Journal of Katrina Islaran (STAP Journal)

[Katrina Islaran]

Journal of Katrina Islaran
In this Year 592

My grandfather gave me this journal. He suggested I use it to chronicle my adventurers and record my thoughts. After some thought I've decided to do so. If nothing else should my party meet with disaster it may survive to tell those that discover us long dead who we were, what we did, and give them some clue as to how we died. At best recording my memories of each day may help me recall some important detail at a later date.

Given with the journal was a warning – two of my uncles have gone missing in the last three months and he suspects foul play. Were I still living on the streets I might be inclined to write off the disappearance of two men in such a time – murder is not terribly uncommon in the Azure district – but for two nobles of the same family to disappear is at the very least highly unusual. I'll keep an eye out for trouble and do my best to watch my back with the other, though I think so long as I'm with my companions I'll be safe. There aren't a lot of people eager to cross swords with the Four Blades. The fact that we're leaving Sasserine should further ease his worries. I doubt someone will go through the trouble of tracking down the Islaran family's wayward black sheep of a daughter so far out of the line of inheritance.

I suppose if I am going to describe my adventurers I should start at the very beginning, with my birth and upbringing.

You can take the girl out of the street but you can't take the street out of the girl. My 'family' learned that the hard way. They took me in, I believe, with mixed intentions. Obviously they were trying to mitigate the damage of my revelation as the bastard daughter of one of their sons, Dorian Islaran, but I think perhaps for Keltar Islaran, my grandfather, there was more to it.

My mother was not a whore, but nor was she a chaste virgin. One of her sometime lovers for many years was Dorian Islaran. I suppose I should call the man my father, but I have never thought of him as such. She conceived in one of their brief unions and I was the result. For the first twelve years of my life I never knew the man was my father. I grew up in the Azure district and had an interesting early childhood as nearly all children from that district do. I never questioned the absence of a father in my life,it isn't all that uncommon in the slums of the city, if anything those with a father in their life were the unusual ones.

I was a precocious child, smart enough to think up plans to get myself and my friends in more trouble then was normal even for the Azure district but seldom wise enough to avoid attempting them. Before my tenth birthday I was in a street gang.

They're fairly common throughout Sasserine, though most of them hail from the Azure district or Shadowshore. The rougher ones obviously from the later. For the most part they go unnoticed in the city, they're the pickpockets, minor thieves, and brawlers in the alleys over territory amongst each other. Most of the members are children and those in their early teens. Those who are too young to earn a living wage. By the time you enter your later teens you've usually picked up a job as a laborer or some such and can support yourself. Most members are orphans or come from families too poor to feed them. I came from neither but was drawn in all the same. Mostly I thought the idea was exciting, wanted the companionship, and savored the opportunities it provided to get into trouble.

You pick up an affinity for knives and clubs fairly quickly when you're fighting over turf. Given their use it's miraculous that the streets aren't littered with dying youngster. I was no different then most and before long I knew how to stab, club, and fight with the best. I learned how to attack someone from behind, pick a pocket, lie convincingly, sneak around, and spot an ambush. All skills that I use to this day. I don't think I ever killed anyone, but I had my fair share of scrapes. I probably would have eventually been picked up as a thief eventually if my lie hadn't changed when I was twelve.

Somehow the Kellani family got wind of my mothers relationship with Dorian Islaran and put together that I was likely the result. They leaked the information among the noble circles and caused quite a scandal. The result was that one day a group of well dressed men arrived at my home and took me away to the Islaran manor as my mother assured me it was the best for me.

I'm over simplifying it of course, but that was how I perceived it at the time. I later discovered my they had approached my mother with the offer and promise of providing me with a noble life. I think she knew they were for the most part trying to save face by adopting their “poor bastard daughter” off the street, but she saw it as an opportunity to keep me out of trouble and provide me with a better life. I didn't perceive it as such though. I went from scraping in the streets and plotting petty theft to sitting in pampered rooms watched over by a governess while being told to do my lace and stitching like a proper lady. I went from practical pants and shirts to frilly dresses that were both uncomfortable and impractical.

I was miserable. Of course I found opportunities to sneak out. I visited my mother often. She always accepted me with open arms and only occasionally serrated me for sneaking out to see her once she realized it was pointless. She did always make a point of walking me back to the manor though. I went through five governess in less then a year. None knew how to deal with me. I laughed at their punishments and mocked their attempts educate me in the proper manner of a lady while doing everything in my power to make them miserable. Before I was fifteen even Keltar's patience was at it's end with my escapades.

I was sent halfway across the city to the House of the Dragon. Legendary for it's ability to turn delinquents into proper nobles I cannot say I was able to completely resist it's influence – in no small part because they rather quickly discovered they needed something to channel my energy into and provided me with an outlet – magic.

Of course not all of their “success” with me can be attributed to their teaching and discipline. The longer I spent living as a noble the less interested my former friends and gang mates became in my company. That many of them were rapidly growing acquiring more legitimate hobbies or were being sent to various work camps helped drive me more into my new life as much as anything else. Between fourteen and sixteen I reluctantly resigned myself to my new life. At some point I realized that I should be grateful for it. I had three meals a day, a safe place to live and sleep, clean clothing, and the opportunity to study a truly remarkable subject. While I never truly threw myself into my study of magic or into an attempt to become a noble I did reluctantly accept their embrace. To an extent at least. I still refuse to this day to accept the embrace of a man simply for the sake of a politically and socially convenient marriage – not that my family didn't attempt several times to set one up with various eligible young nobles from around the city.

When I graduated from the House of the Dragon at 17 I hardly recognized myself. They even had me wearing the uncomfortable, though not as impractical as I thought, dresses. Post graduation was a rather depressing time. I found myself largely occupied with nothing, sitting in my prescribed room at Islaran manor trying to dodge suiters.

My boredom was alleviated in an unexpected way when Kiel a friend from my childhood on the street approached me about accompanying him and several others I knew in passing on what amounted to an adventure. They had information about a forgotten crypt but had reason to believe it would require magic to open, thus they turned too the only mage they knew and weren't completely terrified of. While my family was disapproving to say the least I eventually decided to join them. I'll recount the full story of that adventure at another time, but suffice it to say we found the crypt, we fought for our lives, and we found more treasure then I could have imagined only a few years before. In short order I was perhaps not addicted but certainly enchanted by adventuring. The short expedition rekindled something of the trouble seeking spirit I had as a child. I enjoyed the freedom, the sense of purpose, the thrill, and the danger. And yes, I enjoyed the company of friends.

Over the last year and a half we've gone on several more adventures and gained something of a name for ourselves. We even adopted a name – the Four Blades – though I insist it is somewhat misleading. More often then not I don't use a blade.

I suspect that's why we were approached two weeks ago by Lady Vanderboren. She revealed to us that she intends on journeying to the legendary Isle of Dread to establish a colony and asked that we accompany her. At first some of us were hesitant about the idea, but in the end we signed on. Even if the Isle doesn't quite match it's reputation there are plenty of stops along the way of interest.

We leave at dawn tomorrow.

* * *

Weeks at sea is far more boring then it sounds. For four adventurers it's more boring then I had thought possible. For the first day we made due tossing dice, playing cards, and recounting stories. By the second we were sitting around doing nothing. Now on the third we are ready to beat our heads against the deck. I think what's the most sick is that at any moment our boredom could turn into excitement with so simple a call of sail on the horizon.

* * *

Three weeks into the trip. We finally found something to occupy us – learning to sail. We've spent most of the last two weeks doing exactly that. It isn't terribly difficult, but nor is it especially easy. Mostly it's the kind of work that you have to pay attention to. Of course we aren't left to sail the vessel, her crew cling stubbornly to their jobs. Perhaps it's because they know the boredom that awaits if you aren't doing something at sea for such a long period.

* * *

Five weeks into the trip. We should be reaching Tamoachan tomorrow according to our charts. The Blades and I can hardly wait. While learning to sail has helped fill the endless hours of bordem we are beginning to grow bored even with it. Rich in particular is spoiling for a fight. I don't know if he'll get one but the ruins should at least hold some interest. Shame we won't be able to stop for more then one day, but more then that will keep us from meeting up with the Vanderborens again at Fort Blackwell as we arranged.

* * *

If I ever get my hands on that treacherous scum I'll cut off his balls, shove them down his throat, then strangle him. The moment our rowboat hit sand the Blue Eagle's sails unfurled, it weighed anchor, and it made for the open sea leaving us far behind. We could do little more then wave our hands futilely as it stranded us nearly a thousand miles from any civilization. Had it been closer I'd have blown the ship apart, but Lars Helvur plotted his treachery well and the ship was more then a hundred feet outside of my range. It didn't keep Michael from firing a couple arrows at the Blue Eagle as it sailed away, but his shots fell well short as we knew they would.

Speculation as to the cause of the treachery has been postponed until we get out of this jungle, though I cannot help but remember my grandfather's warning before we left port. After a little more then an hour of kicking the sand in frustration and anger we set to figuring out how to survive.

We pooled our supplies and found ourselves woefully short on both food and water. None of us packed more then a few trail rations for the day's exploring. Our waterskins are full but I fear the heat won't allow them to last long. Thus our first concern is locating both. We are all lamenting our lack of a priest. Thinking a pair of healing wands would be sufficient to replace one was woefully ignorant. The healing the wands offer will do little to save us from dehydration or starvation.

