The meat was very tender, but had a strange aftertaste, and after eating half of it, I felt the intense need to sit in a corner and drink myself into a coma.
The next poster is a militant vegan.
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And Vega will become the most powerful Solar System in the galaxy.
The next poster has already fallen to our mighty army.
Oh yes, we can indeed mount lasers on anything you want, animal, plant, or mineral. If you will look to your left here in our testing facility, you will see a number of our "home defense" animals, kittens, puppies, and other small animals all equipped with a high intensity anti-personnel lasers. On the next shelf is our "garden party" line, trees and shrubs all equipped with motion activated laser turrets, patent pending.
The next poster wishes to sue my company for gross negligence in the death of her dog due to one of our products.
So it was you, you bastich! Little Fluffing climbed a tree to get away from that mean old dog, when suddenly the tree electrocuter her.
You will be hearing from my lawyer.
The next poster goes around, but not comes around.
Those Yes tribute band rehearsals were hell. Hell, I say!
The next poster has seen the circle of Hades devoted to punishing Prog Rock musicians and would like to describe how they are tormented.
Modern pop music. That's it. They are allowed to live a relatively normal life, but modern pop music is played in a loop in perpetuity.
The next poster has made a concept album made only with five strong bass guitar and glockenspiel, and will tell us abut the first single.
Boat nothing! It was the "unsinkable" Titanic. And they claimed it was an iceberg, but I know better. I saw the accursed thing fall. Dang near got conked in the head by an end table that came flying out. At least I was able to use it as a life raft.
The next poster also survived some great disaster caused by a falling object but was blamed on something else.
Well, a huge boulder came rolling down a mountain side onto the holiday retreat. I was out to get groceries, wasn't bothered one bit.
But the other devils blamed me for not putting a scrying spot nearby to witness the chaos. Better luck next time.
The next poster has deviced a terribly evil mindf4cking trap, for those dungeon exploring adventurers to run into.
It's called a wife.
The next poster has experienced the horrors of this trap firsthand.
It wasn't so much the wife trap that did the damage, but the secondary effect that came with it - The Mother-in-Law.
The next poster has a well balanced life.
They said it was healthy eating all those vitamin supplements, homeopathic pills, ayurvedic stuff, traditional chinese medicines, herbal teas, immune system boosters, fatty acid supplements, protein bars, detox treatments, aromatherapy, spinal restructuring... Now, after doing all that for six months, I am completely balanced. There are things that have me slightly worried, of course, such as red dots all over my skin, which has turned an interesting shade of orange, large hairy tufts on no less than forty three places, no excrements for three weeks, and strange geometric patterns in my entire field of vision. oh, and I fall asleep all the time. It is good to be balanced, though.
The next poster finds this awesome!
43 hairy tufts - wow! Amazing start! Fantastic! Keep it up!
The next poster has gone one step beyond the above and would like to tell us what else we need to do to look like Gwyneth Paltrow.
Wear the skin of her face as a mask
The next poster will tell us what GOOP is.
So? Cars burn good.
Next poster be organizing new traffic jam, to rob big bank.
It involves 1000 rats, an ice cream truck, 15 children and a screwdriver.
The next poster went on a date with Poog.
And now my therapist's a rich man !
The next poster likes the color yellow.
Yellow gold, actually.
The next poster has an infatuation that must not be named.
I have a number of them. But I -will- name them for you. They include [REDACTED. In the name of all that's holy, REDACTED!]
The next poster shares at least one of my infatuations, and will describe it.
GoatToucher and I we like putting on mauve pantaloons with bright red codpieces, and platform boots. Then we break into empty malls at night for impromptu naked-torso disco sessions. We are often joined by Gubbli, our awakened nishikigoi carp disco-beat demon.
The next poster is a ninja of an uncommon type.
I use firearms and high explosives. Do you know just how talented you have to be to render those things silent? It ain't easy.
The next poster has a collection of glass figurines of something unusual.
He was dwarf toucher until I beat it out of him
The next poster caught GoatToucher touching kobalds.
Yep, maybe the little horns threw GT off his game, but man where those kobolds angry, and at least a few of them were...dangerously curious.
The next poster is the therapist of one of those kobolds.
I was trained to sniff out bombs, drugs, and people, not traps...
... especially traps with the sole purpose of keeping GoatToucher at bay. Those things are not only vicious beyond all measure and well hidden but rigged to set off other traps if they are even tampered with in the slightest. Only an insane fool would dare to take that job.
The next poster is such a fool.
There has to be a reason why I like playing rogues so much. Answer: Mythic Deathwish!
The next person would like to show us the path to becoming Mythic Chazzie Bronson.
I was. Allow me to demonstrate!
:demonstrates. The results are predictable, and cause 1d6+2 Wisdom damage per minute observing:
The next poster will towel me off after that bracing exercise.
And then I will brace you off after this towelling exercise.
Actually, I will do neither of those things. I have a leedle fren' who does these things for me, and the Next Poster is my leedle fren'
Puh-lease, I am still woofing cookies after your show with the horde.
The next poster gets to clean up the mess.
That I can do, ::applies flamethrower liberally:: and clean!
The next poster likes to bake special cookies for GT.
It is really the only dignified way to go, and I die happily, for nerdy pale 90's redheads with glasses kill me in more ways than one.
The next poster unfortunately lost a game of cake or death.
Poog not know Poog not get cake if kill other player.
But kill halfling fun anyway.
Next pozter invented brand new sound
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the musical stylings of: The Brown Tones!
The next poster listened to our full thirty minute set.
Max's really got them pinned down.
Sam really likes to rub his balls before action.
The next poster shares who his favorite character was in the old UK series 'the Young ones'.
It was obviously Vyvyan.
"This calls for a delicate blend of psychology and extreme violence. "
The next poster will not clean the toilet, as it would lose all its character.
This is an original GG Allin and I will not see it sullied, er, unsullied by the likes of you.
The next poster knows the secret of delightful armpits.
It was obviously Vyvyan.
"This calls for a delicate blend of psychology and extreme violence. "
For once i agree with you.
-------------------------------------Delightful armpits require regular appliance of shower cream and smooth skin. According to some commercials anyway...
The next poster was the one IR-Baboon was based upon.
Indeed. Nobody knows better than I that you don't need pants for the victory dance.
The next poster is my special weasel.
I am too 'weaselly' persuaded. Oh, the shame.
The next poster wishes to raise their self esteem.