When my mother asked me about the hickeys that would occasionally appear on my neck I would tell her the most clever and plausible of lies to conceal their origins: I told her I was the victim of repeated vampire attacks!
The rolling of her eyes was a clear sign her brain was being overwhelmed by the truthiness of my silver tongued deception!
(er, and if you happen to read this at some point mom, I may have been lying about that but that twenty that disappeared from your wallet when I was eight really was stolen by those vulture monsters from the Dark Crystal and the candy I had was my reward for chasing them off…I love you!)
For instance, the... person in the vid, their arms looked to me like a man's arms trying to masquerade as a woman's arms. The rest was a somewhat convincing disguise/bluff, but thing stick out (no pun intended) for those that pay attention.
I think she is really cute myself, plus, gamer girl(with glasses!), there is nothing hotter than that. If I met her I’d ask her for her number.
BTW, I posted these for their humor factor. Just to make sure everyone knows that. I don't subscribe to these wacky theories. There are plenty of others that I can latch onto.
Replace "puppet" with "master" and I personally agree completely with these articles ;)
Those are slanderous and terrible lies and you should smack anyone who promotes them!
A conspiracy theory, harrumph!
I mean sure, we fans behave like fanatical cultists in our worship of the Mother Monster and sure, we are so brainwashed into accepting and celebrating each others differences that when she begins to work her fleshchanging magic to transform us into a legion of actual Little Monsters nothing will even seem out of place to us and sure, she is planning on triggering the apocalypse when she sings the final lines of born this way at the….oh…uh oh, I think I’ve said too much….Lady Gaga is going to accept me into tiny bloody chunks for this, isn’t she? =(
I suspected that this would become a penis size conversation at some point, I just wasn’t sure when.
There's too many gun topics in OTD. Needs a different kind of misfiring discussion. Obviously lacking in penis debates.
Well, I suppose we could create an OTD about all things dirty to take the heat off of all these intense political discussions. Everyone would have to create an alias to “hide” their identity as not to be seen in such a shameful place of course, but who knows, we might be able to attract the attention of some of Paizo’s more illustrious political posters and their alias'; a Girth Gersen or a BigNorse$%%^ perhaps.
There are people whose posts sometimes irritate me and I occasionally get into b#@#@y back and forths with them, but my final feelings about those exchanges can better be described as amused than enemy creating.
I also know that there are people who I irritate because they often climb up my ass about all sorts of things but those people usually eventually either reach a point where they are ok with me after talking to me long enough to figure out what I am actually about(and also that my sense of humor honestly isn’t meant to be insulting)or they just give up completely on me so that tends to work itself out with time.
Actually one of the most common strong reactions I have to some other posters (some of whom I talk to, some of whom I almost never talk to) is to wish I could hang out with them for a day in real life, just because I both think we might really get along and have fun together and also because I realize just how much of who I am gets lost in translation on the internet and I suspect that the same is true of them, which makes me wonder: How much could we learn if we could just have fun face to face hang out sessions sometimes?.
As just a heads up to anyone who wants to be considerate of the feelings of people who suffer from a mental illness you might want to stop talking about mental illness and violence and instability like the two are connected at the hip.
To perhaps add a little bit of perspective: speaking in that way sounds pretty much like the equivalent of talking about homosexuality and child rape like they are directly related. Yes, some individuals have both traits and within that individual’s circumstances they can be closely related but the core concepts involved don’t actually have anything to do with one another and speaking as if they do can come off as extremely offensive.
I know noone is doing it on purpose but speaking as though mentally ill people are dangerous and need to watched really is sounding like a “don’t let the gays near your kids.” argument, if you are trying to be considerate maybe add a “demonstrably violent” tag to your mental illness label in the future, as that is really the more important part.
God, this is just terrible, sympathies to the victims and their families=(
On the subject of the mentally ill and guns one of the things it is important to realize is that despite the social stigma against them the vast majority of mentally ill people are not violent or dangerous AT ALL.
I do think a far greater effort needs to be made to curb the threat people with obviously violent tendencies, mentally ill or not, present however. I suppose that is a somewhat ironic statement coming from someone who was as violent as I was when I was younger but it is always both shocking and not ok at all how much brutality society actually puts up with up until the day it ends with some innocent person getting put in the ground.
In the case of the shooter who knows if there was a history of violence or any real warning signs or not but it honestly wouldn’t surprise me if he had made it clear that he was a threat to the people around him and nothing was ever done about it, that is just kind of how our society works. Sometimes it is a failure of the law, and sometimes it is just people being unwilling to use the law but either way that is often how it goes.
And I got a, "Good morning, hope you have a good day at work" text. How cute is that?
