Last one to post wins

[Master of Jumanji]

*As the count goes up the stairs, he's attacked by bats.*

Throughout your quest,
Knowledge is to keep.
Just remember what they say,
Always look before you leap.

[Schism]

Yay! New pets.
*Plucks the bats out of the air puts them in the convenient cage that happened to be at the foot of the stairs.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

Oh sure, keep unusually dangerous animals as pets!

Never mind about the poor idiot they almost killed!

And yes, I'm talking about me!

[Waterhammer]

Bats get a bum rap. Many eat bugs which is a good thing. Plus they are cool to watch as they hunt.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Applies bandages to the many I have just received from the bats.*

This is NOT how I intended to spend my birthday!

*Points to Schism's newly acquired "pets".*

For the record, those are African fruit bats. But, here in Jumanji, even the most docile and friendliest herbivores want to tear your faces off.

[Master of Jumanji]

Goodness me, I must say,
Hope that many things come your way.
I have a present, if I may,
To help wish you a happy birthday!

*The count promptly has acid poured on him.*

[Comte de Malodor]

Oogoogoogoogoo, I'm freakin' out! Serenity, tranquility, peace!

C'mon people now, smile on ya brother, everybody get together, try'ta loooove one another right now!

[Schism Hag]

Good thing that was acid and not Holy Water, Count.
*Casts inflict serious wounds on Count.
There. All better.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Is now in more intense pain.*

*Screams of agony.*

Please stop hurting me, I am badly injured!

*Manages to crawl up the stairs a bit.*

I've heard of birthday beatings, but this is ridiculous!

[Schism Hag]

You are undead.
inflict wounds should heal you.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

I know, but I'm not from this reality and Jumanji just wants to make me suffer.

[Master of Jumanji]

Your special day has passed,
And you are now so boring.
So here, this will help you,
Before we all start snoring.

*A faint blue glow flashes across the count and Schism's spell heals him.*

[Vidmaster7]

Sounds like I need to take a nap.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

Given how you haven't spoken in a while, I thought you had.

*Continues walking up the spiralling staircase.*

[Vidmaster7]

*ZZZZZZ* huh? oh *zzzzz*

[Schism]

Count Reiner Heydrich wrote:

*Continues walking up the spiralling staircase.*

Is there a big slide at the top?

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Shrugs.*

Who knows, unlikely as it is, Jumanji is capable of anything.

*As everyone is going further up the stairs, there's a brief interruption (as it were, as the stairs are separated by a small hallway with a door at the end of it.*

[Little Trevor]

hallocounthalloschismhallovidhallocomtedemalodorcomtecomtecomtedothelightbu lbtrickcomtepleeaaasecomtedothelightbulbtrickpleasepleasedoitareyoulistenin gcomtedothelightbulbtrickgooncomtedoitdothetrickcomtecomteyou'renotlistenin gcomtedothelightbulbtricknowdoitdoitcomtepleeaaassecomtedoitdothelightbulbt rick

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Looks at Little Trevor, looks at the group who nod, looks back at Little Trevor.*

*Kicks Little Trevor, sending him down the stairs.*

[Waterhammer]

We’ll call him Lil’ Tee.

[Vidmaster7]

Or you could call him an ambulance.... *peers down the stairs at Trevor*

[Waterhammer]

Nah. He bounces good.

[Aku, the shape shifting master]

*has horrible flashback of jumping samurais"

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

Guard your thoughts well, shapeshifter, or else Jumanji will exploit them.

Now, shall we continue up the stairs or shall we try the door?

[Old Doc Flumph]

Talk to Dr. Sigmund.
He will help you.

[Vidmaster7]

Only if you are having fantasies about close family members or other things that you shouldn't

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Has one of the remaining nameless adventurers go to the door.*

I'm sure nothing will happen, don't worry!

*As soon as the nameless adventurer touches the door, he is immediately electrified, killing him.*

OK, up the stairs we go.

*Continues walking up the new flight of stairs.*

[Schism]

I'm getting tired.
Could someone carry me?

[Vampire Schism]

Sigh

Such a child.

[Comte de Malodor]

Schism wrote:

I'm getting tired.

Could someone carry me?

I can fire you out of a 42 pounder, if you want.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Comes back down the stairs, picks Schism up in a bridal carry and continues back up the stairs.*

[AM GOLD]

And IIIIIIII,
Will always love youuuu,
Oogleoogleoooo...

[Vampire Schism]

Sorry Count.
I have no problem walking.

*Drops out of the Count's arms and proceeds up the stairs.

[Waterhammer]

Walk like an Egyptian.
Oh way, oh.

[Pappy Russ]

This here Egyptian could walk just fine if you dang-diggled crumb-bums hadn't'a hidden his cane!!!

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Pushes Pappy Russ down the stairs, amusing us all.*

That's quite alright, Vampire Schism, I just knew that your other selves would complain no matter what.

[Schism Hag]

Hey now!
Don't put me in that category.
And no, I am not complaining.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

My apologies. I didn't know who was going to say something, so I had to keep it generic.

*Reaches near the top of the stairs, stops for a moment to pear out of the nearby window.*

Quite the lovely view, despite the fact that Jumanji is just plain dangerous. Try not to lean out too much though.

*Sees AM GOLD ignore my advice and leans out the window, only to be taken away by a pterosaur.*

Didn't see that coming, I must admit.

[Vidmaster7]

So wait is their dinosaurs in Jumanji?

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

There's just about anything and everything in Jumanji. It all depends on whether it's a creation of Ibsen or something Jumanji brought about itself.

[Vidmaster7]

I guess that does fit with its name.

[Pulg's Fairy Monkeyboard Trio]

Everything, you say? Including the Classic Keys expansion card for the 1992-93 Yamaha DX-7?!

[Schism Spice]

I'm sure you can't just find it.
You would have to go on a quest.
It doesn't really matter anyway.
What is found in Jumanji stays in Jumanji.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Hugs Schism Spice and Vidmaster7.*

Finally, you guys are starting to truly get it!

*Cries a bit, stopping only when everyone tells me to get a grip.*

Sorry about that, let's continue on, shall we?

[Schism Spice]

Bardic Knowledge has its uses.

[Ripto]

*A small vortex opens up.*

*Suddenly gets dropped from the sky.*

*Tries to move out of the way of something else but is too slow.*

[Gnasty Gnorc]

*Appears out of the vortex (which then disappears).*

*Lands on Ripto.*

[Ripto]

GET OFF OF ME YOU USELESS BUFFOON!!

[Vidmaster7]

Harsh.

[Pulg]

But fair.