we looked like.
(2) He let the assassin be seen by us anyway, just so we wouldn't spend all night sitting around waiting. So of course we gave chase.
(3) Not having chase rules ready, he set them up on the fly, but messed that up so badly it was nigh-impossible for the party to catch the assassin.
(4) Watching the fiasco unfold, he made no attempt to explain why a lame dwarf was outdistancing our best runners.
I compared it to Shiro's campaign when the two fighters couldn't pull a steel door open and then my tiny fairy ripped it off its hinges with a natural 20. "Those of you looking at the back side of the door see that the hinges were obviously already damaged, like the first two almost got it done and she just lifted the already-broken door. Do you tell her?"
And of course they didn't, and it was a very similar result (a fairy out-lifting a half-orc), but the GM gave a plausible explanation for it mid-stream.
And in the, "The true monsters are the humans" department...
I heard a horrific cat scream about 40 minutes ago. Literally, an, "A coyote's got me and I've lost the fight and I'm dying"-type scream. I ran out to check on our cats and they were all safely in the studio. I threw on my shoes and headed around the block to see whether I could find the poor thing.
And there he was, a little tabby youngling maybe 9-10 months old, in the front yard with his owner. He was wearing his brand-new electric fence collar, and his owner was watching over him as he was testing its boundaries.
Anything that makes a cat scream like that is NOT OK. Full stop. Find a better way. We use steel cable. It works, and our cats have never so much as yelped.
Sooooo displeased...
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I'm disturbed that someone would think an shock collar for cats (or anything, for that matter) is a good idea at all, let alone buy one, fit it, then casually stand there watching something get electrocuted.
If you don’t have a yard with a fence that will contain your pets, don’t have pets.
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And in the, "The true monsters are the humans" department...
I heard a horrific cat scream about 40 minutes ago. Literally, an, "A coyote's got me and I've lost the fight and I'm dying"-type scream. I ran out to check on our cats and they were all safely in the studio. I threw on my shoes and headed around the block to see whether I could find the poor thing.
And there he was, a little tabby youngling maybe 9-10 months old, in the front yard with his owner. He was wearing his brand-new electric fence collar, and his owner was watching over him as he was testing its boundaries.
Anything that makes a cat scream like that is NOT OK. Full stop. Find a better way. We use steel cable. It works, and our cats have never so much as yelped.
Sooooo displeased...
NH, I would be likely dead at the hands of the police if I saw that.
Speaking of hating the government...
Impus Minor got a fix-it ticket for the Celica for a non-working tail light. I fixed it, drove over to the police department, and got it signed off. I tried to clear it, it wasn't in the system, and they said, "Try mid-September."
So, I still haven't received a notification in the mail, so I tried to pay online. $192?!?!?! Everywhere I've checked the price of a fix-it ticket is $25. So I called the traffic division. "Oh, no, it's only $25, but you have to provide proof of repair and the online portal won't do that, so it charges the full fine.
In other words, they set a court date, they don't bill you, they don't tell you what it costs, and if you try to pay online they charge to $192 for a $25 ticket.
If a private company were doing this I could turn them in for fraud. Since it's the gub'ment, it's just another tax on the uneducated.
Hate. It. So. Much.
Lenore is so sweet-natured and well-behaved that we've stopped putting her harness on when we open the back door for her. She usually just happily trots over to the studio and waits patiently for me to let her in.
This morning there was a squirrel in the yard.
Watching her massiveness slowly trot towards the squirrel while it waited for the (nonexistent) line to stop her was side-splitting. It's sitting there, it's sitting there, it's sitting there... and you could see the sudden terror in its entire body when it realized there was nothing stopping her. But yeah, she is a BEEEG, SLOOOW kibbeh, so he managed to get away. Then she trotted happily back to the studio door.
Dumb-a$$ squirrel came back down while I was hooking up Morrigan. It is only alive at this point because I *do* harness Morrigan before she goes out. But it was d**ned close.
EDIT: In case I haven't mentioned it, our cats get to go outdoors in harnesses with leads attached to a clothesline, and I adjust the length of the lead based on how well-behaved they are. So they can explore most of the yard, but not go up trees or over fences. Nefret's lead is so long she COULD go to neighbor's houses or rooftops, but she's 18. She doesn't. Lenore's is almost as long. Morrigan and Mephisto get maybe 8' each, because hellions.
