Punniculus's page

THE POWER OF CHEESE IS WITH ME!

After multiple attempts to kill Promised Consort Radahan, initially with spells, then by blocking with shield and poking with a rapier, I finally went full in into cheese options, re-speced to have tons of Endurance (he was overwhelming my Stamina with his relentless assault) and proceeded to poke him to death with a significant help from Mimic summon (normally I don't use it because as sorcerer I need a tank and not a half-assed magician with AI that can't really handle spellcasting, but after respec into an Endurance-turtle, it handled throwing hefty rot pots and triggering scarlet rot on Radahn quite well).

That means I am sadly too close to the end of game, with only Godfrey and Radagon/Elden Beast standing before me...

Now, back to Rennala to respec back into something more suitable...

Hey, gouda for you!

You think kudzu needs encouraged to grow?

I did always wonder what happened to that owlbear.

He mostly sits in his room and listens to shit "music". After all, he is basically a teenager by now. Like Infinity War/Endgame Groot, but less useful.

gran rey de los mono wrote:

It will be a non-optional coupon. It's delivered by masked men in a windowless white van. They "escort" you to an undisclosed hair-removal treatment facility. The job is done. Then you are released at a random location somewhere within a 2 mile radius of your home.

If you can trick Vid7 into a bear costume, I know a guy who can shave him...

If I could trick Vid into a bear costume, then I would need to find a willing owl so I could have another owlbear. Fluffles wants a little brother/sister.

Gods can be nekkid if they want to be.

Should be a fun day, I get to put in steps and make a circular wall out of long straight rocks.

I'm going to need my biggest hammers and saw for this one.

Co-worker will either sit back and watch me build it, drive back and forth, or help me build it, but f$%! it up so I have to build it myself anyway.

I'm not trying to be a jerk, it's just not his year this year for whatever reason. He'll bounce back.

*looks up*

(No, Freehold, that's not a euphemism.)

Oh, you're too cute to be mad at.

*cuddles Fluffles*

Orthos wrote:

Nylarthotep wrote:

Marriage is both a civil and a religious contract. You can actually do one without the other.

They're the type of hardcore conservative who sees them as one and the same.

Once again, I find myself pondering become a state licensed officiant and setting up a tax shelter cult Church of Slaadi.

I could use a Cleric, if you're interested. The benefits are lots of puns, and you get to try and litter-train an adolescent owlbear.

*scowls at mounds of owlbear pellets*

*inspects hammer*

Can I use it to make another owlbear. Fluffles here is getting lonely.

I just remembered a phrase that was used when I first started frequenting this thread. YOU GET BACK HERE AND #$%^ THIS OWL! and I'm laughing to tears from remembering it...

Well, I needed my owlbear. And he's so cute.

*tickles owlbear*

*looks up from baby owlbear*

I don't know, but I approve.

*tries to teach baby owlbear how to twerk*

*looks up from playing with adolescent owlbear*

Huh.

*goes back to playing with adolescent owlbear*

Just think of all the bad puns it will learn.

There are no bad puns on FaWtL. It may develop a brief obsession with owlbears, however.

*looks up from playing with baby owlbear (is it still a baby? how long does it take owlbears to mature?)*

I feel a disturbance in the Force. It kinda tickles.

I like it.

*keeps playing with owlbearlet*

I picked up my friends hamster and it bit me. I shudder to think what would happen if I tried to touch a pet ferret.

Man, if only Kileanna and her owl were here, we could borrow the hamster and try to create a Porg for the owlbearlet to play with.

*continues trying to teach the owlbearlet to tell jokes*

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Just a Mort wrote:

I wonder what everyone's gonna say when they wake up and find the conversation between us both and different types of felines ^^

Trust me, there have been much stranger conversations for people to wake up to here. Some of the ones between Punniculus and Kileanna, for example.

Yeah some of those where a real hoot. >.>

You are referring, of course, to the ones about owlbears, yes?

*goes back to playing with the baby owlbear*

Keep thinking, psycho clown. Nothing is better than an owlbear. And mine is the cutesiest, wootsiest, widdle, biddy, owlybeary there is! Yes you are! YES YOU ARE!!

*continues playing with baby(?) owlbear*

Hey Orthos, if you need me to be a villain for FaWtL Fantasy, I'm all for it. Especially if I can have an Owlbear familiar.

...Is your kind of game also the kind of game that involves puns at every possible opportunity...

Yes. Yes it is.

*looks up from playing with baby owlbear*

Huh? Did someone say something?

No. Okay, good.

*continues playing with baby owlbear*

*teleports in with a hogtied Benedict Cumberbatch*

*leaves Mr. Chunderthighs behind with a sign that reads "Eggs Benedict"*

Speaking of the owlbear, he/she is extremely cute, cuddly, and affectionate. Also, a little terrifying when hungry. In other words, it's everything I ever hoped for!

I'm too busy playing with my new owlbear.

Who's a cute little abomination? You are!

Whew I'm glad that problem took care of itself not that it wasn't a Hoot! cause it wasn't...

*looks at Un-Bear-able, then at baby owlbear, back to Un-Bear-able*

I don't know. The little one kinda looks like you. Maybe it's the ruff.

So, maybe only Punniculus can answer this:

** spoiler omitted **
I blame Freehold and Limey entirely for this conversation.

Depends on the owl.

*Pops out from behind a tree, followed by a tiny owlbear*

*Whatever happened on this time that she was away will always remain a mystery*

*grabs tiny owlbear*

HUZZAH! An owlbear of my very own! Good job, Nina. Here, have a tasty mouse snack.

*holds out a live mouse for the owl*

And then make sure one of those bears f%~$s an owl.

