Erioch Ourevest

Anthony J. Crowley's page

121 posts. Alias of Orthos.


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... why. You monster. Why. Why. Why. Why.

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Assassin's Ombudsman wrote:
The Vagrant Erudite wrote:

Freehold is in charge of the artillery? Does that make him the thread General or Regent? I always saw him as the Warden for some reason.

I have been playing far too much Kingmaker since the DLC went on sale and I bought the season pass.

All I know is Tac is the High Priest and Orthos the Magister, and Limey most likely seems like the Royal Assassin, because of his mastery of weaponry.

I'm clearly thinking too much about this.

Oh, certainly he can, but be sure he doesn't take you too literally and start believing he's Robespierre or Oliver Cromwell again.

How about Vetinari?

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gran rey de los mono wrote:
I listened to Queen for 12 hours straight, and now I feel a little ill. I think it's the high Mercury content.

Won't hurt ya. The weird feeling'll pass.

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A. Ziraphale wrote:
Anthony J. Crowley wrote:
A. Ziraphale wrote:
Oh, that won't do at all. Such a mess.
Not our problem, Angel.
But it's going to bother me! I'll know it's there.

Just think about Lunch instead.

Or dolphins.

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A. Ziraphale wrote:
Oh, that won't do at all. Such a mess.

Not our problem, Angel.

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Vanykrye wrote:
A. Ziraphale wrote:
Vanykrye wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:

So, I'm interested in other people's takes on this, so I'll try to report just the facts and see what people think:

(1) GothBard's company invited her to a "team building" picnic and requested an RSVP, which she happily accepted
(2) Once she had responded, she was assigned to one of four "teams" and told that the four teams would be competing in a series of events, and the winning team would receive "trash talking rights" and a trophy for winning
(3) At a meeting on Tuesday the various team members were already eagerly trash talking each other
(4) This morning the trophy showed up: A 5' hunk of bling the winning team would get to put up in the office and boast about for the rest of the year

So... thoughts?

They think a bunch of programming nerds need physical exercise?

I don't hate these things. I don't specifically like them either.

Basically the parts I actually hate tend to come down to most non-jocks' memories of recess and/or PE or just passing through the school halls in our younger years. It's not as bad in the workplace, most of the time, but it still happens.

But...

It gets people out of the office to help burn off stress, which is sometimes more important than any other stated goal.

If they do more of these, it should be balanced out with other kinds of activities, like escape rooms or a day at a high-speed driving school or whatever.

Or paintball!
Well, only if it's with live ammo. Those bastards in accounting have it coming.

Now we're talking.

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Fertilizer. You know, the stuff mortal creatures make when they get rid of things they eat. It's disgusting stuff but there's folks that turn it into material that plants eat. Great... Circle of Life, and all that.

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Oh, you know, just... regular upkeep, meaningful conversation, quality fertilizer, the screams of their damned friends when they fail to meet expectations.... you know, the usual....

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Sir RicHunt Attenwampi wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Scintillae wrote:
...on the down?side, it's got me listening to a lot of Queen. Which means that's going to be in my head when I run 5e people through kobold trap hell.
A kobold skald with Freddie Mercury's voice & theatrics sounds awesome.
steals

you stole it...before she made it?

Your mastery of time is awe inspiring.

{documentary voiceover:} If you do the Time Warp dance while singing from the Rocky Horror soundtrack, nothing happens. If you do it while instead singing along with Queen and orbiting around the Sun, you can actually travel through time. The grinding sound of the TARDIS as it (re)materializes is actually the temporal subharmonics of Sir Brian May's guitar amplified through a quantum badger so human ears can hear it.

You again?! How in the Heaven did you fit into the glove compartment? Out! Out!

*spritzes with cold-iron-laced holy water*

And stay out of my plants!

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Master Pugwampi wrote:
Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
Could be worse. Instead of Conor MonkGregor, he could be fixated on Connor MonkLeod: The Monklander. {somewhere, Queen begins to play}
Queen is always beginning to play...somewhere...

Sorry, left the window open in the Bentley.

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Greased or otherwise?