Still, bleak as the situation would be for most I'm optimistic about our chances. When Lady Vanderboren discovers the treachery I'm confident she'll arrange for a rescue. If nothing else we are resourceful and these ruins are explored fairly frequently. If we can locate a reliable source of food and water we should be able to wait for the next ship and barter passage. We'll begin exploring the ruins tomorrow. Surely if the Olman built a city here there must be a water source nearby.

Lars Helvur will regret crossing the Four Blades yet.

* * *

Rich is dead. We vastly underestimated the danger of this place. While poking around a tomb he triggered a trap that blasted him in the face with an acid gas. It ate through his face and throat in seconds. He was dead before we could react. Probably before he hit the ground.

We still haven't found a steady source of water and our skins are almost dry. Tomorrow we're going to head further into the ruins to see if we can't locate a river or something. Everyone is quite around the camp tonight. There isn't any joking or laughing. This entire situation is just so deadly serious. It was before but I don't think any of us realized it until we were looking at Rich's corpse.

For the first time in a long time I'm afraid.

* * *

Journal of Katrina Islaran
In this Year 596

Keil is dead. Rich is dead. Paul is dead. My grandfather is dead. The Vanderborens are dead.

They say I've been frozen in stone for four years. It's funny, I recall the moment I was frozen as if it just happened. I don't remember being frozen. I was creeping up behind the basilisk when it turned on me then... I was on their ship – the Sea Wyvern if I caught the name correctly. Remembering that battle brings back hard memories. We came around the corner and found ourselves face to face with it. Keil jumped in front of me and shoved me to the side. I never even saw what it was but by the time I got up off the ground to call him out I found myself face to face with his statue. Paul and I decided to come at it from two directions to kill it. I was right behind it ready to cut it apart when it spun on me, there was a flash, and then I was on the Sea Wyvern surrounded by strangers.

They introduced themselves as Patamon, Joliet Johaberdash, Heinrick Gilantheril, Jerard Matthias, and Achrias Feserkal. Then they proceeded to explain how almost everyone I care about is dead in with brutal honesty. My grandfather was murdered by a group called the Lotus Dragons headed by a member of the Kellani family. My Paul and Keil were both rendered statues and smashed. Richard... I already knew was dead, but it makes the pain no less fresh. His death was as far as I'm concerned only yesterday. The Vanderborens were slain by their son Vanthus – apparently to gain his inheritance early. I don't know what senseless death cuts me more. My friends who died so the Kellani family could get me out of the way, or the Vanderboren – good folk – at the hands of their own kin over money. No, that's not true, I know what death hurts the worst.

Keil is dead. Those three words cut so deep. I never thought it could happen. It seems stupid really. I guess we were all caught up in some youthful feelings of invincibility. Adventuring is lethal and we all knew it, but we never thought it would happen to us. I certainly never thought it would happen to Keil. Not at 19. Not before I told him that I loved him. That I'd loved him since our childhood, for most of our life. He died without ever knowing. Without so much as a word or a kiss. I'll never forgive myself for letting some perceived notions of nobility get between us.

Fate is a cruel b*~*~. She returned him to my life for less then a year before taking him away forever.

I should note that I wasn't the only one who lost someone today. The expedition lost one of their own – one Arien. The ships first mate Mari seemed particularly shaken up. I'd mourn their lose but I just have too much of my own to find room for someone I never met.

Joliet went on to share something of her life as we continued to talk. I think they were trying to distract me from thoughts of those I've lost. It worked to an extent. Her life is a sadder tail then even my own, a orphan and slave nearly burned as a witch who recently only avoided death by some odd twist of fate. Apparently she's a sorceress of no small skill. She heckled me a bit about my age – apparently 18 is super young. This lead of course to the question of her age... which she isn't sure of. I suppose that as a slave it wasn't tracked. I think it would be fair to say I like Joliet.

At some point the question as to my talents arose, which lead into a discussion as to fair fights. I explained my philosophy with the story of Markus from down on Harpoon Street. A fair fight is one you're doing something wrong in. People that expect one's are the one's who die with knives in their back. For a moment I was afraid I'd offended Heinrick, their apparent leader with the reference – he himself is a swordsmen, but he laughed it off.

It was growing late by that time and Patamon confessed a need to return to the Blue Nixie, the new Lady Vanderboren's vessel. The irony that I was rescued by her expedition is not lost on me. I must confess here a mild desire to meet Lavinia again. I think when we last met she was 15, just before she went off to Finishing School. Now she has several years on me. Apparently she is in a relationship with Heinrick. It was obvious from the way he spoke of her, but in case it wasn't Joliet felt the need to point out that they were sleeping together. Meeting someone I remember as my own age should be a shock.. I suppose I'm happy that she's found someone, a commoner even – for Heinrick is certainly no noble. Someone should have a love story. The question of sleeping arrangements just came up. It was made clear that there was some bad blood between the deceased – Arien – and Patamon. The details were not explained, but I must confess I'm curious. Patamon for his part is polite, humble, and charming. Not a man who I would think it easy to pick a fight. Apparently he does have something of a mean streak though once you're on his bad side. His callousness about the man's death was a striking departure from his earlier demeanor.

In the end we worked out the sleeping arrangements with Avner Meravanchi who was kind enough to volunteer his bed for myself, while Joliet who had previously been sleeping on the floor ended up in Arien's old bed. Avner is quite the charmer himself, and if I'm not mistaken he has his eye on Joliet. I can't blame him, she is stunningly beautiful. She for her part is seemingly oblivious to his intense interest.

I don't want to sleep. I fear the nightmare's that may haunt my sleep, but I'm suddenly exhausted. I suppose it is better to meet sleep on my own terms then risk falling asleep with this open.

* * *

I cried myself to sleep last night. I'm so ashamed. I haven't cried since I was 11 when I was forced to leave my mother behind, but I couldn't keep back the tears. I think it really hit me that I'd never see Keil again. That he lies in a pile of rock somewhere in those gods forsaken ruins. Thankfully I had a deep dreamless night's sleep.

The sleep did little to relieve my weariness but I forced myself to get up when morning came. I can't lay around bed all day. I have to do something. If nothing else I'll avenge my friends. I'll kill that bastard Lars Helvur if it's the last thing I do.

I ate some of the breakfast lain out and found a spot on the deck to spend the morning. Heinrick drilled with his friend Jerard, sparing savagely. I tried watching them but couldn't do it. Jerard reminds me of Paul. Apparently he didn't sleep last night. I found myself watching the sea and listening to them. I caught something about an ordeal he suffered and a demon but didn't catch the details. I had trouble focusing on their conversation.

I was shaken from my day dreaming by a yell from the Captain – at Joliet of all people – and a yelp from one of the boys. I think Jerard said something to me as he headed down to the deck but I didn't catch it. Meanwhile Heinrick was marching up to the Captain like a man condemned. Joliet called her a b*~*~ yesterday. Maybe she is. She was certainly quite the personality but I found her personable enough – more on that later.

I was so focused on watching him that I was a little surprised when Joliet slid up next to me. She asked me how I slept and I answered more or less truthfully. I didn't include my crying and though I'm sure she heard it she didn't press the issue. Bless her for it. We discussed fate. Damn her for it. She mentioned her belief in fate, her suspension that my rescue was fate. I expressed my own embittered thoughts on fate which did nothing to dampen her mood. The woman is an endless font of positivity. Given her past I don't know how. I found myself confiding to her my feelings for Keil. I don't know why. Something about that woman draws me in. I trust her.

Achrias came over. The man looked ill but I didn't say anything of it. Joliet commented vaguely but he waved it off. He asked us to tell Heinrick to see him down below but it proved unnecessary as Heinrick walked over, much more meekly after his conversation with the Captain, and Achrias was able to pass on the message himself.

Heinrick came asking of I had any experience navigating. I responded that I did and he urged me to talk to the Captain – Amella – about it. I somewhat reluctantly agreed with Joliet flitted off to retrieve a somewhat shifty looking fellow who goes by Skald. It seems she's friends with everyone on the ship. More maybe I should more accurately say she has all the men infatuated with her and the women charmed. Judging from Skald's behavior around her it seems he has an interest in the half-elven sorceress as well. His ears have a faint point to them. If I had to guess I'd say second generation half-elf, but I didn't comment on it. I'm getting ahead of myself.

I introduced myself to the Captain who informed me that the man who had fallen the day before was the ships navigator. She asked if I could navigate while Joliet returned with Skald. She quizzed both of us and seemed to find me the better, appointing me the senior navigator and asking him to assist me while remarking that it was good to have two people between the position and Urol. I'm not sure why she dislikes him so, but I wouldn't be surprised if it had something to do with the odor he exudes. Joliet insists that she tried to clean him up and it had no effect. I'll take her word for it. He smells so bad I don't want to get close enough to do so myself. I spent the next several hours putting the charts and maps in order with Skald who proved to be capable. The previous navigator was very through so it wasn't difficult. Mostly it was familiarizing myself with our course. I passed on as much to the Captain, it never hurts to speak well of the dead.