Nice! I think that is cool, even though I myself now hate texting, something I realized even before my phone became possessed by demons and had to be destroyed for the good of mankind.
I hate that autocorrect, predictive text feature thingy and even though I would turn it off my phone would sneakily turn it back on at random times when I wasn’t paying attention just to make me look stupid.
Like I’m trying to get my sexting on and I get a reply:
“I don’t understand, what do you mean the next time you see me you are going to get on your keys and kick my pushy?”
Choice two: A particularly tasty and edible metaphor for the amazing accomplishments various disparate factions can achieve when they set aside their differences and work together towards a common, delicious goal.
Sorry to interrupt guys, please continue to discuss the social merits of being able to deep throat a banana. ;) >:D
No problem DeathQuaker, Yes it is being able to have high brow intellectual conversations like this one that drew me to the internet in the first place. I'm sure everyone reading at home is significantly better off in their personal lives now knowing that I can swallow fruits whole, just doing my very best to make the world a better place, day by day, post by post.
I had a friend make fun of my love of bananas a while ago and comment on how it seemed a little gay. In response I peeled a banana then swallowed it whole without chewing. He was like: “Damn, loving bananas may or may not be gay but whatever you just did there, that was DEFINITLY gay.”
I’m not denying it’s true(there are a lot of people in the world with a lot of different beliefs) but I have known a lot of gay men and as far as I know none of them have believed this.
It was more of a “Wait, you are telling me unicorns are real?” with a skeptical look on my face and Darkwing was like “Bam! Proof of unicorns!”
You didn't get randomly mad, he actually did say something that pissed you off ;)
In answer to your question; though I am rather new to both sides of the table I’ve found the most helpful thing I can do in portraying a woman (I am a man) is to just do what I do with every other character and toss out stereotypes in favor of giving the person some pressing, close to the surface motivations that are sure to come up during an adventure and a distinctive personal habit or two. Doing so seems to make the character much more memorable all around then just focusing on a single aspect of them and their gender doesn’t get forgotten, just rolled into the greater whole of who the other players think the character is.
This is indeed one of those subjects we have to try be careful with using the correct terminology about if we are trying to be sensitive seeing as the social stigma against mental illness is basically just as strong as it is against LGBTQ people, if a great deal quieter. It’s just something to pay closer attention to in the future if we value not making marginalized people feel even more misunderstood or made fun of then they already are. No harm intended I'm sure, just something to watch out for.
When I visited my grandfather last month he gave me his lively, if somewhat vitriolic, opinion on the fading support for the sciences, among like fifty other rants. I would type out the entirety of the conversation that I recall but half of it would disappear under the profanity filter so I’ll just give you the broad strokes. He is of the opinion that part of what changed from the great support of the 50s and 60s to the lackluster care of modern times is that back then the heights of technology where so mysterious and out of reach of the common man that they assumed an almost magical quality in the minds of the uneducated and held immense fascination. Nowadays a startling level of tech is in the hands of us rubes and we have lost our fervor for the arcane powers of science.
“The damnest thing is that people never supported the sciences, not really!” He informed me. “It was merely a replacement mythology and now that the magic is gone you useless wastes of space have dropped support of it even though we are in a position to accomplish more now than ever thought possible! You kids are the worst, you have no interest in the only real thing that can unlock the secrets of the universe and change our lives for the better! I hate you all!”
“I dunno grandpa, I’ve always thought science was pretty cool.” I informed him.
“That’s because you’re so dumb everything is still magical to you boy! I doubt your ability to add two single, positive integers together you stupid piece of s*#&.” He declared.
“I think perhaps I can prove you wrong, but first I’m going to have to Google what an integer is on my iphone.” I replied.
LMAO!! When one flirts one never knows what one will catch! Well played :^)
Edit: it was my friendly yank on the chain. Nonetheless I wonuldn't be surprised to see a call to folks to present themselves on FB. I am there already but I facebook -- apparently it's a verb now too -- 2 or 3 times a month because I have more interesting things to do with my life than to catch-up and respond to a gazillion inane...
Lol, I find the secret to good flirting is to be, well, flirty. If you offer the goods upfront where is the fun of the chase?
As far as facebook goes I have a whole bunch of people that really seem to want me to join but the more I learn the more I am just not interested at all. It’s seems to be a weird mix of the impersonal and the way too personal I just do not like at all. If someone wants to talk to me the can put in some good old fashion mild amount of effort in and call, text or email me instead of posting their graffiti on my wall! If they want to stalk me they should camp outside my house like a proper psycho!
I've heard giant robots can also be involved. Admittedly that comes up less often in most social situations.
I would totally sleep with a giant robot.
I'm pretty sure that Samnell's comment might have been a reference to Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann.
Or not...