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Amby's Brain wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Woran wrote:
Hedgehog is back in the garden <3
There's a dirty joke in there somewhere...
something something bustle in your hedgehog something something spring clean for the FaWtL queen

*and puts player in reverse....*

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lisamarlene wrote:

Step 1: WW downloads all of Good Omens.

Step 2: WW and LM make plans to start binge-watching series after getting kids to sleep Sunday night.
Step 3: Freakish severe storms knock out power to over 300k homes, including LM's.
Step 4: Power company says, "We'll try to have service restored by 1900 hours Monday night."

That bites.

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Vidmaster7 wrote:
gran rey de los mono wrote:
A teenage boy walks into a brothel dragging a dead frog on a leash. He asks the head mistress specifically for a whore with an STD. The mistress is confused and asks the boy why. The boy says, "Well, when I go home my parents will go out and leave me and my little sister with a babysitter. The babysitter will have sex with me and get it. Then when my parents get home my dad will take the babysitter home, bang her on the way and get it. Then he will get home and give it to my mom. Then when my dad goes to work tomorrow, mom will have sex with the mailman and give it to him. And he's the a#!*#&$ that ran over my pet frog!"
Anti-Christ is that you?

Nah. I've met the kid, he's a lot better behaved than that, and you'd never catch him without his gang of friends or his dog.

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Freehold DM wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
YES! YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS! NUDITY! GLORIOUS GLORIOUS NUDITY!

the double favoriting of captain yesterday! This is a good omen!

Also good omens is on Amazon! This is also a good omen!

*raises glass, turns up radio*

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*raises a glass to that*

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Asmodeus, Prince of Darkness wrote:
Limeylongears wrote:
Ragadolf wrote:

Im working.

Kids dance shows.
All Summer.

All.

Summer.

O_o

Ohhh, Rags.

As they say, 'When you die you will go to heaven, as you've served your time in hell'.

Dude, come on! Even I'm not that cruel!

It's not you, man. It's that Baalzebul guy. He's a right bastardly bugger.

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Vanykrye wrote:
Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Apparently when I'm really tired after a long commute, I will still occasionally walk up to the front door, push the unlock button on the car keyfob, and then be confused when the apartment door does not unlock. It happened I did it again today. Which makes me wonder what possible accidents I may have obliviously caused on the drive home.

Man that's weird. I once accidentally stuck my car key in the apartment door lock and the entire apartment building started up. Drove it down I-55 and eventually just parked in the median.

(My sincerest apologies to Steven Wright.)

I've had days like that. Typically after long nights drinking with Aziraphale.

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Hunt, the PugWumpus wrote:
Selene Spires wrote:
What is the Anti-Gremlin?

As you are astutely aware, gremlins are the single bright spot in the entire evolutionary tree that are faeries. Why you'd want to choose anything other than a Gremlin is mindboggling, but...

Hmmm. I suppose the Anti-Gremlin would be either an AMC Javelin or Nash/AMC Ambassador. Whichever you choose, get one with the original shag carpeting and the OEM 8-track player.

Also, be sure to leave a tape, any tape -- cassette, scotch, masking, measuring, Buzzsaw, Ravage, etc. -- in it for at least two contiguous weeks and it will automagically turn into a copy of Best of Queen.

There you are, you little blackguard. Get out of my car!

<spritzes Hunt with cold iron-laced holy water>

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DungeonmasterCal wrote:
I read not long ago that a group of scientists analyzed the voices of many pop and rock singers. According to their findings, Freddie Mercury had the greatest voice of all time, not accounting for singers from before the era of voice recording.

Sounds legit.

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captain yesterday wrote:
Had a dream last night, but all I can remember after waking up is that It had Another One Bites The Dust, by Queen.

Do you remember a smell of smoke and asphalt, by any chance? Asking for a friend.

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captain yesterday wrote:

Tiny T-Rex's new favorite song.

Bohemian Rhapsody

We've taught them well.

<hat tip>

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lisamarlene wrote:

Perhaps other Neil Gaiman fans will understand what I mean when I say that this evening I was driving home through the rain wearing a black leather moto jacket, listening to a Best of Queen mix on the MP3 player in my car, and wondering why my car wasn't magically being transformed into a Bentley.