Speaking of odor I caught a whiff of myself while working with Skald. The Captain was kind enough to let me use her cabin to change when I asked, though the indicated that it wasn't something I should get used to and mildly berated me for my modesty. She needn't have, I was almost as embarrassed to ask as I would have been to change before the others. What's happened to the skinny 11 year old that had no problems changing in a room full of other kids? Is it because I now have something to hide beneath my skirts and shirts or because of the time I spent in Islaran manor? I suspect it's a combination of both. I could always vanish and change, but that would get tiresome quickly. Hopefully I'll be able to keep my current garb, my orange and blue shoulderless dress that my grandfather loved so much, clean for a time. I almost threw my old clothing away but instead stuffed it in my bag where it quickly vanished. I'll get it cleaned properly when we next make port. I contemplated adding some jewelery but in the end decided in just my silver ring and my headband. I think asking to use the cabin came across as silly enough and the last image I want to put forward is that of someone seeking a suitor.

On my way back to the Captain to thank her I spotted an argument brewing between Heinrick and Avner. I was somewhat hesitant to get involved and decided to get a second opinion from the Captain on the issue while I was on the way. She filled in some of the blanks for me. Heinrick owns the ship, but Avner's family helped finance the voyage. I suppose a power struggle was inevitable between the two. I decided to see if I couldn't stop the fight before it got ugly and arrived just as Avner was leaving to hear Heinrick throw out quite the insult, if I recall correctly it was “pretentious, stuffed-shirt prick.” Of course Avner heard it and spun to continue the argument. They traded jabs for a moment before Joliet caught their attention playing the oblivious vocalist. She caught Avner's attention with her song – a rather colorful tune about a mermaid and her desire to walk the land, while I led Heinrick away.

I tried explaining to him the futility of arguing with a noble, though he insisted he wasn't doing so and that his insult wasn't supposed to be heard by Avner. I don't believe the later. I don't necessarily disagree with the points Heinrick raised, but this is not an ideal world. We have to work within the world are are given and in it nobles are for the most part the authority. Heinrick went on to insist that he wasn't arguing with Avner or trying to fight him. Anyone who watched the exchange knows that isn't true but I let it slide. He commented that Arien had conflicted much more with Avner then he ever did.

I'd like to ask someone but I'm not willing to open so fresh a wound. Perhaps I'll ask Mari about Arien. I think that I'd like to speak of Keil right now, maybe she'll feel the same way. Thus far she hasn't said so much as a word to me. I hope she doesn't blame me for Arien's death. Perhaps we can bond over our shared tales of loss. If nothing else I'll find out if she hates me.

Heinrick and I talked for a few minutes more so he could cool his head. He's in a relationship with Lady Vanderboren but worries about the scandal that the revelation will cause in Sasserine – though apparently everyone on the ship but Anver already knows about their relationship. I can't blame him, but I did encourage him to chase her. I mentioned that her mother had been common born and it seemed to raise his spirits. I left him with the thought that if he was to become a member of the nobility he'd need to learn to be more civil with them.

Joliet caught up with me having finished talking with Avner at around the same time. She'd had the same thought as to breaking up the fight between the boys. We talked for a while about trying to get them to play nice with each other in the future. We talked about her feelings for Avner – or lack there of. We talked about Mari and Arien, and we talked about family. I guess inevitably we talked about Keil. I ended up crying in her arms. My cheeks burn now just thinking about it, but I cannot feel that much shame. I lost the love of my life. If that is not worth crying over I don't know what is. I don't think I've ever made a friend so quickly that I've trusted so fully. I never told anyone that I cared for Keil, yet I spilled it out to Joliet after knowing her for only two days. I don't know what it is about her, but she seems so trustworthy. I don't think she has a mean bone in her body.

The others in her group I haven't spoken too as much. Heinrick's heart is in the right place, even if he does seem rather stubborn. Jerard I've only spoken too once. Apparently he's on the night watch. Achrias, the priest, is rather quiet. I don't think he's been feeling well though, which may explain his reservation. No one wants illness on a ship. I hope he gets well soon. Some of the crew gave him an some odd looks that don't bode well. I'd like to think that the Captain can control her crew, she's certainly a strong woman, but sailors get superstitious on ships.

I think the scratching of my quill and might light stone is keeping others up. I'll write more tomorrow.

Journal of Katrina Islaran
In this Year 592

The nightmares finally came. For three nights in a row I've been chased through my dreams by nameless and named foes, seen and unseen monsters. I see Keil die a dozen different ways, I watch my grandfather knifed to death, hacked apart, and shot, and I run. Through cities, jungles, ruins, and under the sea I flee attackers I never see. Keil's corpse asks me why I let him die. My other friends from every age try to protect me, hide me, and all die horribly. In the end I'm left alone.

I woke from these dreams in horrible sweats, my hair matted and my clothing clinging to me in a most unladylike fashion. If anyone noticed they were kind enough to avoid commenting on it.

After breakfast we had our first excitement. Lady Vanderboren and Patamon along with two mercenaries in her service came over by rowboat to plan for the Scarlet Brotherhood blockade. I rose late and was rubbing the sleep from my eyes and headed to the deck while they we climbing aboard. I'm sure I looked like a mess, but again everyone was too polite to comment.

Lady Lavinia Vanderboren strongly favors her mother, with the same golden brown hair, blue eyes, and curves. Her skin favors her father, more cream then bronze. In short, she's beautiful. She carried a rapier at her hip that I suppose looks at out of place as the one I wear, and wore a top cut low enough to be not entirely appropriate. Her companions included a man in breastplate with a large sword – though not so large as the two handed monster Heinrick carries with him – with dark ragged hair and dark eyes. He wasn't ugly, though he isn't particularly handsome. More of his beauty comes from his well toned body, the rippling muscles obvious in his arms and neck, rather then his face which bares several nasty scars, including one that is particularly distinctive between his eyes and another across his nose. He moved like a man who knew his way around a fight, and with surprising grace, even more so even then many elves I've known, given his moderately restrictive armor.

Another woman, the second mercenary, rounded out the newcomers. Elven, and strongly favoring her race with exceptionally long pointed ears and with a pinkish tinge to her skin I suspect she and I share something in common judging by the number of knives she carried and the way she moved. I counted no less then eleven blades, and those were just the ones I saw. I carry four you'd never realize I had until I went for them, and my clothing doesn't offer as many opportunities for stashing a blade as hers does. It wouldn't surprise me if the final count for her is upwards of twenty. She's attractive, with piercing green eyes and platinum hair, though not so beautiful as Lady Vanderboren. Perhaps my bias is showing here – I've never been very good at judging beauty in other races. I've seen some elven women who looked like they were as thin as a blade, truly ghastly to me, but from what I'm told rather attractive within the elven society. This woman was on the slight side and wore leather armor studded with metal rivets and moved with even more grace then you'd expect from an elf, almost so much that she appeared to be dancing as she walked. Every move offered a mildly suggestive sway to her hips which I'm sure some of the men on the ship appreciated.

I found myself semi involved in their planning and couldn't help but add my own input. Lady Vanderboren's original plan was to run the blockade separately, two chances for someone to get through to the colony at Farshore. She also rationalized that a single ship would have less of a chance of attracting attention then two sailing together. While I understood, and to a point agreed with her original point, the later was a non issue. Sailing in close proximity makes determining if it's two ships or one difficult. Further she ignored the fact that two ships, even if they were spotted, were less likely to be engaged by a loan raider then one, and that together we had a better chance of fighting off an attack.

Achris mentioned the idea of fleeing or shaking off any raiders we encountered. I'm more then a little surprised by how little many of those involved in this expedition know of sailing. I pointed out the problems in that idea – namely how heavily loaded both ships are and thus how low they are in the water – and suggested we pass through together if the blockade was anything like the one from my time. Amella had some colorful words about the back end of my comment, pointing out that some things never change, and certainly not in four years. I accepted the gentle rebuke.

I'm grateful enough that she and the others were even willing to listen to my ideas, many ship captains aren't, especially not from people that have only been on their ship for a handful of days. She seems exceptionally reasonable on the whole. Besides which it simple wasn't worth fighting over. My pride can take the occasional slap, especially when it is warranted and her point was valid. I forget so little time has passed. Four years. Everything has changed so much in so little time.

In my later years at the School of the Dragon many mistook me for meek or weak willed. I'm neither, I just know when to keep my mouth shut. Well usually. At times I can be assertive, but more often then not I'm content to let those who wish to lead lead, while offering the occasional suggestion. Given the current completion for supremacy on the ship between Avner, Heinrick, and the Captain I don't see any need to further complicate the situation. I am however getting very off topic here.

Lady Vanderboren seemed a little shocked by Amella's language and I struggled to keep a smile from my face. Joliet saved us all from anything awkward by interjecting to declare that she would, as a sorceress, protect us from any raiders, confidently declaring she would blow them apart if they attacked us. The mercenaries, particularly the elven woman seemed to find her comments particularly amusing and cracked some jokes at Joliet's expense and at the expense of one of their own back on the Blue Nixie.

I found the comments off color and inappropriate but chose not to comment. Perhaps Lady Vanderboren is more lenient with them then most are with their servants. I did however catch the name of one of the mercenaries number – Liamae the Sorceress – out of the exchange. So each ship has a spellcaster. Interesting, though judging from the disrespect the mercenaries were showing Liamae probably isn't terribly skilled.

Patamon on the other hand showed supreme confidence in Joliet. It seems she has multiple suiters in this expedition, Avner, Patamon, even Skald has soon an interest in her. I don't suppose I can blame them – she truly is so beautiful and her personality, her gentleness is so terribly rare and attractive.

