Sylph

WILL CRITIQUE FOR FOOD's page

3 posts. Alias of Dieben.


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Wolin wrote:
Security Blanket

Easily one of the most memorable entries this year.

Magical Toys R' Us will offer a holiday bundle sale of the Security Blanket and the Plush Guardian of Cuddles.

You've covered all of my critique except for one: Why is the creation cost 1/4 of the price instead of 1/2?

Great Work!


Belabras wrote:
Auric Hush

This item is mechanically sound, but lacks originality in its concept.

Price-wise, this is extremely overpriced for a DC 14 Will save. I did like how the coin itself is accounted for in the construction requirements. This item would be much more appropriate for 5,002 gp or likely even lower.

Construction wise, silence is immensely more appropriate for this item than bestow curse.

My largest contention with this entry is that it is basically Ursula's seashell from Disney's The Little Mermaid. When you base your item off of something that already exists in a video game, movie, anime, television program, novel series, or some other media, all I learn is how capable you are at making a conversion or adaptation of the source.

What I want to see from you next year is something original, something novel. You clearly have the chops to build something mechanically strong. By making some truly original content, I feel you may have a shot at the Top 32 next season.


If somebody is concerned about the public's thoughts on your item, feel free to contact me, I'll give it the once-over. If anything, I can try to allay some of your concerns. I feed off of social interaction, so this gives me a reason to be chatty too.