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The dog runs out barking at the woodchuck.
The woodchuck galomps off
The dog goes nuts spinning in circles and attacking the ground where the woodchuck was when the dog started heading towards them....
Does not understand things move....
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(1) We set an ambush for the assassin, which wasn't what he wanted, so he had an NPC warn the assassin that we were in the ambush site, how many of us there were, and what we looked like.
RED FLAG
(1) We set an ambush for the assassin, which wasn't what he wanted, so he had an NPC warn the assassin that we were in the ambush site, how many of us there were, and what we looked like.RED FLAG
Are you kidding? My *entire* character concept is a shapeshifter who's hiding his identity from the rest of the party with the idea that they'll eventually find out. 20+ of his 30 build points are in shapeshifting abilities. Without shapeshifting, he's completely useless.
And after 3 sessions, it's become clear that in the GM's narrative, the other PCs never learn my identity, so I'm going to spend an entire campaign as a nerdy annoying translator.
Whee?
EDIT: When we set up the campaign, we talked about wanting some kind of Babylon 5-like campaign. Shiro was the first to notice that our first mission is basically the pilot episode. And we deviated from the plot of the pilot, and the GM forced us back onto it.
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The dog runs out barking at the woodchuck.
The woodchuck galomps off
The dog goes nuts spinning in circles and attacking the ground where the woodchuck was when the dog started heading towards them....
Does not understand things move....
Um... my 5-pound kitten knows exactly where the squirrels and crows are at all times. If only I'd unclip her lead she'd kill them all... and maybe someday 10 years from now come home to us...
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I'm beginning to think that Morrigan talks a big game but just might not be the hunter I think she is.
Every day, we open the back door and let the cats into the yard (except Lenore, who is the first, "No thanks, I'd rather be inside with you," cat I've ever owned). This lets flies, aka "sky raisins", into the house. Both Mephisto and Morrigan believe that this is the Best. Thing. Ever.
Once they're back inside and their harnesses are off, the raisin chase begins.
For Mephisto it's not so much "chase" as "i saw one". His killing efficiency is the stuff you rarely ever see outside of particularly dumb cats. Their brainpower has been entirely switched from "think" to "kill". He sees a sky raisin. It doesn't matter what it believes it was doing. Flying. Crawling. trying to get elevation. It simply dies. Instantly. And he eats it and searches for the next sky raisin.
For Morrigan it may be that the chase is the thing, but the entire house becomes a vertical parkour course for her. She runs up walls, screens, across windows, through tiny gaps, happily clicking and chasing her raisins. She rarely, if ever, gets a kill. She's much happier for it, and it may well be that she's smart enough to know that sky raisins are finite and Mephisto's a little engine of their destruction.
But after watching the two of them, pitting a squirrel against the incredibly-fast, 5-pound "I can climb any surface you can, and possibly faster" Morrigan or the, "I'm 10 pounds of solid muscle and if I touch you you die," Mephisto, I'm thinking Mephisto is the bigger threat. He doesn't look like much, but holy carp he's so dense he'd sink in mercury and once he decides something needs to die it dies.
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I swear, intelligence notwithstanding, Mephisto is such a Freehold.
EVERY morning I hook up the kittens and let them out.
EVERY morning:
Lenore: Oh, no thank you! I just wanted to go to the studio.
Morrigan: OK. Sniffing done! Let me in to be with my giant adopted sister, please!
Mephisto: Where did all the girls go? Why am I alone? Help! Help! I need to be where all the girls are!
Oh, yeah! That's where everyone goes!
Every. Morning.
EDIT: Yes, I just find it hilarious that he will happily hang out on the lawn for 7-8 hours... as long as one of the girls is there as well. As soon as all the girls are gone, he wants to be wherever they are.
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There is a def-con scale based on how far the dog follows me into the bathroom
def-con 5: At the door. Just following you around as usual
def-con 4: Just inside the door. Hey is the walk or food happening soon?
def-con 3: Halfway in the bathroom. Hey, out of water.
def-con 2: on my left side: You're taking me out for a walk. NOW! Or food has been left on the counter and is not falling into my mouth.
def-con 1: between legs: What part of NOW didn't you understand biped?!?!?