Lady Vanderboren seemed disheartened, perhaps even angry with me, at the shooting down of her plan, but she reluctantly accepted the plan we proposed of traveling together. Trying to mend whatever rift I'd created between us I introduced myself to her – though I suspected Patamon had already informed her of my arrival and circumstance.

We exchanged the expected condolences for our respective loses – my grandfather and her parents. And she inquired as to how I was doing. I replied that everyone on the ship had been exceedingly kind, which seemed to surprise her. I'd love to know why, but I'm not in the habit of prying into other peoples mind's without asking permission or a pressing need. Who had she expected cruelty from? Not Heinrick, the man who loves her I think, nor Joliet who as I've said before doesn't seem to have a mean bone in her. Perhaps Jerard or the Captain? The former is an odd one, but he doesn't seem especially mean. Of course I've had more opportunity to observe him then she has of late, so she may have the wrong impression of him or others. The Captain strikes me as stern, but kind enough.

She did say something that bothered me. No, not just bothered, it angered and upset me. While we were exchanging introductions she mentioned that her mothers journal included a “reference to you and your team abandoning ship”. I don't know why that cut me so deeply. Probably because she was doubtlessly told the details of our betrayal by her man Patamon. Maybe it was a casual slip, or maybe she was slapping me back over the way I picked apart her plan. Or maybe I'm just being oversensitive. Still, it offended me to have her seemingly deflect the blame for what happened to us onto us.

We spoke little after that, briefly bantering about youth and the appropriate time for the death of a loved one, morbid subjects I tried to get off of, before she left to return to the Nixie with the others of her party. All in all I don't know what I think of this woman. Is she petty? I know she was something of a troublemaker in her youth with her brother, which is why she was sent away to school like myself, but I don't remember a mean streak to her. I suppose though that I didn't know her that well to begin with. I'd only met her a handful of times before today and most of what I knew came from stories her parents told of her exploits.

The only other real excitement for the day was our passing of a Brotherhood controlled fort. It uneventfully, we simply sailed out around it. I guess I'm happy for these quiet days.

Journal of Katrina Islaran
In this Year 596

Fate is truly a cruel b*~*~. She delights in tormenting us, taunting us, and betraying us when we least expect it. But I'll never say she isn't good at spreading around her torment. Today her ire fell on another. And that ire favored me.

We knew that running the blockade would be dangerous, but we resolved, as noted earlier, to run it with both ships in close proximity too each other. As we sailed around the horn a scant 50ft. from each other we spotted two caravels within a thousand yards of us. Both made immediately for our expedition, one closing on the Blue Nixie and the other for us. I stood ready on the deck along with several others – Heinrick, the day shift, Mari, Joliet, and Achris. Despite having chased most of the passengers below deck I got nothing more then a few odd looks. I guess they assumed if I was willing to take my chances I was free to do so.

Tavey called out a warning about the closing ships, but it was largely superfluous as we could all see the ships.

Low in the water as both of our ships are with their supplies the two caravels closed quickly, firing ballista as they did. At some point I suggested stretching out the chase as long as possible, but Amella shot the idea down and spun the ship to charge directly at the pirates. The Nixie followed suit and advanced.

I waited for the inevitable magical attack to follow, ready to counter any incoming magic, but it never came. I also waited for Joliet to start her promised magical assault upon our pursuers. For a moment I must admit I doubted her, suspected that she might have over stated her abilities. I said something to the effect of “What do you have for them” to prod her into action and she responded, flinging what I can best describe as an electric fireball at the closing ship. She seemed overcome with emotion as she did, perhaps a side effect of her casting tied to feeling rather then knowledge. It was rather shocking to hear her screaming at them as she attacked them, but I had little time for shock..

The speed with which we closed was surprising even to me. I heard Achris butchering the celestial tongue to cast a spell but didn't see him as I braced myself for the coming crash.

I thought I was ready for anything as I drew my rapier and prepared for battle, but I wasn't ready for what happened next. A being from the past, a being I had expected would take me years to track down, Lars Helvur, appeared on the other ship. He called out something, I can't recall what. In that moment my mind was overcome with fury. Everything disappeared. I reached out to my magic, that magic I hadn't touched since I'd been petrified. I meant to throw a fireball at him, but instead it came out as a thin ray that exploded with a blast of flame that could hardly be described as a fireball. Lars and his shipmates laughed it off for the most part and twisted to avoid the anemic flames. I don't know why the spell functioned so pitifully, whether it was because my emotions got the better of me, because of generally sloppy technique, a mistake on my part, or because it had been so long since I called on my magic I'm not sure, but the result was far less then I'd hoped for. The realization that my magic would be far less effective then I'd hoped snapped me, at least somewhat, back to reality. Cold fury overcame boiling anger.

I must have said something, screamed something at him. I remember my lips shaping words, remember the raw burning as I screamed, but I can't remember what I said. I was so angry all I could think about was his corpse on the deck next to that of his men. I remember the crash of the ships hitting each other. It was as powerful as I expected, but I kept my feet, which is more then I can say of my companions.

The pirates and Lars drew and fired a volley of pistol shot into us, but their aim was as poor as their luck this day. I caught most of them in a spell that left them laid out on the deck of their ship as they prepared to board, but Lars stepped forward and cut into me with his blade, forcing me to give ground. Heinrick and Mari charged for the back end of the ship, where the fighting was taking place, but were trapped beneath the ships rigging as it collapsed on them in a freak accident, leaving Joliet, the captain, and myself were left to face Lars and his fellows.

My pulse was pounding in my ears but I managed to restrain my anger, my blood lust to keep my sense for the moment. I called out, to no one in particular, to kill the downed pirates while they were helpless

Joliet must have continued to focus her spellcasting on the other ship, else wise she was out of major spells and rendered ineffectual. I don't know which. My attention was focused entirely on Lars. I blasted him with flame and he cut into me with his blade. Amella, I think Amella slew one of the two other pirates that my spell left standing but, as I noted, my attention was on Lars. I could hear Achris speaking behind me and without warning a bison appeared on the other ship. Lars, scorced by not slain by my ray of fire made a comment about raping me after he killed me. I later found out just how honest he might have been in his intent. I called back that he was a coward, and that he probably couldn't even get his prick up for a living woman. Not in those words of course, but I've forgotten my exact wording. It was far less tasteful then what is recorded above.

By this time there was only one other pirate left standing. Lars called out to him, demanded he jump into the fight, and he tried to slip past Amella, but she sliced him open from his bellybutton to his hip as he twisted past. He made a feeble swipe at Joliet, but he was obviously distracted by the pain and missed.

I realized that the bison was probably Achris's, the result of a spell, and told him to get it to kill the unconscious men before they came to their senses and joined the fight. We were holding our own but another five pirates in the mix would make things much more complicated. The distraction cost me as Lars seized the opportunity to slice open my shoulder with a two handed blow. I fought to avoid crying out in pain and heard Achris offer an acknowledgment to me.

Amella tried to finish off the pirate that had slipped past her, but missed badly while Achris stepped forward and swung at Lars. The bigger man swept his sword away almost contemptuously. It's obvious that Achris isn't a particularly good swordsman. His bison though proved more effective then he did, goring one of the helpless pirates in the back.

I began to feel light headed from the blood lose – Lars' two swings had cut deep, and stepped back, rendering myself invisible to buy myself a moment to recover. He called shouted an impolite expletive as I did so and his next blow hit only air.

Joliet likewise backed away and invoked a magical shield to protect her. In response Lars swung at Achris and cut him open savagely as the priest was just too slow to block the strike. He writhed in pain by it probably saved him from the remaining pirate as he tumbled past everyone to swing at Achris.

Amella's blade flashed as she slipped it under Lars armpit and into his lungs, decrying him as a “limp dicked halfwit who wrecked her ship.” He obviously felt the blow, but it didn't slow him down. Achris cast another spell as his bison continued to attack the helpless pirates. I took the opportunity to grant everyone supernatural speed with one of my more powerful spells while invisible. Joliet took a more direct approach to attacking Lars and blasted him with magic missiles. He mouthed off something about how she would get her turn with him eventually and she responded that if he thought he would live another minute he was stupider then he was ugly. He yelled that she'd die first and swung at her with a powerful blow that might have killed her had it connected, but the dodged out of the way ably.

The remaining pirate took advantage of our focus on Lars to try and reload his pistol, but I took advantage of my invisibility to impale him on my rapier and kick him to the deck to die.

Meanwhile Lars was rapidly being overwhelmed by the others. He batted aside Amella's blade twice but Achris drew a long cut down his forearm. As he turned to attack Achris he didn't even see the massive bison charge him from behind. It charged and threw him 15 feet in the air then impaled him on its horns as he came down. He went deathly still as he slid off the horns onto the deck. The display rained blood on all of us. He tried to crawl along the deck for a moment, cursing us as his breath came in ragged gasps – apparently Amella's earlier thrust under his arm was catching up with him finally.

I couldn't stand it. My blood boiled with very breath he took. I dropped my rapier and went for a dagger, jumping on him, stabbing him. His blood covered my hand. Something was happening in my peripheral vision, a ship pulled along side, but I didn't pay it mind. The man who had killed the most important man in my life, who had killed my friends, and who had nearly assured my death was in my grasp. I watched my blade enter his flesh time after time. Everything else disappeared. And then I was picking myself up off the deck, my ears – seemingly deaf to the world a moment before – ringing. I looked around and found most of crew face down on the deck, including the captain, while Joliet and Achris were picking themselves up off the deck like myself. The deck was wrecked.

