Attack Kobold #23's page

Studpuffin wrote:

I mine, therefore MINE!!!!

You know nothing about mining. You are a bird! A tasty, tasty bird.

MINE!

I mine, therefore MINE!!!!

You know nothing about mining. You are a bird! A tasty, tasty bird.

MINE!

My current application for the Guild is still being checked for traps, and thus is pending.

I am imminently qualified to be your Archnemesis because I can spell both 'imminently' and 'archnemesis' properly.

I will also ensure that the already entrenched flesh eating bats which I left in your lair when I was there last week are perfectly balanced between 'hungry enough to devour you' and 'not suffering from malnutrition'.

Also, I just placed a tripwire somewhere in this thread. I won't say what it's wired to, however.

Dastardly finish is my favorite! Kill many dragons that way!

*noms on CourtFool*

*lights things on fire*

*blows things up*

*takes a nap in a sunbeam*

You're quite welcome. The Red Dragon interview is the best of the lot, and while I'm not fond in any way shape or form of 4E, I found great amusement in it. And, well, I quote it ALL the time.

Yum yum YUMMY!

Mwa ha ha ha! It worked!!

I do not endorse complaining as a way of invoking shipment. But it apparently works.

Rar!! Rar I say!!

If griping about shipping makes shipping happen, I shall gripe!

Rar!!

SQUEE! There they are, now if only the site would let me DL them... grr...

Hee, well, it is going to be VERY busy. The fact that the site is up at all is a good sign as I remember how much fun there was (not for me, as I had DIFFERENT fun... with Amazon..) on the day of the Core launch.

I don't have it in DL's yet, but the personalizer's in 'wait for it' mode.

Pun Pun the Kobold will devour your soul!

Happy, Happy Birthday!!

May your day be free of adventurers!

We LOVE adventurers! They make the cutest noises before they go splat!

Hip hip, Hurrah! Hip hip, Hurrah!

Mikhaila Burnett wrote:

my wife

That's odd... I didn't think I'd actually miss the kobold chorus.

We love you!

James Jacobs wrote:

Halflings of Golarion will eventually happen; it's the only one we haven't done or announced yet, after all!

Kobolds of Golarion, how could you forget?

Yum yum yummy!

'Rixx wrote:

How many people in your family thought it might be clever to name their child "Jack"?

What an incredibly bizarre question.

** spoiler omitted **

AH!!!! *runs around on fire and lights the thread*

My tribe makes extensive use of stingstings and undead in our traps.

I majored in containers full of undead bees.

"What's in the treasure chest?"
"AAAAAAGH! Zombie bees!!!"

Good times...

*takes notes*

That explains how those spiders lived long enough in a sealed chest. Hmm...

Once I nearly caught one, but then it escaped. That's when I started making wood cages. Of course, now I feel glad I didn't catch it--now it's causing trouble at the Poodle thread!

Bwahaha!

Poodles make awesome traps when properly motivated.

*scampers off to properly motivate a poodle*

Oooh, Rust Monsters! I had a pet Rust Monster named Adam... then the evil, mean nasty Humans came along with their spell-casters and killed him. That Paladin of Bahamut was funny, running away and screaming like a little girl!

*sighs contentedly* I might have to trap another Rust Monster soon...

hmm traps hhmmm not a trap for Kobolds then but rather traps by Koblods.... Might be worth a gold or two.

Trapping a Kobold? HA!!!

Huh. They're giving away ham.

Well, it always gives me the runs.

*peeks out from the murderholes* *mutters quietly in Draconic and goes scampering to find #24*

"We need more ham gas traps!"

Wow, it's a swarm of Kobolds.

I feel much joy for my brothers and sisters. But apparently the human woman can't read.

*plants a sign reading "Fresh spiral cut honeybaked ham, this way*

*covers the pit trap that leads to the Astral*

If you must, use, um, poodles. Yeah, that'll work.

Who wouldn't want a nice exploding poodle?

Ooh, teleporting plague carrying explosive poodles! Where do I sign up?

Kobolds should be able to bring their pets into this thread...anybody seen Wolfie? I'm worried about him.

*looks around furtively*

Was he about this high? Furry? Yummy?

I don't think I've seen him, sorry.

Those are all forms of "throwing", so no.

