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"While I enjoy poo-poo humor as much as anyone on Golarion, I'm not sure they will act quickly enough to affect them... effect them... which one is it?
"But there's only one cook in this place. We get to him, his name is Gregon, and we can give them something unappetizing. Like... well, I don't know, I eat anything, like a pig, but you mere humans have teeny tiny palates."
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"Agreed on the laxative failing to fulfill the load. We may aim to wipe away the competition, I suspect they'll cling to their seats." he whispers.
"The band may liven the place a bit, though theirs no telling how the barkeep will take to the fanfare. Shall we give it a go? I mean, worst case scenario we could burn the sucker down."
"You know...we'd make sure everyone made it out of course. We're not murderhobos or anything."
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Nodding slightly, Omnia looks around a moment. "Uh...actually..."
Waving his hand a bit, interweaving laces of ethereal matter form a cup. "Sorry lass, but no water..."
Trailing off, his eyes light up. "OH! I could use this to scoop water onto the fire. Yep. There's a solution for ya." he finishes with a wink.
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"Sorry, I just thought..."
With a flick of his wrist, water from the sea douses the front of him, washing away the remaining meal. Holding the same hand outward, the water sucks out of his clothing and seems to hang in the air before him a moment.
"I must have missed something. Happens all the time, though, so don't worry. If you need water pre-prepared, I can always make sure nearby rain barrels are nice and full before we toss a flaming cocktail into the place."
"People like steamed salt water, right?" she grins.
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Seren says a little prayer to herself, then approaches the barman, "Hey, so, can I, um get a drink. And, also, my friend, he, ah, he wants to put on a bit of a show for his friends. It'll liven up the place, you'll love it..."
Seren pays a gold piece extra for her ale and smiles again at the barkeep.
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Seren approaches the bartender/proprietor and bedazzles him with considerable charm...and the extra tip didn't hurt either. He eyes her speculatively and nods. "Aye, lass, we have an accord then...around noon you say? Maybe that'll pick up the lunchtime crowd..."
Elena digs around some on the grounds outside the tavern, and scores some grotesque-looking bugs...she thinks they might have just the right taste for the agents in mind...
After inquiring and looking about, Wesley finally finds a three-man musical troupe. While the Mad Cow engages their interest and they agree to the gig, since it's so last minute, they demand twice their normal pay...
Bibi, who decided to tag along with Wesley in finding a band, interjects. "A tuba you say? Aye, we have a tuba we play on occasion but it's not requested much. You hear that boys? The nice lady wants loud! We'll do drums, trombone, and tuba! Can't get much louder than that! And since we love loud and don't get to do it much, we'll accept this gig at our normal rate. We'll meet you outside The Overflowing Oyster a few minutes before noon then!"
With everything pretty much set, everyone goes back to the tavern. Wesley awaits with the band just outside the front entrance awaiting word for when the agents are spotted. Omnia, seeing his friends have things well in hand, stands by to see how he can assist when the plan goes in motion...
Huong is the lookout, finding a spot from which to observe both entrances. While the normal meager lunchtime crowd, primarily sailors and more seedy looking characters, he notices two men entering from either entrance at the same time. His sharp eyes pick up a small snake symbol on the nearest man's shirt, so he's sure this is the Aspis agent...he then sees the Aspis agent nod to the other newcomer, and they approach a table in the back, sit, and order before they start talking...
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Bibi catches up with Elena just before noon; since she's planning on being part of Team Creepy-Crawly, she makes sure she's there to get a small handful of bugs.
"I hate to do this, but if we want to disrupt their meeting without them feeling targeted, we'll have to do this to more than just them," she whispers, keeping her head on a swivel. "By Arshea's left-- well, at any rate, I hope the bar owner's an a-hole so this doesn't ruin my karma or whatever. Don't really want this thing we're making go around to come around back to me, y'know? Gonna be checking my food for weeks..."
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Having got on so well with the barkeep, Seren decides to try his brother as well.
"Your brother said we could have a bit of fun and, well, some of my colleagues pulled a prank on me, we do it all the time, and I need to get them back. So, if you just let me help you prepare a couple of meals..."
She also places a gold piece on a kitchen shelf for the brother, "They'll be furious but, don't worry, they'll blame me. Not you." She giggles.
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Elena passes the bugs to Bibi and Seren as needed and goes to sit a table over to ready herself for some ruckus. She orders some food and a tankard beforehand. After a song or two, Elena starts booing and heckling the band. "That's horrible! I hate that song! Play something else!" She pounds on the table with her fist in frustration.
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Bibi slips inside like a shadow, a handful of insects wrapped up in a scarf in her pocket.