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Has anyone heard from or seen the Polish dragon lately? I haven't gotten a PM reply from him in days.
Regardless, I hope y'all are well. Just leaving this where I knew the most people who know him. Apologies for the intrusion.
Seems to be around on Ye Mightye Tome of Zuccs. Probably in his lab, creating more Monstrosities.
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Has anyone heard from or seen the Polish dragon lately? I haven't gotten a PM reply from him in days.
Regardless, I hope y'all are well. Just leaving this where I knew the most people who know him. Apologies for the intrusion.
Seems to be around on Ye Mightye Tome of Zuccs.Probably in his lab, creating more Monstrosities.
I wish.
I am busy working because of the recent events, translating article after article about <waves hand around pointing to low flying drones>
Y'know, when Judge Dredd did it it was new and fresh, but these days whenever a mysterious magical person offers you "a cure for mortality's ails", you know it's death.
Has anyone heard from or seen the Polish dragon lately? I haven't gotten a PM reply from him in days.
Regardless, I hope y'all are well. Just leaving this where I knew the most people who know him. Apologies for the intrusion.
Seems to be around on Ye Mightye Tome of Zuccs.Probably in his lab, creating more Monstrosities.I wish.
I am busy working because of the recent events, translating article after article about <waves hand around pointing to low flying drones>
Stay safe. Good luck to you.
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For the record, I am far from the routes of those drones, and in different direction — if they came into my neighborhood it could mean actual war, as it would be an attack on a major city.
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Fantasy Monster: Big Bell Beetle
A beetle that rings when struck. And it is big. And the ringing is loud.
Fantasy Monster: Big Bell Beetle
A beetle that rings when struck. And it is big. And the ringing is loud.
STEALING this for my Redwall game!
Couldn't you "accidentally" shapeshift in front of them? Maybe drop hints to the others about how your ear looks a little weird today, or your eyes are a slightly different color? Something to try and get the GM to do a reveal. Or have you decided that it isn't worth it because the GM would ignore it since it doesn't fit their story?(1) We set an ambush for the assassin, which wasn't what he wanted, so he had an NPC warn the assassin that we were in the ambush site, how many of us there were, and what we looked like.RED FLAGAre you kidding? My *entire* character concept is a shapeshifter who's hiding his identity from the rest of the party with the idea that they'll eventually find out. 20+ of his 30 build points are in shapeshifting abilities. Without shapeshifting, he's completely useless.
And after 3 sessions, it's become clear that in the GM's narrative, the other PCs never learn my identity, so I'm going to spend an entire campaign as a nerdy annoying translator.
Whee?
EDIT: When we set up the campaign, we talked about wanting some kind of Babylon 5-like campaign. Shiro was the first to notice that our first mission is basically the pilot episode. And we deviated from the plot of the pilot, and the GM forced us back onto it.
Oh, I *could* do something, but so far I'm enjoying watching the train wreck... or having pleasant naps during the sessions (they caught me snoring).
Shiro brought up the chase with the GM, and pointed out that according to the chase rules kids couldn't play tag because it would be physically impossible for one child to catch another. The GM's worrying response? "That's how tag was when I was a kid. Someone would tag me and I could never catch anyone."
So it really is like watching a slow-motion train wreck. And since the campaign just started I have no particular investment in it, so it's kind of fun seeing just how incapable we're going to be of doing anything at all, and what the GM is going to do when none of the PCs can succeed at any actions. I'm guessing super NPCs to the rescue, at which point we as players will just be watching the GM play with himself, but you have to admit, this is so bad so far it's kind of entertaining.
It reminds me of our first 5e campaign where the GM made us roll every time we were going to do anything, so my high-charisma cleric with decades of experience in high society went around horrifically insulting every noble she met. (He seriously made me roll Diplomacy to say, "Hello," and to start the campaign I had six rolls in a row of 6 of less, so apparently I was very grating.) we eventually talked to that GM about how stupid his system was. Shiro's talked to this GM once. If we continue to be unable to do anything we'll talk to him again. We're adults. We can talk to him. It's just sometimes more fun to watch GMs blow themselves up so that they (may) learn something.