Oh, yeah. No rabies, either. That's definitely no fun.

Filth fever? Slimy Doom? Plague?

Kobolds just wanna have fun!

Attack Kobold #23 wrote:

taig wrote:

Please no traps that involve "throwing" a mustelid at a victim. It's no fun for anyone.

How about dropping?

Teleporting might work as well

Ooh, I like your style! Teleweasel trap!

*runs off to order one from Acme*

Please no traps that involve "throwing" a mustelid at a victim. It's no fun for anyone.

How about dropping?

My fellow Kobolds, you make me very proud!

I also like the trap that has a narrow necked shatterproof bottle with a massive diamond at the bottle. Dust the diamond with a highly allergic swelling agent and watch how many stupid fleshies get their hand stuck in the bottle in their greed!

Mwa ha ha!

Mine is an evil, squeaky laugh

*looks about furtively*

I love traps. Big, small, lethal, funny, traps are awesome.

So, what's your favorite trap, my Kobold brothers and sisters?

I like the one with the big shiny door that actually leads to the bottom of the ocean. The Kraken ate a couple of my litter, but we finally got the door finished! That was AWESOME!!

Then the adventurers opened the door. When the flooding was done, we got to keep all their stuff!

Mwa ha ha ha!

Shiny!

Core Races - I'm a fan of humans and halflings. Although I usually let my race choice serve my concept. Sumo Wrasslin' Monk, I go Half-Orc. Puppet wielding Bard? Gnome or half-elf is my most likely pick.

Non-Core - PF Goblin (they have so much fun stuff to RP with. Afraid of horses and books, hatred of dogs. Pyromania and a penchant for getting "stuck", and a constant need to EAT).
I love Kobolds for an entirely different reason. Kobolds are pests, nobody likes them (within most campaign worlds) and they have a tendency to worship anybody more powerful than them. A kobold with delusions of grandeur is fun. A cowardly kobold is fun. A kobold who worships one of the other PCs as a god (dragon bloodline-sorcerer?) HI-LARIOUS!

Me worship NO ONE!!!

We love you!

Dragons are our masters. We love them!

Yum, yum, yummy!

*Attack misses and hits Son Of instead*

WTF!? Why did you hit me for?

Because I was HUNGRY!!!

NO FLAMES CAN BURN IN MY THREAD SO IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'LL HAVE TO ENJOY YOUR MEAL SANS COOKING.

*meeps at the booming voice*

Ok! I will instead eat my food raw.

1d20 + 200 ⇒ (19) + 200 = 219

*wins initiative and attacks the spirit*

Trap it! Burn it! Eat it!

*cackles maniacally in that adorable Kobold voice*

Ferrets, when properly motivated, make good traps! Especially Dire Ferrets!

*scampers off to properly motivate one...*

Set better traps!

I shall discuss this with the Beloved Spouse (Kobold chorus: "We love you!") and make my decision.

Where find chorus? Is chorus related to Tucker?

You will hopefully know MUCH sooner than that. Maybe even by the end of the year. Ducks are slowly coming together. But there WILL be novels set in Golarion next year! :)

-Lisa

Ducks taste like chicken and go quack when caught in traps!

I'm VERY excited about this!

Trap the foxie?

Firefox taste good?

*runs off to check fox traps*

Those products aren't showing up on your future subscriptions shipments because the order for them has been finalized and submitted, and will ship as soon as possible. See your order history page for more info.

If I had to guess what happened, it would be that at one point during your fiddling you switched to "Never hold anything," which the system currently interprets to mean "I'm tired of waiting for this stuff in my sidecart to ship, please ship it now." There's a warning beneath that selection that says something like "selecting this option will cause the 3 items in your sidecart to be shipped as soon as possible," but one of my current to-do items is to do a better job of giving feedback and verifying customer intentions for these kinds of actions.

We love you!

You ask me, but only answer is "burn" or "stab".

You forgot "scream" and "leap"..

Train you, I can?

Goblin traps inferior.

I substituted for better.

Boom today AND boom tomorrow!

Boom... boom boom boom boom boom...

Set traps? Catch trolls!

Eat Goblins...

Do not speak of our Beloved Master in such a way!

Wolfgang, we love you!

Trap it, burn it, won't you learn it?