The sauce was an old recipe he
had discovered inside a jeweled urn in
a ruined temple in the Malaysian jungle.
Narrowly beating out the renowned jungle explorer
Springfield Slim, scholar, archaeologist, and lady's man.
NaKika and Slim decided to team up
for a road trip down to the
land down under. It was there that
they encountered a dire kangorpion, a dangerous
predator with a stinger full of poison,
and a heart filled with love and
a pouch filled filled to the brim with
adult novelties. Petey was his name and
Endless Quest in search of that most
elusive creature; Bobby's pet unicorn, Uni. They
first had to find a map of
The Fortress of Crowds, where Superman stored
all those who had ever opposed him.
Petey, after securing his pouch, set off
on an epic journey to locate the
six remote controls to his entertainment system
which were scattered around Earth. The first
, with the power of earth, was hidden
inside a bejeweled statue depicting the ancient
jellybean-eating monster known only as Blob.
The second, with power of atomic wedgies,
could be found deep within the bowels
of an abandoned Discovery Zone in Illinois.
The third, with power of Commodore 64,
was ingeniously stoned within an advanced facility
used to construct very tiny robots for
the first two remotes. The fourth, with power
of air, was hidden in the lungs
of Potatoman, a highly splendiferous and extremely
high-rent metropolis with many resorts for
Mothra to put to sleep. These Kaiju
knew where the fifth remote, with power
of fire and water, had been concealed:
a block of cheese inside of the
Frenchest of all the French art galleries
, The Frenchington, Located in Paris, France, where
wine-flavored cigarettes and atomic-powered berets
were endorsed by the foppish nobility as
the snootiest frogs ate their own legs.
Meanwhile, the departure of the Old Ones
was cause for great lamentation among the
global intelligentsia, who had hoped they would
usher in a new age of madness
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