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Yeah I think this is just a personality difference between us, I don't enjoy watching those kind of trainwrecks even from a distance, much less as a participant. So my position would be either get it fixed so it plays properly, or bail. Life's too short to waste on entertainment that's not fun.
Yeah I think this is just a personality difference between us, I don't enjoy watching those kind of trainwrecks even from a distance, much less as a participant. So my position would be either get it fixed so it plays properly, or bail. Life's too short to waste on entertainment that's not fun.
Yeah. "Your highly-trained PCs, who spent a lifetime honing their individual skills, can't do anything that I couldn't do on the playground when I was a kid," is ludicrously toxic. It needs to get fixed or the campaign won't go anywhere. But since the campaign hasn't started yet I am definitely of the attitude, "This is so amazingly bad I am being entertained."
Definitely not for everyone.
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Kitten Weight Races:
Lenore continues to grow at 2% per week. I am concerned for the world cat food supply.
Mephisto Z. Meatball just broke 9 pounds. I am concerned for every breakable object in our house.
Morrigan just broke 6 pounds. Her ginormous weight has not slowed her down one whit.
If someone is going to talk to the GM about it, as it seems may happen, I would stick around for a couple more sessions. But if it get better, I'm out. I've had enough s@&%-show games, thank you. I'd rather not game than be in another one.
Shiro already talked to the GM once. If Wednesday goes as poorly we'll all talk to the GM. If next Wednesday goes as badly the campaign will be abandoned. So there's a "plan".
Kitten Weight Races:
Lenore continues to grow at 2% per week. I am concerned for the world cat food supply.Mephisto Z. Meatball just broke 9 pounds. I am concerned for every breakable object in our house.
Morrigan just broke 6 pounds. Her ginormous weight has not slowed her down one whit.
*kitty flex*
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Semi-political thought for the day: Ever since John Oliver released all his old shows on YouTube, we've been watching them every lunch hour. We're up to Season 7 and COVID just hit.
And I'm thinking, "Ah, those were the good old days!"
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Today's (following last Monday's) Legend Of Five Rings session ended in two monks crucified for spreading unrest among the local peasants.
Apparently, they were tricked by either neighborhood Lions pretending to be Scorpions, or by Scorpions pretending to be neighborhood Lions, pretending to be Scorpions...
There are hints that at least a Scorpion shugenja was was involved.
Still no Spiders around to blame.
The wife and I went to see Led Bib.
A good gig, in horrible weather. Just as well that it was only a short walk away.
Today's (following last Monday's) Legend Of Five Rings session ended in two monks crucified for spreading unrest among the local peasants.
Apparently, they were tricked by either neighborhood Lions pretending to be Scorpions, or by Scorpions pretending to be neighborhood Lions, pretending to be Scorpions...
There are hints that at least a Scorpion shugenja was was involved.
Still no Spiders around to blame.
COOOOL
I need to work on my NCJF.
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I swear, intelligence notwithstanding, Mephisto is such a Freehold.
EVERY morning I hook up the kittens and let them out.
EVERY morning:
Lenore: Oh, no thank you! I just wanted to go to the studio.
Morrigan: OK. Sniffing done! Let me in to be with my giant adopted sister, please!
Mephisto: Where did all the girls go? Why am I alone? Help! Help! I need to be where all the girls are!
Oh, yeah! That's where everyone goes!Every. Morning.
EDIT: Yes, I just find it hilarious that he will happily hang out on the lawn for 7-8 hours... as long as one of the girls is there as well. As soon as all the girls are gone, he wants to be wherever they are.
Now THAT'S my kinda of pu- uh, kitty....
Kitten Weight Races:
Mephisto Z. Meatball just broke 9 pounds. I am concerned for every breakable object in our house.
YEAH!!!!
The human brain is a fascinating thing. I'm helping a younger friend (a woman in her early 30s) deal with some life issues that I won't go into 'cause privacy.