Joliet was calling out to the other ship – a bone white galley made entirely of bone loaded with ballista, catapults, and cannons, and flying a purple flag with a skill imposed on a five pointed star, asking them to stop their attack.

The apparent commander of the galley called back, claimed we insulted him by trying to steal his prize. Joliet changed her pleas for peace to a request to join their crew instead of death. Coward. Still, I had a sinking feeling in my stomach that I knew what he wanted and why he'd attacked. I called over, asked him what prize we tried to claim, while Achris wondered aloud if he wanted the other pirates. I don't think he's that bright – Achris that is.

The commander of the ship, a well dressed skeleton with glowing red eyes, took a step forward and was suddenly right in front of me. His voice was low an rasping, commanding and a little condescending. I can remember his next words perfectly, as if he were here saying them to me right now,

“Why, th' life blood that ye have running down yer fingers, Missy. That you had the temerity t'try n' take before my very eyes.” He turned for a moment and addressed Achris as almost an afterthought, but again his words stuck in my mind, “The other pirates, priest o' magic? Nay. Only th' one tha' had a bargain with ol' Malagon.”

My chest heaved, both in rage and in exertion as I gasped for air. I felt as if the wind had just been yanked out of me. I look at the skeleton, the self identified Malagon, and appraised him. I knew I was in no condition to fight. Between the wounds I'd taken from Lars, the amount of magic I'd early used – and it seeming unreliability at the moment – and the beating I'd taken from whatever they blasted us with I'm surprised I could stand. Still I summoned the defiance to growl out “You want Lars Helvur” as if it were an accusation.

I guess it was mostly will, because I stood before the skeleton as confident as I ever have and stared him down. I think he knew I was bluffing, he knew I wasn't in any condition to fight him over Lars, but he gave me my moment and let me keep my pride, or maybe gave me the moment to cool off, regain my poise. His response was equally gracious, perhaps more so then I deserved, “Only want what's mine Missy. By a far older and stronger claim then ye have.”

It was then it began to dawn on me, even more then it had already, just how outmatched I was by this being before me. This was the kind of being legends are written about on the seas. A pact maker on the seas of tremendous power. I asked, with much more temerity then I had previously how he knew of my claim on Lars.

Again, his response stuck with me. I wonder if I'll forget any word he said in that meeting. For now they're burned into my mind like much of what I saw and heard that day. “I know much, Missy. More about ol' Lars Helvur than Lars Helvur knows. 'E may not remember four fools abandoned in th' jungle, but I remember.”

Achris ordered his bull to attack the stunned pirates by the skeleton before me glared at it and banished it back to it's native plane without a gesture and with hardly a word.

The details of what happened over the next few minutes, exactly what was said, are largely unimportant and won't be related here in the interest of brevity. Suffice it to say that I made a pact with Malagon, despite Joliets repeated and somewhat inhibitory outbursts, giving him Lars – who he could have easily taken by force – in exchange for one favor at any point in the future lasting a single battle or hour. The skeleton proved surprisingly reasonable and related that while attempting to satisfy such a pact he could appear anywhere in the seven seas in moments.

He said that he would be taking Lars alive, but not that he was protecting him, merely that he was collecting the return on his investment. Achris in the meantime beat the remaining four pirates uncontentious and saw to the captain's woulds at my direction.

I tried to offer Malagon the four remaining pirates as an apology for my actions, and to relieve us from the trouble of arranging how to dispose of them, but he showed no interest in doing so. He related his name, and delcared that all we had to do to call upon his assistance was yell forth his name, “Malagon Bone Lord.”

Disconcertinly when we shook his hand to accept the bargin, myself, Joliet, and Achris, a flash of black smoke went up. I wonder what devil I've made a deal with, but the deal is done. I have no intention of calling on his assistance for anything short of imminent death, and perhaps not even then.

He asked that I physically give him Lars, and I did so. I found myself both curious about and dreading what would happen next. As I went to hand the bastard over he stirred, regaining consciousness. The moment he saw Malagon he begged that I not hand him over, screamed, and called upon the gods for help. I could summon no pity for him in that moment and I find that I can't even do so now, even knowing the fate that awaited him.

I shoved him into Malagon's arms and the skeleton plunged his claws into the big man's chest, grabbed his spinal cord, and ripped his entire skeleton free the flesh that held it. My stomach churned at the display as his flesh fell like a pile of wet clothing onto the deck. The stench... it wasn't indescribable, I've smelled most parts of the human body – both the parts outside the skin and those inside – before, but its aways awful when the stench from someone's guts and bowels fills the air. The skeleton of the man who had once been Lars Helvur stood rigid at attention next to Malagon, even as the spirit of the man rose from the skin to cast an accusing gaze on me. Malagon took the spirit and declared that it was coming with him, before dragging then both back to his ship. Once on board it's skeleton crew began rowing and the ship swiftly faded from sight.

What did I condemn his soul to? I don't know, but I know judging from his reaction it cannot have been pleasant. I felt dirty, utterly unclean, and I didn't stop shaking for some time thereafter. I still haven't stopped shaking on the inside. It didn't stop me from acting, but I've never been so terrified, not even as a child.

I issued orders to the remaining crew to secure the pirates as prisoners, asked Achris to return the captain to her quarters to rest – I confess I didn't want her butting into the situation immediately, and went to try and help Tavey lift the fallen beam off Heinrick and Mari. I turned though to Achris and Joliet, realizing I should tell them what seemed obvious in my mind. I all but ordered them never to call upon Malagon. Given their reckless actions and words while the being was aboard I think that's the best option. I then headed to help Tavey, but along the way I saw Yestl lying face down in a puddle of blood near the ballista and changed my course, hoping I hadn't gotten the poor man killed. He was alive, barely. Two potions of healing were not enough to restore him to consciousness, though they did stabilize him.

I ordered Jaxr to help Tavy with the beam, but he seemed too dazed to respond. Achris seemed to be ignoring me as he channeled the power of his god to restore injuries. I appreciated the result, but not his blatant disregard for everything I said. The man isn't that bright. As a result the captain stirred. I'd hoped not to wake her until the situation was under control, but there is no use crying over lost coins.

Achris and Jaxr finally saw to the beam as the Captain regained her feet and started snapping out orders, demanding that Achris restore Mari to consciousness and that I give her a sitrep.

I did so, relating that thus far it seemed all our people survived, that the ship was badly damaged but that I wasn't sure how badly, and that the Nixie had seemingly survived her own battle. Indeed, the ship was on it's way toward us.

I noticed the pirates were still not secured, even minutes after I'd asked someone see to them, so I did so myself, hog tying them face down on the deck and asking Jaxr to look after them. I also picked out the seemingly useful items from Lars's “corpse” before kicking the sack of flesh overboard. I couldn't stand to look at it anymore.

I headed over to the ship formerly belonging to the pirate Lars Helvur to search for any additional combatants, any prisoners on the ship, or anything that might be of use, trusting the Captain to take care of her own ship.

On Lars's ship, Purity's Prow's I found nothing else alive. There were three corpses in the ships hold, young woman, starved, obviously beaten, and clearly raped repeatedly before they met there end. In spite of all I'd seen alright I had to fight back tears when I stumbled across their bodies. One of them even seemed to have been eaten on in her upper thigh. Also in the hold were less then 1,500 coins – mostly copper and silver, and a handful of gems and other items worth at best a few gold pieces.

It explained the cause of their desperate attack on the Sea Wyvern, even when it became obvious that the ship had several spellcasters on it. Such a pitiful take would have surely resulted in their end in the slave pits of Narisban when they returned to port. They were all but out of food. I left the ship mostly undisturbed, though I did stop by the captains quarters to pocket the ships log.

I returned to the Sea Wyvern angrier then I'd been when I left. All the prisoners were unconscious, so questioning them was out for the moment, so instead I sought out Mari. I didn't know much about her, other then that she was a priestess of the pirate goddess and a terrifying woman, but I figured if anyone would be able to give the women from the Purity's Prow's a proper burial at sea it would be her.

She proved... remarkably approachable. When I told her of the women and the way in which they met there end she proved more then happy to assist me with questioning the prisoners we'd taken, and agreed to pray for the dead women and help send them on to the next life. She and I... I think we share a similar sense of justice in many ways. When she learned of the womens death and the manner in which they met it she took on a coldness that I could agree with.

Unfortunately the prisoner that awoke most readily proved decidedly unhelpful. He claimed to be a man simply working for 'honest work' but neither of us was swayed by his denials. He didn't have the dead women's names, nor did he know anything about Malagon.

Afterwards Mari and I spoke for a few moments as I tried to get a feel for the woman. I'd heard little about her, save that she was supposedly intimidating as hell – which hasn't proven to be the case for me, and that she and the recently deceased Arien had some sort of relationship. I mentioned that I hadn't wanted to intrude on her grief as an excuse for my rudeness in not introducing myself. It was true in part, though not completely honest. She seemed surprised I'd heard and melancholy when the subject came up. Then she mentioned something terribly cruel, that one day she would be powerful enough to return her Arien from the grave.