And then, as I listened for the high notes that just weren't there, I realized that the problem was that the song I was listening to was an Adam Lambert cover of a Queen song, not the original, and ergo insufficiently magical.

Well see, there's your problem. It only works if it's the original package. Covers just don't have the soul, the authenticity. And trust me, I know all about soul.

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Scintillae wrote:
One of my kids is reading Good Omens. There is yet hope for culture out here.

Just gotta make sure their music is decent.

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So long and thanks for all the fish.

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Karen Eiffel, Author wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:
Uncle Teddy wrote:

I'm just going to blame Cosmo for roundabouts and the individuals who thought putting them on Wisconsin roads, especially when the terrain makes roundabouts a very bad and very dangerous idea, was a good idea.

I shall also add that I blame Cosmo that the aforementioned individuals cannot decide on a single design for the roundabouts - some are two-lane, some are one-lane, and some are a twisted combination of the two, and all have the center so raised up that one cannot see oncoming traffic unless one is in a semi.

I shall also blame Cosmo that, no matter the design, none of them are ever plowed decent, if at all, in the winter because the design makes such activity difficult, if not impossible.

I blame Cosmo that in California, they put Stop signs around every roundabout, showing a complete and utter lack of understanding of their purpose.

Is it any wonder California drivers have no clue whatsoever how to use roundabouts?

Very clever, Mr. Cosmo. Verrrrrry clever!

I blame Cosmo for continuing this constant one-upsmanship with Crowley across the pond in the English DoT.

I'm still winning.

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Queen feat. Mario M. Mario

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.... hey, so that's where that went. Been looking for you.

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thegreenteagamer wrote:

"We Are The Champions" by Queen can instantly get any song out of your head. True, it will be stuck, as (not a joke, Google it) it is the biggest earworm song that exists, as proven by science.

...still, Queen at least is good. I had Quiet Riot going for hours in the noggin before I got Freddie and the gang to exorcise the demons.

I coulda told you that.

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Tacticslion wrote:
Cap'n Yesterdays Winter Madness wrote:
G%#+#&n cold out.
So... Cania, then?

Worse. Jersey.

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E. Scrooge, Stone Cold Miser wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:

Steps in... rattles around a bit...

Old Man Cratchet, is.. is that you?..

Don't you mean Marley?

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Ride on, wizard man, ride on.

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I'd vote for him.

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Elminster, Rockstar of Wizardry wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Elminster, Rockstar of Wizardry wrote:
I'll save you!
I'm not a female. You can't save me.
C'mon! Why do you think I created the Polymorph school, and Axe body spray.

Hell doesn't even take credit for that one, mate. Tread light-like.

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If he's Space Satan does that make him my boss?

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Sharoth wrote:
Orthos wrote:
Sharoth wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Aranna wrote:

What is going on...

They assigned axe body spray guy as my assistant. He is like the last person I would have selected. On top of his habit of bathing in the stuff, I have overheard him bragging to coworkers about the long list of women he has slept with including a friend of his on her wedding day. And now he has an excuse to be close... He even called me cupcake for some reason. I swear this is like a bad nightmare.

I'm sorry. I'll wear less body spray, I promise.
Please do. Even I am becoming attracted to you and I am a heterosexual male.
AXE is actually making someone attracted to someone wearing it?!
I was just being a smartass.

Oh. Whew. Had me goin' for a moment there. Put a right scare on me, and good.

I've been through one Apocalypse already. Well, near-Apocalypse. Prematurely canceled mid-opening event and postponed. Anyway, not looking to repeat the experience quite yet.

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Orthos wrote:
Sharoth wrote:
Freehold DM wrote:
Aranna wrote:

What is going on...

They assigned axe body spray guy as my assistant. He is like the last person I would have selected. On top of his habit of bathing in the stuff, I have overheard him bragging to coworkers about the long list of women he has slept with including a friend of his on her wedding day. And now he has an excuse to be close... He even called me cupcake for some reason. I swear this is like a bad nightmare.