Please don't pop in my jacket, [i]please don't pop in my jacket, if bugs get into my armor and lay eggs I'm going to have to burn it...[/i]
With Seren hopefully being able to prepare the bowls without having to fight the cook, Bibi passes by them and looses the string keeping the scarf closed into a pouch, and deploys the insects into the bottoms of both bowls. They seem a bit sluggish-- probably due to Bibi's cold influence.
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Huong moves over to the table with the two agents playing up the use of his staff to walk,..."Hey there! I say Heeeyyyy there!" he calls out loudly, hoping to draw some attention to the duo, ..."I know what THAT symbol means. You worship one of those fake Snake Gods. Not like my True God Apsu the Dragon! Why would one of you slime bellies be doing in a fine establishment like this?"
;
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Wesley leads the band in and positions them next to the pool in the center. He glances over to Huong. He's calling an audible, calling an audible...
"Hey, brutha, I'm tired - of you religious zealots - trying to police everything about an honest man. If these men wanna worship snake gods or demon lords, or ASURA RANAS, I say, they're free to!" The Mad Cow says. Then he whispers into Huong's ear, "Just go limp, I'll keep you from hurtin' yerself, brutha."
He then grabs Huong by his robes and hurls him onto the table next to the two agents.
He then nods to the band to have them start playing as loudly as possible.
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While Bibi secures the bugs from Elena, Seren sweet talks the cook. The cook smiles shyly, saying, "That's OK...but just make sure it's just those two meals..."
Bibi then sneaks in and is able to infest both bowls with her bugs and. luckily, they did not poop in her jacket...she arranges the bugs at the bottom of the bowl so they won't be as noticeable...
The two agents are served their food and, after a couple of bites, the bugs are discoverd, and an especially grisly one can be seen squirming from the Aspis agent's lips, and both start retching. The Kortos agent spits out his food, along with a bit of indignation at his Aspis cohort, yelling, "And you chose this dump to meet with me???" The other patrons look up in horror at the scene and start pushing their meals away from them, yelling for refunds...
The bartender/proprietor looks on in horror, screaming at the cook, "Brother, what have you done?" The cook answers in a panic, "It was the girl...it was supposed to be a prank!" as he points to Seren. The barkeep responds, "Quick brother, go get the city watch!"
As the cook leaves, Huong tries to accuse the Aspis of being a cultist but they are not in the mood, and start towards him with ill intent. Wesley hurries over and intervenes, making a feigned wrestling move that sends Huong flying onto the table...and then all hell breaks loose! The band makes a grand entrance from the double doors, playing loudly (and badly at that). Elena starts heckling the band, but as she slams her fist into the table, it flops over and she falls to the ground...
Among the ruckus, you see the Aspis agent looking in dismay at the scene while the Kortos agent screams at him, "We're done here!"
The barkeep tries to restore order, yelling, "Stay calm, all is well!" as the patrons either start to leave or join in the scuffle started by Wesley. The bartender heads menacingly towards Seren...
And then, the first of the City watch, enters the establishment, one at each entrance.
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As soon as the cook leaves and they're left relatively unattended, Bibi clears her throat.
"Vixen-person time," she whispers, and her features shift. Her blonde hair recedes and surrenders to a patch of short white fur, and the same covers the rest of her body as a vulpine snout pushes itself out.
It's actually a little troubling to look at, unless you're into that kind of thing.
Soon, a fox-person stands where a human-person once stood, and she looks around confusedly.
"I meant to leave with the other customers but found the kitchen instead!" she explains to the watchwoman at the entrance. "You mind if I squeeze right past you so I don't get in the way?"
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Transforming into his boar-like state, Wesley prepares to engage with the town guard. "Its okay, I can speak with pigs once per day," He says.
He raises his hands up as if he's about to surrender. But with his newly enhanced move speed , he starts running and trying to avoid any entanglements. "You'll never take me alive! Can't catch a greased pig!" He tries to get around the guard and onto the streets where his 40-foot move speed should allow him to outrun the guard.
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”Ope—hold on,” says the sleepy fox as she passes the guard. ”My shoe’s untied. Always kind of a pain to tie them, y’know? Got these cute little peets but they don’t make shoes that fit ‘em properly in Avistan.”
She ducks down and pretends to fiddle with her shoe for long enough for the guard to get bored, then taps the wet ground beneath her feet. ”There we go!”
When the watch woman’s attention is firmly back on Seren, Bibi starts gesturing in big “come here, run!!” motions.
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The chaos grows exponentially with the appearance of the City Watch, as everyone in the tavern, to include your present company, scatters.
Elena, looking towards the windows and getting a good read on them, gets a running start and goes bursting through the double set of windows, landing cleanly on the dock outside, suffering only very minor scrapes...
Bibi tries the subtler approach, changing to fox form as a disguise and walking past the guardswoman at the SW door...befuddled by her appearance and having been told several humans were causing a ruckus and, as this foxy lady did not fit the description, the guard lets Bibi pass...