Actually no. I'm years behind on my mecha watching. I think the last full series I sat through was RahXephon. I didn't much watch this show, but I remember the creators being on Tech TV and someone asked about the accuracy of the final claim in the lyrics:
"I don't know, do they?" The whole female audience (which ok was about 20 people) cheered.
Whatever your original reference you have inadvertently sold me on a naughty encounter with a giant robot. If I ever become a rich man(and gain all the universe jumping powers that obviously entails) I shall find an Anime Super Engineer™ and have him build me one.
I imagine the conversation might go a bit like this:
Me: “I need you to build me the most powerful Gundam you can and put the strongest weapons and armor on it you can find.”
Anime Engineer: “Hmmm, Ok, are you starting a war or something?”
Me: “No my good man, I am simply a person that has grown tired of my small, delicate lovers and how gentle I must always remind myself to be with them to avoid hurting them. I need a true war machine in my harem for my more drunken, wild nights. I need you to build this mecha so that I may make love to it!”
There have been a lot of people in my life that have helped me out and contributed to the growth of the person I am slowly becoming, but there is one man in particular that has both helped me an amazing amount and also brought to my attention how he thinks I should be spending my energies(and over time I find myself agreeing with him more and more). Though there is much about him I find frightening and inscrutable in the end I just can’t help but listen to his bizarre narratives, skeptical though I am, the conviction they are presented in impossible to completely ignore.
About that man and our initial conversations(warning, this is long):
He is an older gentleman whom I’ve heard apparently spent much of his adult life in prison. He is covered in tattoos, many quite low quality, that all seem to involve blood, blades, skulls, and spiders in some fashion. He has blacked out some on his forearms I’ve recently learned where once white power tags, Nazi death’s heads and SS thunderbolts. I met him when I joined one social group that was made up of 20 something kids that were true party animals. It was strange seeing him around, a weathered 50+ year old man moving through the tight packed crowds of attractive people and watching them flow out of his way like a school of fish avoiding a large shark that happens to be drifting by. Normally an old guy at parties like these ones would provoke any number of reactions, respect though? Not usually.
He would talk to people sometimes and though I could never hear the conversations people always seemed to hang on his every word. I asked my new friends about him and they would say he was cool but never seemed comfortable saying much more. Of course something about this situation drew me to dig deeper, ever curious as I am.
I approached him one night and struck up a conversation. Five minutes into it I realized how completely disoriented I was becoming at the way the conversation was going. It took me a minute but I finally realized what was happening. Every person I have ever talked to in person has had a strong reaction to me immediately, for good or ill, and I use that to move the conversation along. This guy though, there was nothing there emotionally. He engaged me fully and asked questions and made comments so he seemed interested in the conversation from that point of view but emotionally? Blank. His body posture was relaxed and his tone friendly and soft but there was no true clue about what he thought of me or what he felt. Feeling strange I found myself telling him all about myself, spilling my entire life story over the course of a few hours. The same response all the way through. My high points didn’t elicit a wider smile, my dark secrets didn’t get an out of place blink, my hard times didn’t furrow his brow. I finished and was left with…nothing. We had a friendly parting and I continued to see him around and I talked to him sometimes but it was always the same, just a reserved nothingness.
A confluence of events at one point in my life basically left me destitute and in a lot of debt and I talked about it pretty consistently with my friends. One night this man shows up at a party I’m at and hands me a bag. “This is for you.” He tells me.
I open it, inside of it is money, a LOT of money.
“What do I have to do for it…” I ask hesitantly.
“Nothing, it’s a gift, no strings attached.” He responds.
I look at him for a long while. “What kind of job do you have that you have this much money to just hand someone you barely know?” I inquire.
“I’m unemployed.” He replies. “And I know you better than you think.”
“You’re a drug dealer or a hitman or something, aren’t you?” I ask, only half joking.
“No.” He says, then turns and starts walking away. Over his shoulder he continues. “Like I told you, I’m unemployed.”
I saw him about two weeks later and thanked him for what he had done. I then asked him the question that had been burning inside me.
“Why help me?” I asked. “Who is it that you think I am? What do you see when you look at me?”
A genuinely amused grin crossed his face. “It’s noisy in here, let’s go talk down by the lake.”
We went outside and walked in silence for awhile until we reached the shore. He turned towards me and calmly withdrew a large blade from within the recesses of his coat. I took an unconscious step back in alarm but he didn’t seem to notice. He squatted down and began craving the wet sand into images. Four circles, two of which overlap.
“Come down.” He told me. I squatted.
“Here is how I see most people interact with the world.” He told me, pointing to the interlocked circles. “One circle represents the person, their thoughts, their feelings, their sense of self, the other the world, the events, people and situations that make up their environment. The two are tightly entwined for the normal person and much of their struggles come from outside forces invading and effecting them and the amount of effort they have to expend to push back and retain their proper sense of self. Do you understand?” He asked.