I don't think she did it to be cruel, I know she didn't. We all have our own way of dealing with grief and if that is her's then I can't blame her, but it reopened a wound I was trying to close – Keil. He died in the same way as Arien. I hadn't thought about the possibility of resurrecting him. Such magic is not only divine instead of arcane, but also incredibly powerful and rare. So few priests and priestess are granted such spells by their gods that it is all but ignored as a possibility. I'd certainly ignored the possibility. I was trying to put Keil behind me, move forward in my life. She reopened that door with that little statement. What if I could bring him back to life? What if I could see his smile again? What if?

I left trying to fight tears.

By the time I'd composed myself enough to present myself in public again repairs were underway on the ship, under Amella's watchful eye. The Nixie had come and gone, offering assistance and appreciation for Joliet's efforts on their behalf in the fight. Joliet was hard at work repairing the ship as she could with her spells. I knew what spell she was using, and given a day or so I could make use of it myself, but by that time it's use in the repairs would be mostly expended. Instead of jumping into the repairs at and at the captain's request I went below to see if the passengers would contribute to the repairs.

I found most of them together and was able to rally most of them to the ships aid. A few looked to Avner, seemingly weighing his opinion on the matter, but he seemed to offer his approval and they headed above decks to help with the repairs. Avner approached me afterward with complements for me, concerns for Joliet's safety, and concerns about Achris's competence.

I thanked him for his complements and returned them in turn, assured him that Joliet would be fine, but couldn't bring myself to gloss over his concerns about Achris given the man's performance earlier. I assured him that I understood his concerns about Achris, and that I was even relieved that he would be staying below to keep an eye on the inept priest.

He also raised a complaint about not being allowed to join the fight. I told him I'd make sure it didn't happen in the future. I really can understand his frustration, no one likes being treated like a glass flower.

The rest of the day passed quickly, working on the repairs for the ship to try and get it underway. When I finally found my bed I was all too ready to embrace sleep, but forced myself to abstain. To read the Purity's Prow's log, and to record the day's events here.

The log held little of value. Lars was a sloppy record keeper. It mentions his mutiny on the Purity's Prow's that placed him in command of the ship, with the assistance of a gnome named Shortstone Badgewell.

It goes on to detail an attack on a ship called the Widowmaker by Lars and two other captains – Fargus Ironfoot and Morgan Baumann. The attack went well, but Shortstone Badgewell betrayed Lars and sided with the other ships. They split up the majority of the booty and left Lars with the three women I found in the hold. Badgewell then left on the Widowmaker.

The log ends with a note that Lars was getting hungry enough to eat one of the women – no doubt he's the source of cannibalism to the one womans leg. I was saddened to learn that the log didn't hold the womens names. I can only hope one of our other prisoners had the decency to learn their names. It seems cruel to bury them without a name to be forgotten.

[Katrina Islaran]

Journal of Katrina Islaran
In this Year 596

We buried the women today after forcing the surviving pirates to walk the plank. They were a pitiful sight, begging and pleading for their lives. Even knowing what they've done, what they did, it still cut at me. I got into an argument with Heinrick and Mari about their execution - and lady Vanderboren's refusal to give the order for it. I fear I'm rapidly alienating everyone on the ship.

The women got a proper burial at sea - conducted by our very own priestess of the pirate goddess. The irony of it all. As we laid them to rest my conscience compelled me to speak out. In hindsight it may have been rash - but the words I spoke were necessary enough. The women died - everyone else from their ship died - purely because the other powers of the region refuse to muster the political will to break the damned Scarlet Brotherhood blockade. If it's the last thing I do I'll see it done, and the pirates directly responsible for this atrocity brought to swift justice.

After we'd put the women to their final rest in the icy waters of the sea the Captain approached me and asked - dare I say ordered - that I join her in her quarters within the hour. She had... an unusual look on her face and an unusual tone. She had looked as if to say something when I'd made my - again - perhaps foolish speech. I fully expected to be reprimanded by her, but I couldn't bring myself to move from where I stood for some time.

The dead women kept coming back to me. Beyond the horror that was their deaths and the violent events that marked them and the time immediately before one thought pulsed in my mind, refusing to leave. It could have been me. I wasn't all that different from those women - I'm still not. If the Islaran's hadn't taken me in I would have almost certainly ended up on a ship at some point. Even still, it wasn't the thought of dying, of rape even, that terrified me. It was the thought of dying without a purpose - meaninglessly, namelessly.

What must it be like to know that no one will mark your passage, or even your existence on this world? That when you are gone you will leave no legacy? Maybe that's why I did what I did, said what I said. The question them becomes did I do it to give them a legacy, or for myself?

When I finally tore myself away from the dark sea night had fallen. Mari stood at the helm and a light burned in the Captain's quarters. I entered with a knock and she told me to take a seat. She took a swig of some strong liqueur and against my better judgment I took the bottle when she offered it. It was sharply acidic. I've never been a strong drinker and this was harsher then anything I was used to. I struggled to keep it down and avoid coughing all over myself.

Her next words were rather surprising. She asked where I'd heard 'the name'. Somewhat guardedly I asked what name she meant. Her response held more anger and venom then I would have ever expected from her 'the blood gnome!'. Amella... is a woman of strong will and a sharp tongue. She has been in my experience quick to snap at people, but true anger, the rage that was evident on her face tonight is not something I've seen. Maybe it was the strong drink - I know it loosened my own inhibitions later.

I tried to keep my voice even and calm as I explained his note in the log of the Purity's Prow's. As I did her face fought between rage and composure, but composure won out before I finished speaking. She told me of her involvement with him - he had murdered her husband. She was also kind enough to illuminate the history of the other pirates named in the log - Ironfoot and Baumann. We spoke for a while longer thereafter, sharing the bottle of whatever foulness she had. We talked of fate - of my belief in it and her lack thereof. And we spoke of revenge - and her desire for it. I could understand it. The bitter sweetness of Lar's death still filled my mouth and soul. It didn't warm me, didn't make me happy, but it left me no more empty inside then I was before. At least now I didn't carry that extra burden - the knowledge that the scum still walked free while too many good men were dead.

By the time I left her cabin I was as drunk as I'd ever been - which no doubt helped me get into the argument that followed with Mari. I don't know why I approached her but I did. What followed was an argument too lengthy to record that touched on everything from the nobility, her mother's rape, the current state of Shadowshore, piracy, the Merravanchis, and my past. Regrettably, my past. In my drunken rage I spewed things I never should have to her, told her thing's I've never told anyone about me. When I realized abruptly what I was doing, and the sheer lunacy of it I could barely muster goodbye before I hastily beat feet below decks. She had a damn smug look on her face as I did.

I was ready to kill myself over the shame of having done something so stupid.

* * *

While sailing near the coast we rounded the bend to find a massive spider web before us extending for miles down the coast. I recognized it as the work of monstrous spiders - bugs to large to believe until we got to see them up close when a number of them jumped on the ship. The ensuing battle was short but fierce as we carved them up with sword and spell. Heinrick was badly injured in the fighting, but it seems he'll recover. The man is... absurdly brave, tough, and strong. In many ways he reminds me of Kiel.

The cabin boy, Tavey, seemed infatuated with the alchemists fire I used on the smaller spiders.

Afterwords one of the passengers - the elven man, Damri, made several slices of the spiders into steaks which proved surprisingly tasty. I have a policy of always trying anything once. This time it worked out in my favor. The fine meal was interrupted when while the others were telling me about a saboteur they'd defeated on the ship one of the passengers tried to stab Heinrick with a fork. The imagery was absurd enough on it's face - the man must weigh over 250lb and is built like an ogre, but the smaller man was determined. He raged about how Heinrick had killed the women he loved - the saboteur in question - and how he would have his revenge. I can't help but pity the poor man - Renor. Even if she was a monster, a poisoner, a murderer (of Heinrick's brother even!), and a manipulative b~#+% if all the stories are to be believed, he obviously loved her. That's a lose I don't wish on anyone. I never did catch her name though...

* * *

We stopped at the Xatalati river to refresh our water stores. The clear cool fresh water was all the invitation I needed to jump into the river. There is something cleansing about bathing. I'd long wiped the blood and grim of the pirate and spider attacks from me - cleaned it magically even - but I didn't feel truly clean until I got in the water. I swam around for a while and found what I thought was a fairly secluded spot away from prying eyes to truly bath in. It turns out I was wrong though I didn't find that out only a few minutes ago. I think you can still see my ears burning. Again - I can't help but laugh at my own hypocrisy. There was a time I would have thought nothing of it but... I guess it just isn't appropriate now. The sight of a lady's bare flesh should be reserved for herself and her husband - or so it has been beaten into me.

Eventually I enticed Mera into a bath as well and was able to get some information out of her on the rest of the crew - and on herself. She's a former smuggler who owes Heinrick and his former companions her life. She was also able to illuminate Amella's past as a smuggler. It's funny that as a noble I'm both bound to scorn and bound to accept smuggling. I tried to keep my responses even. The captain declined the invitation for a bath - apparently she's a salty dog to her core and actually enjoys bathing in salt water - but Mari went down to bath later at my suggestion after pointing out my 'secluded' spot wasn't as secluded as I believed. Apparently half the crew saw Mera and I. I think she took pleasure in rubbing that in - if she didn't make the entire thing up. She seemed to have no objection herself to others seeing her. The woman is... confidence incarnate. And b@&@! incarnate. I can't figure out of I like her or hate her.

