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The seizure of Laptops for Data inspection happens with increasing regularity at US-Canadian Borders as Homeland Security become increasingly involved in Data Traffic inspections that they have no capacity to inspect via internet connections. First will be the suspicion that the Canadians are smuggling out American Secrets, then comes the diplomatic incident, then comes the military incursion, and it ends in the USA invading Canada.
American secrets. LOL.
We have things we don't want you to know. The problem is with the internet there is no chance of you not finding out. Believing it is another subject however. :) Plus what could the canucks actually do if we invaded?
Don't laugh. I was part of a strike force sent in to pierce the heart of Manitoba. A town called Bloodvein. Gargoyles perched atop liquor store roofs disgorged hot maple syrup down onto our hapless recon team. They died in sweet skin-bubbling agony. The rest of use were snuck up on by highly trained deathmoose, tied up and then whipped about the face with beaver tails (the bakery treat... not actual beaver tails cuz that would be ridiculous). They then untied us and sent us skateless out onto a frozen lake and lit us up with slap shot hockey pucks. Ferguson went down first, crushed temple. Melendez caught one in the throat and died of internal bleeding. I consider myself lucky for making it out of there with eighty six fractures and a bruised spleen.
How precise was their attack? The bruise on said spleen was shaped like a maple leaf. Don't mess with those guys. They mess back hard and weird.
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Well they did have one tough fighter on their side, unfortunately for them he has since passed away. unfortunately for us as well.
I thought we already took over in Canada.
Invading Canada? What country will I go to to avoid the draft?
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RPG Superstar 2009 Top 8
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I can't imagine the invasion happening any time before April. I mean, seriously, why bother coming in this weather?Well if Canada wants to strike first this weather would be perfect. I mean we are not used to this cold but its nothing for our nothern neighbors.
Yes, but our wives are wearing fuzzy warm sweaters and we would rather stay home and snuggle.
Look yonder the horizon. I see them approaching.
On mooseback.
We must make an assault on Molson. Hit them where it hurts. Then turn 'round yonder to Quebec and promise them that we may allow them to secede. Do what the Bay of Pigs couldn't.
Uh....undocumented laborers? They're everywhere these days.
Don't laugh. I was part of a strike force sent in to pierce the heart of Manitoba. A town called Bloodvein. Gargoyles perched atop liquor store roofs disgorged hot maple syrup down onto our hapless recon team. They died in sweet skin-bubbling agony.
Boiled man in syrup tastes awesome. You should have stolen a lick before they caught you. I mean they're Canadians. They wouldn't begrudge you that.
...or so I'm told.
Well they did have one tough fighter on their side, unfortunately for them he has since passed away. unfortunately for us as well.
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Well they did have one tough fighter on their side, unfortunately for them he has since passed away. unfortunately for us as well.You forgot Shatner. Also Canadian.
You misunderstand. I did not forget.:P
Let's face it; hordes of Canadians infiltrated Hollywood culture. It's only a matter of time before they spew their dominionist propaganda upon us. We must act. WITH GREAT JUSTICE!
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Well they did have one tough fighter on their side, unfortunately for them he has since passed away. unfortunately for us as well.You forgot Shatner. Also Canadian.
You claim him?
American secrets. LOL.What's that, like who's the Prime Minister of Canada?
Yah. Whatshisname.
What's funny is, the two most popular Canadians in the world, just by sheer number of people who can recognize them: Da Shan and Norman Bethune.
These two are household names in the entirety of China. Few Canadians know who they are.
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The seizure of Laptops for Data inspection happens with increasing regularity at US-Canadian Borders as Homeland Security become increasingly involved in Data Traffic inspections that they have no capacity to inspect via internet connections. First will be the suspicion that the Canadians are smuggling out American Secrets, then comes the diplomatic incident, then comes the military incursion, and it ends in the USA invading Canada.
This has been a major legal concern in the USA. This issue hasn't found its way through court yet, but most legal scholars believe that Homeland Security has no authority to do this without reasonable suspicion. Given the two recent domestic terrorist plots this Christmas in Detroit this problem is only going to get worse.
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American secrets. LOL.What's that, like who's the Prime Minister of Canada?Yah. Whatshisname.
What's funny is, the two most popular Canadians in the world, just by sheer number of people who can recognize them: Da Shan and Norman Bethune.
These two are household names in the entirety of China. Few Canadians know who they are.
Who?
Thanks for the post.
Ergh!
*facepalms*
Well ... at least we'd only have to indoctrinate half of the population into butchering the Queen's English... with wierd semi-French accents. ^_^
On the other hand, completing the land connection to Alaska would finally happen.
Heck, I'm just going as far as London so I can eat some Poutine at the local Burger King with the Mennonites.
Oui!
US invade Canada? What is this 1812 all over again?LMAO
Actually "we" don't say that.
We do like to say that British (with some local British-Canadians) troops occupied Washington and burned down a good part of Washington DC. American textbooks that I've read refer to these troops as "hooligans". Truth told the attack on Washington was a response to the looting of York (omitted from the high school history texts I saw), where Americans pillaged a Canadian city. Up until York, such actions were not considered fair warfare... but hey, America tossed out the rules.
Anyway... Canada was not yet a nation and could not have won a war, even if Britain HAD won. There was no decisive victory, just some good laughs at the burning White House and Library of Congress. Haha.
We do enjoy referring to the bungled invasion attempt by America, however. The invasion was soundly repelled not just by red-coats, but also troops contributed by other European countries (Hessian mercenaries among them)... The way I hear it George Washington wanted all of Quebec. Some General named Thompson f#$$ed it up by leading the Americans right into a newly reinforced British entrenchment. To America's credit, they did get what is today part of Ohio during subsequent peace talks.
So, thus far, America's war record with Canada is a pretty dismal.
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Captain Kirk,....what is this earth thing called a......poutine?
"Whyit's.....oneofthe reasons.....I wearthis.....mangirdle. ThatI wear."
Wait, did someone just say poutine?
Aw heck yeah! Let's get 'em!
Yes! Learned about its decadent existence back in 2004 during the summer when taking a several day dip beyond the Great Lakes. Ingenius, I thought. We must conquer them when we come back at a later date.
Well ... at least we'd only have to indoctrinate half of the population into butchering the Queen's English... with wierd semi-French accents. ^_^
On the other hand, completing the land connection to Alaska would finally happen.
Yah, everyone has been waiting for that for so long. American can finally feel whole. Hehe.
Because of my hearing impairment, when I heard poutine mentioned at the BK I stopped at on my trek northwards toward the wild mooselands, I thought the person jockeying the cashier said poontang. I said to myself, "you can buy that here? What a great country! I must come back again to conquer these natives."
Captain Kirk,....what is this earth thing called a......poutine?
"Whyit's.....oneofthe reasons.....I wearthis.....mangirdle. ThatI wear."
I know the owner of the company that makes Shatner's hair piece. I feel so complete.