“I think so.” I replied.
“This represents you.” He said, pointing to the disconnected circles. “World and self, separated and inviolate, the only connections they share a result of the bridges you yourself build. You are, more than anyone else I’ve ever met, an island unto yourself, at least in relation to a forces ability to enter your domain.”
I gave him a funny look. “I don’t know what you are talking about, other people have a huge effect on me, I care deeply about what they think of me and about how they experience things.”
“That is true, you do, but there is something you are missing: The only folks that enter your house are the ones you invite in, the only circumstances that haunt you for any length of time are the ones you make a conscious decision to effect you. You have, never once in your entire life, no matter how bad things got, felt helpless.”
I chewed on that a bit. “I suppose that might be true.” I acknowledged, thinking. “Perhaps it’s just my size, it’s hard to oppress someone this big!” I joked after a bit.
“Mmmm, perhaps, though I suspect there is more to the story. The world of men works according to fundamentally strict laws that never change and there is one power in this world, one authority, that trumps all others.” He informed me.
“God?” I asked.
“…Violence.” He replied. “And that is the secret to who you are, your violence. It is a truth that goes deeper than simply your size and inclinations. It seems to me your raw physicality is nothing more than a suitable metaphor for the soul inside. You are not violent because you are big; you are big because you are violent. While on the one hand you are just a man like your fellows there is an element to you that seems the embodiment of a concept, a paragon if you will. Who do I think you are? I think you are Violence. I think you are Conflict. I think you are Destruction. I think you are War.”
I was startled. “You think I am…a bad person?” I inquired hesitantly.
His lip upturned in a sneer. “Who am I to judge you on being a bad or good person?” He demanded darkly. “If that ever even comes into play it will be as the balance of your life, not as the opinion of a man, but I can tell you this: You are right to turn your most brutal instincts away from your fellow man and directing them inward has its advantages but what you really should do is embrace the strength they give you and turn them against concepts.”
“Concepts?” I asked, confused.
“The average human being walking this planet is weighted down by the heavy chains of shame, self-doubt, resentment and the good, old fashion, gut wrenching terror of being judged harshly by their peers. The only chains holding you down are the ones you yourself are using to strangle yourself with, instead, release yourself and use your gift as a living battering ram to shatter what bonds you can and try to show the people around you that, while there is a sickening amount of things wrong with the world, being the person you really are is never wrong, it may in fact be the only thing that is right.”
“I…see, and how would I go about doing that?” I inquired.
“For starters? Just always be as honest as you can be. Confess to what makes you beautiful, confess to what makes you ugly. Be willing to push the envelope and make mistakes and doubly be willing to learn from them. There is something incredibly innocent about you in the end, even at your most cruel no true malice has ever existed in you. Use that innocence to feel your way along, clumsy though you are and even though you are more likely to appear the fool than the hero.”
“I…could try that, I guess. Alright, sure I will try to do it.” I agreed.
“You truly think violence is at the core of who I am?” I asked after a bit, looking down at the circles once more.
He slapped me across the face. Hard.
Snarling in startled outrage I slammed my fist into his chest and sent him tumbling back into the lake.
He sat up in the water, soaked and gasping, trying to regain the breathe I knocked out of him.
As he struggled I mastered my anger and then glared at him. Seeing what was coming I declared unapologetically: “I’m pretty sure that was just the typical persons reaction to being b!cth slapped, you ass.”
After a long minute he regained his wind. “I think you just cracked my ribs.” He said simply, then laughed loud and long, though it obviously pained him to do so.
I have always known what the exact right thing to do is in any social situation, immediately after I have done the opposite.
It's all good. For me personally I usually have to try like 50 different approaches to a new social situation before I find a way that works both consistently and reliably and also delivers the messages I am trying to communicate correctly, you guys think some of the stuff I talk about sounds bad? Where do you think I learned this sh!t? Solely from observation of others? Ahahahahahaha, yeah right!
I actually know a transgender girl right now who is in a decently similar situation. People talking to her are like "Wait, you're masculine in behavior, have a penis and like girls, how are you a woman?"
To which she replies: "Layers! Layers! LAYERS! I have depth and layers! Will you people please just pay attention! GRRRRRRRAAAAAAGH!!!!"
I'm sorry you've had a hard time making friends, I guess I feel I should inform you having read alot of what you have posted around here I think you are cool and am pretty sure I would like being buddies if I met you in real life. Sure, you're a spaz sometimes but I find that endearing and hilarious instead of annoying.
I hope your school career works outs. If nothing else the culinary training is a boon, there is no downside to knowing how to cook well.