I'm sorry. I'll wear less body spray, I promise.
Please do. Even I am becoming attracted to you and I am a heterosexual male.
AXE is actually making someone attracted to someone wearing it?!

I think that's a sign of the Apocalypse. Again.

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Drejk wrote:
Magic circles, seals of Solomon, and such would be a wee bit more appropriate to cover your that demon.

My ears are burning....

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Archangel of Fawtl wrote:
Anthony J. Crowley wrote:
captain yesterday wrote:
Pea Bear, while we're looking around the Halloween costumes asks incredulously "who would want to be an angel on the day we honor the Devil!"
I know an angel, I'll ask 'im.
F~%@ if I know. I celebrate the day with hookers and blow.

You're not Aziraphale... I mean I'm not complaining either... count me in.

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captain yesterday wrote:
Pea Bear, while we're looking around the Halloween costumes asks incredulously "who would want to be an angel on the day we honor the Devil!"

I know an angel, I'll ask 'im.

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Karen Eiffel, Author wrote:
Aniuś the Talewise wrote:
Chemlak wrote:

Roundabouts.

Ah, roundabouts.

I'd like to introduce you all to The Magic Roundabout, Swindon, UK. This was part of my route to work for 8 years.

Enjoy.

are those roundabouts

within roundabouts

and those squiggly lines on the roads? why are they squiggly? what do they mean?????

The Magic Roundabout was Crowley's Round 2 FiendishStah! submission that eventually got him the job designing the M25 Orbital Motorway.

*burning hat tip*

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Is this a sign of the apocalypse? Again? Where's that bloody book?!

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Oceanshieldwolf wrote:

I awoke from a terrible hangover, and am now ready to get properly knurd.

I'm pretty sure in my dream there was a treasure chest with many legs and an abominable appetite, people walking upside down with hook-boots on the ceiling of a very large cavern, a small blue man (or was it very man small blue men?), a geriatric savage in a loincloth, impossible fossils placed as a joke to future generations and a planetary bank who was my dad. I think. It was very hazy, and I kept thinking that if I divided every job into small portions the weird tall gaunt figure might not take my soul.

I've had nights like that, man.

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Then Famine retired later and Pollution took his place.

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14. A Chelish acolyte who draws power directly from a broad lexicon of infernal dukes.

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Matthew Downie wrote:
Jaelithe wrote:
TheMonocleRogue wrote:

Couldn't Do It If You Tried

Roll a natural 20 five times in a row.
Aren't the odds against this 3,200,000-to-1?
3,200,000-to-1 chances crop up nine times out of ten.

Sounds right to me.

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William Dymock-Johnson wrote:
I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:
If we get to count the Pact Magic Vestiges, then I believe that that is my answer. I was especially jazzed when I discovered most of them were references to Ars Goetia demonology - it's like D&D stopped to take a good look at itself in the mid-'000s, looked back at the 1980s, and proceeded to wave a big, gleeful middle finger in Jack Chick's face.
Another Ars Goetia fan here. Mad, bad and just plain strange. The Lesser Seal has a demon for you. And that Sier guy. Didn't so much fall as went with the crowd.

Well, it was more like sauntering vaguely downward, really.

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The burning building attracts the hellwasps from the nest I planted nearby. Draight is swarmed and incapacitated, then dragged back to the nest to feed the young.

... okay it's not my usual MO but the place is a bit far away from the freeway.

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snickersimba wrote:

Kyra, what is the best part about being a cleric? I wanted to join the clergy for sarenrae but there was too much forgiveness and not enough murder. I do not care who the heck you are, touch my bacon and I will skin you alive.

This is also why I think sarenrae is the dumbest god ever. Nethys is cool, he seems more reasonable. Torag is too loyal bound. I don't like being expected to do stuff. I do stuff when I do stuff.
Also, what are your thoughts on the new warpriest?

Translation: "Smite me, oh mighty smiter!"

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Dun dun dun, and another one bites the dust,
Dun dun dun, and another one bites the dust,
And another one gone, and another one gone,
Yeah another one bites the dust

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