But what makes it really hard is how intensely she feels her emotions. Most (many?) people have that intensity as teenagers and then grow out of it; I like to point to Romeo and Juliet as the acid test: If it doesn't move you to tears when you're 16, you should worry about your emotional health. If you don't roll your eyes and groan, "What a pair of melodramatic idiots!" when you're 46, you should worry about your emotional health. As you get older, you're supposed to stop treating emotional travails as black-and-white, he-loves-me/he-hates-me, "I need to crawl into a corner and die"/"I'm on top of the world" events.
And yet some people come to emotional "maturity" (the ability to weather emotional storms without being overwhelmed) and others don't. And I'd love to know the difference.
As it is, I have to listen, I have to get into her head and see where she is and what she's feeling, and try to find a path for her. And with emotions that intense, it's hard. And saying, "Calm down and don't be so intense," is worse than useless; it's insulting and condescending. And so I try...
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Tech-Bros:
Chrome unasked for search AI:
.
What the hell am I playing right now, then?!
I literally fought (though not defeated) it in Silksong.
Now you are just trying to gaslight me...
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Tech-Bros:
Global Megacorporation asked how AI was helping us in our day-to-day jobs. I could honestly answer, "It isn't."
And I gave an example (which I think I posted here previously):
(1) Start a performance review of a peer.
(2) Question #1: In what capacity are you evaluating this person?
NobodysHome's answer: I attended their course on bnarging the foo. I will be evaluating them based on their course design, technical content, and presentation skills.
AI's "fix" of NobodysHome's answer: This person was easily one of the best course designers I've ever seen! The design was perfect and the course flowed smoothly. Every aspect was technically correct, and provided the in-depth details the students needed to fully understand the concept. I have rarely seen a better presenter.
So using the AI actually cost me time and sanity because I had to read and then delete that drivel.
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This will be near and dear to gran's heart: If you have a corporate policy, don't ignore it willy-nilly "because it'll make the customers unhappy". If you're that worried about it, don't post the policy in the first place.
Today's rant brought to you by, "If you're a no-show to your appointment you have to pay anyway," policies. A friend's a gig worker -- if she doesn't work, she doesn't get paid. The company she contracts for has a, "No show, pay anyway" policy. They don't enforce it. Meaning that when people flake, she doesn't get paid.
Even worse, they have a policy of, "If you're more than 20 minutes late, it doesn't count as a session." So she has a client who consistently shows up 21 minutes late. It's not a "session" because he's more than 20 minutes late, but her supervisor makes her see him anyway "to keep the customers happy". But then they don't charge him for the no-show "to keep the customers happy".
The net result is that she's doing work for this schmuck for free because he learned to game the system. After three free sessions in a row, she finally threatened to walk. And at that point the supervisor was like, "Oh, I guess we should enforce our rules."
Nope. If you post the rules, you enforce them. Period. I missed a hair appointment because I tested positive for COVID day of. I still paid him because it was his policy. And I didn't get angry because I'm a decent person. And if your customer DOES get angry, you don't want them as a customer anyway...
========
I'm reminded of my old boss' "NobodysHome Test": If a customer was rude to me or got angry with me, he threw them out, told them never to return, and told them to tell all their friends because he didn't want their business either. And at a time when BlockBuster was crushing all local video stores, he stayed in business. Why? A loyal customer base. Why? Because he didn't take any s**t from whiny entitled pr**ks and they loved watching them get thrown out. The scariest part? 20 years later the Fake Russian came up with the exact same test for whether or not people were worth talking to.
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Pet peeve: Writers who can't English.
When I saw the billboard for Anaconda: It swallows it's victims whole and there wasn't even a peep of public outcry, I should have known that the world was doomed.
I work in a professional writing group. We are supposed to spell-check and grammar-check everything we do. In tech, "setup" is the noun and "set up" is the verb. For the last year I've been correcting all my colleagues, all to no avail. Today I opened up the latest round of slides for my review. Slide 2: "How can I setup this application?"
We. Are. Supposed. To. Be. Professionals.
If my plumber puts, "The water heater burst it's tank," I don't complain. English isn't their job.
If the person writing the documentation for the water heater writes, "What to do if the water heater bursts it's tank," I get incensed, because knowing proper English is supposedly their job.
Grr...