I enjoyed reading this and it was a lot of fun to read. The backstory you've mentioned about yourself puts things in perspective and I have ot admit, I agree about gamers being really smart as I too am reletively new to the community...well actuallly possibly a year or two, but I still consider myself new as I never grew up with D&D (unless you consider the TV show) or any other gaming system.
Sometimes I find they're too smart for they're own good as they can come up with multiple ways to beat encounters or solve problems which can be frustraiting but in a fun way. I enjoy seeing my player's brainstorm over every little thing and come up with a million and one solutions to something that I could only see 5 in :p
I'm glad you've enjoyed it. Yep, gamers are cool and, say whatever else you want about them, clever and entertaining.
My post is aimed at men(thus the spoiler saying so) but all men, not just men of a certain sexuality. Even gay men, who do not have the sexual element, I have experienced objectifying women and while women have plenty to take personal responsibility for in their lives the weight of how it has played out in our society rests more heavily on men in my opinion and we need to take an honest look at ourselves. You may disagree, but it how I feel.
I just started my adventures in DMing a few days ago with the Shackled City campaign and will be occupied with that for a long time but I am considering running a self made campaign after that. My idea for the final intelligent campaign villain: a 20th level sorcerer with PC treasure that manipulates the various factions in the world into conflict to increase the power of Chaos in the world as the foundation of a ritual to propel himself into godhood. Armed with illusions, a ridiculously high Bluff check and concealed by the Mind Blank spell he uses clever and despicable manipulation techniques to set the Great and the Good at each others throats without them realizing the true source of their conflicts.
At low levels the PCs adventures will involve dealing with the fallout of the plots the villain has already perpetrated, though they won’t realize initially that is what is happening. At high levels they will deal with powerful nations with vast resources tearing each other apart and trying to find the true cause of it all and stop it. I’m thinking it will all cumulate with the PCs discovering the final truth of what is happening and rushing to stop the ritual in a final adventure.
The sorcerer will not be built to be super effective in combat and will not have a large organization, just a few deadly minions as bodyguards but he will use some super nasty tricks against the PCs (I have couple really nasty planned events involving the cursed items dust of sneezing and choking in a hideous trap and a necklace of strangulation cleverly disguised and offered to a PC as a gift from a trusted “friend”). I plan for the investigative process of unraveling what is happening in the campaign to be long and confusing (though ultimately understandable and not frustrating.) and the final fight to be brutal and satisfying. If I do it right the resolution of the final conflict should be an elated “YES! WE’VE FINALLY PUT AN END TO THE MADNESS!” And also a bewildered: “The entire world was almost brought to its knees by one simple, shameless liar? We as a people really need to pay closer attention to what is happening around us!”
I to have always preferred thinking man villains over brutes and the idea of a Campaign Villain spinning the PCs in circles and threatening them using underhanded deception rather than ungodly strength highly appeals to me.
Combine James Sutter's and Deathquaker's experiences with prejudice together and add how mean and bullying a Bi-Sexual man like I can be and you make an interesting observation: That @$$holes come in all orientations.
We really do have more in common with each other then may be readily apparent. The world is less about good guys and bad guys then it is about each of us just trying to make our way along the path of life. I ask everyone reading this to do your best to treat your fellow travelers with compassion, mercy and understanding as much as you can, what binds us together can be stronger than what pulls us apart if we let it.
A note to straight guys who have experienced people thinking they are gay; In all likelihood it prolly just means you are clean, polite and soft spoken, all positive qualities. What you might want to try is that the next time you are flirting with a girl at a party and she makes a comment about you being gay instead of being offended say: "Yes, I am gay. I have never been with a woman, though I'm curious about what it would be like." and just see what happens.
What are you attempting to accomplish by saying I'm absurdly bigoted? Is it to get me angry or to respond to you in kind?
I know your just pathetically looking for attention sweety.
No I just meant what I said. To see what I'm talking about look to your third sentence.
The takeaway is that apparently Aretas thinks being more observant of church-state separation is some kind of step down the road we're all planning to, I don't know, gas Christians or something. Maybe make them get gay married.
Can you please act a little bit more mature. This is very inappropriate, and to suggest I think this is irresponsible.
It's all good Aretas, Samnell is just one of those guys that gets a little b!tchy when confronted with absurdly bigoted opinions, nothing against you personally.
One of my best friends is transgender and while I will say his situation is incredibly complicated he is one of the bravest and most interesting people I have ever met
I believe he was meant to be born as a giant wall of a man like me but fate pulled a cruel trick and stuck him in the body of an incredibly petite woman.
That hasn’t slowed him down in the least.
On one of the first nights we were hanging out after he had explained his situation to me he challenged me to a drinking contest.