Joliet seemed to show surprise as the very concept of a bath - apparently she's become entirely reliant on her magic for such purposes. A sorceress to the core that one. I guess it's different then wizardry like that. Magic always feels like a chore for me. They said I was talented at the House of the Dragon, but it never felt that way. I just worked harder then everyone else. I don't know how many nights I spent up studying theory beneath my sheets.

* * *

Heinrick asked me to identify a magical dagger he has in his possession today. It was no large thing, so I did so. Also of interest I finally got Skald talking today. The man is... I fear him sick in the mind. He found it amusing to joke about how I was only now 'finishing the journey I started 4 years ago' and about his status as a 'wanted criminal'. He claims to be from Styes and to have worked for a man identified as Boss Rashlen. As he fled the town more then a year ago he burned down a warehouse fill of illegal drugs owned by this Boss Rashlen, who took it personally and sent assassins after him. I suppose that's as good a reason as any to flee to the end of the known world.

* * *

Fort Greenrock is gone, just gone. We came upon it's burn out ruins today, the apparent result of a Reptite attack on a massive scale months ago. There were no survivors we could find and no supplies to be salvaged. There was however a clawed beast with exceptional speed that attacked us from the jungle. Heinrick cut it badly and it fled into the woods. I hope the dumb beast didn't take long to die alone in the jungle. We still have some supplies - enough to last us until the next stop on our journey - the village of Renkrue.

While it doesn't impact us as heavily as others this is truly ill news for Sasserine. It was one of the few friendly ports one could resupply at on this end of the world. I guess eventually we need to get word back to the city, though I'm not sure how.

* * *

We got a rude surprise at the Atikula River when we stopped to fill our water barrels. It was in part my fault I guess - I should have noticed how still the natural harbor was, how quiet it was. Carelessness. I've had more then enough of that lately. This time it nearly got Heinrick killed.

I didn't see the seven headed hydra creeping up on us in the water as we worked on the beach until the last second and was barely able to get a spell off. It went off poorly in my haste and the beast avoided my attempt to blind it as it surged ashore and tore into Heinrick and myself with it's many heads. Jo managed to avoid the two that went after her, but one of the two after me caught my back as I twisted to avoid the first, and Heinrick had one bite through his armor - though the steel saved him from the other three.

My second attempt to blind it was more successful, but it's maws still closed on Heinrick standing before it as it was and the two previously snapping at me once more connected, slicing open my arm.

Joliet and I both rained rays of fire on the beast, but they proved largely ineffective and she switched to rays of what I can only guess were necromantic energy. I never had a taste for necromancy so I can't be sure.

As Heinrick continued to swing ineffectually at the surprisingly graceful creature it snapped back with similar ineffecintcy in it's blindness - at him anyway. Three of the heads boxed me in and we able to scent me. I hadn't realized how acute their sense of smell is and two of the heads snatched me from the ground in sequence and tore into me. Only my protective field saved me from certain death as the monster tore long and wide, but shallow, gashes along my back, chest, and hip. I screamed in agony but landed on my feet when it dropped me. I guess some reflexes don't fade with time.

Joliet swapped to the lightning blasts she's so fond of as I empowered all of us with speed. The monster responded poorly to her blast and charged her, leaving itself exposed to both Heinrick and myself as we sliced and blasted holes in it respectively. It snapped at everyone in blind fury but only grazed my arm and Jo's leg.

Then Heinrick came literally hacking through the creatures flank out through it's chest, covered in gore. The monster fell over dead as the rest of us stared in shock at the gore soaked fighter.

Heinrick jumped into the water to clean himself off as I tentatively felt at my wounds. I'm sure I looked like hell, but obviously I was mostly alright.

Heinrick started joking that the fight was invigorating and when the other rowboat approached with Mari and Jaxr Joliet joked macabre that we were all dead. I'm beginning to wonder if anyone on the ship is sane. If I were insane would I know it, or would everyone else appear insane to me?

Mari patched us up, calling upon her goddess. I tried not to think about the fact that I was relying upon a pirate goddess for healing after swearing to slay as many pirates as I can in my lifetime. I guess the irony amused her though because the healing worked and I watched my wounds close like they had never been there. I'm grateful for it - it would be unbecoming to bare scars like that.

It wasn't until we heard rustling in the jungle coming toward us and Skald popped out that we realized he was missing. He claimed to have found a dragon's cave and held up gold coins to prove it. I was a little nervous about the thought of stealing from a dragon, but the others seemed excited by the idea.

He passed Joliet a platinum necklace with a emerald pendant and she practically squealed in delight. The others seemed occupied with the thought of the dragon's cave, and treasure, but I was able to convince them to help me check out the bottom of the lagoon first. Beneath the water were dozens of sunken ships. We all split off to look into various wrecks and the first one I entered held a horrific sight. Bloated bodies floated in the hold, trapped in the ships concave belly and rotting, their flesh peeling off in the water. I choked back vomit and swam for the surface as fast as I could. It took me a moment to regain my composure, and by then Heinrick had surfaced. I suggested we check out the cave everyone on the shore seemed to eager to examine, then come back to look at the ships below us, as that task could take hours (and later did).

We waited for several minutes for Mari to surface, and when she didn't Heinrick went down to look for her as I headed toward the shore. Right around the time I was wringing the water out of my clothing they resurfaced, Mari trailing scarlet in the water from a number of cuts and carrying a blade of an odd metal.

As it turns out, Mari had been attacked by Sahuagin in her wreck and barely escaped, though she slew three of the five. I was concerned that they could be a scouting party for a larger force, and that we should warn the ships, but my concerns were waved off and in short order we headed for the 'Dragon's' cave.

It quickly became clear that something was amiss. Even now I don't understand what happened exactly that day, what force we were dealing with, but something was playing with us. Skald led us deeper and deeper into the island, miles. It didn't mesh with his claim that he found the cave while relieving himself. Eventually he led us to the cave, it's opening overgrown and dark.

At the same time Joliet's attitude... changed. She became bitter. Cold and angry. At the cave I suggested Skald check it out first - to be honest I was beginning to suspect he was a shape shifter or enchanted somehow. He agreed and we agreed to follow him if we didn't hear from him in some time. During the wait I approached Heinrick alone to ask if he had noticed the discrepancies I had in Skald's story and Jo's behavior - and he noted that he had.

Time passed and Skald didn't reemerge. We resolved to go in after him. After Heinrick nearly broke his neck in a pit trap I took the lead. We passed several other sprung traps, and I got careless. I missed the telltale sign of a scythe trap until the second it sprang. I was dead, just dead, until Jaxr slammed into me from behind. The blade sliced me open across my shoulder blades and I felt the wound burn with poison. Mari had nothing available to cleanse the poison, but she closed the wound and I quaffed a potion to help fight the poison. A few minutes later we were ready to move - though I was much worse for the wear.

We were nearly at the bottom of the cave - which descended almost a quarter mile. We came to an opening into a much larger cave. Inside were piles, literally piles of gold coins, weapons, armor, clothing of every kind, gems, and trinkets of I'd have to guess were magical. And a petrified Skald.

I panicked. I won't deny it. I panicked. I pushed my way past everyone back into the passage before I sank against the wall literally shaking. I distantly remember Heinrick asking me if a dragon could petrify someone, and answering though I remember his words and mine as if they were background noise.

Heinrick darted out into the cavern to grab Skald I turned to watch him, expecting the worst, and didn't see a woman creep up behind us. She was startlingly beautiful, dressed in a green gown with her hair bound in a green scarf. And she toyed with us. I asked her what she had done to Skald and her response was... unhelpful, saying only that she hadn't petrified him. She claimed to know an Aaron Islaran and made a sinister comment about how she was sorry he had been too late to save his sister.

She identified herself as a Lady Mabaline Thusa, though she asked we address her as Lady May Thusa. I never got a read on her and bounced in theories as to her identity between gorgona, dragon, and sorceress. She poked fun at all the theories in turn and even went so far as to assume the form of a gorgona for a moment in her mirth.

She delighted in mocking us and dropping ambiguous comments - like that we had certainly run into a dragon in recent weeks. She seemed to take particular pleasure in taunting me - scaring me. Heinrick was trying to charm her I think, and she seemed quite taken with him on the surface, though she later claimed she was married. She claimed she was in the process of moving - with her husband.

The conversation shifted to the hydra and the Sahuagin - though she pleaded ignorance about the former and anger at the later, asking us what they were doing on 'her lands'.

Finally the conversation turned to our destination. I... told her. if she is as powerful as I think she is lying would have been pointless. After picking apart the spell that harmed Skald I have to conclude she is if nothing else an exceptionally potent spell weaver - more on that later.

She claimed to have a cousin on the Isle of Dread, one Lady Xiure, and asked that we pass on a ring to her along with a boast - that her hair was prettier then Xiure's. The more I think about the encounter in hindsight the more certain I am she was a gorgana - if an exceptionally powerful one. Her focus on her hair and the way she turned away before assuming the gorgana form - ostentatiously to spare us her gaze - rings together as more likely then the other possibilities.

Then she offered us our pick of items from the literal horde of treasure. I was skeptical at first - but in the end thought it better not to offer her insult. If she was trying to hurt or track us there were easier ways. I found myself drawn to a blue robe set with several blue gemstones. It seemed... to almost have depth in the fabric and I could almost see things moving in it. I don't know how to better describe it.