Huong races up to the same door, trying to distract the guard by turning her attention to the Aspis, gets rebuffed. ”Neither you nor the snake man are leaving till we sort things out!”
Wesley tries the same door, but his coordination deserts him at the worst possible moment and he trips on a chair leg and his acrobatic move turns into a weak slide that lands him at the feet of the guardswoman. She looks down at him, shaking her head, muttering, ”It is truly spoken that pigs can’t fly...”
Bibi, seeing her friends in trouble, tries to ease their escape by planting a patch of ice at the guard lady’s feet...
Seren, comparing the size of the guard to herself, demurs and tries the servant’s entrance on the opposite side. As she gets to the door, the cook returns from summoning the watch and his eyes go wide as he spots her. As he’s about to call the guard, seeing the ruckus is in the main room and she has a little time, Seren gently tends to his throat wound, the salves and her expert touch lessen the scars and his eyes go wide again, this time in gratitude. He spurts out, in a very raspy and almost inaudible voice, ”...’anks...” He steps aside, bows, and lets her out the door...
Omnia on the other hand, takes the opportunity provided by Bibi and bull rushes the guardswoman...
...bowling into her and knocking her flat as she slips on Bibi’s ice...Huong and Wesley, seeing this opportunity, crawl past the grasping guard’s reach...and you all make haste to get a healthy distance away from the tavern...
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"I was kind of hoping that would be you, actually," Bibi chuckles as the group comes together once more, about as far as their collective legs could carry them. She might be the weak link there, actually.
Her features morph back into a human shape, and she tilts her head this way and that to crick her neck. "All right, so, Rat Street, or a nap? I know my preference, but the Ten don't pay me for sleeping."
She looks thoughtful for a moment, then shrugs. "Nah, I probably couldn't make that work."
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After a well-deserved, yet necessarily short, celebratory rest, you head out towards the sewers. Delroya’s directions lead you to an isolated alley in the Bristles, and then down into the sewers beneath Diobel. The stench of sewage mixes with the sharper odors of chemical fumes and decay and permeates the damp tunnels. From this intersection, tunnels lead west and south into the darkness. A third tunnel heading east is filled with detritus, filthy beddings, food scraps, broken glass, and rotting furniture. An alcove lies beyond a collapsed portion of the tunnel’s southern wall, and further east, a statue of a giant rat rests in the dead-end passage. Countless empty flasks and discarded alchemical ingredients lie on the floor around the statue. On a nearby workbench sit several organized but empty flasks and jars...
There are narrow, not to mention slippery, ledges just above the slow-flowing sewage...you also notice what looks like a couple of sickly and derelict folk, one to your east and one across the sewage to the southeast...
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"Hanspur, the rat-god of waterways and smugglers: he gets worshipers in the River Kingdoms usually. Not so common on the Isle of Kortos." Seren recalls her lessons, "Sister Agatha did not approve."
Concerned, Seren approaches the sickly person to the east, "Are you in need of help?" She addresses the person, asking them about their needs and ailments.
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Seren approaches the nearest sickly person, a seemingly older destitute man. He smiles at her, his eyes glazed over, murmuring, ”Why should I need help? Isn’t it beautiful here?”
As Huong casts light and a protective spell, he peers around warily...why he doesn’t see anything more than meets the eye from his current location, he thinks the alcove with the statue and the opening to an area in the south require further investigation...
As Elena walks along with Seren, she can see through to the entrance of another area across the sewage to the south. While she can’t see much detail, she can detect two more sickly people within...
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Suddenly aware of the dark as she tries to observe the man, Seren produces a sunrod and taps it on her starknife.
With the aid of the light, she looks over the man and sighs, "Well then, be well."
The cleric makes a mental note to do what she can for these unfortunates once they have dealt with their likely supplier and returns to the group. "I suspect these may be the test subjects for this drug." Seren whispers.
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As they descend into the sewer, Bibi gags.
"Ohhhhh I forgot sewers were smelly. I should have objected more. Is it too late to break onto the ship instead?" she groans.
She slips her shield onto her arm and plugs her nose with her free hand. "Let's see if I can just--"
She starts rapid-casting Purify Food and Drink into the sewage, in the hopes that it will start smelling Less Awful.
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"I would agree the platform route has the best chance of success."
"It's too bad these souls are lost...You think there's something your god can do for them?" inquires the ganzi.
Shaking his head, he begins to make his way down the platform. "Lets just get this supplier dealt with."
Seren shrugs apologetically, ”A place to stay for a little while, clean clothes, full bellies, a good night’s sleep... they’re the starting point. The local temple might be able to help.” she pushes back her hair, ”And there are spells that can heal the mind and spirit from the toll that drug addiction can take.” the cleric makes an apologetic smile, ”I am still an initiate but, the things I have seen...”