We drank an ungodly amount of Southern Comfort, with me continuously mocking him about how falling down drunk he was getting while I was barely fazed.
Finally he stood and told me. “You really just need every square inch of your ass kicked.”
I was about to reply when he swung on me. He almost connected but I managed to catch his wrist and throw him to the floor, where he tried to gain his feet several times but was simply too drunk. His girlfriend apologized profusely to me but I told her it wasn’t a problem, everyone does silly things when that drunk.
When I saw him a few days later I was expecting either that he would apologize, or that he didn’t really remember it and the parts he did would just get swept under the rug.
I was fine with either but that’s not what I got. Instead, now fully sober he told me. “Oh, good to see you, now about that ass beating I owe you!” and proceeded to attack me. I’m not kidding.
After manhandling him for about five minutes I pinned him and told him. “You know, you may not have a penis but you have the biggest balls of anyone I’ve ever met.”
While this behavior may seem needlessly confrontational it has actually done some pretty amazing good. About a year before I met him he apparently interrupted some wannabe gay bashers threatening a man and managed to chase them off (presumably by acting crazy as %^&&, I never got the whole story), and became a bit of a hero to much of the local LGBT community.
That is what he is like, a strong sense of justice, ferociously loyal and never willing to back down from anything.
His penchant for resolving issues with violence did lead to one ugly incident once though.
I received a call from his girlfriend one night and she was sobbing incoherently and told me she needed me to come over. She couldn’t articulate what the problem was but just kept saying she wanted me to come over so my girlfriend and I rushed over.
I found them sitting on the floor of their apartment crying and holding each other. My friend had a number of cuts in the side of his face and his girl had a busted lip and welts on her body.
At first I thought they had been attacked but talking to them the story of what happened slowly began to emerge.
My friend’s girlfriend is a beautiful girl and quite a kind person but while she takes care of herself she tends to create a lot of messes around the house that she then leaves for my friend to clean up. Seeing as she is also unemployed (by her own choice) they had been fighting about it because my friend didn’t think that it was unreasonable to at least ask her to pick up after herself.
Apparently at one point he said some hurtful things to her then began walking away and she picked up a glass globe and threw it at him. It shattered on the wall near his head and bits of glass bit into his face. In a rage he turned around and set on her with his fists.
We wanted to take them to the hospital but my friend didn’t want to go himself so my girlfriend took his and left and he and I went to the bathroom so I could get the glass out of his face and clean him up. We talked about what happened for awhile while I worked but as I was almost done he made the following statement in a matter-of-fact tone:
“I do regret hitting her but you have to admit, she kinda deserved it.”
I seized him by the chin and lifted him clear off his feet, slamming him against the bathroom wall and holding him level with my face so I could look him in the eye.
“What happened here tonight was NOT GOOD!” I snarled at him. “You need to take control of your temper and make sure this NEVER happens again. You have reasonable requests to make of her and arguments are fine but you need to not respond to her bull sh!t with your fists. You’re a man, now act like it!”
“You’re trying to teach me a lesson about controlling my temper while you’re dangling me by the neck?” He muttered back at me from between my fingers defiantly.
“Oh…” I replied, taking a deep breath and gently setting him down. “That is rather hypocritical isn’t it? I apologize; I guess I should watch my temper as well, it’s just that talk of people ‘Deserving’ violence really sticks in my craw.”
“Don’t worry, this will never happen again, I was caught off guard and reacted badly but it’s not the way I want to treat her, no one deserves to be beaten, especially not her.” He informed me. “And you’re right to respond as you did, I was trying to justify it by blaming her because I feel guilty but that is not ok.”
“I just honestly wonder what is going on with you sometimes, why respond the way you do?” I inquired.
He sat on the toilet lid and rubbed his neck.
“You think you and I have something in common because we are part of a ‘community’ and have both faced harsh levels of bigotry but you have no idea what it is like being me or what I have suffered.”
“Then educate me.” I replied.
“I realized as a little kid that I was a boy and have always been honest about it and in response have received nothing but Sh!t about it my whole life. Even when I encounter the rare person that is willing to take me at my word that I am truthfully a man on the inside they can never truly empathize with me. I remember in middle school my principal gave a talk to the school about tolerance because there was a couple of transgender kids including me who where being pretty severely bullied and he wanted to put an end to it. The end point of his speech was “Be nice to these kids, they are just confused about who they are after all.” My response to that was no, no NO! Transgender people know EXACTLY who we are, the problem is YOU’RE confused about who we are.
I have suffered severe abuse my entire life and have always had to be aware of getting jumped and have had to slug it out with groups of people who were many times my size. The worst was in highschool when a group of senior boys decided to grab me walking home and teach me about “How to be a woman.” I dropped out after that and never returned.”