Investigation since has shown it to be a potent magical artifact indeed. It actually has a connection to the other planes - seemingly all of them at once. By sending arcane power through the robe I've been able to summon up all manner of beings with incredible speed compared to a usual summoning spell. It has it's limitations, but it is still remarkably useful.

Others chose their own 'gifts' while Jaxr loaded up a bag with coins to split with the other crew members the Captain had refused to allow to join us. He's a good man even if he is a bit... forward. He's made no secret of his intent - or at least leanings. I can't really bring myself to crush his hopes - though it feels cruel to lead him on. I have to admit - part of me likes the attention.

Heinrick asked before we left what kind of dragon he had encountered. May Thusa's answer was as cryptic as everything else - Aussirdarastrixaesthyr. As we left she began casting spells loading the collected wealth - more then I could have imagined - into chests and bags for transport. I gulped as we left and didn't stop shaking until we were out of the cave.

Outside the others began asking about relieving Skald from his condition.

To the spell that held Skald. I could - and likely will - write a thesis about it. I've never been one for enchantment magic - like necromancy I find it abhorrent - but this was... such a complex effect I don't know where to begin. I don't think I would have ever begun to figure out parts of it without Lady May Thusa's hints and outright statements about it - like that Skald merely thought he was a statue. It makes me wonder as to the power of the mind - if belief can do such as it did. It didn't turn him to stone, but it made his mind believe he was stone - thus petrifying him mentally and physically. It was so powerful a compulsion that it actually made him weigh as if he were stone.

My immediate attempts to break the spell holding him failed and we - by which I mean Heinrick - had to carry him back to the harbor, where we found the Jade Raven's filling the Blue Nixie's water supplies. They got into a huff when they heard about Lady May Thusa, but things settled down eventually. Liamae, their sorceress started asking questions about magic and how I'd blocked the Gorgana's gaze. It was almost a let down having to tell her that we didn't actually fight her.

We started diving in the harbor before long to recover what we could from the ships. Of particular interest to me were the nameplates so we could record them as ships truly lost and accounted for. Jaxr and Mari seemed to agree with that idea. The others showed some concern about me diving with the poison still coursing through my veins, but I was able to beg off their concerns with assurances that if I felt worse I'd stop. I was somewhat surprised by Mari's concern. In hindsight I wish I had listened to them. We recovered some armor, silver and gold, and the nameplates for the Scarlet Starfish, Baleful Outburst, Seaspray, Talon of Tiamat and the Cylondria Ripper.

By the time we finished I exhausted, cold, and wet. I could barely stand and actually needed Mari's help to get to the rowboat. From the moment I got into the boat I don't remember much else. When I woke up though I wasn't in my own bed, much less my own room. Mera was dressing for her shift - which lead me to believe I was in the room she shared with Mari.

She made an off hand comment about Mari and I 'going at it pretty hard last night' that left me pink in the cheeks, but it seems nothing actually happened - at least according to Mari. I pushed the thought out of my head and snick into the passenger cabin where most of the others were still asleep for my spellbook, taking advantage of Mari's cabin to prepare spells in peace. When I headed back for the deck I found Heinrick in the middle of his morning 'workout' as it were.

I guess it explains something of why the man is as big as a horse and twice as strong that he is as committed to physical fitness as he is, but I was shocked he was running around as he was after a day like the one before. He tried to convince me to join him but I begged out. Then... something odd happened. Yestl for whatever reason walked by and gave me an exaggerated thumbs up. Heinrick claimed it was probably because he and Mera 'got together' the night before. I hate it when I can't remember things. Lirith showed up to spar with Heinrick shortly thereafter. He gave me a pained look but I left him to writhe for a while in favor of thanking Mari for the use of her bunk... and questioning her about the night before.

She responded that she had no idea what would cause Yestl to give me a thumbs up, that nothing had happened - which was moderately reassuring - and that I shouldn't get used to her bed while making not so subtle comments that she would be open to something happening between us. She was kind enough to heal the effects of the poison before we broke off. I headed to the hold to check on the 'plunder' from the day before. The armor was enchanted, as was the cloak attached to it. I came back up and related as much to Heinrick as he awkwardly tried to get out of touching Lirith. Feeling sorry for the poor oaf (and I use the term lovingly) I saved him the trouble and gave her a hand with her armor.

I tried to drop the hint that he wasn't comfortable running his hands over her or with her advances on the whole because of his relationship with Lady Vanderboren, but she seemed to write them off and joke about it. Heinrick took the opportunity to challenge me to another sparring session - which I politely declined. The conversation didn't get any further then that before Amella emerged from her cabin and began frothing at the mouth over the seven hydra skulls on the deck and Skald's statue form.

Apparently Kiel - the dwarf member of the Jade Ravens saw fit to grace us with seven hydra skulls in the night. Amella was not amused, but before long Heinrick, Jaxr, and Yestl were carrying them below while I tried to explain what had happened to Skald. On the whole I think the others got the better deal - laughing and joking as they carried the skulls down to the hold, while I get to deal with Amella's displeasure in full force.

Mari and I discussed possible solutions to Skald's situation - with Heinrick chiming in unhelpfully near the end of the conversation. She has a very colorful way of addressing her goddess - quite unlike anything I'd expect in a priestess, before she headed off to bed.

* * *

We were able to free Skald from his binding with a combination of spells. He didn't exactly react the way I expected him to, falling to the ground and screaming. Joliet made no move to help him, so I got to my knees to try and comfort him. It took a while to get him calmed down. He was ranting about how Medusa was in his mind and how he wanted to die. The later made me rather cross with him trying to get my point across. Death is not the answer - it's no good way out.

Afterward Mari and I discussed the spell that had held him and our improvised solution while Heinrick tried to council Joliet for... whatever her problem was. Before long our conversation turned to Besmara and Mari was so kind as to share her plan to murder her goddess and take her place - with my help of course. I was skeptical to say the least. It's not every day you get signed up to murder a goddess or - as she said - press ganged into it.

We were fully embroiled in that conversation when Joliet stormed over and promptly declared that she would kill Mari if she tried to lay a hand on her. I think Mari and I both nearly fell over, but Mari gathered power in her hands for a magical strike. She calmed down as Joliet stomped away while Mari and I both turned our gaze to Heinrick. According to him Joliet came to believe the only way to get respect was by acting like a 'b#*%@'. Mari seemed to take some mild offense to being described as such, but I'm not sure how much of it was real anger and how much of it was just teasing him. None the less the brief argument that spawned was amusing and included such highlights as 'What the hell does abrasive even mean, you pointy eared brute' and ''Yeah, you might have a point. A small one, which matches the mind that made it' along with such magnificent retreats as 'I actually admire someone who speaks her mind'. In spite of the absurdity that spawned it I couldn't help but laugh at the argument. I didn't laugh at what Heinrick said next.

He claims Joliet mistook my offer to join the rest of the girls bathing and Mari's flirtations as, I can't believe I'm saying this, a plan to rape her. Mari seemed more appalled then anyone else at the idea - and at the thought that someone would think her capable of it. She mentioned before her mother was raped - I have to wonder if Mari was the product of that rape or if she suffered it herself. Or both. She wasn't ready to share and we didn't press her on it as she headed to bed.

* * *

I... I just want to die. I'm not only a failure at everything, I one again came so close to killing everyone around me in my arrogance and carelessness. How do I go on after what happened that night? How can I look anyone else in the eye? How can I look myself in the mirror.

[Peter Stewart]

(Note: I got locked out of editing the first thread and apparently the second half the what was posted got cut off in the post, hence I've started a new thread. If anyone could delete the old one I'd appreciate it)

Such is the Journal of Katrina Islaran to this point - starting during the Sea Wyvern's Wake and still on it. She came in to replace my last PC, the Elf Wizard Arien when he was stoned in in Tamoachan by the Ghost Basilisk and crushed by falling rocks.

She's currently still on the Sea Wyvern - we've taken SWW pretty slowly overall, having just finished the storm and subsequent pirate attack on us (a truly savage battle, though that's a couple entries away). The game on the whole has been heavy on the roleplay, with complex relationships between many of the PCs and NPCs.

As you might guess from the last line of the journal the events in Renkure went way off script, due to foolish actions on the part of two PC's. The resulting clusterfrak left Katrina (Kat) Islaran mentally and physically scared (the former more then the later). We'll get to that soon enough - it's an interesting story.

There are all kinds of things going on in the background of the game not posted here because Kat isn't aware of them, so don't take this as a pure distillation of the campaign thus far. Interesting notes include the fact that Heinrick is the only member of the original party that went through TiNH left alive. The gnome cleric got ambushed and killed, the halfling thief got his head stomped in on parrot island by a zombie, the human fighter got killed by the guardians of Lavinia's vault, and the elven wizard got killed by Roweyn during their raid on the Lotus lair.

Subsequently we've lost a human rogue, a half-orc druid, another human rogue, a half-elf ranger, a human paladin, a half-orc barbarian, a human fighter (Retired while the getting was good), another elven wizard, and a half-elf sorceress (Retired to NPC status).

One small request to those who leave comments - no spoilers on the Campaign. I'm rather enjoying not knowing that much about what will happen next.

The current party through this point of the story is

Heinrick - Half Elf Fighter
Joliet - Half Elf Sorceress
Katrina - Human Rogue/Wizard

Oh, and one final thing for those wondering as to the fair Kat's appearance Link to Picture