Punniculus wrote:

Un-Bear-able Puns wrote:

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Of course, for a real twist, the tree could piddle on the wolf.

That would be inappropiENT Tree-tment of that poor wolf... Sorry I'll just leaf now.

*casts Charm Animal*

Oh, no. You're not going anywhere until you f**$ an owl.

Captain Danger Bear is always willing, but only if the owl is poisonous.

Sounds good to me. Then I'll have poisonous owlbears.

SOMEONE FIND ME A POISONOUS OWL!!!

And some pants.

There could be other owls.

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Of course, for a real twist, the tree could piddle on the wolf.

That would be inappropiENT Tree-tment of that poor wolf... Sorry I'll just leaf now.

*casts Charm Animal*

Oh, no. You're not going anywhere until you f#%* an owl.

Hmm, a stuttering rabbit. I wonder what would result if it f*+$ed a bear? Or an owl? It ought to be less hesitant to attempt to mate, after all there must be a reason for the phrase "banging like bunnies".

*pushes Vidmaster7 into the well*

No.

*digs a hole, fills it with water*

There's your well. Now what.

*debates with himself if he should try to explain biology to a trickster god*

Probably not

*walks away*

Don't try to confuse me with your science. I know that with magic all things are possible.

*tapes a torch to a fox*

See. I just created FireFox. Go forth and browse the internet.

Three! Three bears! One owl! WHY AM I NOT UP TO MY ARMPITS IN OWLBEARS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Punniculus wrote:

Two new bears?! Where's an owl when I need one?

*looks at bears, looks at Pun-god, shakes head emphatically.*

Ooohhh no.
I'm too old for stuff like this ya whipper-snapper.

Come on. A little trans-species nookie never hurt anyone.

I'm guessing.

Two new bears?! Where's an owl when I need one?

It's lonely around here without my followers. I don't even have an owlbear to cuddle with.

Maybe being nekkid will help me find some company.

For what it's worth, I could use a follower to dress like this.

I haven't seen any bears or owls around recently. Hopefully that means there is a plethora of interspecies nookie happening somewhere, which will soon result in me acquiring my desired owlbears. Fingers, and other things, crossed.

Punniculus wrote:

Tasha the half-kender wrote:

Punniculus wrote:

*looks around for strange eggs*

Still no owlbears, eh? I think I need to give Viagra to the critters.

On second thought, I'll have someone else do it. Just in case.

Oh, Taaaassshhhaaaa!! Your god has a task for youuuuuu!

Here and ready!

I have stolen...borrowed GoatToucher's mighty medicines and I am ready to do whatever I have to do!

Excellent! Find an owl and a bear, I don't much care which ones, and use said medicinals to get them busy getting busy. Maybe you can use your bardic abilities to set the mood? You know what, I'll leave the specifics up to you. I don't really need the details.

I cannot use my CLERIC performance for that... I am not Barry White...

But I'll device something clever.

I leave this in your hands. Metaphorically. I don't expect you to actually handle...things. Unless you're into that. Then, once again, I don't need details.

Punniculus wrote:

*looks around for strange eggs*

Still no owlbears, eh? I think I need to give Viagra to the critters.

On second thought, I'll have someone else do it. Just in case.

Oh, Taaaassshhhaaaa!! Your god has a task for youuuuuu!

Here and ready!

I have stolen...borrowed GoatToucher's mighty medicines and I am ready to do whatever I have to do!

Excellent! Find an owl and a bear, I don't much care which ones, and use said medicinals to get them busy getting busy. Maybe you can use your bardic abilities to set the mood? You know what, I'll leave the specifics up to you. I don't really need the details.

Turns out worshiping a trickster god has its ups and downs. (and ins and outs?)

Ins and outs are what I'm hoping for. Possibly some ups and downs if the owl and the bear decide to try cowgirl style.

But do you have any grapes?

*beans Vidmaster7 in the head with a Red Delicious*

No, but how do you like them apples?

*follows up with a Granny Smith*

*looks around for strange eggs*

Still no owlbears, eh? I think I need to give Viagra to the critters.

On second thought, I'll have someone else do it. Just in case.

Oh, Taaaassshhhaaaa!! Your god has a task for youuuuuu!

Punniculus wrote:

Build, scmuild. Wear what you want. Or go for Professor Port. Or if you want to go bear-like, we can probably set you up with an Ursa costume.

Although, if you have your heart set on bear, that's fine too. After all, I'm still trying to breed some owlbears. Maybe you'll be more willing than the last one.

OOoh. An Ursa outfit would look freakin' awesome! SOLD!*

It's large enough that we may be able to rig up some kind of AC in it. Then again, we have magic. We can enchant it with Endure Elements and keep you comfy.

Punniculus wrote:

I'm also looking for someone to wear this.

Honestly, I'd love to just form a group that's made of lovelies dressed as characters from RWBY.

I'd love to dress as Qrow, but I sadly lack the build for it... he's all wiry an' stuff, and I'm anything but.

Jean's outfit looks like way too much work, and my hair doesn't take dye.

Hmmm.

Would wearing a bear costume work?

Build, scmuild. Wear what you want. Or go for Professor Port. Or if you want to go bear-like, we can probably set you up with an Ursa costume.

Although, if you have your heart set on bear, that's fine too. After all, I'm still trying to breed some owlbears. Maybe you'll be more willing than the last one.

Punniculus wrote:

Honestly, I'd love to just form a group that's made of lovelies dressed as characters from RWBY.

Dibs on Adam.

Noted.

I'm also looking for someone to wear this.

Honestly, I'd love to just form a group that's made of lovelies dressed as characters from RWBY.

I don't suppose there's someone out there just waiting to be one of my minions and is interested in wearing this oufit, is there?