“…I see. I can see why you would have a bad reaction to a surprise attack then…” I acknowledged.
“The kindest people in this world live by some version of the Golden Rule and try to treat people the way they want to be treated, but it often fails in relation to transgender people because people have such a hard time empathizing with a state of being they have a hard time imagining.” He informed me.
“So what is the answer? How should we approach people in your situation?” I asked.
“If you care about me you need to listen to what I have to say and let me tell you how I feel. Abandon ‘do unto to others as you would have done unto you.’ For ‘treat others as THEY want you, and need you, to.’
“Ok.” I agreed. “I will try.”
It turned out his girlfriend’s injuries where only superficial and she didn’t want the police involved so nothing legal ever came of it. She is not a girl to take something like that lying down though and while she did not leave my friend their relationship certainly suffered from the repercussions of that incident for a long time and perhaps rightly so.
They are still together today and while they certainly have some fiery fights he has never done that again, which makes me happy.
It’s funny, a lot of straight people seem mystified as to what occurs in all these “alternative” relationships they see but in the end we as human beings seem to be all in the same boat, from the heights of ecstatic love to the ugly depths of domestic abuse we are all just people in the end.
My favorite message these days:
“Be kind to one another.” –Ellen Degeneres’ sign off.
On the subject of Christians trying to "Pray the Gay Away." I tried to do this for a friend back when I was a rather uneducated Christian. God responded by making me realize I liked boys too. Oh God you warm hearted joker, you were supposed to cure the "Evil Gayness" not make it contagious!
This has been my experience, pretty much everywhere. It's perfectly acceptable for a woman to be gay or bi, but for a man to be is somehow wrong. A large portion of this, I suspect, and keep in mind I have no professional training on this subject, is because women are seen from an early age as being soft, caregiver types, and responding with compassion to both genders equally. Most mom's hug sons and daughters equally, meanwhile dad is more physically affectionate to a daughter than to a son (outsider's / child's perception). So men having seen their mother kiss a sister or aunt are conditioned that seeing a woman kiss another woman is nothing out of the ordinary in most cases (or they are turned on by it, not sure why on that one though), but having rarely if ever seen their father kiss a boy's booboo's (that's Mom's job after all), a man kissing another man is perceived as unnatural.
This may be true. Another thing I know plays a factor in my personal life at least is that straight men often times find gay men intrinsically threatening because when they find out you like men their first thought is "Does he want to poke me in the rear?"
No I don't but actually there is an interesting lesson you can perhaps learn from this if you're willing to think about it. That feeling is something women often feel when they deal with certain types of men, uncomfortable isn't it?. Empathy for the win!
The three groups I currently game with fall into these categories:
Group 1: I've known and game with these guys for over 20 years. There is often a lot of ribbing about what is "manly" or not (for instance, I'm straight but I love cute, fuzzy animals and I'm always posting pics of them on FB. I catch hell for it from a couple of the guys). I'm not sure any of them are downright homophobic (well, I think one of them may be. He was hit on by a gamer friend many years ago and it really screwed up that friendship. To this day they don't talk).
Group 2: A pretty liberal group which is very open to multiple lifestyles and orientations. Their circles of friends (the ones that I'm not part of) include Wiccans, Pagans, LBGT folks, and even some polyamorous folks.
Group 3: Mostly teenagers and early 20s: The pejorative adjective of the times is, "That's so gay", or variants thereof. One of them is a youth pastor and he falls victim to that sometimes. I know some of them are friends with some gay and lesbian kids, but the phrase is so common now I don't know how they feel about it. There aren't any homophobes in this group (that I know of), but the constant calling someone's character "gay" just because they act or do something off the wall gets old.
I guess I said all that to say that the folks I know fall out of all different sorts of trees, but for the most part seem to be ok with the whole LGBT thing. At least I hope so.
"That's so gay." Is a phrase I use myself sometimes, meaning "That's so lame."
Recently I've been switching up my pejorative phrases based on the group I'm in. When a liberal friend of mine recently did something really lame I told him. "That's so Republican!" =p
Fun story about what happened at recent gaming group:
The other day we were having a cook out at my friend’s house and one of my DM’s was there. At one point my friend’s small daughter ended up running out into the street and I yelled at her to come back and stay out of the street and my friend looked at me in startlement and said:
“Holy #$%^, I’ve never heard a shout so commanding, this gives me an idea…”
At the next game group my group encounters an old red dragon for the first time, a villain who has been one of the main causes behind much of the adventures we have been doing and I get up and my DM hands me the lines I’m supposed to read in my dragon-like outdoors voice.
