The Anti-Chris's page

My Wonder Woman flies an invisible jet which does NOT make her invisible. Thus it looks like a patriotic stripper is squatting across the sky.

lisamarlene wrote:

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At some point, I will retire and finish my days as a National Park Service ranger.
Rangers do not have to write progress reports. They probably also get paid better than teachers. Everyone does.

Okay Ranger lisamarlene, I need your reports on how all the young squirrels in the park are progressing, and I need them by Friday.

Also, I see here on your resume that you used to be a teacher. Therefore, I am putting you in charge of all school field trips. You'll schedule them, work with the teachers to figure out how to keep all the kids from getting lost, talk to the parents about how you'll keep their precious darlings from even so much as seeing a mosquito or other insect, you'll be the tour guide and answer all their questions, you'll help them if they have trouble in the toilet, write up detailed reports on each child's behavior, and just generally be a teacher, but in the woods. Good luck!

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At some point, I will retire and finish my days as a National Park Service ranger.
Rangers do not have to write progress reports. They probably also get paid better than teachers. Everyone does.

Okay Ranger lisamarlene, I need your reports on how all the young squirrels in the park are progressing, and I need them by Friday.

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I really want to post something incredibly snarky such as, "Ah, you cut all the senior staff and brought in junior members to cut costs because your belief is that experience is irrelevant," but I suspect I'd get in trouble.

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Sounds like somebody is volunteering for the next round of rightsizings.

Drejk wrote:

Drejk wrote:

We are going to see Doctor Strange today instead of having session of Vampire The Masquerade - one of the players is busy with work-related things, and her sister was supposed to go see it yesterday. I almost went with her when her intended companion couldn't go but then there was some mess with the tickets and they ended being canceled. So after some discussion on facebook we decided to go today in a larger group.

As the friend stressed yesterday—it is not a date!

Of course not. You can go as friends.

As an aside, call if you need a convenient excuse to create a romantic opportunity.

He should totally bring flours. Whole wheat and self-rising. Giggity.

Drejk wrote:

We are going to see Doctor Strange today instead of having session of Vampire The Masquerade - one of the players is busy with work-related things, and her sister was supposed to go see it yesterday. I almost went with her when her intended companion couldn't go but then there was some mess with the tickets and they ended being canceled. So after some discussion on facebook we decided to go today in a larger group.

As the friend stressed yesterday—it is not a date!

It's totally a date.

Is that why America is going to crap, everyone wants to be paid in cola?!

I'd be happy to pay you with exposure or clout, if you would like.

Kelvin?

Kelvin and Throbbes?

Thetans are like Voltron. The more of them you can hook together, the better!

Well, why didn't you hold a room for them? Huh? You should have known that they were going to come looking for a room, even if they themselves didn't know. How bad are you at your job? Go build an extension to the hotel so they can have a room. Don't you know how important they are? They probably know the owner! And what's all this nonsense about wearing masks? They've never heard anything about needing to wear masks! You're making it up just to oppress them, aren't you? You suck!

But, if I tell you me room number, I'll get charged for it...

"Have you heard the good news about our Lord and Savior 'Shut the F%*! Up'?"

I've got to ... keep control.

gran rey de los mono wrote:

A teenage boy walks into a brothel dragging a dead frog on a leash. He asks the head mistress specifically for a whore with an STD. The mistress is confused and asks the boy why. The boy says, "Well, when I go home my parents will go out and leave me and my little sister with a babysitter. The babysitter will have sex with me and get it. Then when my parents get home my dad will take the babysitter home, bang her on the way and get it. Then he will get home and give it to my mom. Then when my dad goes to work tomorrow, mom will have sex with the mailman and give it to him. And he's the a#!*#&$ that ran over my pet frog!"

Anti-Christ is that you?

Close, but not quite.