I proceed to bellow my lines at the players, mimicking the arrogance and mocking hostility of an ancient dragon that has a group of small beings on the ropes.
Everyone looks stunned for a moment until the player of the parties normally sarcastic rogue turns to the others and says: “What are we going to do?” in a small voice. At which point I took a threatening step towards him and gave him my most powerful dragon roar.
The other players cringed back in their seats while he fell head over heels backwards out of his chair.
He got to his feet and said: “I think I just #$% my pants. THIS IS AWESOME!”
I'm saying there has got to be more to you than your sexual preference(s).
I assure you my friend that there is nothing about me that is shallow or one dimensional and the same has held true for the vast majority of LGBT people I have known.
I've observed that it is often easier to tell a stranger the truth about yourself because the emotional investment you have in them is smaller. If a stranger tells you to go $%^& yourself no real loss, %^&* you too buddy, but if a friend of twenty years rejects you it has a far greater weight than a stranger because they know you well and you feel like they are truly rejecting YOU. Then again if they don't love you for who you actually are an argument can be made that they were never worth your time in the first place.
Alright, slow your roll people. I want this thread to be an oasis of calm where members of the LGBT community can share their stories in a peaceful atmosphere and perhaps make a silly joke or two. Anyone who wants to can comment but I'd prefer if you would make a conscious decision to promote tranquility in writing your posts. Arguments can and should be had about many subjects but here let's all be relaxed and laid back in this particular thread.
But...but...the rocketship was made out of cheese...Delicious cheese...
Mmmm I know, it's tasty. It's space flight capability is somewhat questionable though, Bree doesn't hold up well in a hostile vacuum, but that is just something gay couples have to deal with.
I have seen many reports of Christians being murdered in large numbers in Egypt and other places where the so called "Arab Spring" is taking place with the consent and most likely the funding and direct help of the United States government. Christians are openly maligned by "comedians" like the hateful Bill Maher and popular media sources like Yahoo.com. This all takes place with zero consequence and open support of the popular media. I seriously doubt anybody could take an openly anti-gay stance within the popular media or anywhere else without incurring some kind of serious consequence. The vocal minority has instilled it's own fascist control over the "tyranny of the majority". So yes, i am firmly in the belief that homosexuals and their agenda has already overtaken the popular media and are beyond reproach, be it by Christians or any other group. It is Christians, if anybody, who are under attack and being persecuted here in the United States and the World at large.
I'm honestly quite taken aback with this. I hear what you're saying but you seem to be a little mixed up. Let me see if I can point somethings out to you you may have missed.
You are completely correct that there are places in the world where Christians are being oppressed and killed for their faith. This is wrong and should stop. Persecution is never a good thing and we should do what we can to stop it.
Christians in the United States are not persecuted. They are mocked in ways that are just hurtful and yes it is widely considered to be an almost socially acceptable practice but being mocked, while hurtful to the feelings, is not persecution.
Persecution strips away opportunities, rights and social standing. It means being under a constant threat of violence and never knowing for sure you are safe. It means being widely reviled in a way that destroys lives and takes away the chance to pursue happiness.
Christians in the United States do not suffer that.
Members of the LGBT community have throughout the nations history and still do.
Do you know why the media does not mock us?
Compassion.
People see what we have suffered and have a hard time justify adding to that burden in even the slightest way.
The "Gay Agenda" does not rule the people on your TV, common decency does.
In alot of Muslim countries, gays are slain with impunity. Let's make sure we hate on the Christians who might look down on their sexual practices and lifestyle, and not the religion who bashes in their heads with rocks....
As a Christian i do not personally care what other's believe, as that is well beyond my control. I do not force my beliefs on anyone and if at all possible i avoid conflict of any kind. It saddens me to see my faith under full scale attack by the popular media, but at the end of the day i am powerless to combat such hatred. Truth be told i think the homosexuals are totally mistaken as to who is being oppressed. I am more of the assumption that it is people of faith, and not the gays who are being persecuted. No one can speak against gays and get away with it, whereas Christians are maligned at every turn with impunity. So spare me the "woe is me i am so oppressed" stance that so many homosexuals seem to take.
PG 13? That is a disappointment. I was hoping to tell everyone about how my $%#@% and my %&^*( with a !@##$% and she has an tennis racket and is like $%^&* ^%$%^&& $%^&&** the Great Pyramids of Egypt and $%^&* &*^%$$ &&*#% then Mister Ed is like “I’m confused what is happening here…” and I’m like %^&* ^^&&*^ &&**(() and my boyfriend is like “Where did that Ipod even come from then?” and I reply $%^&* $%^&* ^%$##^ rocket ship made entirely out of cheese.
But you’re right that probably is just entirely too graphic so I promise I will not bring up the details of my love life here.
